Monday, May 25, 2015        Edition: #5458

Bully For You!

★ Hot on the heels of the monumental success of the movie “Pitch Perfect 2”, which has had the biggest box office opening ever for a musical, star Hailee Steinfeld (who plays ‘Emily’) has officially signed to Republic Records. The singer, performer, and Academy Award-nominated actress (‘Best Supporting Actress’ for 2010’s “True Grit”) is currently in the studio working on her debut release. (“Pitch Perfect” is basically just “Glee” for the bigscreen … what makes it so successful?)
★ Speaking at the graduation ceremony for New York University’s Tisch School Of the Arts, actor Robert De Niro has warned the Class of 2015 they’re ”f—ed” and they’ve opened a ”door to a lifetime of rejection”. The legendary actor, who did not attend university himself, then went on to praise the graduates for recognizing and reaching for their destiny. Quote: ”When it comes to the arts, passion should always trump common sense.” (Dropping the F-bomb at commencement … bet the moms & dads were impressed.)
– “New York Daily News”
★ And Ashley & Mary-Kate Olsen have now officially ruled themselves out of the “Full House” reunion TV show. Fans had hoped the twins would return to the franchise that launched their careers and re-team with the likes of John Stamos and Jodie Sweetin for the spinoff sitcom “Fuller House”, but the show’s producer has confirmed the grown-up child stars, now 28, will be no-shows. (So is the house half-full or half-empty?)

• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Cage the Elephant (“Melophobia”). Rerun.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Fences f/Macklemore (“Arrows”). Rerun.
• “Grace of Monaco” (Lifetime) – Nicole Kidman stars as the Hollywood star-turned-Princess of Monaco. Tim Roth plays her husband, Prince Rainier. The film was slammed by both critics and Monaco’s royal family when it premiered at Cannes last year … the reason it’s on TV.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Ludacris (“Ludaversal”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Gap Dream (“Shine Your Light”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/Omni 1) – Dave Grohl (Foo Fighters). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Jack Antonoff (Bleachers). Rerun.
• “Texas Rising” (History) – Debut of a miniseries on the founding of the Texas Republic, with a big, bold look and some historical background you might not know.
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Josh Groban (“Stages”). Rerun.
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Hunter Hayes (“Storyline”) performs his new single “21”, which goes to digital retail tomorrow. He resumes the “Wheels Up Tour” with Lady Antebellum and Sam Hunt this Friday in Wantagh NY.

• Barbra Streisand – She’s writing a memoir that promises to set the record straight about her fascinating life and career. The multi-talented 73-year-old has signed a deal with Viking, an arm of publishing giant Penguin. The bio is due in 2017.
• Eminem – His Shady Records label will release “Southpaw (Music From & Inspired By The Motion Picture)”, for the upcoming boxing movie “Southpaw”, which stars Jake Gyllenhaal. The album is out in July, and the 1st release will be an Eminem single called “Phenomenal”.
• Enrique Iglesias – The Spanish music video for his hit “Bailando” has accumulated over 877 million YouTube/VEVO views. As a result, it’s become the #5 most viewed video of all-time on YouTube.
• Foo Fighters – Tonight they begin a UK tour at Sunderland’s Stadium of Light. Iggy Pop and Royal Blood are the support acts.
• Kelly Clarkson – Similarities between her “Heartbreak Song” and Jimmy Eat World’s hit “The Middle” have been noted by many online. Clarkson, a longtime fan of the band, claims she honestly never noticed. Quote: “I thought it was really cool of Jimmy Eat World to say, ‘Hey, no harm, no foul’. There are only so many chords.”
• Mariah Carey – Music label boss LA Reid says it’s not realistic to expect her to top the charts again. Quote: “Nobody that put out records 25 years ago is going to have a #1. Not Paul, Stevie, Bruce, Mick or Keith. Not Prince, not anyone.” However, he says, there are many things that Mariah can still do. Like Vegas.
• The Muse – Frontman Matt Bellamy says walking rather than songwriting has helped him get over his split from Kate Hudson. He’s revealed that he’s habitually taken countryside hikes after ending his 4-year relationship with the 36-year-old actress.
• Taylor Swift – Her “Bad Blood” music video is the new Vevo record holder, delivering 20.1 million views in 24 hours. That breaks the record set by Nicki Minaj, whose “Anaconda” music video had 19.6 million views in 24 hours in August 2014. In addition to breaking this record, 11 of Swift’s videos are ‘Vevo Certified’ with over 100 million views each.

