Wednesday, November 18, 2009        Edition: #4146

Thanks For Being On Our Sheet List!


BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:

46-year-old Johnny Depp has reportedly signed a massive $33 million-plus deal to star in a 4th installment of the “Pirates Of the Caribbean” movie franchise, “Pirates Of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides”, due in 2011 (producers can afford it – the first 3 films grossed over $2.5 billion in worldwide box office) . . . Cable TV operator Comcast is expected to buy a controlling stake in NBC Universal, perhaps as early as this week, bringing the networks NBC, USA, CNBC and The Weather Channel under the umbrella of the company that already owns the Golf Channel and E! Entertainment (how long before one company owns all media?) . . . Wannabe pop star and recent “Dancing With the Stars” contestant Aaron Carter has been hit with a staggering $1 million-plus bill for back taxes owed to the US government (how’s a low-talent guy like that make so much money?) . . . 41-year-old actor Anthony Michael Hall (dweeby ‘Brian’ in 1985 movie “The Breakfast Club”) has been ordered to stay away from his ex-girlfriend after he allegedly attempted to kick down her apartment door, then slammed her head against a wall when she finally let him in (he’s gone from geek to gangsta) . . . Former reality TV star Tila Tequila (“A Shot at Love”) has filed suit against her ex-boyfriend, 265-lb San Diego Chargers football player Shawne Merriman, alleging he choked her and held her captive in his home in September (never date a linebacker or you might get sacked) . . . “NY Post” is reporting that CNN encouraged 64-year-old news anchor Lou Dobbs to leave the cable news network after 29 years by offering him an $8-million severance package (you can bet FOX News has already called him) . . . And 23-year-old “Twilight” actor Robert Pattinson tells Britain’s “Star” magazine that he would consider getting naked onscreen, but only for the right role as it might ‘ruin the illusion’ (which one – that he can act or that he’s good looking?).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:

• “Colbert Report” (Comedy Central/CTV) – Norah Jones (“The Fall”).
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/A Channel) – Carrie Underwood (“Play On”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – 50 Cent (“Before I Self Destruct”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Metric (“Live It Out”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – Avett Bros (“Emotionalism”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Ray Davies (“The Kinks Choral Collection”).
• “Live With Regis & Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – Kris Allen (“Kris Allen”).
• “Lopez Tonight” (TBS) – Amerie (“In Love & War”).
• “So You Think You Can Dance” (FOX/A Channel) – Australian “This Is It” guitarist Orianthi performs (“Believe”); the final 12 dancers are revealed.
• “Tonight Show With Conan O’Brien” (NBC/A Channel) – Brian Setzer (“Songs From Lonely Avenue”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Carrie Underwood – She’s denying a report in “OK! Magazine” suggesting she’s set to move in with her NHL hockey player boyfriend Mike Fisher (Ottawa Senators). Quote from her website: “I would never live with my boyfriend … not my style.”
• Chris Brown – He says he’s been ‘chillin’ on the dating front since he was charged with attacking then-girlfriend Rihanna but he believes ‘women are gonna be around’ when he’s ready to start dating again. (Hopefully only those with martial arts training.)
• David Guetta – Tonight the French producer/DJ, whose album “One Love” has been a huge hit in Europe, kicks off a North American tour in Atlanta GA. Guetta also produced the Black Eyed Peas hit “I Gotta Feeling”.
• Janet Jackson – Tonight “Good Morning America” host Robin Roberts does a special 1-hour primetime interview (10 pm) at her Malibu CA home, the first since brother Michael’s death.
• Madonna – She’s setting up a new Brazilian children’s charity called ‘Success For Kids’ with the help of a $7-million donation from the country’s richest man, Eike Batista.
• The Strokes – The NYC rockers’ 2001 debut album “Is This It” has been named ‘Album Of the Decade’ by British music magazine “NME”. The band’s been on unofficial ‘hiatus’ since 2006.

