Monday, May 30, 2011        Edition: #4516
Tomorrow’s Show Prep Today!

• Gil Scott-Heron, dubbed the ‘Godfather of Rap’, died in a NYC hospital Friday at age 62. He was most famous for his spoken word piece “The Revolution Will Not Be Televised” in 1970. He went on to establish a catalogue of work that bridged various musical genres such as jazz, soul, and blues. He’s been referred to as everything from a poet to a ‘bluesologist’.
– “San Francisco Chronicle”
• A friend of Brit singer Cheryl Cole claims Simon Cowell ‘pushed’ her to leave the UK version of “The X Factor” and join his upcoming US version even though she had reservations. She was then ‘shocked & stunned’ at being given the ax after just 4 days on-the-job. She’d planned her whole year around the new show, but is now back in the UK and unemployed as she’s already been replaced on the British show.
– “News Of the World”
• 34-year-old actor Orlando Bloom is now lined up to appear in filmmaker Peter Jackson’s screen adaptation of “The Hobbit”, reprising his “Lord Of the Rings” role as the pointy eared elf ‘Legolas Greenleaf’. He joins a cast that already includes Ian McKellen, Andy Serkis, and Martin Freeman. The 2-part, 3-D prequel, currently filming in New Zealand, is thought to be costing a whopping $500 million.
• The yellow T-shirt Zach Galifianakis wears throughout “The Hangover II” emblazoned with a Labrador Retriever already has its own Facebook page, ‘Hangover 2 Alan’s Yellow Dog Shirt’. The shirt’s popularity is a complete surprise to its 62-year-old designer Rita Reed. She created Friskybizpet Designs, featuring photos of pets, in her retirement. She’d never even heard of “The Hangover” movies when she was asked for permission to have one of her shirts in the film. Now Urban Outfitters has ordered up 16,000 of the T’s to sell in its stores.
– “Kansas City Star”
• There’s an odd thing happening on non-fiction bestseller lists, whereby a series of show biz memoirs have all been released at virtually the same time. Looking for a beach book this Summer? How about …
– Betty White: “If You Ask Me (And Of Course You Won’t)”
– Dick Van Dyke: “My Lucky Life In & Out of Show Business”
– Rob Lowe: “Stories I Only Tell My Friends”
– Shirley MacLaine: “I’m Over All That & Other Confessions”
– Steven Tyler: “Does the Noise in My Head Bother You?”
– QMI Agency
• And 31-year-old Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo has wed 24-year-old Candice Crawford, sister of actor Chace Crawford (“Gossip Girl”). The ceremony was Saturday in the historic Arlington Hall in Dallas TX. She’s a former beauty queen and television reporter. He’s a former boyfriend of sorta singer Jessica Simpson.

• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Far East Movement (“Free Wired”).
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/A Channel) – Taylor Swift (“Speak Now”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Rammstein (“Liebe Ist Fur Alle Da”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – 1970s-80s metal band Twisted Sister.
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni) – Willie Nelson w/Norah Jones & Wynton Marsalis perform “Here We Go Again”.
• “Platinum Hit” (Bravo) – Debut of yet another musical competition. Singer Jewel hosts and gives feedback to 12 aspiring singer/songwriters alongside former “American Idol” judge Kara DioGuardi. Guest judges will include Donna Summer, Leona Lewis, Natasha Bedingfield, Ryan Tedder (OneRepublic), Taio Cruz and others.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel) – Sergio Mendes w/Siedah Garrett (“Bom Tempo”).
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Tinie Tempah (“Disc-Overy”).

