Wednesday, May 28, 2014        Edition: #5228

You’re Up to Your Eyeballs in Sheet!

★ Another broadcast TV season is officially in the books. The top 10 shows by total viewers …
1. “NFL Sunday Night Football” (NBC)
2. “The Big Bang Theory” (CBS)
3. “NCIS” (CBS)
4. “NCIS: Los Angeles” (CBS)
5. “Dancing With the Stars” (ABC)
6. “The Blacklist” (NBC)
7. “The OT” NFL wrap-up show (FOX)
8. “The Voice” – Monday (NBC)
9. “Person of Interest” (CBS)
10. “The Voice” – Tuesday (NBC)
★ It’s been confirmed that filmmaker Bryan Singer will return to direct the next chapter of the mutant superhero “X-Men” movie series. The follow-up film to current blockbuster “X-Men: Days of Future Past”, which has already made over $300 million in global box office, will focus primarily on the younger generation of superheroes, including Jennifer Lawrence’s ‘Mystique’ and James McAvoy’s ‘Professor X’. “X-Men: Apocalypse” is set for release on May 27, 2016.
★ And “X-Men” star Jennifer Lawrence has revealed that she may someday quit Hollywood to become a nurse. Seriously. The 23-year-old says she originally came to Tinseltown with a 5-year plan – if things didn’t work out she’d go to nursing school. While her career is going great guns these days, she says she still sometimes thinks about jacking in the fame & fortune and pursuing a future in nursing. Can you imaging clumsy J-Law coming at you with a needle?
– “Metro”

• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Eli Young Band (“10,000 Towns”). Rerun.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – OneRepublic (“Native”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Sir Sly (“Gold”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV2) – Black Label Society (“Catacombs Of the Black Vatican”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/Omni1) – A performance by the Broadway cast of “If/Then”. Rerun.
• “So You Think You Can Dance” (FOX/CTV) – In the 11th season debut, dancers try to wow the judges during auditions. And Justin Bieber introduces top dance crews. Two crews will be featured on each of the audition shows (the season’s first 4 episodes).
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Ziggy Marley (“Fly Rasta”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Vampire Weekend (“Modern Vampires Of the City”). Rerun.
• “World Music Awards” (NBC) – The international music awards show based in Monte Carlo, founded in 1989 by Prince Albert II of Monaco. Scheduled performers include Flo Rida, Jason Derulo, Mariah Carey, Miley Cyrus. Pre-recorded Tuesday night.

• Justin Timberlake – He’s being kitted out by designer Neil Barrett on the second half of his “20/20 Experience World Tour”, which kicks off in Abu Dhabi this Friday.
• Kanye West – He reportedly had London artist Bambi create a portrait of wife Kim Kardashian as a wedding gift. Meanwhile, the newlyweds are said to be on their honeymoon in Ireland, where they are staying at the 5-star Castlemartyr Resort in Munster, County Cork.
• Metallica – The first leg of their 2014 European tour kicks off tonight in Helsinki, Finland. The trek runs through July 11th in Warsaw, Poland. Fans are being encouraged to vote on each concert’s set-list.
• One Direction – Harry Styles has been spotted getting … hair extensions. At least, that’s the word from fellow pop star Lily Allen who’s tweeted that she personally witnessed old floppy locks having hair enhancement. Is she joking … or could he be going bald?
• Paul McCartney – The 71-year-old has been discharged from St Luke’s International Hospital in Tokyo, Japan after almost a week recovering from a mysterious viral infection. That’s caused the cancellation of 5 concerts, but the US leg of his tour will go ahead as planned on June 14th.
• Queen – They’re bringing Freddie Mercury back from the dead for a new album similar to Michael Jackson’s posthumous release “Xscape”. Brian May tells the BBC they plan to release new material later this year, which will include unreleased songs by Mercury, who died in 1991.
• Taylor Swift – Her upcoming concert in Thailand has been axed amid political turmoil in the country. She had been scheduled to play Bangkok on June  9th as part of the Asian leg of her “Red” world tour.
• Tupac Shakur – He was shot dead 18 years ago in 1996 on the Las Vegas Strip and now Chris Carroll, the police officer who was first on the scene, has revealed Shakur’s final words. When asked who shot him, Shakur looked straight into the cop’s eyes and replied: “F— you”.

