Thursday, November 26, 2009        Edition: #4152

More From the Sheethouse!


Tonight cash-strapped actor Nicolas Cage (who’ll seemingly do anything for money these days) officially turns on the holiday lights in Bath, England (NET: . . . Soccer star David Beckham & his LA Galaxy teammates are spending Thanksgiving visiting US troops and their families at an army base in Kaiserslautern, Germany (they’re playing a pickup game today) . . . “High School Musical” star Zac Efron is anxious to leave his cute Disney image behind, saying he’d love a role as a ‘Bond’ movie villain (‘Blohard’?) . . . Hollywood madam Michelle Braun, recently sentenced to 3 years probation for money laundering, claims Hugh Hefner’s “Playboy” Playmates have often worked as high-class ‘escorts’, commanding a $10,000 fee (she’s shopping a book) . . . 51-year-old Ellen DeGeneres is preparing for her debut as an “American Idol” judge in January by taking an online music course (it’ll take a lot of practice to achieve that glazed-eye, vacant facial expression Paula Abdul was so good at) . . . Concert promoter Live Nation is now offering video downloads of live shows at Apple’s iTunes, starting at $7.99 (they gouge you live; they gouge you online) . . . And newlywed reality TV star Khloe Kardashian (“Keeping Up With the Kardashians”) & her basketball star husband Lamar Odom (LA Lakers) have just forked out $4 million on their first marital home (in Southern California, this is known as a ‘starter home’).

• ARIA Awards (Sydney) – AC/DC are nominated for ‘Highest Selling Australian Album’, ‘Best Rock Album’, ‘Best Group’, and ‘Album Of the Year’ at the annual Australian Recording Industry Association Music Awards.
• “Beyoncé … I Am Yours” (ABC) – 1-hour TV special featuring a performance from Las Vegas and previously unseen footage about her life.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Switchfoot (“Hello Hurricane”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Weezer (“Raditude”).
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – Toby Keith (“American Ride”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Shakira (“She Wolf”).
• “Live With Regis & Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – Jennifer Lopez (“Love?”).
• “Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade” (NBC) – The 83rd annual follows a new route through Manhattan, not taking Broadway for the first time in its history. Among those participating: Billy Currington; Kermit the Frog; Reba McEntire; the Broadway casts of “Dreamgirls”, “Ragtime”, and “West Side Story”.
• “Paul McCartney: Good Evening New York City” (ABC) – 1-hour TV special featuring highlights from July’s 3-day concert stand to help christen NYC’s Citi Field.
• “People Of the Year” (NBC) – Some of the year’s top newsmakers discuss how fame has changed their lives. Among them: Country phenom Taylor Swift; ‘Octomom’ Nadya Suleman.
• “Thanksgiving Day Football” (FOX) – A salute to Motown’s 50th anniversary during halftime of the Green Bay Packers/Detroit Lions NFL game features performances by up-and-coming artists.
• “Tonight Show With Conan O’Brien” (NBC/A Channel) – Bon Jovi (“The Circle”).

• Adam Lambert – His appearance on “Good Morning America” (ABC) yesterday was cancelled, apparently due to his controversial performance Sunday night at the “American Music Awards”. (ABC-TV received a reported 1,500 complaints from viewers.)
• Alicia Keys – Her new album, “The Element of Freedom” (out December 15th) includes a duet with Beyoncé and a collaboration with Drake.
• Justin Bieber – The 15-year-old Stratford ON pop sensation tripped and broke a foot while opening for Taylor Swift at Wembley Arena in London UK on Monday. He ignored the pain long enough to complete his song, then limped backstage to seek medical attention. Ever the trouper, he continues to perform this week … while sitting on a stool.
• The Monkees – In an interview on NYC’s WFAN this week, oldies singer Peter Tork (now 67) revealed something he’d never mentioned in public before: He slept with blues legend Janis Joplin. (Was he dressed as a girl at the time?)
• Rihanna – She tells NYC’s HOT 97 that allegations she’s a closet bisexual are untrue. The rumor surfaced after spicy photos surfaced online depicting her groping a female friend. So why’d she do it? Quote: “I don’t have a lot so anytime I see a good rack, I grab ’em.”
• Susan Boyle – Her debut album, “I Dreamed A Dream”, is blowing up way beyond sales expectations. One veteran prognosticator predicts it will sell at least 700,000 copies this week.