• Adam Lambert – He’s working on his sophomore album and tells MTV News that he’s written about 18-to-20 songs to pick from for the project.
• Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet Band – They just wrapped their current tour on the weekend and are already talking about hitting the road again for 2 months this Fall because there are ‘so many places they didn’t play’.
• Brad Paisley – He’s been performing professionally since he was 13. This week he tops “Billboard” magazine’s ‘Country Songs’ chart with “Old Alabama”.
• Jimmy Buffet – His upcoming “Buried Treasure” album will include at least 20 original songs and covers that he recorded in Nashville 1969-73. There’s no official release date as yet.
• Keith Urban – He says he & his family manage to live a quiet life under the radar in Nashville but are surprised by the paparazzi treatment they get elsewhere. That’s why when we see photos of them, it’s usually when they’re visiting NYC or LA.
• Lady Gaga – She tells “Financial Times” she wants to record a Christmas album of jazz standards and she’s already spoken to her manager about it.
• Robbie Robertson – He’s just been made a member of the Order of Canada and was inducted into the Canadian Songwriter Hall of Fame earlier this year. He’ll be featured in a Canadian Recording Artists postage stamp series that will be issued next month.
• Taylor Swift – She tells MTV the weirdest place she’s have ever written a song is in an airport, where she ran into a washroom to grab a paper towel in order to write down the lyrics.

Vuvuzelas, those annoying horns used by soccer fans celebrating last year’s World Cup, not only cause noise pollution but may also spread diseases. One study shows that even a short burst on the instrument creates a spittle shower similar to a sneeze, at the rate of 4 million droplets a second. In crowded venues one person blowing a vuvuzela could infect many others with airborne illness like the flu or TB. Organizers are considering whether or not to ban them at the 2012 London Olympics. (Yes, please! Spare us all, do it!)
– BBC News

• A Penn State University study shows kids listen to an average of 10,500 hours of music between grades 7 and 12. But interestingly, even when a song’s message is very clear, 66% of them seem to have no idea what the lyrics mean.
• A sociologist at the University of California-Davis says the personality that most attracts you to a mate may eventually doom the relationship. What seems interesting because it’s different from your own personality (ie: a weird sense of humor) is often the trait that eventually drives you crazy!
• A study by a German university published in “Men’s Health” says most people will consider you intelligent if you are attractive, reasonably fit, and dressed conservatively with well-groomed hair. Researchers also say people with round faces are considered dumber than those with long or oval faces. Seems it doesn’t matter that you’re a total moron … as long as you look good.

The number of texts sent by a teenager per month now averages 3,339 … a 566% increase over the last 2 years. A few other scary stats …
• 56% of teenage drivers admit to talking on their cellphones behind the wheel.
• 47% say their social life would end or be worsened without their cellphone.
• 42% say they can text while blindfolded.
• 20% admit to sending nude or semi-nude photos of themselves to others.
• 13% admit to texting while driving.
– Condensed from

Construction and demolition debris takes up more than a third of landfill space annually even though more than 60% of the average house could be recycled. Fortunately, what’s been tagged ‘home deconstruction’ is increasingly becoming the environmentally-friendly alternative to demolition. This labor-intensive, job-creating approach takes unwanted buildings apart systematically and reuses the materials in new home construction or donates them to non-profit reuse centers, such as Habitat for Humanity’s ReStore. (Not only is it a greener approach, old materials are often far better made. Solid wood doors, for instance.)
– “Christian Science Monitor”

Different morning routines and different activity levels affect individual breakfast needs. Dietitian Mary Bamford prescribes best breakfast foods for each lifestyle …
• The Busy Multi-Tasker – Your mornings are all about juggling the needs of kids, car-pool, work prep, and getting out the door with your sanity intact. Go-go-go morning rushers should make protein, fruit, and fiber their mantra.
• The Slow Starter – You find it difficult to wake up alert and refreshed, and your mornings (and desk job) are more sedentary than you’d like. For a sedentary lifestyle, just the essential carbs are needed: a little fruit and one serving of grains to go along with protein-rich food.
• The Morning Athlete – You’re raring to get out the door at the crack of dawn for a heart-pumping workout. You may not feel much like eating before you head out but if you’re training hard you definitely need to gulp down some pre-workout carbs.
– Condensed from “Best Health”

A UCLA study published in the “Journal of Personality & Social Psychology” reports that 60% of observers can correctly guess people’s sexual orientation simply by watching them walk. However, the technique apparently only works accurately on men. When guessing the sexual orientation of women based on their gait, the results don’t exceed random choice. (Works better if you ask them to throw a baseball.)

