Friday, May 8, 2015        Edition: #5447

Bull Works!

★ The Broadway musical adaptation of “Doctor Zhivago” is set to close just weeks after its official opening. The epic romance, based on the 1957 Boris Pasternak novel and the 1965 Oscar-winning film, began previews in March after being in development for almost 8 years. However, due to poor box office sales and scathing reviews, the production closes on Sunday after only 26 previews and 23 proper shows at NYC’s Broadway Theatre. (This may be one of Broadway’s greatest musical flops, which would make Bono feel a lot better.)
★ Actor Theo James is the new face of fashion house Hugo Boss. The “Divergent” star has been signed as an ambassador for the brand’s fragrances and has already starred in his first ad campaign for the label which is set for release in September. The 30-year-old – who was recently spotted filming a commercial for Boss’ new scent in NYC – says he is ‘honored’ to have been asked to represent the brand in his first major spokesperson deal. (BS translation: Gotta love this frickin’ easy money!)
★ And 17-year-old famous thing Kylie Jenner has finally admitted she uses temporary lip fillers. In a clip from an upcoming episode of “Keeping Up With the Kardashians” (E!), Jenner reveals her bee-stung pout is far from natural. Fans have suspected she’s had enhancements for months after she posted photos to social media showing dramatically fuller lips. Quote: “I wanted to admit to the lips, but people are so quick to judge me on everything.” (In other momentous news, still no cure for cancer.)
– Postmedia Network

• “BAFTA TV Awards” (BBC 1) – Sunday night in London “The Good Wife”, “House Of Cards”, “Orange Is the New Black”, and “True Detective” battle it out for ‘Best International TV Show’. Benedict Cumberbatch has a 3rd ‘Leading Actor’ nomination for “Sherlock”. New “Late Late Show” host James Corden is nominated for writing/starring in the comedy “The Wrong Mans”.
• Big Guava (Tampa FL) – Tonight & tomorrow alt-rock and EDM acts perform on 4 stages. Headliners are Awolnation, Passion Pit, Pretty Lights, The Strokes, and TV On the Radio.
• “iHeartRadio Album Release Party with Mumford & Sons” (Yahoo Live) – Today’s celebration of the group’s 3rd studio album, “Wilder Mind” (released this Monday), features a live performance from NYC’s iHeartRadio Theater.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight Yelawolf f/Travis Barker (“Psycho White”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight Misterwives (“Our Own House”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/Omni 1) – Tonight Beck (“Morning Phase”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Tonight Arcade Fire drummer Jeremy Gara. Rerun.
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/Omni1) – Tonight Dave Matthews Band (“Away From the World”).
• “Live With Kelly & Michael” (syndicated/CTV) – Today Trisha Yearwood (“PrizeFighter: Hit After Hit”).
• “Meredith Vieira Show” (syndicated) – Today Jill Scott (“The Light Of the Sun”).
• “The Real” (syndicated) – Today Patti LaBelle (“Nightbirds”).
• Rock In Rio USA (Las Vegas NV) – Today the 1st weekend of the 1st-ever US edition of the festival gets underway with rock acts that include Deftones, Foster the People, Linkin Park, Metallica, No Doubt, The Pretty Reckless, and Rise Against. Nest week’s 2nd weekend features top pop acts. The original Rock in Rio in Brazil was staged in 1985.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC/Global) – Host Reese Witherspoon (“Hot Pursuit”); musical guest Florence + The Machine (“How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful”, out May 29th).
• Shaky Knees (Atlanta GA) – The 3rd annual 3-day indie rock, pop & folk festival includes Brand New, Interpol, The Pixies, The Strokes, Tame Impala, Wilco and many more.
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Tonight Boz Scaggs (“A Fool to Care”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Tonight U2 does a busking segment on the streets of NYC; Bono re-enacts his bicycle crash in Central Park.
• “The Voice” (NBC/CTV2) – Saturday the top 6 artists perform for the coaches. Rerun.

• Kenny Chesney – Saturday Eric Church joins his “Big Revival Tour” for a major stadium date at Lucas Oil Stadium in Indianapolis IN. Also on the bill: Brantley Gilbert, Chase Rice, and Old Dominion.
• Luke Bryan – His “That’s My Kind Of Night” tour just ended last night in Winnipeg MB and his all new “Kick the Dust Up Tour” begins tonight in Grand Forks ND. Randy Houser & Dustin Lynch are the opening acts. The schedule includes 7 stadiums and several multiple dates.
• Prince – He’s organized and is scheduled to perform at the Rally 4 Peace concert in Baltimore MD on Sunday to support those affected by the recent riots. He’s urging fans to wear gray to honor Freddie Gray, the 25-year-old who suffered fatal injuries in police custody last month.
• Rush – Tonight in Tulsa OK, the Canadian rock legends embark on a 34-date 40th anniversary tour. The trek runs through August 1st in Los Angeles CA.
• Seether – Their 3rd annual Rise Above Fest returns to Bangor ME on Saturday in support of SAVE (Suicide Awareness Voices of Education). The 2015 lineup includes All That Remains, Godsmack, Papa Roach, Slash f/Myles Kennedy & The Conspirators and more.
• Zac Brown Band – Their new album “Jekyll + Hyde” has debuted at #1 on the new ‘Billboard 200’ all-genre album chart. It’s their 3rd career chart-topper.