A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “Battleship” – Yep, that dull pencil & paper guessing game is being adapted for the bigscreen. It’s slated for a July 2011 release. “Hancock” director Peter Berg is helming. It’s said to be ‘everything you could imagine in a Battleship movie’ … whatever that means.
• “The Gun” – 50 Cent has written the screenplay for this new film in which he plans to co-star with actor Val Kilmer. Production is scheduled to get underway next month. Fiddy and Kilmer worked together previously on the straight-to-DVD movie “Streets Of Blood”.
• “The Lincoln Lawyer” – Tommy Lee Jones has quit his role as actor/director due to ‘creative differences’. The Oscar-winner was set to helm the movie and appear alongside Matthew McConaughey in the adaptation of Michael Connelly’s hit novel. The studio is now looking for another filmmaker and star before production can begin in Spring 2010.
• “Monopoly” – Well if they’re making “Battleship”, they may as well make this one too. Ridley Scott is directing this film about a “Monopoly”-obsessed New Yorker who finds himself pulled into the game’s world by a magical ‘Chance’ card.
• “Real Steel” – 41-year-old Hugh Jackman is set to solidify his status as an action hero in this new Steven Spielberg sci-fi pic, which tells the story of a futuristic boxing industry where robots take over from real fighters. The big-budget film is the first project for Spielberg’s DreamWorks Studio since he cut ties with Paramount Pictures.


A survey of 3,000 women finds that blond women spend an average of 6 minutes longer on their beauty routine each day than brunettes … 72 minutes, compared with 66 minutes. The poll also finds that the average blonde has a better social life, going out with friends 3 times a month, compared to twice for darker-haired females. Researchers found that often it’s the time spent getting ready that gives women a confidence boost … which would explain why blondes are thought to have more fun. (What does a blonde put behind her ears to make herself more attractive? Her ankles.)
– “Daily Telegraph”


This is one myth that never seems to die … birds are NOT dependent on our feeders. In fact, experts estimate that wild birds get less than 25% of their food from birdfeeders. Besides, their urge to migrate is so strong it couldn’t be overridden by the availability of feeder food. Migrating birds probably appreciate an easy meal after a full night of flying. Far from harming birds, you’re doing them a favor by keeping your feeders stocked and your birdbaths full in Autumn. ([Co-host] feeds the birds … to his dog.)
– “Minneapolis Star Tribune”


• ‘Raining Cats & Dogs’: In 17th century England it was common to discard waste in the street … even dead household pets. Once it rained so much that the deceased critters became buoyant and floated along the gutters, inspiring writer Richard Brome in 1651 to predict, “It shall rain dogs and polecats.”
• ‘Never Look a Gift Horse In the Mouth’: In other words, don’t be ungrateful when someone gives you something. You can tell a horse’s age by looking at its teeth, particularly the incisors, but if someone gave you a horse as a gift, it would be considered rude to examine its teeth.
• ‘The Acid Test’: Gold Rush miners tested possible gold nuggets in acid. Unlike other metals, gold won’t corrode in acid, so if the nugget didn’t dissolve it passed the acid test and therefore was deemed pure gold. If a person passes a figurative acid test, they’re telling the truth.
• ‘In the Limelight’: Theater stages used to be illuminated by heating lime (calcium oxide) until it glowed. It has a high melting point and, when heated, gives off a brilliant white light which was then focused into a spotlight. So if an actor was in the limelight, he was certainly the center of attention. (And probably very hot as well.)
– “Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Plunges Into the Universe”


At a theme park in Japan kids fight fires, pursue criminals through the streets, and perform more mundane tasks like making hamburgers and delivering parcels. ‘Kidzania’, in a shopping center in Tokyo, is like a real town where children can act out their dream jobs. The cobbled streets are lined with stores, a bank, even a service station, branded with logos of sponsoring companies. Everything in the town is two-thirds normal size to accommodate pint-size workers. After their parents pay for entry, kids get to work a shift, trying several of the dozens of available jobs. It is all taken very seriously with parents banished to viewing areas. (Hey kids, you can try this at home … imagine the fun of pretending to be a dishwasher!)
– BBC News


Spending time online cuts the incidence of depression among senior citizens by at least 20%, according to new research by the Washington DC-based Phoenix Center for Advanced Legal & Economic Public Policy Studies. (So encourage your granny to surf!)


