Wednesday, May 25, 2016 – Edition: #5738

Bully For You!

★ Actress Angelina Jolie has signed to teach a course at the London School of Economics. It’s part of a new 1-year Masters of Science in Women, Peace, and Security program that focuses on the effects of war on women. No specifics have been given on how often Jolie would be on campus or what her responsibilities would be, but in general, a ‘visiting professor’ gives guest lectures, participates in workshops, and does some work on their own. Jolie quote: “I am looking forward to teaching and to learning from the students as well as to sharing my own experiences of working alongside governments and the United Nations.”
– “New York Times”
★ 45-year-old actor-filmmaker Tyler Perry is planning to turn his new home into a farm after cashing in on the record-breaking sale of his Atlanta GA mansion. He offloaded his city home for $17.5 million earlier this month, thereby setting a new record for the highest price ever paid for a private property in the Georgia capital. Tyler reveals he has since moved his family into a French Provincial-style estate on a 17-acre compound on which he plans to keep animals and grow his own produce. Quote: “It’s the same distance to the studio as my old house, but now I can have horses and pigs and organic vegetables.”
– E! News
★ And Whoopi Goldberg is executive producing a new transgender modeling reality show. The actress-turned-TV host is developing “Strut”, which will center around the management and talent at Slay Model Management, the first exclusively transgender modeling agency. People tend to focus on the stereotype instead of the person, she says, and this series will give viewers a unique insight into the real people who are struggling with the same challenges we all face as we make our way through the world. The show is slated to premiere later this year.

• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Declan McKenna (“Paracetamol”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Belly (“Another Day in Paradise”, out Friday).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – The Thermals (“The Body the Blood the Machine”).
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/M3) – Fleur East (“Love, Sax and Flashbacks”).
• “Live With Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – Guest co-host Seal (“7”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Anderson Paak & The Free Nationals f/TI (“Malibu”).
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Boy George (“This Is What I Do”).
• “Wendy Williams” (syndicated) – Boy George again.

• Beyoncé & Jay Z – According to new reports, they’ve finally recorded an album together. Word has it the secret project is ready to drop soon.
• Calvin Harris – He’s ready to resume his Las Vegas residency at the Hakkasan club tomorrow night after recovering from a car crash last Friday. Taylor Swift’s boyfriend had to cancel gigs after he was hospitalized. He’s said to have suffered shock as well as a cut on his nose.
• Carrie Underwood – She tells “Country Living” magazine that she and husband Mike Fisher are now designing their ‘forever home’. Her list of must-haves are a wood-burning fireplace, a porch swing, and rocking chairs.
• Kanye West – A former bodyguard of is dishing some diva-esque dirt on the star. Steve Stanulis tells UK’s “The Sun” that ‘Ye does not push elevator buttons, and once flipped out when Stanulis didn’t know which floor to select. Another insight: “Kanye never, ever apologizes.”
• Lady Antebellum – Their hiatus is about over. After taking some time for themselves over the past year, the group is scheduled to perform at a slew of fairs and festivals this Summer. First up: Bayou Country Superfest in Baton Rouge LA on May 27th.
• Lady Gaga – She’s turned heads in Malibu CA by showing up at a grocery store … on a horse. The singer was gifted a white horse by her label executives last Christmas and apparently decided ride in to a local store. Her purchase? A healthy green smoothie.
• Mariah Carey – She’s returning to the Hallmark network with 3 new TV movies, which she’ll direct and star in. She made her directorial debut last December with the Hallmark movie “A Christmas Melody”. The new projects air over the next 2 years. She has agreed to write and record an original song for each.
• Paul McCartney – He’s admitted in a new BBC interview that his band Wings was not “a good group”. The band, which he set up with his late wife Linda, had a string of hits including “Mull of Kintyre” and “Live and Let Die” and won 6 Grammy Awards. But despite the success, Wings has always been widely ridiculed. Now it appears that Paul agrees with the critics.
• Tragically Hip – Yesterday they announced that 52-year-old frontman Gord Downie has terminal brain cancer. Even so, they intend to go on another tour this Summer, saying they feel it’s the right thing to do.

