November 23 2018

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Friday, November 23, 2018 – Edition: #6343

Sheet Happens!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ While some Hollywood stars take issue with their lips or their butt and elect to have them artificially enhanced, Chrissy Teigen has a problem with her FEET, which she says are so ugly that her contracts state they must be retouched. While chatting with Ellen DeGeneres, Teigen casually mentioned that she hates bare feet and immediately covered up her toes, which were chillin’ in the open air. Chrissy laughed and said, “I have Asian jungle feet, like we’re meant to climb trees.”   When Ellen tried to get a good look, Teigen slid off the couch and literally sat on her feet so nobody could see.
-Cosmopolitan
★ Margot Robbie is finally revealing some details on the upcoming “Harley Quinn” standalone film. She posted a photo from a script readthrough on Instagram, which revealed the title, “Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of one Harley Quinn)”. The flick is set to be released on Feb. 7, 2020.
-MSN
★ The upcoming “Sopranos” prequel film has just cast it’s first Made Man. Indie actor Alessandro Nivola will take on the role of Dickey Moltisanti in the movie, called “The Many Saints of Newark”. Nivola’s character is the uncle of Tony Soprano, who was famously played by James Gandolfini. Dicky was never seen during the TV show’s six-season run, but he was referenced several times as a mentor of Tony’s.
-DailyMail
★ Justin Timberlake has been sneaking into book stores and secretly signing copies of his autobiography “Hindsight: And All The Things I Can’t See In Front Of Me”.  On Wednesday, he took to Instagram and posted a third video of him sneaking into a store – this time Barnes & Noble at The Grove in Los Angeles – and signing a number of books. He captioned the video: ”Strikes again. Come and get em, part III…” That followed previous similar posts shared by Timberlake, of him visiting a different branch of Barnes & Noble two days after the book was released, and a Target store a few days later.
-ContactMusic
★ Jennifer Lopez wasn’t the only victim to have her star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame vandalized on Tuesday. Other stars were also hit, including Ellen DeGeneres, Michael Bublé, and Pharrell. We are told that it will cost about $1k per star to remove the spray paint and reseal them.
-TMZ

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Emily Blunt, Taron Egerton, Kane Brown (R)
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Lady Gaga (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Cher, William H. Macy (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Jason Segel, Geraldo Rivera (R)
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Kevin Hart, Faith Ford
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Benedict Cumberbatch, Cher, Yara Shahidi, Justin Willman (R)
• “Frosty the Snowman” (CBS): Jimmy Durante narrates the story about the warmhearted man of snow, who risks a meltdown unless he can get to the North Pole.
• “Santa Claus Is Comin’ to Town” (ABC): Fred Astaire and Mickey Rooney lend their voices to this holiday tale, which explains the legend of Santa Claus and how he began delivering toys to children on Christmas Eve.
• “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” (NBC): The Dr. Seuss tale about the Whos, creatures who like nothing better than Christmas, and the evil Grinch, with a heart two sizes too small—and a plan to steal the holiday. Boris Karloff narrates this 1966 classic.
• “Jim Gaffigan: Noble Ape” (COMEDY): In his stand-up special, Gaffigan uses humor to discuss difficult topics as he opens up about his family’s struggles when dealing with his wife’s brain tumor.
• “The Match” (PPV): Tigers Woods’ one-on-one against Phil Mickelson with $9 million on the line.  From Shadow Creek in Las Vegas at 3pm ET.

SATURDAY-
• “Robbie the Reindeer” (CBS): Rudolph’s son Robbie (voice of Ben Stiller) joins Santa’s sleigh team, unaware that jealous Blitzen (Hugh Grant) is plotting against him.
• “Christmas Everlasting” (HALLMARK): Lucy learns that she has made a partner at her law firm.

SUNDAY-
• “Grey Cup” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Ottawa Redblacks vs. Calgary Stampeders in the 106th Grey Cup from Commonwealth Stadium in Edmonton. Alessia Cara headlines the 2018 Grey Cup halftime show
• “2018 Soul Train Awards” (BET): Performers include Faith Evans, Carl Thomas, Koryn Hawthorne, and Bell Biv Devoe. Hosted by Tichina Arnold And Tisha Campbell.

