Thursday, May 31, 2012        Edition: #4755

Monthly Planning Calendar in Today’s BS!

Famous felon Lindsay Lohan’s disastrous recent “Saturday Night Live” (NBC) performance was due to prescription drugs, her dysfunctional father Michael Lohan now claims (well if anyone knows pills, it’d be he) . . . Meantime, Lohan’s dysfunctional mother, Dina, is shooting her own reality TV show this Summer, “DramaMamas”, about parents who try to help their kids make it in show biz (so far, no network has bought into it) . . . A rep for sometime actress Tara Reid (“American Pie” and, more recently, “American Pie”) has dismissed reports the 36-year-old is dating a 60-year-old jeweler (apparently it’s a straight-up exchange of goods for services) . . . 55-year-old actress Kim Cattrall, best known for her role as sex-crazed ‘Samantha’ on “Sex & The City”, is dating 60-year-old NYC artist Clifford Ross, who is described as ‘extraordinarily wealthy’ (even better, it’s old money) . . . Former Boomtown Rates frontman Bob Geldof tells London’s “Evening Standard” that organizing the 1985 charity super-gig “Live Aid” ended up ruining his career (is one hit a ‘career’?) . . . Talent-free celebs Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton are still said to be feuding, but sources say that Kardashian couldn’t care less (funny, neither could we) . . . And 24-year-old actress Blake Lively says her soon-to-end series “Gossip Girl” (CW) is not representative of her ‘best quality of work’ (no, her best ‘work’ seems to be landing Hollywood leading men).


• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Dr Dog (“Be the Void”). Rerun.
• “Duets” (ABC) – Robin Thicke, Sugarland’s Jennifer Nettles, John Legend, and Kelly Clarkson perform classic duets with their handpicked partners.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Adam Levine (Maroon 5).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Gavin DeGraw (“Sweeter”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Rachael Yamagata (“Elephants … Teeth Sinking Into Heart”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – AWOLNATION (“Megalithic Symphony”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – Macy Gray (“Covered”). Rerun.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Blake Shelton (“The Voice”); K’Naan f/Nelly Furtado (“Is Anybody Out There?”). Rerun.


• Elton John – His partner David Furnish says Elton is ‘doing extremely well’ after suffering a respiratory infection which resulted in him being admitted to hospital. Speaking at the “Glamour” magazine ‘Women Of the Year Awards” in London, he thanked the audience for their concern. Furnish was there to hand out an award to fashion designer Donatella Versace. (‘Largest Lips’?)
• Elvis Presley – The crypt in which his body was first laid to rest before being moved to Graceland mansion is set to go under the hammer in late June by Julien’s Auctions. The tomb is located inside a mausoleum at the Forest Hill Cemetery in Memphis, Tennessee. Bidding begins at $100,000. (DNA included?)
• Madonna – Tonight the 53-year-old’s “2012 MDNA World Tour” begins at Ramat Gan Stadium in Tel Aviv, her first tour in 3 years. After Israel, the trek moves on to Europe, North & South America, and Australia, where she has not performed for 20 years. The entire tour will end up with close to 90 shows, the most ever for Madonna.
• Maroon 5 – Adam Levine tells “Details” magazine he signed up as a judge on NBC-TV’s “The Voice” to overcome his reputation as ‘a bimbo who dated pretty girls’. Quote: “People now know that I have a brain.” (Well …)
• Michael Bublé – He tells “ET Canada” that he enjoys Skype ‘dates’ with his wife because, thanks to touring, he hasn’t seen model Luisana Lopilato for several months. (Uh, spare us the details.)
• Mumford & Sons – This August they’re staging a series of ‘Gentlemen Of the Road Stopovers’ in 4 smaller towns across America. These one-day, outdoor events will features a concert followed by a celebration of local people, food, and music. The band says the ‘Stopover’ concept is inspired by Colorado’s Telluride Bluegrass and Scotland’s Loopallu festivals.
• No Doubt – A Los Angeles Superior Court has given permission for their lawsuit against a videogame-maker to go to trial later this year. The 2009 suit accuses Activision of ‘exceeding their contractual likenesses’ in the game “Band Hero”, thereby turning them into a ‘virtual karaoke circus act’. (Well …)
• Rihanna – Her latest rumored boyfriend is New York Knicks basketball player JR Smith. They reportedly spent time together in Miami Beach last weekend, and an insider claims they are definitely ‘hanging out’. (Guys are like multiple vitamins to her … one a day.)