• A third of the world’s smokers now live in China.
• It is illegal to sell Moon rocks in the USA.
• ‘Dong xuan’ means ‘frozen garlic’ in China but ‘winning an election’ in Taiwan.
• Only 3 nation states in the world do not allow divorce: Malta, the Philippines, and the Vatican.
– “News Magazine”


1964 [47] Wynonna Judd (Christina Ciminella), Ashland KY, country singer (“To Be Loved By You”, “No One Else on Earth”/5 Grammy Awards with mom Naomi as The Judds (“Love Can Build a Bridge”, “Rockin’ With The Rhythm Of the Rain”)/sister of actress Ashley Judd

1964 [47] Tom Morello, Harlem NY, rock guitarist (Audioslave-“Doesn’t Remind Me”, Rage Against the Machine-“Guerrilla Radio”)/aka The Nightwatchman

1971 [40] Patrick Dahlheimer, York PA, alt-rock bassist (Live-“Turn My Head”, “Lightning Crashes”)

1974 [37] Cee-Lo Green (Thomas Callaway), Atlanta GA, rapper/vocalist/songwriter/producer (“F— You”, Gnarls Barkley-“Crazy”, Goodie Mob-“Cell Therapy”)/TV personality (“The Voice” 2011)

• “Joan of Arc Feast Day” in France, honoring the ‘Maid of Orleans’ who was condemned as a heretic and burned at the stake at age 19 in the year 1431. To celebrate, grill a steak!

• “Memorial Day”, a national holiday observed on the last Monday in May in America, as a day of remembrance for those who have died in the nation’s service.

• “Water a Flower Day”, because nourishing a little bit of natural beauty might be the only truly worthwhile thing you do all day.

1996 [15] After a 10-year stint with Mary Hart, John Tesh co-anchors his last edition of TV’s “Entertainment Tonight” before pursuing a career as a New Age music composer, and eventually syndicated radio personality

2008 [03] “Sex & The City: The Movie” opens in theaters

2008 [03] Charlie Sheen weds Brooke Mueller (that marriage goes about as well as the one to Denise Richards)

1981 [30] The ‘Compact Disc’ (CD) is introduced (and the 1st consumer pitches a fit trying to open the shrinkwrap)

1911 [100] 1st “Indianapolis 500” auto race (Ray Harroun wins with an average speed of 74.59 mph)

1927 [84] Toronto attorney Charles Miller dies and sets off the ‘Stork Derby’, willing his $568,000 estate to the woman who births the most children over the next 10 years (4 women split the purse in 1937, having produced 9 kids apiece)

1979 [32] Ted Coombs begins a successful 5,193-mile roller-skate from Los Angeles to NYC

[Tues] World No-Tobacco Day
[Tues] Macaroon Day
[Tues] Save Your Hearing Day
[Tues] Speak In Complete Sentences Day
[Wed] Partial Solar Eclipse (eastern Asia, northern North America)
[Wed] Say Something Nice Day
This Week is … Old-Time Player Piano Week
This Month Is … Teen Self-Esteem Month


A highlight bit culled from 18 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
• Back swing takes out your golf bag.
• Slice hits big goon named ‘Moose’ next to you.
• Taking a divot out of the plastic mat.
• 50 tries at the ball-pickup tractor and not a single hit!
• Rubber tee … 300 yards. Golf ball … 5 yards.
– First published in “BS” 1994

I worship the ground that awaits you.

You’re a mama rabbit about to deliver. How will you line your new baby’s nest?
a. By gathering feathers in the woods.
b. By pulling out your own fur. [CORRECT]
c. By pulling out your mate’s fur.

Who’s the best boss you ever had and why?

Today’s Question: According to a recent survey, the average person does THIS 5 times a week.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Recites a famous movie line. (Frankly, we don’t give a damn.)

Kindness is like a boomerang … it always comes back.

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