Wednesday, May 9, 2018 Edition: #6209

Get Your BS Here, Hot ‘n Fresh!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Russell Crowe has donated the money he received from comedian John Oliver in his divorce auction to an Australian facility which treats koalas with chlamydia. The British talk show host revealed in April that he spent a small fortune on the Gladiator star’s jockstrap and other items, and had donated the memorabilia to the last remaining Blockbuster DVD rental store in the U.S., in Anchorage, Alaska, to help it stay open. Crowe, who netted $3.7 million from the auction, said shortly afterwards that he was inspired by John’s “random act of kindness” and would be donating his money to a wildlife charity.
(I have to admit when I saw the words “comedian”, “and koalas with chlamydia” in the same sentence, I totally thought there was a joke coming!)
-Canoe
★ Robin Williams was struggling with a brain disorder that was not immediately diagnosed, causing many of the symptoms that sapped him of his vitality and ultimately led him to take his own life. That’s according to a new biography called “Robin” by Dave Itzkoff that’s out this month and details the final stages of Williams’s life. Williams was initially diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease, but his behaviors in his last year were uncharacteristic of that malady, leading some to blame drugs or alcohol for his problem. Finally, a neuropathologist correctly diagnosed his affliction: diffuse Lewy body dementia.
-MSN
★ Prince Charles must hold a major grudge because he’s reportedly ensured that Duchess Sarah Ferguson (AKA Fergie) won’t get an invite to the royal wedding reception. While Prince Andrew’s ex-wife IS invited to the wedding and general reception, she’s been left off the exclusive list for a second more private reception for just 250 people being thrown by Charles. And yes, Prince Andrew and the couple’s kids Princess Beatrice and Princess Eugenie did nab invites.
(Maybe it’s because of that awful version of the U.S. national anthem that she did. Wait. Wrong Fergie. Never Mind…)
★ Rick Moranis has been essentially retired from acting since 1997, but he’s about to make a rare TV appearance as one of his most beloved characters. Moranis is set to reprise the role of Dark Helmet from the Mel Brooks comedy “Spaceballs” on tonight’s episode of “The Goldbergs”. He’ll voice the classic Darth Vader spoof character in one of young Adam Goldberg’s dreams, battling the Schwartz – a parody of the Force – in his bedroom.
(And may the Schwartz be with him!)
-MSN
★ Kirsten Dunst and Jesse Plemons are the proud parents of a baby boy.  Dunst gave birth over the weekend, and a source says that everyone is doing great.  This is the first child for Dunst and her fiancé Plemons who met in 2016 on the set of the show “Fargo.”  They have since remained very private about their relationship and news of their engagement only became public when Dunst wore an engagement ring to the Golden Globes in 2017.
-TheBlast
★ Sylvester Stallone is heading back to the big screen as John Rambo for a fifth movie. Sly’s Vietnam vet character, who first appeared in 1982’s “First Blood”, will tackle Mexican crime bosses in his latest adventure. The film is expected to start shooting in September.
(And so is Rambo…excessively!)
-Canoe

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Alden Ehrenreich, Ben Falcone, 2 Chainz featuring YG and Offset
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Jennifer Lopez, Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Car Seat Headrest
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Gayle King, Anna Wintour
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Michelle Wolf, Zach Woods, Jessie Ware, Aaron Spears
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Heidi Klum, Zlatan Ibrahimavic, Alice Merton
• “Conan” (TBS/Comedy): Brian Posehn, James Veitch
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Ryan Serhant, Ramona Singer
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Jake Tapper
• “The Talk” (CBS): Gayle King
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Chadwick Boseman, Barenaked Ladies
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Rob Lowe, Jon Dorenbos
• “Survivor: Ghost Island” (CBS): A Giant Game of Bumper Cars
• “NBA Playoffs” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Philadelphia vs. Boston

