Thursday, November 15, 2007        Edition: #3656
Nuthin’ Like a Bull in Your Radio Shop!

 51-year-old Canadian actor Bruce Greenwood (Noranda QC) has been tapped to play ‘Capt Christopher Pike’, first commander of “USS Enterprise” in the new “Star Trek” film directed by JJ Abrams (shooting starts THIS MONTH) . . . A class-action lawsuit has been filed on behalf of anyone who paid $29.95-a-year to join the Miley Cyrus Fan Club, based on its promise that joining would make it easier to get her concert tickets (apparently it doesn’t – “Hannah Montana” tix sold out in 4 minutes in some markets and scalpers are getting up to 5 times face value) . . . 32-year-old B-list actor Dax Shepard has already found a hot new blonde to replace former gf Kate Hudson as he & “Heroes” star Kristen Bell have been stepping out of late (she’s also the uncredited voice of “Gossip Girl”) . . . It’s a great time to have high-end property available in Manhattan as Jessica Alba, Britney Spears, and Jessica Simpson are all house-hunting in the Big Apple . . . Spiky-haired “American Idol” runner-up Blake Lewis has written a love song called “Know My Name” that’s targeted at his celeb crush – actress Natalie Portman (yeah dude, try some of that beat-boxing stuff you do as well – that’ll really impress her!) . . . Oprah Winfrey is distancing herself from reports that she introduced plastic surgeon Dr Jan Adams to Kanye West’s late mother (who died of cosmetic surgery complications), although it is true that Adams has appeared on her show (it hasn’t been a good time lately to be a friend of O’s) . . . Pickering ON-born NHL player Sean Avery (New York Rangers), who broke up with hottie actress Elisha Cuthbert a couple months back, has now reportedly broken up with really rich twin Mary-Kate Olsen – because he cheated on her with – Elisha Cuthbert (2 minutes for high-sticking!) . . . And those clever members of the striking Writers Guild of America are now waving picket signs that read — “Pens down. We won’t even write slogans!” (now that’s hardcore).

• Britney Spears – The shocking news has surfaced that her boys have contracted pinkeye, possibly from the family dog. Meantime, Billy Ray Cyrus (most notable these days as Miley’s dad) has extended an invitation for Britney to share Thanksgiving Day dinner with his family. Aw shucks, thanks … will we have to use you-tensils?
• Celine Dion – She’s revealed she uses AC/DC’s “Thunderstruck” for warm-ups during sound checks for concerts. She says it ‘gets the adrenalin rushing’.
• John Lennon – The president of The Beatles Fan Club in Britain is PO-ed that Yoko Ono has licensed a John Lennon track to be used in an upcoming TV ad for US retailer JC Penney. Pete Nash says Lennon would have told the corporate world to ‘F-off’.
• Katie Armiger – She’s listed in “People” magazine’s ‘Country Special’ issue as one of country music’s hottest new singers. Her next single, “Make Me Believe”, is highlighted as a must-have download.
• Norah Jones – She’ll make her feature film debut in Chinese director Wong Kar Wai’s new film, “My Blueberry Nights”, opening in FEBRUARY. She plays a woman who goes on a cross-country journey in attempt to escape her past. Jude Law, David Strathairn, Rachel Weisz, and Natalie Portman also star.
• Rihanna – She recently confirmed she’s dating movie actor Josh Hartnett (“30 Days of Night“).
• Rolling Stones – Their former manager Andrew Loog Oldham has just completed a movie screenplay based on his biographical books “Stoned” and “2Stoned”. He says the planned biopic may have to rely on sound-alikes because he’s not sure Mick Jagger & Keith Richards will give up rights to their music.

• Boyz II Men – The ‘90s hit-makers are on “Live With Regis & Kelly” (syndicated/CTV).
• John Travolta – He’s honored with the 2nd annual ‘Kirk Douglas Award for Excellence in Film’ at the “Santa Barbara International Film Festival” in California. Seems dressing in drag for “Hairspray” was an excellent career move!
• Maroon 5 – They guest on one of the few US TV talk shows still in production during the writers’ strike, the “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CityTV).