TRUTH ABOUT IDENTITY THEFT:
Contrary to the popular perception of hackers breaking into mainframe computers and stealing data or our paranoia over revealing personal details online, a new study shows that only about 1-in-10 cases of identity theft involves computers. Fully 43% of cases come from such low-tech means as stolen wallets and documents. The most common method of getting info is to buy it, generally from someone who works for a mortgage company, bank, car dealership, or government agency. Other methods include stealing mail from apartment buildings or businesses such as insurance companies … even ransacking bank trash cans. (What you should worry about more online is those juicy pics posted on Facebook.)
– “Globe & Mail”

BS CUTTING-EDGE VOCAB:
New terms leaking into the lingo …
• ‘Grab-and-Goer’ – A retailing term for a person who dislikes shopping, or does not have much time to shop, and so tends to select items quickly and without much thought. (In Everett WA there was a ‘bikini coffee stand’ called Grab-N-Go … until 5 female employees were charged with prostitution in September.)
• ‘Parahawking’ – A form of paragliding in which the paraglider follows trained birds of prey that can detect thermal updrafts invisible to pilots, thereby allowing them to stay aloft longer. (“The good news is, Martinez managed to glide for 4 hours by following the falcons. The bad news is, the birds decided to have him for lunch.”)
• ‘Pee Bale’ – A straw bale where men relieve themselves. Gardeners at Britain’s government-run Wimpole Hall property are urging the practice to help 400 acres of gardens and parkland grow greener. The 10-ft (3-m) bales are used to activate composting on the estate’s compost heap. (Save the Earth, wee outdoors! “Wee are the world …”)

IF WE COULD TALK TO THE ANIMALS:
Scientsts believes they’ve isolated the gene that enables human speech, one they’ve tagged FOXP2. All animals have it, but the human version differs in just 2 of its 740 components from that of chimpanzees, suggesting that this tiny evolutionary difference might explain why people can talk and chimps cannot. Biologists in Leipzig, Germany have managed to genetically engineer a mouse with FOXP2, causing it to squeak somewhat differently. Should the gene be successfully introduced into a species closer to humans, who knows what might happen? (You know what this means … another “Planet Of the Apes” sequel.)
– “New York Times”

VIRTUAL FITTING ROOM:
Online clothing store Tobi uses the so-called ‘Fashionista’ system to allow you to upload a picture of yourself and then try on different outfits superimposed on that image. Here’s how it works: When you’ve chosen a clothing item you like, you print out a special barcode-like tag and hold it up in front of you while you stand before your webcam. The software then displays an image of the clothing you’re interested in superimposed on your body so you get a rough idea of what you’d look like wearing it. (Hey look, your love handles are hanging out the sides!)
NET: http://www.tobi.com
– FastCompany.com

WATCH OUT, BILL GATES!
Joaquin Guzman Loera is listed as #41 on the new “Forbes” list of the ‘World’s Most Powerful People’. He’s also a drug lord and Mexico’s most-wanted man. Fondly referred to by Mexicans as ‘El Chapo’ or ‘Shorty’, Loera heads up the Sinatoa cartel, one of the biggest suppliers of cocaine to America. His net worth is said to be $1 billion, all of it from drug trafficking. His ranking as 41st most powerful puts him ahead of presidents like Russia’s Dmitry Medvedev, France’s Nicolas Sarkozy, and Venezuela’s Hugo Chavez. (No doubt there are other crooks on the list … just less obvious.)
– Forbes.com

NEW BS GIZMOS & GADGETS:
• Forget the whoopee cushion, pranking has gone hi-tech with the new ‘USB Computer Prankster’. Resembling a regular flashdrive, the joke gadget will turn the caps lock on and off, make random mouse movements, and type out random text on whoever’s computer you plug it into. Handily, it features a time delay setting so you can make your getaway safely before it starts misbehaving. ‘The Prankster’ is highly annoying but designed not to do any permanent damage. (However, your co-worker might inflict life-threatening injury.)
NET: http://tinyurl.com/yk3wfs5
– GeekAlerts.com
• How many times have you been weighing flour when you suddenly had a hankering to hear the soulful vocal stylings of Miley Cyrus? Luckily, a company called Rihanna is working on a $100-kitchen scale due next year, complete with an iPod dock and 2W speaker. Your iPod shows you the song while a black & white LCD displays the weight. Does life get any better than this? (Two things are gonna trash this: Rihanna’s gonna sue and … it’s totally dumb!)
NET: http://tinyurl.com/yeegt9p
– UberGizmo.com

BLAME IT ON THE BOSS:

A recent study by the Chartered Institute of Personnel & Development finds that most people quit their jobs because … they can’t stand the boss! Personality clashes or general dissatisfaction with managers are the biggest reasons for resignations, well ahead of unhappiness about pay or career advancement. The study concludes that managers are too often appointed to their positions because they were good at their previous jobs and little thought is given to their management skills. That often leads to good workers leaving due to weak management. (None of this has anything to do with what’s going on here, of course!)
– Reuters