Cutting-edge vocab …
• ‘Brotox’ – The use of Botox and similar cosmetic procedures by men.
• ‘Snaccident’ – The accidental eating of a large quantity of snack food.
• ‘Vertical Forest’ – A tall building designed in a way that enables trees to be planted on all or most of its balconies.

• It’s your best protection against wrinkles, age spots, and sagging skin. After all, sunshine is radiation.
• It’s not just for super-pale people. The Sun doesn’t care what color your skin is, or if you have a tan already.
• You need to wear it every day. The Sun is out there, rain or shine, even when you can’t see it.
• Reapplying is just as important as applying. You really should reapply every 2 hours, or more often if you’ve been sweating or in the water.
• A bottle of sunscreen should not last more than a few months. Sunscreen loses all its efficacy after about 3 years.
• Don’t skimp! Dermatologists recommend using 1 ounce of sunscreen (enough to fill a shot glass) to cover your body and face each day.
• “Baby’, ‘Sport’, and ‘Waterproof’ are just marketing terms when it comes to sunscreen. There is no such thing as ‘waterproof’ sunscreen … it’s actually illegal to claim otherwise.
• SPF figures are less important than regular use. Sun Protection Factor (SPF) is simply an indication of what percentage of the Sun’s rays a product is blocking.
• You don’t need sunlight to get Vitamin D. Most of us get all we need from our regular diets.
• Sunscreen is not enough. Hats, beach umbrellas, and long-sleeved shirts are also your friends when it comes to protection from the Sun.
(Seemingly to insure future melanoma, stats show the average woman in her 20s visits a tanning salon twice a month.)

A statistical look at who we are and the things we do …
• 82% of adults admit that they eavesdrop in restaurants.
• 80% of us think we’re really good at taking pictures.
• 50% of your friends don’t necessarily think that your are friends.
• 38% of women say swimsuit shopping is the most stressful thing about going on vacation.
• 33% of us have had someone steal an idea from us at work.
• 20% of guys say they’ve left a Post-it love note for their partner as a romantic gesture.

The 31-mile ‘Chunnel’ connecting England to mainland Europe was no small engineering feat, but Switzerland has stepped up the game. On June 1st, it begins testing trains in the world’s longest, deepest tunnel. The $12-billion ‘Gotthard Base Tunnel’ cuts through solid rock as deep as 7,500 ft beneath the Alps and runs a whopping 35.5 miles. Allowing passenger trains to travel up to 155 mph, the twin tunnels (one for each direction) should reduce travel times between Zurich and Milan, Italy from 5-plus hours to 2½. It took 17 years to build and cost the equivalent of the 2012 London Olympics. It’s set to open to passengers in December.
– “Swiss Info”

• In 2006, an Australian man tried to sell New Zealand on eBay. The price rose to $3,000 before eBay shut it down.
• In 2006, a Wisconsin man legally changed his name to ‘Andy Griffith’, hoping it would help him get elected as county sheriff. Instead, he was sued by real-life actor Andy Griffith.


1939 [77] (Sir) Ian McKellen, Burnley UK, movie actor (“The Hobbit” films, “Lord Of the Rings” trilogy, “X-Men” series)

1944 [72] Frank Oz (Oznowicz), Hereford UK, voice actor (‘Yoda’ in “Star Wars” series)/Muppeteer (‘Miss Piggy’, ‘Fozzie Bear’, ‘Bert’, ‘Grover’, ‘Cookie Monster’)

1963 [53] Mike Myers, Toronto ON, movie actor (“Shrek” series, “Austin Powers” movies)/Canadian Walk of Fame (2003)

1975 [41] Lauryn Hill, South Orange NJ, pop/R&B singer (“Doo Wop [That Thing]”, The Fugees-“Killing Me Softly”)

1976 [40] Cillian Murphy, Douglas, Ireland, movie actor (“In the Heart Of the Sea”, “The Dark Knight Rises”)/TV actor (“Peaky Blinders” since 2013) COMING UP: “Dunkirk” (2017).