• “Hot Pursuit” ( PG-13 Action Comedy ): Reese Witherspoon plays an uptight and by-the-book cop who’s trying to protect a deceased drug boss’s widow (Sofia Vergara) as they race through Texas pursued by crooked cops and murderous gunmen. Oddly, the film is being released 28 years to the day after a 1987 John Cusack film with the same title but totally different storyline.
• Opening in limited release: “The D Train” (Comedy); “5 Flights Up” (Drama); “I Am Big Bird: The Caroll Spinney Story” (Documentary); “Maggie” (Horror Thriller); “Saint Laurent” (Bio-Drama); and “Skin Trade” (Crime Thriller).

• “Fifty Shades of Grey” ( Erotic Thriller Unrated Edition ): The uber-hyped bigscreen version of EL James’ BDSM-filled novel. Sam Taylor-Johnson directs Dakota Johnson as ‘Anastasia Steele’ and Jamie Dornan as the sadomasochistic anti-hero ‘Christian Grey’. Two sequels are in the works. The DVD/Blu-ray has 2 hours of bonus features plus an alternative ending.

Looking to minimize your carbon footprint from beyond the grave? If a Kickstarter campaign by Seattle WA-based Urban Death Project succeeds, you’ll be able to have your body disposed of in the most ecologically sustainable way possible … composting. The body is laid to rest atop a 3-story ‘core’ which contains material that facilitates decomposition, such as wood chips and sawdust. After 4-to-6 weeks the resulting nutrient-rich soil can then be used to create or add to local green space. Instead of a traditional headstone, family members are encouraged to plant a memorial tree or garden. The process is both far cheaper and far more environmentally friendly than traditional burials. (And you thought sheep manure fertilizer was gross.)

Incredibly, less than 1% of Sweden’s household waste winds up in landfills. Where’s the rest go? Roughly half is recycled, but what’s more interesting and lucrative is what happens to the other half. Of the 4.4 million tons of household waste Sweden produces each year, 2.2 million tons are converted into energy through an incineration process called Waste-To-Energy (WTE). But burning means smoke and other emissions, right? Swedish Waste Management suggests that’s the lesser of two evils as the landfill option means leaked methane and other greenhouse gasses. The country’s WTE system is so efficient, it actually imports garbage from other countries … nearly 800,000 tons a year. (Now Sweden’s famous for another kind of ‘Garbo’.)

A record 38 million people are currently displaced inside their own countries due to conflict and violence, according to new figures from the Norwegian Refugee Council. Democratic Republic of Congo, Iraq, Nigeria, South Sudan, and Syria have the most newly displaced people.
– BBC News

Microsoft has updated its “Office 2013” dictionary. It now recognizes “Game of Thrones” words like ‘Daenerys’ and ‘Tyrion’. But not ‘Dothraki’.


1953 [62] Alex Van Halen, Nijmegen, Netherlands, classic rock drummer (Van Halen-“Jump”)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (2007)/brother of guitarist Eddie Van Halen

1957 [58] Bill Cowher, Crafton PA, TV football analyst (“NFL Today on CBS”)/retired NFL coach (Pittsburgh Steelers 1992-2007)/Super Bowl 40 winner (2006)

1964 [51] Dave Rowntree, Colchester UK, rock drummer (Blur-“The Magic Whip”, released on April 27th)

1975 [40] Enrique Iglesias (Preysler), Madrid, Spain, pop/Latin singer (f/Pitbull-“I Like It”)

Oldies singer Billy Joel (“Just the Way You Are”) is 66; Classic rock bassist Tom Petersson (Cheap Trick) is 65; Electronica singer David Gahan (Depeche Mode) is 53; Rock singer Pierre Bouvier (Simple Plan) is 36; Movie actress Rosario Dawson (“Sin City: A Dame to Kill For”) is 36.

ESPN sportscaster Chris Berman (“SportsCenter”) is 60; Rock singer Bono (U2) is 55; TV actress Lindsey Shaw (“Pretty Little Liars”) is 26.

