Tuesday, May 5, 2015        Edition: #5444


★ 37-year-old Amal Clooney is buying her hubby George a $200,000 car for his birthday. The human rights lawyer has reportedly selected a Porsche 911 GT3 RS as an extra special gift for her husband to celebrate his 54th birthday on Wednesday. An insider reveals: ”Amal has been looking for the right car for him to replace his black Porsche 911 and the new one is much faster.” Amal has also wrapped up a state-of-the-art blender because George is apparently ‘obsessed’ with making smoothies. Hey, George … surprise!
– “Daily Mirror”
★ Former “Desperate Housewives” star Eva Longoria is on the new ’50 Most Beautiful List’ in the new edition of Spanish-language entertainment magazine “People en Espanol”. She and Puerto Rican heartthrob singer Chayanne grace the cover. Also on the 2015 list: “Modern Family” actress Sofia Vergara, reggaeton singer Daddy Yankee, Cuban-American actor William Levy (“Dancing With the Stars”), “Shower” singer Becky G, and “Orange Is the New Black” actress Dascha Polanco (‘Dayanara Diaz’). The celebs who made the list will be fêted at a NYC gala May 12th.
– WENN.com
★ And Bruce Jenner has reportedly sacked Kris Jenner as his manager. The 65-year-old reality star has cut his ex-wife out of the deal for his upcoming TV show which will document his gender transition. The move has reportedly angered the mother-of-six who has looked after his career since the beginning of “Keeping Up With the Kardashians” in 2007. The decision for Bruce to find a new manager comes just a week after E! announced it had snapped up the show chronicling Bruce’s transition, which will be an 8-part series airing this Summer.
– “The Sun”

• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Best Coast (“California Nights”).
• “Daily Show With Jon Stewart” (Comedy Central/CTV) – Willie Nelson (“Django & Jimmie”).
• “Dancing With the Stars” (ABC/CTV2) – Josh Groban performs; Carly Rae Jepsen performs; a double elimination.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Jamie Foxx (“Hollywood”, out May 18th).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Imagine Dragons (“Smoke & Mirrors”).
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/Omni 1) – OK Go (“Hungry Ghosts”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/Omni1) – Mumford & Sons (“Wilder Mind”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Fetty Wap (“Zoo Style”).
• “The Voice” (NBC/CTV2) – 1 contestant is voted off; the remaining 5 go to the next level.

• Blur – Their 1st new studio album in 12 years, “The Magic Whip”, has shot to the very top of the UK album chart.
• Chris Isaak – He and Brit singer James Blunt are joining the judging panel of Australia’s “The X Factor”, replacing Irish singer Ronan Keating and rapper Redfoo. They will be joined by Aussie singer Guy Sebastian and the only remaining judge from last year, Dannii Minogue.
• Kanye West – He announced in March the follow-up to his critically acclaimed album “Yeezus” would be titled “So Help Me God”. But after social media backlash he’s decided on a change of direction. Quote: “I’m changing my album name to “Swish” … I might change it again, but that’s the name now.” He’s yet to confirm a release date.
• Sammy Hagar – The former Van Halen frontman has teamed up with the Starkey Hearing Foundation to urge young fans to turn the music down in order to avoid hearing loss.
• Shelby Lynne – Today the country veteran releases her 13th full-length album, “I Can’t Imagine”. Comprising 10 new songs written or co-written by Lynne, the disc is said to reflect her various influences: Southern soul, Crescent City R&B, and California country & western.
• Taylor Swift – Tonight & tomorrow her “1989 World Tour” begins at the Tokyo Dome in Tokyo, Japan. She’s announced that Haim will open for 7 of her North American dates this Summer. The North American leg begins Friday, May 15th at Rock in Rio USA in Las Vegas.
• Willie Nelson – Today the 82-year-old is releasing his memoir, “It’s a Long Story: My Life”. He has a busy Summer ahead of him; in addition to his tour dates with Alison Krauss, he’s filming the fantasy adventure movie “Waiting For the Miracle to Come”.

