May 31 2021

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Monday, May 31, 2021 – Edition: #6997

The BS Press!


★ A few celeb deaths over the weekend: B.J. Thomas, the Grammy-winning singer who enjoyed success on the pop, country and gospel charts with hits like ‘Raindrops Keep Fallin’ On My Head’ and ‘Hooked on a Feeling’ passed away at 78. He announced in March that he had been diagnosed with stage four lung cancer. And Gavin MacLeod, known for his roles as ‘Captain Merrill Stubing’ in “The Love Boat” and ‘Murray Slaughter’ in “The Mary Tyler Moore Show,” has died at 90. His health had been poor recently but no cause of death was given.
★ “A Nightmare On Elm Street” star Robert Englund says he is responsible for Mark Hamill playing ‘Luke Skywalker’ in “Star Wars”. In an interview, Englund, told how when casting took place for the first film in George Lucas’ sci-fi saga, he was sharing an apartment with Hamill. He had found out about the movie because his name had been put forward to play the role of ‘Han Solo’ that eventually went to Harrison Ford. Englund told Hamill he thought he should get in contact about the role of ‘Luke’ because he would be perfect for the role. Hamill took his roommate’s advice and went on to play the Jedi Knight in six movies.
★ Martin Bashir’s controversial 1995 interview with Princess Diana will be a big part of the upcoming fifth season of “The Crown”, according to a report. Citing “a source close to the show,” The Telegraph says the 5th season will feature 2 episodes focused on Bashir’s “grooming” of Diana and his “deceitful” interview, depicting Bashir’s “dishonest” behavior and “how Diana was taken in by his lies.” Series creator Peter Morgan has completed writing the next season of “The Crown”, which is expected to air sometime in 2022.
★ Good news for “Charlie Bit My Finger” lovers: the viral video will remain on YouTube, after all, at the request of the new NFT owner. Howard Davies-Carr, the boys’ father who filmed the video, says: “The buyer felt that the video is an important part of popular culture and shouldn’t be taken down. It will now live on YouTube for the masses to continue enjoying as well as memorialized as an NFT.” The family launched an auction of the video as a non-fungible token on May 22, with the promise that it would be removed from YouTube. The next day, a bidder under the name “3fmusic” scored the NFT for $760,999, following a fierce bidding war. The original clip has been viewed more than 885 million times.

• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Emily Blunt, Diego Boneta, “American Idol” winner Chayce Beckham (R)
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Chris Rock, WILLOW, Travis Barker (R)
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Billy Crystal, Tiffany Haddish, the Black Keys (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV):  Denis Leary, Cristin Milioti, Patrick Radden Keefe (R)
• ” The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Rob Lowe, Zoe Wees (R)
• “Conan” (TBS): Lisa Kudrow (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Billy Crystal, Tiffany Haddish (R)
• “The Talk” (CBS): Derek Hough, Paul Stanley, guest co-host Francia Raisa
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Lisa Rinna, Joey Thurman
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Ryan Tedder, Glennon Doyle, OneRepublic
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Andy Cohen, Camilla Luddington, Melissa King, Rosé, Breland (R)
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Cameron Diaz, Lucy Liu, Adam Sandler (R)
• “American Ninja Warrior” (NBC): Season 13 premiere
• “Small Fortune” (NBC): Series premiere
• “Hell’s Kitchen” (FOX): Season 20 premiere
• “HouseBroken” (FOX): Series premiere. Fox’s newest animated comedy series centers on an assortment of neighborhood pets who are in group therapy together.
• “Gordon Ramsay: Uncharted” (NGC): Season 3 premiere