A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “CBGB” – This upcoming film about the legendary NYC nightclub will feature Malin Akerman (“Rock Of Ages”) as Blondie singer Debbie Harry; actors Joel David Moore and Julian Acosta as Joey & Johnny Ramone; and Rupert Grint (“Harry Potter” films) as Dead Boys guitarist Cheetah Chrome. Alan Rickman was previously announced to play CBGB owner Hilly Kristal.
• “Dead Man Down” – This upcoming action thriller is slated to star Colin Farrell, Noomi Rapace, and Dominic Cooper. The movie tells the tale of a grieving husband who infiltrates the gang responsible for the deaths of those close to him, plus the disappearance of a young woman. Shooting is set to begin any day now.
• “Lore – 6’-5” actor Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson is set to play a man in charge of a group of mythological creatures in this bigscreen adaptation of the Ashley Wood graphic novel. Johnson’s character is charged with keeping a group of creatures at bay and keeping humanity safe from them.
• “World War Z” – Paramount Pictures has decided Brad Pitt’s upcoming, post-apocalyptic zombie-fest will have its release date pushed back another 6 months, from the slated December 21st 2012 release to June 21st 2013. The film revolves around a UN employee who is racing against time as he travels the world trying to stop the outbreak of a deadly Zombie pandemic.
• “The X Files 3” – Screenwriter Frank Spotnitz is urging Fox to greenlight a 3rd installment of the sci-fi TV series that was made into a 1998 movie and a sequel a decade later. “X Files” stars David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson have already said they’d love to play FBI agents ‘Mulder’ and ‘Scully’ again, but so far there’s no official greenlight to make the series into a trilogy.


A new University of Pennsylvania study has found that competitive eaters have unusual stomachs that work more like an expanding balloon rather than a squeezing sac. Even when empty, most people’s stomachs make wavelike muscular contractions called peristalsis. But competitive eaters display almost no peristalsis at all. In an experiment, a regular eater had to stop eating after 7 dogs – his stomach was full. A pro-eater, however, was still going strong after 36 hot dogs. His stomach had stretched to the point that it took up most of his upper abdomen, and still there wasn’t much peristalsis. (The next day though …)


One of Asia’s poorest nations has one of the latest hi-tech restaurants. ‘Coffee Room’, a café in Phnom Penh, Cambodia, recently introduced electronic menus that allow customers to place orders, call a server to the table, and ask for the bill simply by touching a tablet computer. Diners can also type in how they want food and drinks prepared, read ingredients, and use the tablets to access Facebook, Skype, or Twitter after ordering. The e-menus were developed to simplify the dining experience for expatriates who don’t speak the local language. (More dignified than ordering by mimicking a chicken.)
– “Christian Science Monitor”


Prison officials in Wuhan, central China, have started their own awards show for inmates to help them feel better about themselves. Convicts at the high-security Hubei jail are given prizes for obeying the rules, having the tidiest cell, good grades in education, and helping other prisoners. Jail staff hand out the awards in an Olympic Games-style ceremony. Officials say it’s good for morale because it gives inmates something to aim for and shows them that hard work gets results. (“And the award for best drag outfit at the annual block party goes to …”)


• Certain wasps have a remarkable ability to recognize the faces of other wasps. (“Leonard? It’s me, Sam!”)
• The US Postal Service still uses mule trains to reach some remote post offices, such as Supai, Arizona. (Home to 2 snails and a bag of rocks.)
– “Magazine Monitor”


1930 [82] Clint Eastwood, San Francisco CA, movie director (Oscars-“Million Dollar Baby”, “Unforgiven”)/movie actor (“In the Line of Fire”, “The Bridges of Madison County”)