1939 [70] Tina Turner (Anna Mae Bullock), Nutbush TN, classic rock singer (“What’s Love Got to Do With It”)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1991)

1945 [64] John McVie, London UK, classic rocker (Fleetwood Mac-“Rumours”)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1998)

1972 [37] Chris Osgood, Peace River AB, NHL goaltender (3 Stanley Cups-Detroit Red Wings)

1976 [33] Joe Nichols, Rogers AR, country singer (“Gimme That Girl”, “Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off”)

1981 [28] Natasha Bedingfield, London UK, pop singer (“Unwritten”, “These Words”)

1984 [25] Ben Wysocki, Denver CO, rock drummer (The Fray-“You Found Me”, “How to Save a Life”)


• “Thanksgiving Day” in America, a yearly tradition on the 4th Thursday of November.

• “Tie One On Day”, celebrating the apron and the previous generations of women who have worn one. It was initiated by Ellyn Anne Geisel, author of “The Apron Book”. To participate, tie one on!


1956 [53] 1st edition of TV game show “The Price is Right” (hosts have included Bill Cullen, Bob Barker and, currently, Drew Carey)


1994 [15] The Eagles’ “Hell Freezes Over” (referring to the band’s reunion after 14 years) reaches #1 on album charts

1952 [57] Canada’s 1st English-language hockey telecast as Foster Hewitt calls the play-by-play on CBLT-TV in Toronto (Maple Leafs beat Boston Bruins 2-1)


[Fri] Black Friday
[Fri] Buy Nothing Day
[Fri] Flossing Day
[Sat] Vanier Cup (Québec City)
[Sat] Eid-Al-Adha (Muslim)
[Sun] 2009 Grey Cup (Calgary)
This Week Is … Game & Puzzle Week
This Month Is … Epilepsy Awareness Month


These are real labels from real wines. Makes you wonder: Do they drink it first, then think up the name?
• Grape Brain (Ontario, Canada)
• Toasted Head (California, USA)
• Cardinal Zin (California, USA)
• Golden Beaver (British Columbia, Canada)
• Vampire (Romania)
• Barefoot (California, USA)
• Utter Bastard (France)
• The Devils Hiding Place (Western Cape, South Africa)
• Therapy (British Columbia, Canada)


Which long ago wedding gift are you still using?


Advocacy group ‘World Against Toys Causing Harm’ (WATCH) has just published its 37th annual list of toys that could be dangerous to kids. This year’s list includes: “The Dark Knight Batman Figure”; “Disney-Pixar Wall-E Foam Rocket Launcher”; “Lots to Love Babies”; “Moon Board Pogo Board”; “Spy Gear Viper-Blaster”; and “X-Men Origins Slashin’ Action Wolverine”. It would seem they missed a few, because here’s some …
• “Little Mountie Taser Kit”
• “Ronco’s Pocket Hive”
• “The Used Band-Aid Ball”
• “Roof Ranger Paratrooper Kit”
• “Little Mr Trenchcoat”
• “Mattel’s Cement Floaties”
• “My First Nipple Ring”
• “PMS Barbie” (“Cowering Ken” sold separately).


We’re officially declaring tomorrow the day when you lazy oafs can cross ‘Take down the Christmas lights’ off your to-do list and add ‘Plug in the Christmas lights’.


• What football equipment was made compulsory in 1949?
a. Athletic supporters.
b. Helmets. [CORRECT]
c. Pants.

• Where would you find the Canadian Football Hall of Fame?
a. Toronto.
b. Hamilton. [CORRECT, opened in 1972.]
c. Green Bay.

• The 1962 Grey Cup was postponed by what?
a. Fog. [CORRECT. The final 9 mins, 29 secs were played the next day, when Winnipeg edged Hamilton 28-27.]
b. Power failure.
c. Lack of interest.
– “The 55 Yard Line” / / Slam! Sports

Today’s Question: According to a recent study, we do THIS 50 times a day on average.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Look at our cellphones.


A dry sense of humor is better than slobbering everywhere.

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