• Lady Gaga — has announced a 10th anniversary edition of “Born This Way”. The new edition, out June 18, will include 6 new versions of songs from the record featuring LGBTQIA+ artists. The first to be released is Big Freedia’s take on ‘Judas’, which is out now.
• Ed Sheeran – is going to add a band to his live performances. He’s always used a loop pedal on stage now wants the accompaniment of a full band for a better performance. Quote: “It feels like the next stage. I’ve done band stuff before but only at the request of TV shows.” He’s been working on his fourth album and says the first single will be “really different – like really, really different.”
• The Beatles – The new movie “The Beatles and India” will shed light on the group’s infamous trip to Rishikesh, India, in 1968. Accompanied by Donovan, Beach Boy Mike Love and actress Mia Farrow, the band sought enlightenment in the meditation classes of spiritualist, Maharishi Mahesh Yogi. The film hits theaters this fall, and will be accompanied by a soundtrack album.
• Queen – Their “Greatest Hits” album is being re-released July 2 to mark 5 decades of the iconic rock legends and the 40th anniversary of the LP. It made history as the first and only collection to have sold more than 6 million copies in the UK, with global sales above 25 million. The new collector’s edition with exclusive slipcase cover and a limited-edition cassette format are set for release on July 2.
• Gabby Barrett — Father’s Day is less than 3 weeks away, but with newborn daughter Baylah Mae, she already knows what she’s getting her husband, fellow country crooner Cade Foehner. Quote: “I have a really good surprise for him. I think I’m going to give him a custom saddle for horses.”
• Jason Aldean, Luke Combs and Thomas Rhett – are among the big names set to play The Faster Horses Festival, set for July 16-18 at the Michigan International Speedway in Brooklyn, MI. Also on the bill are: Jimmie Allen, Kelsea Ballerini, Gabby Barrett, Russell Dickerson, Riley Green, HARDY, Chris Lane, Tracy Lawrence, David Lee Murphy, Jon Pardi, Carly Pearce, Mitchell Tenpenny and DeeJay Silver.
• Shania Twain — will be wearing her ‘Man, I Feel Like A Woman!’ outfit for her Las Vegas residency. She’ll kick off the ‘Let’s Go!’ shows at Planet Hollywood Resort & Casino on December 2, and says she was pleased to fit back into the famous black bustier mini dress, white jacket, thigh-high velvet boots and black top hat from the 1999 video. She says she’ll wear 8 different ensembles during the Vegas concerts.


The Zoom wave. Are you familiar with it? It’s that awkward-feeling habit of signing off on video calls with that little wave that so many of us do, and then wonder why we just did it, and why it feels strange. Erica Dhawan, author of “Digital Body Language”, says the Zoom wave is just a part of our evolving body language in an increasingly digital world. In your real-world interactions with co-workers, you are able to smile, give a firm handshake and use other body language clues to signal a beginning and end to an interaction – but on a video call, it is much harder to give that signal. Another aspect is that we aren’t physically going anywhere. Instead of waving as we walk away, we wave, click a button, and are still sitting in the same place. And the way we need to keep out hands close to our head during a Zoom wave, to ensure that it is visible contributes to the feeling of awkwardness. How can you overcome the dreaded Zoom wave? Dhawan says to just forget your awkwardness, and embrace it as a part of how we communicate these days. “Get over it and empower yourself to use it,” she says.
(Fine. I’ll forget about how awkward I look. Until I try to sleep tonight!)
(I just want to know how it is that some people look so cute doing it, and I look like I possibly need a diaper!)
(Not only do I look Hella awkward, I have to stare at MY OWN face the whole time!)

If you have the money, Rolls-Royce will build it – probably. The luxury carmaker has announced its Coachbuild program, in which it will work with wealthy clients to design and build very expensive, very customized cars specifically for them. Rolls has unveiled a new model called the “Boat Tail,” of which only 3 are being made. It has a fully removable roof that is stored separately from the car. That frees up storage space which has been turned into a very expensive picnic basket. Two lids open up along the sides, containing expensive embossed silverware, glasses, napkins, and plates. There is a double champagne cooler designed to fit the buyer’s preferred bottle and colored to match. Cocktail tables also fold out, and there are two Italian-designed stools. For shade, a parasol is stored in the center between the hinged doors. While Rolls-Royce would not say how much the cars will cost, there are internet rumors floating around that Beyoncé and Jay-Z are some of the first buyers – to the tune of $28 million.
(Fine. But I’ll be just as happy driving my ’95 Jeep to the beach with a bucket of KFC. And if it rains, I’ll have a roof handy!)
(You know what this means, right? I’m just one lottery win away from my own Batmobile!)
-CNN, LADBible

A dad in Virginia has come up with a “spittle-free” way to blow out birthday candles. Mark Apelt says he used some of his free time during the pandemic working on an invention that coincidentally involved stopping germs — a device that allows birthday candles to be blown out without sending saliva droplets flying across the cake. He came up with the idea for the “Blowzee” birthday cake candle extinguisher while at a child’s birthday party before the pandemic. The Blowzee allows children to use their own breath to blow, but the air that travels over the cake doesn’t come from their lungs. When they blow, an electronic sensor is activated that switches on a fan, creating enough clean air flow to blow out the candle. The child’s blown air circles around and is directed toward the ‘blower’. The Blowzee has been a hit with those who have tried it, and is available online. LINK:
(That’s great! Now can this guy come up with something that does the same with a kid’s runny nose?)
(Made for children…but equally effective for Grandma!)
(You mean to tell me that some day, it may be possible for my child to come home from a birthday party WITHOUT a cold?)