1965 [47] Brooke Shields, NYC, model/movie actress (“The Blue Lagoon”)/author (“Down Came the Rain”)/former TV actress (“Lipstick Jungle” 2008-09, “Suddenly Susan” 1996-2000)

1966 [46] Jeremy Hotz, Cape Town, South Africa, stand-up comedian (“What a Miserable DVD This Is”)

1967 [45] Phil Keoghan, Lincoln, New Zealand, TV personality (“The Amazing Race” since 2001, “No Opportunity Wasted” 2004-07)

1972 [40] Archie Panjabi, London UK, TV actress (‘Kalinda Sharma’ on the “The Good Wife” since 2009)/movie actress (“Bend It Like Beckham”)

1976 [36] Colin Farrell, Dublin, Ireland, movie actor (“In Bruges”, “Miami Vice”)  UP NEXT: Stars in a remake of “Total Recall” (opening August 3rd).

1980 [32] Andy Hurley, Menomonee Falls WI, rock drummer (Fall Out Boy–“Thnks fr th Mmrs”, “I Don’t Care”)


• “Macaroon Day”, honoring those ooey-gooey coconut cookies that stick to your fillings. (A red letter day for dentists everywhere!)

• “Save Your Hearing Day”. I SAID, TODAY IS “SAVE YOUR HEARING DAY” … if you’d turn down your iPod you’d be able to … oh, never mind.

• “Speak In Complete Sentences Day”, a day to fine-tune your oral English composition. Good idea? Bad?

• “World No-Tobacco Day”, as declared by the UN’s World Health Organization to encourage people to kick their butts.


2000 [12] “Survivor” TV reality series debuts as a 3-month Summer show on CBS-TV (Richard, Rudy, Susan, Sean, Colleen, Kelly, Greg, and Gervase quickly become household names as do the tribes ‘Tagi’ and ‘Pagong’)


1998 [14] Ginger Spice (Geri Halliwell) announces she’s leaving the Spice Girls (they continue on as a foursome before splitting in 2000)


1997 [15] Ila Borders becomes 1st female pitcher in a Minor League Baseball game, as she enters a game in relief for the St Paul Saints (she could actually throw strikes and went on to pitch in the Northern League for 3 years)


1976 [36] Guinness Record ‘Loudest Concert’ as The Who put out a total of 76,000 watts of power at 120 decibels (no wonder it’s “Save Your Hearing Day” … Pete Townshend should be poster boy!)