BS CHRONOMETER 11.18.09


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1939 [70] Margaret (Peggy) Atwood, Ottawa ON, ‘dean of Canadian authors’ (Booker Prize- “The Blind Assassin”, Giller Prize-“Alias Grace”, Governor General’s Award-“The Handmaid’s Tale”)/Companion Of the Order of Canada (1981)/Canada’s Walk of Fame (2001)

1958 [51] Oscar Nunez, Cuba, TV actor (‘Oscar Martinez’ on “The Office” since 2005)

1962 [47] Kirk Hammet, San Francisco CA, rock guitarist/singer (Metallica-“The Day That Never Comes”, “St Anger”)

1968 [41] Owen Wilson, Dallas TX, movie actor (“Marley & Me”, “Wedding Crashers”)/brother of actor Luke Wilson

1979 [30] Fabolous (John Jackson), Brooklyn NY, rapper (f/Ne-Yo-“Make Me Better”, “Breathe”)

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .

• “Educational Support Professionals Day”, an annual salute to all the people who aren’t teachers but still help schools run, ie: technical support, food services, custodial staff, etc.
NET: http://www.nea.org/grants/31675.htm

• “Married To a Scorpio Support Day”, a day of remembrance to honor those who are married to Scorpios. Are they that bad? Any horror stories out there?

• “Mickey Mouse Day”, generally observed as his ‘birthday’ when he appeared in the cartoon short “Steamboat Willie” in 1928 (now making him a geezer mouse of 81!). It was the first cartoon with synchronized sound.

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .

1987 [22] U2 opens for itself, pretending to be a country-rock group called The Dalton Brothers, during a concert in Los Angeles CA

1989 [20] “Love Shack” by the B-52s peaks at #3 on the pop singles chart

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1883 [126] 1st ‘Standard Time Zones’, adopted by railroads in Canada & the USA

1936 [73] George McCullagh’s “Globe” newspaper purchases “The Mail & Empire” and amalgamates them to form the “Globe & Mail” (eventually leads to CTVglobemedia)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1991 [18] Suzanne Ferrer of Loire Valley, France becomes a great-grandmother at age 49 (had her first child at age 16, her daughter gave birth at 17, and her granddaughter at 15)

AND REMEMBER . . .

[Thurs] World Toilet Day
[Thurs] Have a Bad Day Day
[Thurs] Use Less Stuff Day
[Fri] Name Your PC Day
[Sat] World Hello Day
This Week Is … Culinary Week
This Month Is … Alzheimer’s Disease Month

BULL’S BITS


The 2nd film in the “Twilight” franchise, “New Moon”, opens Friday. Here are a few …
BS THINGS WE’D RATHER DO THAN SEE THE NEW “TWILIGHT” MOVIE:
• Eat a breakfast of ‘Frost Broken Glass Flakes’ drenched in sulphuric acid.
• Create a corn maze which reads “Twilight Sucks” when viewed from the air.
• Remove fingernails with Swiss Army Knife then reattach them with salted duct tape.
• Become a taste tester at Miller Brewing.
• Start an Internet rumor that Rob Pattinson has died and they aren’t going to finish the movies because of it.
• Let a real vampire show us what vampiring is all about.
• Dive into a swimming pool filled with double-edged razor blades.
• Drink decaf.
– Adapted from BBSpot.com.

BS RANDOM JOKE:
One good turn gets most of the blankets.

BS ‘TITLE BOUT’:
Have 2 phone contestants play off against each other to come up with the most titles in each category. Let them alternate back and forth until one is stumped, then move on to the next category. Keep a running score. A few suggested categories …
• Titles of U2 songs.
• Names of TV shows.
• Titles awarded to royalty & nobility.
• Animated movie titles.
• Titles awarded in sports championships.
• Titles of ‘Harry Potter’ books.

BS PHONE STARTER:

What do you do to pass the time when marooned in rush-hour traffic? (A recent poll finds the vast majority of us talk to ourselves.)

BS E-MAIL GAME:
While most e-mail addresses in North America end in ‘.com’ (commercial), ‘.edu’ (educational), or ‘.org’ (organization), e-mail addresses in other countries often end in a 2-letter code for the recipient’s country. Canada’s code, for instance, is ‘.ca’. What countries do the following codes stand for?
• ke (Kenya)
• au (Australia)
• cr (Costa Rica)
• nl (Netherlands)
• uk (Britain)
• nz (New Zealand)
• ug (Uganda)
• ae (United Arab Emirates)
• za (South Africa)

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:

Today’s Question: Sales of THIS have doubled in the last year.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Hand sanitizer.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else.


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