Friday, November 13, 2009        Edition: #4143
Thanks a Sheetload for Choosing “BS”!


BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:

“Twilight” stars Taylor Lautner & Kristen Stewart have revealed they had a recent scare in Brazil when some 2,000 fans stormed their hotel and had to be kept away by riot police (you say you wanna be famous?) . . . 47-year-old actress Demi Moore says she’s struggling to land the major lead roles she desires, insisting she’s being overlooked due to Hollywood ageism (“Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle” didn’t help either) . . . Eliza Dushku fans weep – FOX has announced that “Dollhouse” will soon be going out of business, with the series finalé of the fantasy drama scheduled to air January 22nd (who would have thought a hi-tech whorehouse wouldn’t be a hit?) . . . ABC has announced that Kelsey Grammar’s latest TV series “Hank” has been axed after just 5 episodes due to poor ratings (that’s even quicker than his 2008 misfire, “Back To You”) . . . “24” star Kiefer Sutherland has reportedly rekindled his romance with ex-wife Kelly Winn, the former model he split from in 1999 after 3 years of marriage (cool, recycling!) . . . Singer-actress Ashlee Simpson-Wentz wants to follow in big sister Jessica’s footsteps and design her own fashion line (because the hits and TV shows are now few and far between) . . . And “Playboy” has confirmed that sorta actress Tara Reid will appear in the magazine’s upcoming issue ‘au naturel’ (come to think of it, there isn’t much natural that’s left of her).

WEEKEND SHOW BIZ SKED:

• “Bonnie Hunt Show” (syndicated/CityTV) – This afternoon Dashboard Confessional (“After the Ending”).
• “Jay Leno Show” (NBC/CityTV) – Tonight Sheryl Crow (“Detours”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight 1980s pop act Huey Lewis & The News.
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – Tonight Harry Connick Jr (“Your Songs”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – Tonight Kid Sister (“Ultraviolet”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Tonight Mariah Carey promotes her New Year’s Eve concert at NYC’s Madison Square Garden.
• “Sugarland: Live On the Inside” (CMT) – Tonight a rerun of their ABC-TV special from the summer airs.
• “Today Show” (NBC) – This morning Train (“Save Me San Francisco”).
• “Tonight Show With Conan O’Brien” (NBC/A Channel) – Tonight Kris Allen (“No Boundaries”).
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – This morning ‘70s-‘80s band Kool & The Gang.

BS MUSIC NOTES:

• Black Eyed Peas – Fergie tells gay magazine “The Advocate” that her past has already been well documented so gossips recently getting excited about her bisexuality are about 5 years late with the news.
• Carrie Underwood – Her Saturday appearance at the Grand Ole Opry will be streamed live on MySpace, the first time an Opry performance has been offered as a live video stream.
• Elvis Presley – Saturday another lock of his hair is being auctioned off, this time in London. The strand was kept for decades by a fan who claims he got it from Elvis’ personal barber. Last month in Chicago, a clump of hair believed to have been cut from Elvis’ head when he joined the Army in 1958 sold for $15,000.
• Michael Jackson – A new report suggests he underwent several 3-D scans in 1996 so a virtual reality ‘robotic’ twin could be produced. It is thought the scans could now be used to bring him back to life in videos, computer games, even films. That’s why the owner wants a million bucks for them.
• Natasha Bedingfield – The 27-year-old is currently working on her next album with a host of big-name producers, including Wyclef Jean. She hopes to release the project early next year.
• Them Crooked Vultures – Dave Grohl says he formed his latest band during a ‘blind date’ with Josh Homme and John Paul Jones at a Medieval Times banquet for his birthday (January 14th).

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:

• “Pirate Radio” ( R-Rated Comedy ): Philip Seymour Hoffman, Bill Nighy, and Nick Frost star in this 1960s-era comedy about an illegal radio station run by a band of rogue DJs on a ship in the middle of the North Sea. The story harkens back to Radio Caroline and other ‘pirate radio stations’ in the days before private commercial radio came to Britain. Shot entirely on location in the UK.
NET: http://filminfocus.com/focusfeatures/film/pirate_radio/
• “2012” ( PG-13 Action Thriller ): John Cusack plays an academic researcher who leads a group of survivors in a fight to counteract the apocalyptic events that were predicted by the Mayan calendar. Co-stars Amanda Peet, Danny Glover, Thandie Newton, Woody Harrelson, and about a thousand others. Based on (or maybe the cause of?) a popular misconception that the Mayan ‘Long Count’ calendar ‘ends’ in 2012, thereby predicting a worldwide apocalypse.
NET: http://www.sonypictures.com/movies/2012/