According to experts . . .
➢ Maintain a consistent sleep schedule, even on weekends:  Going to bed at 9pm on weeknights and 2am on weekends makes your body feel like it has flown across 5 time zones on Saturday morning, and again on Monday. This results in social jet lag, where your sleep time falls out of sync with social obligations like work or school. (So, stay up until 2am all week, too?)
➢ Don’t hit snooze:  Those 10-minute naps don’t add up to the quality sleep you need because the alarm will go off before you get a chance to enter deeper stages of sleep. (But they feel sooo good!)
➢ Avoid sleep aids:  Medications like Benadryl and Advil PM help you fall asleep, but can also interfere with your ability to awaken feeling perked-up and ready to go the next morning. (Same with beer, I find…)
➢ Skip the nightcap:  Yes, it can help you fall asleep faster, but can lower your sleep quality, leaving you bleary-eyed the following day. It can also interrupt your sleep to get up and pee (Hopefully…).
➢ Try a gentle-wake sunrise alarm:  There are a number of alarm clocks that mimic sunrise and gradually brighten, gently rousing you from slumber — rather than startling you awake, like a conventional alarm clock. (Or a conventional toddler…)

“Water bears” and baby squid are hitching a ride into space. They animals will be joining the astronaut crew aboard the International Space Station when SpaceX launches its 22nd cargo resupply mission to the space station on Thurs. 5,000 tardigrades, also known as water bears, and 128 baby glow-in-the-dark bobtail squid will be involved in experiments there. The first will be to see how water bears tolerate the environment. Researchers also want to know if the lack of gravity affects symbiotic relationships between the squid and beneficial microbes.


1930 [91] Clint Eastwood, San Francisco CA, movie director (Oscars- “Million Dollar Baby”, “Unforgiven”)/movie actor (“Dirty Harry”, “The Bridges of Madison County”) COMING UP…”Cry Macho”, 2021

1960 [61] Chris Elliott, New York City NY, movie actor (“Cabin Boy”, “There’s Something About Mary”)/TV actor (“Schitt’s Creek” 2015-20)

1961 [60] Lea Thompson, Rochester NY, movie actress (“Back To The Future”), TV actress (“Caroline In The City” 1995-2000)

1965 [56] Brooke Shields, New York City NY, model/movie actress (“The Blue Lagoon”)/author (“Down Came the Rain”)/former TV actress (“Lipstick Jungle” 2008-09, “Suddenly Susan” 1996-2000)

1976 [45] Colin Farrell, Dublin Ireland, movie actor (“Total Recall”, “Horrible Bosses”) COMING UP…”After Yang”, 2021

1980 [41] Andy Hurley, Menomonee Falls WI, rock drummer (Fall Out Boy–‘Sugar, We’re Goin Down’, ‘Centuries’)

1991 [30] Azealia Banks, New York City NY, rapper, singer-songwriter (‘Chasing Time’)/

1991 [30] Farrah Abraham, Omaha NE, reality star (“16 & Pregnant”, “Teen Mom”)

1996 [25] Normani Hamilton, Atlanta GA, pop singer (Fifth Harmony-‘Work from Home’, reality TV contestant (“Dancing With The Stars”- Season 24)

• “Memorial Day”, in the US, honoring men and women who have died while serving in the military. It began in the years following the Civil War, in which more soldiers sacrificed their lives than in any previous conflict. After the war ended in 1865, the first national cemeteries were established. Memorial Day is also considered the unofficial start of summer in the United States.

• “Macaroon Day”, honoring those ooey-gooey coconut cookies that stick to your fillings.

• “Save Your Hearing Day”, something older people often advise younger people to do. But most don’t listen until they reach the point when they can’t. (***See “Today’s Record”, below***)

• “Speak in Complete Sentences Day”, a good excuse to bring up our pet peeve about newscasters who write sentences without active verbs, i.e.: “Police searching for suspects in a kidnapping today.” (NOT a complete sentence [ha!])

• “World No-Tobacco Day”, as declared by the UN’s World Health Organization to encourage people to kick their butts. (I quit smoking cold turkey. And started putting it on my sandwiches instead…)

• “National Meditation Day”, today we partake in a mental exercise of private devotion called meditation. It uses the techniques of concentration and contemplation to attain spiritual awareness and purification, and to calm the body and mind. (I tried to get a job teaching meditation, but I didn’t have a good inner view!)