A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “The Human Contract” – Mrs Will Smith, Jada Pinkett Smith, is making her directorial debut with this drama about a free-spirited woman who tempts a successful businessman into reckless love. Pinkett Smith also wrote the script, and her hubby’s an executive producer. The cast includes Jason Clarke (“Brotherhood”) & Paz Vega (“Spanglish”).
• “Jennifer’s Body” – Director Jason Reitman & writer Diablo Cody, the duo behind acclaimed indie hit “Juno”, are teaming up again for this horror comedy about a demonically-possessed cheerleader. The film begins shooting in late winter, starring Megan Fox (“Transformers”).
• “Stones” – Director Ridley Scott (“American Gangster”) will make this big-budget supernatural thriller revolving around the mysterious destruction of ancient religious sites around-the-world. It turns out that Stonehenge is the tie that binds together such artifacts as the Great Pyramids and all of them still have primeval powers. No casting has yet been announced.
• “The Thomas Crown Affair 2” – Dutch director Paul Verhoeven (“Basic Instinct”) is set to helm  this sequel to the 1999 caper comedy. Pierce Brosnan will reprise his role as the world’s most debonair thief and corporate raider. It’s scheduled to begin shooting in JANUARY.
• “Ticket to Ride” – “Gilmore Girls” alum Alexis Bledel has signed on to star in this comedy about a college grad forced to move back to her childhood home with her eccentric family while she attempts to find a job, a guy, and get a life. The project is set to begin shooting NEXT MONTH.

Scientists say that by age 55 most people are only about 75% as capable of learning and remembering new things as at age 25. Why? By late middle age, most of us lose about 1% of our brain volume … per year. (Let’s see, what’s 1% of a pea?)
– ”Fortune Magazine”

A study in the “Journal of Marriage & Family” shows that teens are most likely to lose their virginity in the month of JUNE. The next most popular month is DECEMBER. Researchers says the findings suggest parents and sex educators should therefore discuss the topic with teens just before summer and again ahead of the holiday season. (Like the kids haven’t been talking about it all year anyway.)
– AP

According to a brand new survey, here the top tube personalities of all-time …
5. Walter Cronkite
4. Bill Cosby
3. Oprah Winfrey
2. Lucille Ball
1. Johnny Carson
– “Entertainment Weekly”

Restorers have been able to piece together three 17th-century Chinese vases that were smashed when a museum visitor tripped over his untied shoe. The $600,000 porcelain vases, from the Qing Dynasty, were smashed into hundreds of pieces in 2006, when Nick Flynn crashed into them at the Fitzwilliam Museum in Cambridge, England. After 6 months of tedious work, the vases are restores. (Now let’s just put them back on the shelf using this ladderrrrrr.)
– “NY Post”

According to a management study, there are 3 main types of bosses …
• ‘The Cheerleader’ – Most interested in increasing his or her POPULARITY.
• ‘The Kick-Ass Boss’ – Demands results that increase POWER and reputation.
• ‘The Play-It-Safe Boss’ – Wants to enhance the SECURITY of his or her position.
The trick to advancement, experts say, is to identify which type you have and then respond to their particular needs. (The study will be further outlined in the upcoming book “A Complete Guide to Ass-Kissing”.)
– “Men’s Health”

• A famous dancer in South Korean is facing trial for forging an undergraduate degree to land a job teaching … belly dancing. Ahn Yoo-Jin, popularly known as Xena Ahn, allegedly faked credentials to teach at Kwangju Women’s University but has now been terminated from the job. (When you need a degree to teach belly dancing, the academic nerds have truly taken over!)
• A Malaysian woman who works in construction clearing vegetation from job-sites won’t face charges for lopping off her husband’s family jewels because the judge ruled she had a good excuse – she was sleepwalking and dreaming of whacking weeds. (You’d think the chainsaw would have woken him.)
• NYC councilor Simcha Felder has introduced a proposal calling for a $1,000 fine for anyone who is caught … feeding pigeons. It’s an attempt to curb the effects of the city’s huge flocks, denounced by many as ‘rats with wings’. The councilor notes that a single pigeon produces an average of 25 lbs of excrement per year. And pigeon droppings contain ammonia and uric acids which can corrode city infrastructure. (Not to mention your hat.)

The planet Uranus was originally called ‘George’ (Georgium Sidus), in honor of King George III of Britain.


1940 [67] Sam Waterston, Cambridge MA, TV actor (‘Executive Assistant DA Jack McCoy’ on “Law & Order” since 1994)

1945 [62] Frida Lyngstad, Narvik, Norway, oldies singer (ABBA-“Dancing Queen”, “Waterloo”)  FACTOID: She wed Prince Heinrich Reuss of Plauen in 1992, making her the ‘Serene Highness Princess Anni-Frid Reuss of Plauen’. He died in 1999, then her daughter a year later. Awww!