• “Animal Disaster Preparedness Day”, a day to figure out what you would do with your dog, cat, bird, horse, or livestock if your area was hit with a flood, earthquake, or forest fire.
• “Canadian Music Week”. It’s the wrap-up weekend of the annual music festival, conference, and exhibition in Toronto ON with thousands of music industry participants from around-the-world. Some 350 bands are showcased in 35 clubs over the 3 nights.
• “Child Care Provider Appreciation Day”, saluting the dedicated souls who interact with our children during the important formative years of their lives.
• “Fintastic Friday”, to raise awareness of the illegal mass killing and ‘finning’ of sharks that has caused the population to drop 75-to-90% in many ecosystems. Why? Shark Fin Soup.
• “Military Spouse Appreciation Day”, observed annually on the Friday before “Mothers Day” to recognize the courage of those holding down the homefront.
• “No Socks Day”, when we’re encouraged to avoid wearing socks to feel less encumbered and help the environment by creating less laundry.
• “VE Day Celebration”, as Queen Elizabeth II begins 3 days of festivities on the 70th anniversary of the end of WW2 in Europe by lighting the 1st of 100 ceremonial beacons. On Saturday evening, a free concert in central London includes performances by pop star Pixie Lott, veteran rockers Status Quo, and classical singer Katherine Jenkins among others.
• “World Red Cross Day”, celebrating the 1828 birth of Jean Henri Dunant in Geneva, Switzerland, founder of the International Red Cross/Red Crescent.

• “Babysitters Day”, observed on the Saturday before “Mothers Day” to give sitters appreciation and special recognition for their quality child care. Good luck finding one … it’s Saturday night!
• “Birthmothers Day”, observed annually on the Saturday before “Mothers Day” and dedicated to those who, for one reason or another, have put a child up for adoption.
• “Lost Sock Memorial Day”, a day to remember those singular hose that went into the washing machine or dryer never to return. What should we do, play “Taps” for them?
• “Miniature Golf Day”, celebrated the 2nd Saturday of May to salute the frustrating game that involves putting balls through windmills and into clown mouths. Miniature golf has been around since the 1800s when the Ladies’ Putting Club had a mini-course in St Andrews, Scotland.
• “International Migratory Bird Day”, observed annually on the 2nd Saturday in May.
• “Stay Up All Night Day”, an annual celebration for people under 40 … who can actually do it.
• “World Belly Dance Day”, annually on the 2nd Saturday of May to share the joy of dancing and help a charity.
• “World Fair Trade Day”, observed on the 2nd Saturday of May to promote improved working conditions and payment for workers and producers around-the-world.

• “Clean Up Your Room Day”. What, once a year? Were you born in a barn?
• “Mothers Day”, an annual salute to moms on the 2nd Sunday in May that’s now observed in some 60 countries, including Australia, Canada, El Salvador, Guatemala, Mexico, New Zealand, and the USA, where the modern version began.
• “Trust Your Intuition Day”, a day to listen to your ‘gut feelings’ and act upon them. Is it true … are women better at this than men?
• “World Lupus Day”, to create awareness of the potentially fatal auto-immune disease capable of damaging virtually any part of the body. 9-out-of-10 people with lupus are women.

2006 [09] After holding his breath underwater for 7 minutes at NYC’s Lincoln Center, illusionist David Blaine fails to break the world record by having to be pulled out by divers 2 minutes short

1987 [28] Canada’s 1-dollar coin is introduced (quickly nicknamed the ‘loonie’, due to its reverse side depiction of the Common Loon, a bird that’s well-known throughout the country)

2010 [05] At age 88, Betty White becomes oldest-ever host of “Saturday Night Live” (NBC)

[Mon] Eat What You Want Day
[Mon] Root Canal Appreciation Day
[Tues] International Nurses Day
[Tues] Limerick Day
[Wed] Cannes Film Festival opens (France)
[Wed] 3rd Shift Workers Day
[Wed] Receptionists Day
This Week Is … Flexible Work Arrangement Week
This Month Is … Hope Chest Month


• You regularly clean your kid’s face using ‘Mom spit’.
• You’re willing to kiss your child’s ‘boo-boo’ … regardless of where it is.
• Your idea of a good day is making it through without a child leaking any bodily fluids on you.
• You buy cereal with marshmallows in it.
• You have time to shave only one leg at a time.
• You find yourself cutting your husband’s sandwiches into cute little shapes.
• You hear your mother’s voice coming out of your mouth when you say, “NOT in your good clothes!”
• You donate to charities in the hope your child won’t get that disease.
• You hire a sitter because you haven’t been out with your husband in ages, then spend half the night checking on the kids.
• You stop criticizing the way your mother raised you.

☎ Hey, it’s Travel & Tourism Week. So finish this sentence: Travel is …

I’m one bad relationship away from having 30 cats …

Question: When asked “What talent do you wish you had?”, 15% of respondents said THIS.
Answer: Dancing.

Most people are about as happy as they make their minds up to be.

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