Out today on DVD, Netflix, Google Play and/or other video providers …
• “Black or White” ( PG-13 Drama ): Kevin Costner stars as a grieving widower who is drawn into a custody battle over his granddaughter, whom he helped raise her entire life. When her paternal grandmother (Octavia Spencer) seeks custody with the help of her brother (Anthony Mackie), the little girl is torn between two families who love her deeply. Co-stars Gillian Jacobs.
• “Black Sea” ( R-Rated  Adventure Thriller ): In order to make good with his former employers, a submarine captain takes a job with a shadowy backer to search the depths of the Black Sea for a sunken submarine rumored to be loaded with gold. Stars Jude Law, Scoot McNairy, Ben Mendelsohn, David Threlfall.
• “Mr Turner” ( R-Rated Bio-Drama ): An exploration of the life of eccentric 19th-century British painter JMW Turner as he travels, paints, stays with the country aristocracy, visits brothels, and is both celebrated and reviled by the public and by royalty. Stars Timothy Spall, Paul Jesson., Dorothy Atkinson.
• “Selma” ( PG-13 Historical Drama ): A dramatic portrayal of civil rights advocate Martin Luther King Jr and the marches of Selma, Alabama that changed the United States for ever. Stars David Oyelowo, Carmen Ejogo, Tim Roth, Lorraine Toussaint. Directed by Ava DuVernay. Produced by Oprah Winfrey.
• Also released today: “The Bridge: Season 2” (TV); “Broadchurch: The Complete 2nd Season” (TV); “Children’s Classics Collection” (Compilation); “Frank Sinatra: 5 Film Collection” (Compilation); “Halt & Catch Fire: The Complete 1st Season” (TV); “Hating Obama” (Documentary); “Mad Max Collector’s Edition” (Compilation); “Masterpiece: Mr Selfridge Season 3” (TV); “Masters of Sex: Season 2” (TV); “Pitch Perfect Sing-Along Aca-Awesome Edition” (Re-Release); “Sesame Street: Elmo The Musical Volume 2: Learn & Imagine” (Kids TV); and “White Collar: The Complete Collection” (TV).

Experts advise against these stupid money moves …
✗ Expensive Weddings – A recent study reveals couples now spend an average of $31,213 just to begin their marriages … not including the honeymoon.
✗ Buying McMansions – Most would agree becoming ‘house poor’ is a costly mistake. But still, 43% say their dream home is ‘somewhat’ or ‘much’ larger than their current residence.
✗ Fancy Wheels – Instead of becoming infatuated with the latest auto trend, recognize the value of lower payments on a dependable used car that allows you to reduce interest costs.
✗ Refusing to Invest – Nearly half of people surveyed are placing virtually nothing aside for the future. Overall, fewer than 1-in-4 are saving more than 10% of income.
✗ Payday Loans – These last-resort loans have become so popular, millions of people are trapped in a cycle of paying up to 400% interest to cash in their paycheck ahead of time.
– CheatSheet.com

Microsoft was reportedly ‘shocked’ when an age-guessing tool it put online went viral. ‘How-Old.net’ was created to test out new face-detection apps Microsoft recently released. Users on the site can watch the new technology guess the age of people in pre-canned stock photos .. at least, that’s what the developers thought they’d do. But no, the more popular choice is for users to upload their own images in order to find out what age they themselves appear to be. Part of the reason the tool seems to have become so popular is that it’s not very accurate. (Nothing makes people feel better than being mistaken for a person 10 years younger.)
NET: http://how-old.net/#
– Slate.com

Just what we need, something that makes it easier to text and drive! The ‘RayGo’ lets you keep your hands on the wheel and your eyes on the road while texting, talking, or even Facebooking. It’s a navigation control that mounts to your steering wheel and connects to your smartphone to interact with your favorite functions via voice. The gizmo’s ‘Drive Mode’ works with Gmail, Facebook Messenger, and WhatsApp, just to name a few. Simply press on the 5-way control with your thumb and listen as the ‘RayGo’ voice provides options. The Israeli-designed device was originally designed as a way to give vision-impaired people full access to their smartphones. The gadget is selling for $55 on Indiegogo. (Funeral charges extra.)
– Ozy.com

Just in time for Mothers Day this Sunday …
• 67% of mothers say they usually receive a purchased card for “Mothers Day” and 57% get a purchased gift, but 43% say spending time with their kids is what’s really at the top of their wish list.
– “Hallmark Magazine”
• A survey comparing Mothers Day to Fathers Day finds we spend 14% more on moms; moms get 37% more greeting cards; 39% more adults eat out on Mothers Day; and there are 13% more phone calls on Mothers Day.
– “Menstuff”


1948 [67] Bill Ward, Birmingham UK, rock drummer (Black Sabbath-“Reunion”, “Heaven & Hell”)  BS FACTOID: An ongoing feud with Ozzy Osbourne leaves his participation in the upcoming Black Sabbath farewell tour in doubt.