1956 [51] John Roberts, Toronto ON, TV news correspondent (“American Morning” on CNN, ex-CBS White House reporter, ex-MuchMusic VJ, ex-CJBK London swing jock)

1957 [50] Kevin Eubanks, Philadelphia PA, guitarist/bandleader (“Tonight Show With Jay Leno” since 1995)

1970 [37] Jack Ingram, Houston TX, country singer (“Love You”, “Wherever You Are”)

1974 [33] Chad Kroeger, Hanna AB, rock singer (Nickelback-“Rockstar”, “Photograph”)

1974 [33] Jesse Sandoval, Albuquerque NM, indie rock drummer (The Shins-“Sea Legs”, “Turn on Me”)

• “America Recycles Day”, a day to promote that idea that recycling no only makes sense, it makes a huge difference to our environment, our quality of life, and our country’s future. This year’s motto is : “It All Comes Back to You”.

• “Beaujolais Nouveau Day”, the annual limited release of young Burgundy wines from France as a preview of the year’s grape crop. More than 20 million bottles were trucked to French airports on the weekend, destined for wine enthusiasts in the US, Canada and Japan.

• “Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day”, time to hunt down and throw out that green-crusted pork chop from last summer’s BBQ, the moldy mayo jar, and any other ‘mystery items’ you find. What’s the oddest thing in your fridge?

• “George Spelvin Day” (female variation ‘Georgette’ or ‘Georgina’), commemorating the 1886 invention of the name used on Broadway for actors who have more than one role in a play. The fictitious name has appeared in over 10,000 Broadway programs. The name “Walter Plinge” is similarly used on the British stage.

• “Great American Smokeout”, the 31st annual sponsored by the American Cancer Society each November to help smokers quit cigarettes for at least one day, in hopes they will quit forever.

• “Pack Your Mom’s Lunch Day”, when kids with a mother who’s gone back-to-school  are encouraged to honor her by making her lunch … or could it just be payback for all those peanut butter & baloney sandwiches mom made?

• “Sadie Hawkins Day”, named after the “Li’l Abner” comic strip character ‘Sadie Hawkins, the homeliest gal in the hills’. The tradition that girls can ask boys out on this day was born in the  “Li’l Abner” strip published 70 years ago on November 15, 1937.
NET: (“Li’l Abner” official site)

1926 [81] NBC (National Broadcasting Company) makes its on-air debut

2002 [05] “Harry Potter & the Chamber of Secrets” opens in movie theaters (all-time #10 movie with worldwide box office of $877 million)

2006 [01] Arab news channel al-Jazeera launches international English-language service

1990 [17] Pop duo Milli Vanilli admits they did none of the singing on their Grammy-winning debut album “Girl, You Know It’s True”

2005 [02] Bruce Springsteen celebrates the 30th anniversary of his breakthrough album, “Born to Run”, with the release of a 3-disc box set

1981 [26] At 5-11, Ottawa becomes 1st CFL team to advance to Grey Cup with a losing record

1969 [38] 1st Wendy’s fast-food restaurants open (“Hey look, them burgers is square!”)

1948 [59] Canada’s longest-serving Prime Minister, William Lyon Mackenzie King, retires after 3 terms totalling 22 years

1964 [43] Kansas City Chiefs QB Len Dawson sets record for single-player fumbles in one football game with 7

[Fri] International Day for Tolerance
[Fri] Adoption Day
[Fri] Transgender Day of Remembrance
[Fri] World Day of Remembrance for Road Traffic Victims
[Fri] “Beowulf”; “Love in the Time of Cholera”; “Mr Magorium’s Wonder Emporium” open in movie theaters
[Sat] Farm Joke Day
[Sun] 35th American Music Awards (Los Angeles)
This Week Is … Perioperative Nurses Week
This Month Is … Epilepsy Awareness Month


• “Let’s just be friends.”
• “Let’s just be friends, except when we pass each other on the street.”
• “So, what was your brother’s number?”
• “Hi, is this the ‘Dr Phil’ show?”
• “Who the hell told you size didn’t matter?”

• According to a survey of school-age kids, what’s the #1 worst school food?
a. Mystery meat.
b. Tapioca pudding. [CORRECT]
c. Wiener in a thermos.

• The ‘Snickers’ candy bar is named after what?
a. A pet dog.
b. A teddy bear.
c. A horse. [CORRECT]

• This causes the most arguments in a marriage. What is it?
a. In-laws.
b. Credit card bills. [CORRECT]
c. Nookie.

• According to a recent study of expectant moms, what was the food they craved the most?
a. Nachos. [CORRECT]
b. Chocolate.
c. Pickles & ice cream.

It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye … or their virginity.

Today’s Question: The average employee does THIS 42 minutes per week at work.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: E-mails friends.

You may not be totally perfect, but parts of you are excellent.

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