STRIPPERMOBILE DEBUTS:
It’s the ultimate advertising vehicle, says the marketing director for Déjà Vu Showgirls in Las Vegas. He’s talking about what resembles a U-Haul truck but with Plexiglas surrounding the brightly lit cargo area instead of walls. In the middle is a gleaming stripper pole. Scantily clad young women take turns swinging around the pole as the vehicle putters up and down Las Vegas Boulevard, attempting to lure customers to the all-nude Déjà Vu and Little Darlings gentlemen’s clubs. Is it working? You bet. In less than 2 weeks business has doubled!
– “Las Vegas Sun”

WE ALL SCREAM FOR ICE CREAM:

If food scientists are successful, ice cream will become another so-called ‘functional food’, alongside whole oat products and foods made with soy protein, which have scientifically established health benefits beyond basic nutrition. In addition to ice-cream’s fat- and calorie-filled ingredients, food chemistry researchers at the University of Missouri-Columbia. hope to add dietary fiber, antioxidants, and probiotics (gut bacteria) to the delectable dessert, thereby actually making it good for you.
– LiveScience.com

NEW BS GIZMOS & GADGETS:
• The new ‘Stop Thief’ chair is a very simple crime-busting stacking chair, presumably aimed at bars, cafés and restaurants. It features a couple of slots in the seat so you can slip in the strap of your purse (or man-bag), thus securing it between your legs, safe from the wandering hands of light-fingered street thieves.
NET: http://www.telovation.com/articles/new-chair-protects-purses-theft.html
– “Wired”
• Blockbuster Video Stores are piloting a new movie-rental program that allows customers to load movies onto an SD card (like the one you slide into your digital camera) and play them back on cellphones, computers, and TVs equipped with SD readers. The rentals are cheaper than a traditional DVD, just $1.99.
– Telovation.com

FOR THE RECORD:
Volkswagen lovers at the 21st annual “Bug Jam” in Dade City FL have broken a “Guinness World Record” for squeezing the most people into a 1971 Beetle … 17 of them! The previous record of 15 was set last year in Brazil.
– “Tampa Tribune”

DID YOU KNOW?
• It’s estimated that 160 billion emails are now sent daily and about 97% of them are spam.
• Spam uses an estimated 33 billion kilowatt-hours of energy per year, enough to power 2.4 million homes, producing 17 million tons of CO2.
• 9 out of every 1,000 computers are infected with spam-generated bugs.
• Spammers only get 1 response to every 12 million emails they send, yet still manage to make a profit.
– DidYouKnow.org

BS CHRONOMETER 11.13.09


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1954 [55] Chris Noth, Madison WI, movie actor (“Sex & The City”, “Cast Away”)/TV actor (“Law & Order: Criminal Intent” 2005-08, “Sex & the City” 1998-2004, “Law & Order” 1990-95)

1955 [54] Whoopi Goldberg (Caryn Johnson), NYC, TV personality (“The View” since 2007, “Hollywood Squares” 1998-2002)/movie actress (“Sister Act”, “Ghost”)/one of only 13 people who have won an Emmy, a Grammy, an Oscar, and a Tony Award

1967 [42] Jimmy Kimmel, Brooklyn NY, TV host (“Jimmy Kimmel Live” since 2003, “The Man Show” 1999-2003, “Win Ben Stein’s Money” 1997-2001)

1969 [40] Gerard Butler, Paisley, Scotland, movie actor (“RocknRolla”, “300”)

1978 [31] Nikolai Fraiture, NYC, rock bassist (The Strokes-“Juicebox”, “Hard to Explain”)

1980 [29] Monique Coleman, Orangeburg SC, movie actress (“High School Musical” films)

SATURDAY –
Heir to the British throne Prince Charles is 61; Rapper Reverend Run (Run-DMC) is 45; Rock bassist Brian Yale (matchbox twenty) is 41; Movie actor Josh Duhamel (“Transformers”) is 37; Rock drummer Travis Barker (Blink-182) is 34; Rock bassist Tobin Esperance (Papa Roach) is 30.

SUNDAY –
TV/movie actor Ed Asner (“Up”) is 80; TV actor Sam Waterston (“Law & Order”) is 69; Bandleader Kevin Eubanks (“Jay Leno Show”) is 52; Country singer Jack Ingram (“Wherever You Are”) is 39; Rock singer Chad Kroeger (Nickelback) is 35; TV actor Sean Murray (“NCIS”) is 32.

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .

• “Friday the 13th”, a supposedly unlucky day. Every year has at least one, but never more than three.
ORIGINS OF SUPERSTITIONS:
– Fear of the number 13 dates back to Nordic mythology. A later superstition said that if 13 people sat at a table, one would die before the year was out, based on the ‘Last Supper’.
– Walking under a ladder is considered bad luck because a ladder leaning against a wall forms a triangle, and Egyptians believed strongly in the power of pyramids and triangles. To break the triangle was considered very dangerous.
– Fear of black cats also goes back to ancient Egypt where the Goddess Bast was a black female cat.
– Knocking on wood was to keep the evil spirits that lived in it from coming out.
– Saying ‘bless you’ when someone sneezes dates from the 6th century, when it was believed sneezes expelled evil from the body.
• “Mix It Up at Lunch Day”, when kids in school cafeterias are encouraged to swap seats in order to bring together various cliques (jocks, geeks, goths, addicts, juvenile delinquents, etc), a project sponsored by the advocacy group Teaching Tolerance.
NET: http://www.tolerance.org/teens/lunch.jsp
• “Pack Your Mom’s Lunch Day”, when kids with a mother who’s gone back-to-school are encouraged to honor her by making her lunch. (Or could it just be payback for all those peanut butter & baloney sandwiches mom made?)
• “Shallow Persons Awareness Week”, for all those people who believe beauty is only hair deep.
• “World Kindness Day”. (Sponsored by the ‘Global Society of Eternally Hopeless Optimists’.)

SATURDAY –
• “Operating Room Nurse Day”, the highlight of “Operating Room Nurse Week”. (Forceps! Sutcher! Bucket!)
• “Pickle Appreciation Day”, a day to gear up for some tangy, spicy and yummy fun.
• “World Diabetes Day”, recognizing what’s becoming a worldwide epidemic. Since 2000, the number of people worldwide with diabetes has more than doubled. In Canada, there are more than 2 million people with diabetes.
NET: http://www.worlddiabetesday.org
• “World Rock-Paper-Scissors Championships” in Toronto, as ‘RPS’ pros from around-the-world vie for a $10,000 grand prize. The official website includes the “RPS Strategy Guide”.
NET: http://worldrps.com

SUNDAY –
• “World Day of Remembrance for Road Traffic Victims”, an annual World Health Organization observance since 1993 on the 3rd Sunday of November that promotes road safety.
NET: http://www.who.int/roadsafety/projects/world_day/en/index.html

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2000 [09] The Beatles release “1”, a 27-song compilation CD of #1 hits (the last time we got sucked into buying their recycled catalogue … again)

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .

1875 [134] 1st football teams to wear uniforms, Harvard vs Yale (before this … naked?)

1946 [63] 1st ‘Artificial Snow’ created for skiing by Vincent Schaeffer at Mt Greylock, Massachusetts

1952 [57] 1st ‘Press-On Nails’ are marketed (and 1st guy is admitted to ER with gaping back wounds)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .

1995 [14] World’s only known ‘Green Cat’ is confirmed by a veterinary hospital in Copenhagen, Denmark, a condition vets say may be caused by a metabolism defect

AND REMEMBER . . .

[Mon] International Day for Tolerance
[Tues] Homemade Bread Day
[Tues] Janet Jackson’s “Number Ones” / John Mayer’s “Battle Studies” released
[Wed] Married To a Scorpio Support Day
[Thurs] World Toilet Day
[Thurs] Use Less Stuff Day
This Week Is … Hunger & Homeless Awareness Week
This Month Is … Impotency Month

BULL’S BITS


OTHER BS THINGS THAT ARE UNLUCKY BESIDES THE NUMBER 13:
• An ancient superstition warns against opening an umbrella in your shorts.
• It’s testing fate if you try walking under a black cat.
• It’s extremely unlucky to attempt to light 3 firecrackers on a match.
• Break a mirror and you’ll have 7 years of really bad shaves.
• And be forewarned, it’s unlucky to be superstitious.

BS RANDOM JOKE:

Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. “Yes” is the answer.

TRUTH OR BS?

Are the following statements true or just a load of hooey?
• The average human body contains enough plutonium to fuel a nuclear reactor for 3 hours. [BS. But there is enough carbon to make 900 pencils, enough iron to make a 3-inch nail and enough phosphorous for 2,200 match heads!]
• When you sneeze, it can cloud your brain and affect your thinking for up to 40 seconds. [TRUE.  Experts say many car wrecks and industrial accidents are caused by a single sneeze.]
• There’s a species of turtle in Jamaica that can fly. [BS ... unless you score some really potent ganja.]
• The average person will spend 2 weeks of their lifetime waiting for traffic lights to change. [TRUE. Except in Montréal, where you just drive on through.]

BS PHONE STARTER:
What’s the strangest term or pet name you’ve heard for someone’s ‘privates’?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:

Today’s Question: You’ll save $40,000 over the course of a lifetime if you do THIS every day.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Pack your lunch for work.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:

Courage atrophies from lack of use.


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