1959 [56] Brian Williams, Elmira NY, suspended TV news anchor (“NBC Nightly News” since 2004)  BS FACTOID: After an investigation into the integrity of his reporting, inside sources say his return to NBC-TV is not likely.

1983 [32] Henry Cavill, Saint Saviour, Jersey, Channel Islands, movie actor (“Man of Steel”)/TV actor (”The Tudors” 2007-10)  COMING UP: “The Man from UNCLE” (August 14th); “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” (2016).

1988 [27] Adele (Adkins), Enfield UK, soul singer-songwriter (“Someone Like You”, “Rolling In the Deep”)

1989 [26] Chris Brown, Tappahannock VA, R&B/hip-hop singer (“Loyal”, “Run It”)/former Rihanna abuser

• “Cartoonists Day”, kicking off “Cartoon Art Appreciation Week”, to create greater public awareness of and appreciation for the cartoon. Why today? “The Yellow Kid”, the first newspaper comic strip, was first published on this day 120 years ago (1895).

• “Childhood Depression Awareness Day”, initiated by the National Mental Health Association in 1997.

• “Cinco de Mayo”, a Mexican holiday commemorating the 1862 victory over French troops at the Battle of Puebla. Mexicans everywhere celebrate with parades and fiestas. That’s likely the reason today is also called “Totally Chipotle Day”, a celebration of the smoked jalapeno pepper.

• “Hoagie Day”, celebrating the super-sized sandwich also known as a sub, grinder, hero, Italian sandwich, po’ boy, wedge, zeppelin, or torpedo. What’s the best combo?

• “International Midwives Day”, observed since 1991 in over 50 nations worldwide to recognize and honor these healthcare professionals who are experts in women’s reproductive health.
NET: http://mana.org/IntMidDay.html

• “Oyster Day”, celebrating the mollusk delicacy enjoyed by many. (What brave soul could have first decided to eat one of these things?)

2002 [13] Movie producer Michael Todd Jr, who made the only feature film in ‘Smell-o-Vision’ (1960’s “Scent of Mystery”), dies in Ireland at age 72

2006 [09] “Mission: Impossible III”, starring Tom Cruise and the late Philip Seymour Hoffman as the bad guy, opens in movie theaters

1999 [16] Garth Brooks is named ‘Artist Of the Decade’ at the “Academy of Country Music Awards” (“The Garth Brooks World Tour w/Trisha Yearwood” continues this week at CenturyLink Center in Omaha NE Thursday-through-Sunday)

2002 [13] “Spider-Man” becomes the 1st movie to top $100 million in its opening weekend (“Avengers: Age of Ultron” just topped $187 million)

2007 [08] Floyd Mayweather Jr out-points Oscar De La Hoya to claim the WBC super welterweight title with a split decision in Las Vegas (on this date in 2012 he defeats Miguel Cotto to maintain his WBA junior middleweight title)

2004 [11] Picasso’s 1905 painting “Boy With a Pipe” sells for $104 million at Sotheby’s in NYC, setting a new record for an auctioned painting

[Wed] Bike to School Day
[Wed] No Diet Day
[Wed] School Nurse Day
[Thurs] Children’s Mental Health Awareness Day
[Fri] No Socks Day
[Fri] Rock In Rio USA rock weekend begins (Las Vegas NV)
[Fri] “Hot Pursuit” opens in movie theaters
This Week Is … Life Coach Recognition Week
This Month Is … Motorcycle Safety Month


✓ Reduces stress.
✓ Leads to more honest communications.
✓ Reduces complaints about low pay.
✓ Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear.
✓ Encourages carpooling … or at least a DD.
✓ Increases job satisfaction because employees just don’t give a crap anymore.
✓ Eliminates vacations as people would rather come to work.
✓ Makes fellow employees look better.
✓ Makes cafeteria food taste better.
✓ It’s an incentive to show up.
– Adapted from FunnyLists.net

What annoying little thing has gotten your day off to a bad start? How about …
✗ Some idiot trying to find exact change. Picking through your pocket lint for 15¢ isn’t helping the Barista churn through the morning rush any faster.
✗ Co-workers who mark all their email ‘high priority’. Just because Bill Gates invented the button doesn’t men you have to use it. Pick up the phone.

76 years ago today (1939), 1,904-pound ‘Big Boy’ set the record as the world’s largest what?
a. Pig. [CORRECT. ‘BB’ was a real porker.]
b. Ham.
c. Hamburger.
– AnswersUniverse.com

Here I am! What are your other two wishes?

Question: If you are average, you open THIS 12 times each day.
Answer: Your refrigerator.

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

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