BS MUSIC NOTES:

• Kanye West — will reportedly donate $500,000 towards the California wildfire relief. He is said to have gone to Adidas and his own Yeezy brand to raise funds to support people who have battled the devastating blaze.
• Ariana Grande — continues to tease fans eagerly waiting for her ‘Thank U, Next’ video.  She shared a photo of herself in a red cheerleader uniform on Wednesday, with a caption referencing the character ‘Missy Pantone’ from the 2000 film “Bring It On”.  Grande has previously shared photos of herself dressed as “Mean Girls’” Regina George and “Legally Blonde’s” Elle Woods.
• Ricky Martin — A year after Hurricane Maria ravaged the island, he is selling t-shirts featuring a flag of Puerto Rico drawn by his 10-year-old twin sons, Matteo and Valentino, to continue raising money for victims and communities.
• The Beatles — A new book, “The Roof: The Beatles’ Final Concert”, written by Apple Records former U.S. manager. Ken Mansfield, takes a comprehensive look at the group’s monumental 1969 rooftop concert, which became their final live appearance.  The book, is out now in North America, and will be released Dec. 11 in the UK.
• Alex Lifeson – will appear on the just-announced upcoming album by blues veteran John Mayall.  “Nobody Told Me” will be released on Feb. 22, by which time Mayall will be 85 years old. It will also feature guest appearances from Todd Rundgren and Steven Van Zandt, among others.
• Weezer — invited fan Kira Iaconetti to join them at an upcoming show after a video of her singing ‘Island in the Sun’ while undergoing brain surgery went viral. The 19-year-old sang throughout her procedure so that doctors could identify parts of her brain to avoid while removing the tumor. She says the lyric “I can’t control my brain” has special significance for her.
• Kane Brown – When asked what one thing he requires in his dressing room when he plays a show, he didn’t have to think long before he came up with an answer: “Jameson.” Jameson is an Irish whiskey.
• Kelsea Ballerini – her lazy birthday a few years ago inspired her now-husband Morgan Evans’ new single ‘Day Drunk’.  He says that he had a fun day planned for her birthday, but she was tired from being on the road and asked if they could just stay in and have some champagne. The feel-good song recalls their day at home together getting “Day Drunk.”

THIS WEEK’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Ralph Breaks the Internet” (PG, Animation/Kids):  Six years after the events of “Wreck-It Ralph”, Ralph and Vanellope, now friends, discover a wi-fi router in their arcade, leading them into a new adventure. (John C. Reilly, Sarah Silverman, Gal Gadot)
• “Creed II” (PG-13, Action/Adventure):  Under the tutelage of Rocky Balboa, Adonis Creed faces off against Viktor Drago, the son of Ivan Drago. (Michael B. Jordan, Sylvester Stallone)
• “Robin Hood” (PG-13, Action/Adventure):  A war-hardened Crusader and his Moorish commander mount an audacious revolt against the corrupt English crown. (Taron Egerton, Jamie Foxx, Ben Mendelsohn)
• “The Favourite” (R-Rated, Drama):  In early 18th century England, a frail Queen Anne occupies the throne and her close friend Lady Sarah governs the country in her stead. When a new servant Abigail arrives, her charm endears her to Sarah. (Olivia Colman, Emma Stone, Rachel Weisz)

TANKS A LOT:
You may have heard of the ‘edible slime’ that is being marketed by Jell-O as something that kids can play with AND eat.  That’s going to seem mild when you hear about some other things that are available for the kids in time for the holiday season.  “Poo” toys are everywhere this year with sparkly, shiny, squishy, slimy and even stinky variations available for you to spend your hard-earned money on, and then find on your living room floor.  IndigoKids vice president Lesley Nightingale says they are noticing that for kids, it seems to be ‘the more gross, the better’ when it comes to playthings.  And boy, are the toy companies delivering, with things like the ‘Poopsie Slime Surprise Unicorn’, which excretes glittery slime into a glitter potty, and ‘Flushin’ Frenzy’, which shoots a stool rocket out of a tiny toilet.  Or you could even get the ‘Flush Force’, which is a tiny toilet with collectible characters lurking inside the tank.
(I just can’t wait for a kid to sit in Santa’s lap and tell him that they would like this toy, and that toy, and “Oh, and I’d also take a poo…”)
(Baby’s first plunger kit sold separately…)
(Are you sure these things are aimed at kids…because I’m pretty sure [co-host] would be amused for hours by one of those things!)
-CP

TOO STUPID FOR US TO MAKE UP:
►The widow of a Saskatoon, SK man is working to have her husband’s unusual dying wish fulfilled — preserving his tattooed skin. The well-known tattoo artist asked that his ink-adorned skin be removed before he was buried.  Chris Wenzel wanted his kids and grandkids to see his life’s work long after he was gone.  His wife Cheryl says before his death last month, he discovered Save My Ink Forever, a U-S-based company that preserves tattoos.  The company had never worked on such a scale before., but sent their CEO to Saskatoon to surgically excise Wenzel’s skin and preserve it in a frame.  The job will cost about $80,000 and take about three months.
(Did the guy never hear of a “selfie”?)
-CP
A Deland, Florida family caused a bit of a stir in the neighborhood when people nearby heard the sounds of people yelling “Please don’t kill me” and “That is my gun, give it to me” coming from inside their house.  Concerned neighbours called the police, who arrived just in time…to catch the end of the family’s rousing game of “Call of Duty”.  The family assures police that they will shut the windows when playing the video game in the future.
(Or they could shut their mouths!!)
-FOX
► Firefighters in Northamptonshire, England were in for a surprise when they responded to a fire emergency.  It turns out it was a false alarm, but it wasn’t a prank. It was the talented parrot in the house imitating the fire alarm. While firefighters were looking for signs of fire in the house, the beeping sound of the alarm continued. It was then they discovered that it was Jazz, the parrot, perfectly imitating the alarm.
(Then he ‘tweeted’ about it!)
-NDTV