French shoppers have become the first to experience a new LED lighting system that sends special offers and location data to their smartphones. A total of 2.5 km (1.6 miles) of the hi-tech lights have been installed at a Carrefour supermarket in Lille. The system transmits codes via light waves, which are undetectable to the eye but can be picked up by a smartphone camera. Then an app, which uses Philips technology, enables shoppers to quickly search and locate preferred products or detect promotions nearby. The app also allows customers to see their location in the store. As an added benefit, the new lighting system requires 50% less electricity than the old lights it replaced. (We need this, because actually speaking to an employee and asking “Where’s the frozen peas?” is way too much trouble.)
– Sourced from BBC Technology

Thousands of new words have been added to the Scrabble dictionary. In all, about 6,500 new are included in the latest “Collins Scrabble Word List”, some that are slang terms used on social media. A few of the new entries, along with what each scores in the game …
✓ ‘Cazh’ – Slang word meaning ‘casual’. (18 points)
✓ ‘Checkbox’ – A small clickable box on a computer screen. (28 points)
✓ ‘Dench’ – Slang term meaning ‘excellent’. (11 points)
✓ ‘Geocache’ – An activity where participants seek hidden items using GPS. (16 points)
✓ ‘Hacktivist’ – A person who hacks computer systems for political reasons. (22 points)
✓ ‘Lotsa’ – Slang meaning ‘lots of’. (5 points)
✓ ‘Newb’ – Shortform slang for ‘newbie’, itself a slang term. (9 points)
✓ ‘Thanx’ – Short for thank-you. (15 points)
Other additions include eew, emoji, hashtag, obvs, onesie, shizzle, twerking, vape, and yeesh. The Scrabble dictionary includes words from Australia, Canada, South Africa, the UK and the US in a single list. This is the first update since 2011. (Is this ‘Scrabble for Dummies’?)
– Condensed from “Daily Mirror”

Drug dealers in Marseille, France offer loyalty cards. (“Oh look, I have 5 baggy stamps!”)
– “The Local”


1939 [76] (Sir) Ian McKellen, Burnley UK, movie actor (“The Hobbit” films, “Lord Of the Rings” trilogy, “X-Men” series)  BS FACTOID: He’s just revealed in “Daily Mail Weekend” he considered turning down his knighthood in 1991 because he thinks the system for choosing honorees is unfair. Why not fire chiefs or people who’ve spent their lives doing charity work?

1944 [71] Frank Oz, Hereford UK, movie director (“The Stepford Wives”)/Muppeteer (‘Miss Piggy’, ‘Fozzie Bear’, ‘Bert’, ‘Grover’, ‘Cookie Monster’)/voice actor (‘Yoda’-“Star Wars” series)

1963 [52] Mike Myers, Toronto ON, movie actor (“Shrek” series, “Austin Powers” movies)/Canadian Walk of Fame (2003)

1975 [40] Lauryn Hill, South Orange NJ, pop/R&B singer (“Doo Wop [That Thing]”, The Fugees-“Killing Me Softly”)

1976 [39] Cillian Murphy, Douglas, Ireland, movie actor (“The Dark Knight Rises”, “28 Days Later”)/TV actor (“Peaky Blinders” since 2013)

1980 [35] Joe King, Denver CO, pop-rock singer-guitarist (The Fray-“You Found Me”, “How to Save a Life”)

• “African Liberation Day”, when many African countries celebrate the hard-fought achievement of their freedom from European colonial powers.  It was founded in 1958 and coincides with the African Union’s “Africa Day”.

• “Buddha Day” in China & South Korea, commemorating the birth, enlightenment (nirvāna), and death of Gautama Buddha.

• “Flitting Day” in Scotland, where many houses are rented by the year, and today families have to decide whether to ‘sit’ or to ‘flit’.

• “Geek Pride Day”, a day for sci-fi fans and techno-nerds to stand tall. The date coincides with the 1977 release of the first “Star Wars” movie. What is a geek? The Geek Pride Organization says ‘you know one when you see one’.

• “International Missing Children’s Day”, promoting awareness of the problem and safety tips for kids and parents. We’re encouraged to turn on porch lights in observance as a way to show hope and support for missing kids and their families.

• “Memorial Day”, observed on the last Monday in May in America as a day of remembrance for those who’ve died in the nation’s service. It was originally called “Decoration Day” when General John Logan declared a day to decorate Civil War soldiers’ graves with flowers at Gettysburg PA in 1868. (Nowadays its more often observed as ‘Beach Day’ or ‘Picnic Day’.)