New cutting-edge vocab …
• ‘Digital Tattoo’ – The difficult-to-remove digital imprint that a person creates by posting information online and/or by accessing online resources.
• ‘Generation Rent’ – The new generation of young adults who cannot afford to buy a house, particularly in areas where housing prices have risen dramatically.
• ‘SBNR’– Stands for ‘Spiritual But Not Religious’. More and more people (up to a third) are now rejecting organized religion but embracing spirituality based on individual beliefs. These people are sometimes referred to as ‘Nones’ … as in no particular religion.

Dining alone is often perceived as a sad and lonely affair, but in Amsterdam two Dutch design agencies have teamed up to eliminate this culinary stigma by creating ‘Eenmaal’, the world’s first restaurant for parties of 1. The small venue with 10 tables – each for a single diner – is intended to break down the taboo of eating out alone. ‘Eenmaal’ is a Dutch word meaning both ‘one time’ and ‘one meal’. A 4-course dinner, including drinks, costs $50. The company is expanding its brand by creating products for the ‘1-person market’, such as a 375-ml bottle of ‘not-for-sharing’ champagne, and later this year it will open new locations in Berlin, London, and NYC. (What do you do to look busy when dining alone? Read? Constantly check your phone?)

A BS breakdown of who we are and what we do …
• 65% of couples say they had an argument during their last vacation because one of them would not stop checking work email.
• 50% of us classify ourselves as ‘normal’ when it comes to the way we dress.
• 32% of women say they would never workout in front of a man.
• 27% of us admit that we have gone through a supermarket express lane with too many items.
• 22% of people in a poll are proud to say they have used a coupon on a first date.
• 10% of couples admit to arguing over how long the other person is taking in the shower.

Spending time at home is way more stressful than spending time at work, according to surprising new Penn State research. The study measured participants’ cortisol levels, which is one of our bodies’ major markers of stress. The results show that, for both men and women, spending time at home is not very relaxing; and women in particular often feel calmer at work. One reason may be that workdays are often fairly straight-forward: You know what’s expected; you know what types of problems will arise; and you know you can eventually leave. But at home, you’re confronted with bills, housework, a relationship, and caring for kids. There’s no compensation, and you’re supposed to enjoy this ‘leisure time’ despite unexpected diversions and unforeseen problems. (Yeah, but you can’t hang out in you bathrobe at the office.)

At the impressive height of 120 feet (37 meters), a new Guinness Record has been set in Budapest, Hungary for the ‘World’s Tallest Tower Made of Lego’. The new world record was achieved by a bunch of school kids using thousands-upon-and thousands of the plastic blocks. The previous record was held by US students at Dickinson High School in Delaware.

• General Motors had a list of 68 words employees could not use to describe safety issues, including ‘defect’, ‘deathtrap’, ‘widow-maker’, and … ‘Hindenburg’.
• Chinese scientists are testing a Maglev high-speed train operating in a vacuum tunnel that they say could reach speeds of 2,900 km/hr (1,800 mph).


1945 [69] John Fogerty, Berkeley CA, oldies singer (“Centerfield”, w/CCR-“Proud Mary”)

1964 [50] Phil Vassar, Lynchburg VA, country singer-songwriter (“Love Is a Beautiful Thing”, “In a Real Love”)

1968 [46] Kylie Minogue, Melbourne, Australia, pop singer (“Can’t Get You Out of My Head”)/movie actress (“Moulin Rouge”)

1977 [37] Elisabeth Hasselbeck (Filarski), Cranston RI, TV co-host (“FOX & Friends” since 2013, “The View” 2003-13)/reality TV contestant (“Survivor: The Australian Outback” 2001)

1985 [29] Colbie Caillat, Newbury Park CA, pop singer (“Brighter Than the Sun”, “Bubbly”)

1985 [29] Carey Mulligan, London UK, movie actress (“The Great Gatsby”, “Drive”)

• “Amnesty International Day”, recognizing the need to protect human rights around-the-world. The organization strives to accomplish this by publicizing problems and encouraging citizens, governments, and politicians to take action.

• “Senior Health & Fitness Day”, an annual observance  on the last Wednesday of May begun in 1993 to promote wellness for the elderly. 2014 theme: ‘Make a Move Toward Better Health’.