FORBES TOP EARNING FEMALE MUSICIANS OF 2018:
Katy Perry storms up the chart for this year (June 2017-June 2018), improving on her 2017 #9 ranking ($33 million) to take the top spot from last year’s #1, Beyonce (105 million)…
1. Katy Perry ($83 million)
2. Taylor Swift ($80 million)
3. Beyoncé ($60 million)
4. Pink ($52 million)
5. Lady Gaga ($50 million)
6. Jennifer Lopez ($47 million)
7. Rihanna ($37.5 million)
8. Helene Fischer ($32 million)
9. Celine Dion ($31 million)
10. Britney Spears ($30 million)
-Forbes

BS CHRONOMETER 11.23.18

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1960 [58] Robin Roberts, Tuskeegee AL, TV co-host (“Good Morning America” since 2005)

1971 [47] Lesley Fera, California, TV actress (“Pretty Little Liars” 2010-2017)

1971 [47] Chris Hardwick, Louisville KY, comedian (“@Midnight” 2013-17, “Talking Dead” since 2011)

1987 [31] Snooki (Nicole Polizzi), Santiago Chile, reality star (“Jersey Shore” 2009-2012, “Snooki & JWOWW” 2012-2015, “Jersey Shore: Family Vacation” 2018))

1992 [26] Miley Cyrus (born Destiny Hope Cyrus), Nashville TN, pop singer (‘Wrecking Ball’, ‘The Climb’)/TV actress (“Hannah Montana” 2006-10)

SATURDAY-
TV actor Conleth Hall (“Game of Thrones”) is 54, TV actor Colin Hanks (“Life in Pieces”) is 41; TV actress Katherine Heigl (“Grey’s Anatomy”) is 40; TV Sarah Hyland (“Modern Family”) is 28

SUNDAY-
TV personality Bruno Tonioli (“Dancing With the Stars”) is 63; Country singer Amy Grant (“Baby Baby”) is 58; Movie actress Christina Applegate (“Married With Children”) is 47; TV actor Kristian Nairn (“Game of Thrones”) is 43

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Black Friday”, the day after US Thanksgiving that’s touted as the biggest single shopping day of the year in America, although that’s statistically untrue. The ‘black’ refers to retailers finally turning a profit after spending much of the year ‘in the red’.  Many retailers kick off their annual sales on Thursday…or earlier in the week…or month.
• “Buy Nothing Day”, a 24-hour moratorium on holiday shopping (today in North America; tomorrow internationally), created as a protest against outlandish consumption and commercialism, particularly during the holiday season.
• “Cashew Day”, celebrating the yummy nut that sounds like a sneeze. (ca-SHEEEWW!)
• “Espresso Day”, a good excuse to have a wake-me-up shot this morning.  Luigi Bezzera invented the espresso coffee machine in Italy in 1901.  His objective was to decrease his employees’ coffee break time and increase their productivity.  The small cup in which an espresso is served is called a demitasse.
• “Dr. Who Day”, marks the 55th anniversary of “An Unearthly Child,” the debut episode of Doctor Who and the origin point of an ever-expanding universe.  Originally airing on the BBC at precisely 5:15, William Hartnell’s Doctor Who hopped in his big blue police box and embarked on an adventure that has enamored millions of fans for more than a half-century. Happy birthday, Doctor.
• “Eat a Cranberry Day”, native to North America, cranberries are grown in bogs, primarily in New England. When the pilgrims landed at Plymouth Rock, they found Native Americans harvesting them, and eating them.  Native Americans also used them as dyes for clothing, and for medicinal purposes.

SATURDAY-
• “Celebrate Your Unique Talent Day”, saluting the individual abilities each of us has. Okay, so what is it that you can do that no one else can? Whistle through your nose? Play both armpits simultaneously? Recite the alphabet backwards? (***See today’s Phone Starter***)
• “Small Business Saturday”, an annual reminder to support the little mom & pop operations during the holiday season buying frenzy.
• “National Sardines Day”, Here are today’s five thing to know about Sardines:
– Sardines live short lives, and grow quite quickly. They can reach a length of about 23cm in two years.
– Sardines are the most plentiful edible fish in the world.
– The main ingredient in Worcestershire sauce is fermented sardines.
– The term sardine was first used in English during the early 15th century and may come from the Mediterranean island of Sardinia, around which sardines were once abundant.
– The original ‘secret’ ingredient in Caesar Salad is crushed sardines.