• “Tap Dance Day”, honoring the birthday of Bill ‘Bojangles’ Robinson, ‘King of Tap Dancers’, in 1878. (You can do an on-air tap dance using 2 pencils on the microphone … gently.)

2007 [08] “Pirates Of the Carribean: At Worlds End” opens in movie theaters (eventually racks up $961 million worldwide)

2011 [04] Oprah Winfrey airs her final program, ending the 25-year TV run of “The Oprah Winfrey Show”

2001 [14] 32-year-old Erik Weihenmayer of Boulder CO becomes the 1st blind person to reach the summit of Mt Everest

2012 [03] The Dragon spacecraft developed by SpaceX becomes the 1st commercial spacecraft to successfully rendezvous with the International Space Station

2007 [08] Wayne Fontana of ’60s group The Mindbenders (“Game of Love”) is reprimanded by a judge as he arrives for his London trial on charges of setting a police car on fire as ‘Lady Justice’, replete with cape, crown, and carrying a sword & scales (someone did a little too much mind-bending back in the day)

1990 [25] Gary Stewart of Los Angeles CA sets a Guinness World Record by hopping 177,737 times on his pogo stick

[Tues] “America’s Got Talent” season debut (NBC)
[Tues] “Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?” season premiere (FOX)
[Tues] World Lindy Hop Day
[Wed] Cellophane Tape Day
[Wed] Senior Health & Fitness Day
[Wed] World MS Day

Hurricane Preparedness Week / International Gay Square Dancing Week / Tire Safety Week / Week of Solidarity With The People of Non-Self-Governing Territories


Highlight bits culled from 22 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
• The average guy is 34.4-years-old, 5-ft 10 ins, 175 pounds.
• The average guy gains about 1.1 lbs each year. (All of it around the gut.)
• The average guy takes about 14 minutes to have sex. (Slightly longer if someone else is involved.)
• The average guy has sex 79 times a year, or 1.5 times a week. (Those .5 occasions can be SO embarrassing.)
• The average married guy has about a 1-in-4 chance of cheating on his wife. (Meaning 3 out of 4 women who are propositioned say ‘no’.)
• The average guy brushes his teeth 1.9 times a day. (A half-ass job in the morning and a thorough job after the family dog gives him a big sloppy kiss when he gets home.)
• The average 40-year-old guy can balance on 1 foot for 9 seconds. (Usually after stepping in a backyard gift from the neighbor’s mutt.)
– First published in “BS” 2000.

Have male contestants attempt to answer these household-type questions …
• What can you put in hardened brown sugar to soften it? [No, not Vaseline. A slice of apple.]
• To prevent eggshells from cracking, what do you add to the water before hard-boiling? [Silcone caulk ruins flavor. A pinch of salt is more advisable.]
• What should you put on your Tupperware to prevent it from staining when storing tomato-based sauces? [Paint is too stinky. Try non-stick cooking spray.]
• If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it’s still cooking, what can you add to fix it? [An entire bottle of Tabasco might mask the problem, but a peeled potato will absorb the excess salt.]
• Candles will last a lot longer if you do this for 3 hours prior to burning them. [Marinating them in kerosene is ill-advised. Put them in the freezer.]
• How do you determine if an egg is fresh? [A cordless drill may work, but it’s less messy to immerse it in cool, salted water. If it sinks it is fresh, if it floats … throw it away!]
• How can you extend the shelf-life of celery? [Varnish makes it too crunchy. But if you wrap it in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator, it will keep for weeks.]
– First published in “BS” 2001.

☎ What is the best superpower? Let’s decide this once and for all!

I asked Siri for a wake-up call this morning. She sent me a photo of me surrounded by empty potato chip bags and cats.

• What does ‘Honolulu’ mean in the Hawaiian language?
a. ‘Sheltered Harbor’ [CORRECT]
b. ‘Darkening Skies’
c. ‘Big Waves’

• Which has more islands?
a. Japan
b. The Philippines [CORRECT. It’s an archipelago of over 7,000 islands.]
c. St Lawrence River

Question: About a third of single women say that THIS is their biggest concern on a date.
Answer: Excessive sweating.

Choose heaven for climate, hell for society.

Talitha Ligo @ Nau FM Port Moresby, Papua New Guinea; Mark Pryke @ Pulse, Somerset UK; Steve Smith @ Country Superstars 102.3 [WJKO] Smithfield NC; Sam Wood @ New Country 98.3 [WRAN] Taylorville IL; and Duke Dance @ Star Valley Internet Radio, Afton WY.

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