[Tues] Dare Day
[Tues] Flip a Coin Day
[Wed] National Bubba Day
[Wed] Rocky Road Day
This Week Is…CPR and AED Awareness Week
This Month Is…Zoo and Aquarium Month

1990 [31] “Seinfeld,” starring Jerry Seinfeld, debuts on NBC as “Seinfeld Chronicles”

2000 [21] The reality series “Survivor” debuts as a 3-month Summer show on CBS (Richard, Rudy, Susan, Sean, Colleen, Kelly, Greg, and Gervase quickly become household names). Season 41 premieres this Fall.

2017 [04] Comedienne Kathy Griffin is fired from CNN after a photo of her holding bloody head resembling Donald Trump is posted on her social media accounts

2014 [07] Michael Jackson becomes the first artist with Top 10 hits in five consecutive decades as ‘Love Never Felt So Good’ reaches #9

2014 [07] Psy’s ‘Gangnam Style’ becomes the first video to reach 2 billion views on YouTube (now over 4 billion)

1976 [45] The Who sets the Guinness Record for ‘Loudest Concert’, putting out a total of 76,000 watts of power at 126 decibels (no wonder it’s “Save Your Hearing Day”). Guinness no longer certifies this record.


✓ Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson eats about 10 pounds of food every day.
✓ Contrary to popular belief, Walt Disney is not cryogenically frozen. He was cremated.
✓ Buzz Aldrin’s mother’s maiden name was “Moon.”
✓ For her role in “Winter’s Bone”, Jennifer Lawrence learned how to skin squirrels.
✓ Will Smith’s first name is actually Willard, not William.
✓ Mark Zuckerberg’s home AI assistant is voiced by Morgan Freeman.
-UberFacts, SoTrueFacts

• Can I watch Charlie Brown if I’m allergic to peanuts?
• Am I allergic to romantic comedies because I get watery eyes?
• What do I do if I’m allergic to allergy medications?
• If you’re allergic to mussels, is it safe to go to the gym?
• Do I sound cool when I say “I’m sneezy fo sheezy?”
• Am I being rash?
• Can I borrow your sleeve?

Best of BS . . .
• “How to Properly Exit the Hand Basket”
• “How to Have a Snowball’s Chance”
• “For Those of You Who Worked as Servers or in Retail, This Won’t Be Much of an Adjustment”
• “Enjoying Limitless Decaf”
• “Don’t Bother to Stop, Drop, or Roll”
• “What to Do When Someone’s NOT on Fire”
• “Why There Are So Many Cats Here”
• “Damned if You Do, Damned if You Don’t”
• “Keeping Up With the Kardashians”
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2019

➠ Today is Memorial Day in the US. Sometimes I worry that with all the fireworks and partying, the true message of Memorial Day gets lost: And that message is, of course, “Don’t forget to take advantage of huge mattress deals…”
➠ It’s Memorial Day. (Over the weekend I invited a bunch of friends over for a BBQ. And by “friends” I mean, “people who could advance my career”.  And by “people who could advance my career,” I mean “nobody.”  What I’m saying is I barbecued alone…)
➠ This week back in 1953, Sir Edmund Hillary became the first man to climb Mount Everest.  (He was immediately knighted for his accomplishment. Which is why climbing Everest is considered the fastest way to become a “sir”, outside of gender reassignment surgery.)
➠ CeeLo Green turned 46 yesterday. (So, if you run into him, give ’em a ‘medium-five’!)
➠ Florida Man was punched over a face-mask dispute inside a Key West ice cream shop. (Name of the Ice cream parlor? Ben & Jerry Springer’s, of course!)

Monday cuteness overload:

• Which movie was NOT based on a book?
a) Jurassic Park
b) The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
c) Star Wars [CORRECT]
d) The Wizard of Oz

• Which is NOT a country’s capital city?
a) Paris
b) Madrid
c) Shanghai [CORRECT, China’s capital is Beijing)
d) San José [capital of Costa Rica]

• Which of the following mattress sizes is the smallest?
a) Twin [CORRECT]
b) King
c) Queen
d) Prince

What is something from your childhood that a younger person wouldn’t understand?

The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it.

Question:  On average, adults do THIS 300 days a year. What is it?
Answer:  Wake up grumpy


Bad communication ends a lot of good things.


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