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Adele – had a “Titanic” themed 30th birthday party on the weekend. She arrived looking startlingly similar to Kate Winslet’s character ‘Rose’ in the movie. The party featured a mock-up of the iconic staircase used in the film, a recreation of the classic below-deck party scene, and of course ended…with Adele singing ‘My Heart Will Go On.’
• Taylor Swift – played a private concert for 2,000 kids and families from the Arizona Association for Foster and Adoptive Parents. Then she enlisted some local Papa John’s locations to bake 500 large pizzas and deliver them in trucks for the afterparty.
• AC/DC – drummer Chris Slade is being coy on whether the rumors that the band are planning to record a new album with Axl Rose on vocals. In an interview he said…basically nothing: “My lips are sealed. And if I knew, I couldn’t say a word anyway. What I usually say is ‘If I tell you, I have to kill you.’ Which, perhaps, is not in good taste. I couldn’t even start to answer that, I’m afraid.” (And there you have it. The first time anything about AC/DC could be called “subtle”.)
• Phil Collins – has announced his first major North American tour in 12 years. The 15-date “Not Dead Yet, Live!” launches October 5th in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida and concludes October 28th in Los Angeles. The tour, titled after his 2016 memoir ‘Not Dead Yet’, is billed as a celebration of Collins’ career.
• Huey Lewis – the inner ear disorder that rendered him unable to perform has forced him to deal with the possibility that he may never be able to return to the stage. He’s suffering from Meniere’s disease, and says “I’m still hoping I’m gonna get better. They say a positive attitude is important.”
• Carrie Underwood – will serve as guest mentor to the five American Idol finalists on May 13. They’ll perform tunes from Carrie’s songbook, following a special mentoring session with her. Underwood will also perform her new single, ‘Cry Pretty’.
• Lady Antebellum – Charles Kelly and Dave Haywood shared their words of wisdom with the University of Georgia’s Class of 2018. The pair returned to their alma mater as commencement speakers, and they also performed…‘Georgia on My Mind’.

TOMB à la KING:
So now they are saying that there are no hidden rooms inside King Tut’s tomb. That’s after a British Egyptologist said in 2015, after analysis of high-definition laser scans, that Egyptian Queen Nefertiti’s tomb might be concealed behind wall paintings in the famed boy king’s burial chamber. The statement by Egypt’s antiquities ministry says an Italian team conducted extensive studies with ground-penetrating radar that showed King Tutankhamun’s tomb did not contain any hidden, man-made blocking walls as was earlier suspected. The ministry has been gradually moving King Tut’s belongings to a new museum outside Cairo near the Giza Pyramids to undergo restoration before they are put on display.
(***Caution: Dad joke*** I’d like to point that I also have no secret bodies in my room. So at least the King and I have Tutankhamun!)
-CBC, Gizmodo

A GOOD POINT:
British scientists have developed an injection that could help people lose 14 pounds in just four weeks. The jab mimics the effects of a gastric band and the breakthrough is being hailed as “the most exciting” obesity treatment yet. Human trials are currently being completed, but have so far found that patients naturally ate 30 percent less food after being given the hormone injection. It was initially believed that gastric band surgery worked by reducing the amount of food held in the stomach. But patients were also found to have elevated levels of satiety hormones and preferred to eat less-fatty foods, suggesting it also altered cravings. The new injection reproduces those hormones to mirror that effect — without the need for an operation. It was so successful in some patients with diabetes that they were able to come off their medication. Sir Steve Bloom, who lead the research, is hopeful the therapy will be available within five years as a painless monthly injection.
(It makes you feel full, does it? Challenge accepted!)
-NYPost

BAD HEALTH ADVICE GOING AROUND ON THE INTERNET:
Don’t try any of these before checking with a professional…and maybe not even then!
✗ Using dental floss to remove moles: Any mishaps could lead to dangerous infection or even kill skin tissue—both way more serious than any concerns about your appearance. (Only use floss for the reason it was invented: Sitting in your medicine cabinet.)
✗ Getting “flat abs” in 10 minutes: Countless Instagram posts, YouTube videos, and online articles promise to deliver a workout (in some cases just one exercise) that’ll give you a flat stomach in minutes a day. Can’t happen until you lose weight. (I see. It can’t happen!)
✗ Drinking charcoal to “detox”: Concentrated forms of charcoal, such as in a pill, can cause major gastrointestinal disturbances and may cause diarrhea, cramping and massive bloating. It can also leave you unable to absorb vitamins and minerals from food or benefit from medication.
✗ Washing your mouth out with oil: The claim is that swishing an expensive coconut oil around in your mouth—for 5-20 minutes!—will pull toxins from your gums and teeth. There’s absolutely no evidence that this is the case. It isn’t likely to hurt you, but experts say, it also won’t help you. (Darn you, Gwyneth Paltrow!)
✗ Sipping “raw” water: Untreated water can carry extremely dangerous pathogens including E. coli and cholera. (See ‘colon cleanse’, below!)
✗ Popping pimples the “right” way: Any dermatologist will tell you that you shouldn’t pop pimples at all. No matter how you do it, it increases your risk of scars and more breakouts. (Can’t be good for the mirror, either!)
✗ “Resting” your colon: One dietician says a juice cleanse to do this is the worst piece of advice on the internet. You need to do the opposite: eat high-fibre fruits and vegetables, probiotics and beans. (Please ONLY try this at home!)
-ReadersDigest