[Jun 1] “Battlefield America”; “For Greater Glory”; “Piranha 3DD”; “Snow White & The Huntsman” open in movie theaters / Go Barefoot Day / Doughnut Day / Heimlich Maneuver Day / Positive Power of Humor & Creativity Day / Say Something Nice Day / Stand For Children Day / Leave the Office Early Day
[Jun 2] Queen’s Diamond Jubilee begins (UK) / Bubba Day / Cancer Survivors Day / National Running Day / Yell Fudge At the Cobras in North America Day / Drawing Day / National Trails Day
[Jun 3] MTV Movie Awards / Children’s Awareness Memorial Day
[Jun 4] Full Moon / Audacity to Hope Day / Do-Dah Day / International Day of Innocent Children Victims of Aggression
[Jun 5] Hot Air Balloon Day / World Environment Day
[Jun 6] CMT Music Awards / D-Day / Drive-in Movie Day / Tailors Day
[Jun 7] 2012 CMA Music Festival begins (Nashville) / VCR Day / “The Choice” premieres (FOX)
[Jun 8] “Madagascar 3: Europe’s Most Wanted”; “Prometheus” open in movie theaters / Banana Split Day / World Ocean Day / 2012 Download Festival begins (UK)
[Jun 9] Belmont Stakes (Queens NY) / International Young Eagles Day / The Wicket World of Croquet Day
[Jun 10] 66th Tony Awards (NYC) / Abused Women & Children’s Awareness Day / AA Day / Ball Point Pen Day / Children’s Sunday / Iced Tea Day / World Wind Day
[Jun 11] Corn On the Cob Day
[Jun 12] Crowded Nest Awareness Day / Peanut Butter Cookie Day
[Jun 13] Queen’s Official Birthday (UK)
[Jun 14] Career Nurse Assistants Day / World Blood Donor Day / Family History Day
[Jun 15] “Rock of Ages”; “That’s My Boy” open in movie theaters / Nature Photography Day / Flip Flop Day / Work @ Home Fathers Day / World Elder Abuse Awareness Day
[Jun 16] Fudge Day / World Juggling Day
[Jun 17] Fathers Day / Husband Caregiver Day / Family Awareness Day / World Day to Combat Desertification & Drought
[Jun 18] Ride Your Motorcycle to Work Day / International Sushi Day
[Jun 19] World Sickle Cell Day / World Sauntering Day
[Jun 20]  2012 NHL Awards (Las Vegas) / Rolling Stones 50th anniversary / World Refugee Day / Summer Solstice / Daylight Appreciation Day
[Jun 21] Atheists Solidarity Day / Go Skateboarding Day / Recess at Work Day / World Handshake Day / World Humanist Day
[Jun 22] “Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter”; “Brave”; “Seeking a Friend For the End Of the World” open in movie theaters / Stupid Guy Thing Day / Take Your Dog to Work Day / Ugliest Dog Day
[Jun 23] Baby Boomers Recognition Day / Backyard Campout Day / Let It Go Day / Pink Flamingo Day / Public Service Day
[Jun 24] Descendants Day / Celebration Of the Senses / International Fairy Day / Log Cabin Day
[Jun 25] Please Take My Children to Work Day
[Jun 26] International Day Against Drug Abuse & Illicit Trafficking / International Day in Support of Victims of Torture / Columnists Day
[Jun 27] Decide to Be Married Day / Happy Birthday to You Day / Industrial Workers Of the World Day / HIV Testing Day
[Jun 28] “Anger Management” premieres (FX) / Handshake Day / Dump the Pump Day / Bomb Pop Day
[Jun 29] “Magic Mike”; “People Like Us”; “Ted”; “Madea’s Witness Protection” open in movie theaters
[Jun 30] National Organization For Women Day / Tour de France begins


This week iconic musician and modern-day bard Bob Dylan received the Presidential Medal of Freedom, America’s highest civilian honor. A good excuse to play the exciting game …
• ‘There is a house in New Orleans they call the Rising Sun.’ [Dylan. “House Of the Rising Sun”]
• ‘It’s burned to a crisp with all our heart!’ [Japanese food. Batard bread.]
• ‘I see you’ve got your brand-new leopard skin pillbox hat!’ [Dylan. “Leopard Skin Pillbox Hat”]
• ‘Anytime, anywhere, just like your friend.’ [Japanese food. No-Brand Orange Punch.]
• ‘We’re going all the way until the wheels fall off and burn.’ [Dylan. “Brownsville Girl”]
• ‘You might like to drink whiskey! Might like to drink milk! You might like to eat caviar!’ [Dylan. “Gotta Serve Somebody”]
• ‘The sentimental taste is cozy for the heroines in the town.’ [Japanese food. Koedastick candy.]
• ‘My mind was relaxed by attaching importance to the tradition.’ [Japanese food. Izumiya Confectionary Co.]
• ‘You’ve got all the love, honey baby, I can stand!’ [Dylan. “Buckets of Rain”]
• ‘Relieve the relief and listen to the angel’s whisper.’ [Japanese food. Angel Relief cookies.]
– Thanks to Kim McCann.


☎ What words, terms, and phrases can you think of that didn’t exist when you were a kid?


US president Barack Obama’s re-election campaign has taken merchandising to a new level with an online store full of more than 200 items from kitchenware to designer clothes featuring the Obama imprimatur. (The “I Meow for Michelle” cat collar, for instance is just $12.)
– “Times of London”


Why don’t I fly? There are more planes in the ocean than ships in the sky.


You’ve just heard a ‘scroop’. What did you hear?
a. The mating call of a moose.
b. The rustle of silk. [CORRECT]
c. A phlegm-filled cough.
– “Webster’s Dictionary”


Question: THIS is the color most likely to cause you to lose energy and feel tired.
Answer: Pink.


What you are, not what you have, is what makes you rich.

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