• “Sierra Club Day”, celebrating the 1892 founding of the oldest, largest, and most influential grassroots environmental organization. Chapters throughout the US & Canada offer opportunities for local involvement, activism, and outdoor outings for 1.3 million members.

• “Whooping Crane Day”, a salute to the rare waterbird that’s almost become extinct. Today there are only about 400 left in the wild.

• “World MS Day”, the Multiple Sclerosis International Federation’s annual campaign to raise awareness of the condition, and to support and connect the 2.3 million people living with it .

2010 [04] Gary Coleman, former child star of 1970s TV sitcom “Diff’rent Strokes”, dies at age 42 in Provo, Utah 2 days after suffering a brain hemorrhage

2003 [11] Paul McCartney and 2nd wife, Heather Mills, announce the impending birth of their 1st child, to be named Beatrice Milly

1937 [77] German government forms a new state-owned auto company which 1st produces the ‘Volkswagen’ (‘The People’s Car’)

1987 [27] Paul Pearman jumps over 21 barrels … on a skateboard (Augusta GA)

[Thurs] Learn About Composting Day
[Thurs] International Day of UN Peacekeepers
[Fri] Mint Julep Day
[Fri] Heat Awareness Safety Day
[Fri] “Maleficent”; “A Million Ways to Die In the West” open in movie theaters
[Sat] Wicket World of Croquet Day
[Sat] World No-Tobacco Day
This Week Is … Week of Solidarity With the People of Non-Self-Governing Territories
This Month Is … Mediterranean Diet Month


Just as “X-Men: Days of Future Past” cleans up in movie theaters, here’s a look at some real – but really dumb – superheroes that have appeared in comic books …
✗ ‘Animal-Vegetable-Mineral Man’ (Doom Patrol, 1964) – Can change any part of his body into any animal, vegetable, or mineral. He got these powers after … falling into a vat of amino acid.
✗ ‘Ant Man’ (Tales to Astonish, 1962) – A scientist who fights crime by shrinking down to ant size and wearing a special helmet to control ants. This is actually being made into a movie.
✗ ‘Big Wheel’ (Amazing Spider-Man, 1978) – Ooooh, it’s so scary … a man in a giant wheel. Couldn’t he get tripped up by a pothole?
✗ ‘Bouncing Boy’ (Action Comics, 1961) – After drinking the wrong can of soda pop, he can now inflate like a ball when trouble is afoot … and bounce.
✗ Captain Canuck (Comely Comix, 1975) – A truly Canadian superhero. What is he going to fight, beavers? Hockey thugs? Healthcare? Kindness?
✗ ‘Chlorophyll Kid’ (Adventure Comics, 1963) – His big ability is … he can make plants grow.
✗ ‘Color Kid’ (Adventure Comics, 1966) – Can change the color of any object he wants. Wow.
✗ ‘Dummy’ (Leading Comics, 1941) – Able to look like a ventriloquist dummy whenever trouble strikes. It’s never made clear whether he is a very short human or an actual wooden puppet.
✗ ‘Paste-Pot Pete’ (Strange Tales, 1963) – Also known as ‘The Trapster’, he has created a supervillian costume that gives him the ability to … shoot glue at people.
✗ ‘Squirrel Girl’ (Marvel Super-Heroes, 1992) – She has a pet squirrel. She can control squirrels. She wears a squirrel fur-lined bodysuit. Creepy.
– Adapted from

A new study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.

• What do you call a female rabbit?
a. A cow.
b. A doe. [CORRECT. A male is a ‘buck’ and a baby bunny is a ‘kit’ or ‘kitten’.]
c. Horny.

• An angry gorilla does this to show anger while a native of Tibet does it to show respect.
a. Places finger in ear.
b. Sticks out tongue. [CORRECT]
c. Humps your leg.
– “Totally Trivial”

☎ Seoul, South Korea has just introduced larger parking spaces (both longer & wider) especially for female drivers. These ‘lady-friendly’ spots are marked in pink paint with a mini-skirted logo, and are located closer to entrances and elevators. Apparently this is just part of a $95-million campaign to boost safety in ‘Women-Friendly Seoul’. Good idea or totally patronizing?
Question: According to a recent study, most people do THIS about 250 times a year.
Answer: Blow their noses.

80% of success is just showing up.

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