BS CHRONOMETER 05.09.18

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1946 [72] Candice Bergen, Beverly Hills CA, TV actress (“Murphy Brown” 1988-1998)/movie actress (“Miss Congeniality”)

1949 [69] Billy Joel, Bronx NY, pop/rock singer (‘Piano Man’, ‘My Life’)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1999)

1961 [57] John Corbett, Wheeling WV, movie actor (“My Big Fat Greek Wedding” films)/TV actor (“Sex&Drugs&Rock&Roll” 2015)

1979 [39] Pierre Bouvier, Montréal QC, rock singer (Simple Plan -‘Shut Up!’, ‘Welcome to My Life’)

1979 [39] Rosario Dawson, NYC, movie actress (“Rent”, “Sin City”)/TV actress (“Daredevil” 2015-2016)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Lost Sock Memorial Day”, a day to remember those singular hose that went into the washing machine or dryer never to return. (Play ‘Taps’ for them?)

• “Moscato Day”, raise your glass and toast National Moscato Day. Moscato, or Muscat in Italian, is one of the oldest known varieties of grapes.

• “Butterscotch Brownie Day” also known as Blondies or Brookie (brownie + cookie). Blonde brownies were actually created before chocolate brownies.

• “Bike to School Day”, the annual in coordination with National Bike Month. Don your helmets, everyone!

• “Receptionists Day”, in recognition of the frontline personnel in business and education, the ones responsible for a good first impression.

• “School Nurse Day”, to honor those dedicated professionals who write handy excuse notes.

• “Tear the Tags Off the Mattress Day”, this is definitely not an event for the timid. However if you like crave excitement and living out there on the edge, gird up your loins and fresh courage take! Forgo those posted warning from the government and rip off those tags! And if you’re really gutsy, do the pillows too.

COMING UP . . .
[Thurs] Clean Up Your Room Day
[Thurs] National Shrimp Day
[Fri] Eat What You Want Day
[Fri] National Twilight Zone Day

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2005 [13] Country singer Kenny Chesney weds “Bridget Jones” and actress Renée Zellweger in St John, US Virgin Islands (the marriage is dissolved after 4 months due to ‘fraud’)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1996 [22] The members of Rush are appointed Officers of the Order of Canada, the first band so honoured

2014 [04] Hunter Hayes breaks the record for most concerts performed in different cities in a single day when he plays 10 shows in 24 hours

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1987 [31] Baltimore Oriole Eddie Murray becomes the first player to hit switch-hit home runs in 2 consecutive games

BULL’S BITS

BS WACK FACTS:
✓ A study found that the free weights at the gym have 362 times more bacteria than a toilet seat.
✓ 16% of Google searches are for things that have never been Googled before.
✓ YouTube has a production space in Los Angeles that is free to use if you have 10,000 subscribers.
✓ Twitter has 310 million monthly active users, almost the same as the U.S. population.
✓ Earth is the only place in the solar system where a total solar eclipse can happen.
✓ All galaxies, regardless of size, rotate once every billion years.
-FactSlides

BS SILLY SONG COVERS:
• ‘Who Let the Dogs Out’ by Cat Stevens
• ‘I Don’t Like Mondays’ by The Sundays
• ‘Hot Stuff’ by Coldplay
• ‘Maneater’ by Fine Young Cannibals
• ‘Don’t Worry, Be Happy’ by Dire Straits
• ‘I Can See Clearly Now’ by Blind Melon
• ‘Do You Hear What I Hear’ by Def Leppard
• ‘If I Had a Hammer’ by Nine Inch Nails
• ‘The Tide is High’ by Frank Ocean
• ‘F the Police’ by The Police
• Any Kansas song by Toto
-Twitter

BS PHONE STARTER:
When you were younger, what invention were you certain we’d have by now that we currently don’t?

BS FACT OR CRAP?
Two of the following statements are true; 1 is total BS. Which?
1. Humans have the same number of hair follicles as chimpanzees.
2. Some prehistoric penguins were as tall as an adult human.
3. Snakes have 3 hearts. [BS. Octopuses have 3 hearts.]

BS RANDOM JOKE:
When it comes to screwing up the punchline, I’ve been there, done that, got the tea cup.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: When asked ‘why do you dislike certain neighbors?’, nearly 10% said this. What?
Answer: They fight too much

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Comparison is the thief of joy.