SUNDAY-
• “Parfait Day”, saluting the yummy treat that’s concocted from layers of ice cream, whipped cream, and any combination of syrups and fruits. Yes, it’s basically a fancy word for a sundae … likely because it’s usually served in a fancy glass.
• “Shopping Reminder Day”, marking exactly 1 month until Christmas Day.  Just what you wanted to hear, huh?
• “International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women”, initiated by activists in 1981 and adopted by the UN in 1999 to help raise awareness of this worldwide problem.
NET: http://www.un.org/en/events/endviolenceday/
• “Blasé Day”, a perfect day for the world-weary to revel in their apathy. (Eh, who cares.)

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2013 [05] A special episode of Brit sci-fi program “Doctor Who” entitled ‘The Day Of the Doctor’ airs simultaneously in 94 countries to celebrate the show’s 50th anniversary (Guinness World Record for the largest-ever simulcast of a TV drama)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1979 [39] Pink Floyd’s “The Wall” is released, sells 6 million copies in 2 weeks

2013 [05] One Direction hosts “1D Day”, a 7½ hour interactive live-stream on YouTube and Google+ Hangout that includes live band performances and celebrity guests (an unprecedented use of social media)

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2005 [13] Ellen Johnson Sirleaf is elected president of Liberia, becoming the 1st woman to lead an African country

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2000 [18] Dot-com tycoon Jaakko Rytsola sets a world record in Finland with a $71,400 speeding ticket (traffic fines in Finland are linked to the offender’s income).  This record has since been beaten…bigtime…by a Swiss driver who was ticketed to the tune of US$1million!

BULL’S BITS

BS WACK FACTS:
✓ “Beats” by Dre headphones, which can sell for as much as $450, cost about $14 to produce.
✓ J. R. R. Tolkien typed the entire 1,200-page manuscript of The Lord of the Rings trilogy with two fingers.
✓ The Mona Lisa hung on Napoleon’s bedroom wall for years.
✓ Like people, birds that live in the city are louder, meaner, and more stressed-out than their country cousins.
✓ The world seems quieter right after a snowfall because the blanket of fresh powder absorbs sound, making things seem “calmer.”
✓ The day after tomorrow is called “Overmorrow.”
-WhattheFFacts, UberFacts

Best of BS . . .
BS THINGS OVERHEARD IN LINE ON BLACK FRIDAY:

• “Black Friday has become so commercialized.”
• “I do hate missing my kid’s birthday.”
• “Someday, there’ll be a way to shop from home.”
• “This isn’t the line to vote?”
• “I’m just waiting to return something.”
• “Just 4 more hours in line and boom! … 10 whole dollars off a giant-screen TV!”
• “Sale? I’m avoiding my family.”
• “So, where did YOUR life go wrong?”
-First published in BS in 2017

BS OVERHEARD AT THE DUDE RANCH:
• “Why the long face?”
• “They call it a Quarter Horse, but I’m pretty sure that’s all of it…”
• “We’re trying to find investors for our Stirrup Company.”
• “I thought they said ‘nude’ ranch.”
• “So, what does a rough n’ tough cowboy like me have to do to get a soy-latte around here?”
• “Where’s my car?”
• (***Caution***) “That’s a steer, sir. The milking barn is over there.”
• (***Caution***) “I thought you said I’d have my own whores.”
• “This IS my first rodeo!”
-Twitter

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
1. If a liquor is 100 proof, how much alcohol does it contain by percentage?
a. 100%
b. 50% [CORRECT]
c. 40%
d. 200%

2.  What notable brand of alcohol takes its name from the romanticized life of a Welsh buccaneer who routed the Spanish in an attack on Panama City in 1671?
a. Johnny Walker
b. Jose Cuervo
c. Captain Morgan [CORRECT]
d. Bud Weiser
-Trivia.fyi

BS PHONE STARTER:
What is your unique talent?

BS RANDOM JOKE:
The last thing I want to do is insult someone.  But it is on the list…

BS WATER COOLER QUESTIONS:
Question:  In a survey, 67% of people said they could take up to a week to do this.
Answer:  Eat Thanksgiving leftovers.

Question:  31% of married men will use THIS for an average of 7 years before replacing it. What is it?
Answer:  Underwear

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
I’ve found that coffee makes my weekdays possible, but it makes my weekends beautiful.

 

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