1980 [36] Joe King, Denver CO, pop-rock singer-guitarist (The Fray-“You Found Me”, “How to Save a Life”)

1991 [25] Guy Lawrence, Reigate UK, electronic musician (Disclosure- “Latch”, f/Sam Smith-“Omen”)

• “African Liberation Day”, when many African countries celebrate the hard-fought achievement of their freedom from European colonial powers. It was founded in 1958 and coincides with the African Union’s “Africa Day”.

• “Buddha Day” in China & South Korea, commemorating the birth, enlightenment (nirvāna), and death of Gautama Buddha.

• “Flitting Day” in Scotland, where many houses are rented by the year, and today families have to decide whether to ‘sit’ or ‘flit’.

• “Geek Pride Day”, a day for sci-fi fans and techno-nerds to stand tall. The date coincides with the 1977 release of the first “Star Wars” movie. What is a geek? The Geek Pride Organization says ‘you know one when you see one’.

• “International Missing Children’s Day”, promoting awareness of the problem and safety tips for kids and parents. We’re encouraged to turn on porch lights in observance as a way to show hope and support for missing kids and their families.

• “Senior Health & Fitness Day”, the 23rd annual observance on the last Wednesday of May, promoting the importance of regular physical activity for seniors, and showcasing what local organizations are doing to improve the health & fitness of older adults in their communities.

• “Tap Dance Day”, honoring the birthday of Bill ‘Bojangles’ Robinson, ‘King of Tap Dancers’, in 1878.

• “World MS Day”, the Multiple Sclerosis International Federation’s annual campaign to raise awareness of the condition, and to support and connect the 2.3 million people living with it.

2007 [09] “Pirates Of the Carribean: At Worlds End” opens in movie theaters (eventually racks up $961 million worldwide)

2011 [05] Oprah Winfrey airs her final program, ending the 25-year TV run of “The Oprah Winfrey Show”

2001 [15] 32-year-old Erik Weihenmayer of Boulder CO becomes the 1st blind person to reach the summit of Mt Everest

2012 [04] The ‘Dragon’ spacecraft developed by SpaceX becomes the 1st commercial spacecraft to successfully rendezvous with the International Space Station

2007 [09] Wayne Fontana of ’60s group The Mindbenders (“Game of Love”) is reprimanded by a judge as he arrives for his London trial on charges of setting a police car on fire as ‘Lady Justice’, replete with cape, crown, and carrying a sword & scales (someone did a little too much mind-bending back in the day)

[Thurs] Eat More Fruits & Vegetables Day
[Fri] “Alice Through the Looking Glass”; “X-Men: Apocalypse” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Heat Awareness Day
[Sat] Hamburger Day
[Sun] Indy 500 (Indianapolis IN)
[Mon] Memorial Day (USA)
This Week Is … Tire Safety Week
This Month Is … Salad Month


Forget about ‘Gender Identity Facilities’ and ‘Gender Neutral Bathrooms’, here are some restroom issues more worthy of immediate attention …
✗ Sticky floors.
✗ No hooks inside stalls for coats and bags.
✗ Pee on the seats.
✗ Unflushed toilets.
✗ No toilet paper.
✗ Empty soap dispensers.
✗ Inoperative automatic faucets.
✗ Lack of hot water.
✗ Germ-flinging dryers instead of paper towels.
✗ Over-flowing trash cans.
✗ Misspelled graffiti.
– Thanks to Annie Logue

☎ Is censorship ever justified?

Hear about the short fortune-teller who escaped from prison? She was a small medium at large.

Can you name the category that fits all 3 items given?
• Lima, Kidney, Pinto … Beans.
• Pinto, Arabian, Andalusian … Horses.
• Scarab, Dung, Rhinoceros … Beetles.
• John, Paul, Ringo … Beatles.
• Aft, Bow, Port … Nautical Terms.
• Port, Cabernet, Riesling … Wines.
• Thyme, Cilantro, Mint … Herbs.
• Mint, Rum, Lime … Mojito Ingredients.
• Chihuahua, Durango, Tabasco … Mexican states.
• Tabasco, Mayonnaise, Worcestershire … Condiments.

Question: 8-out-of-10 women’s swimsuits have THIS in common.
Answer: They never get wet.

It has to get worse before it gets better.

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