Wednesday, November 15, 2006        Edition: #3409
Nuthin’ Like a Bull in Your Radio Shop!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
LAST NIGHT Queen Elizabeth II & her hubby Prince Philip attended the premiere of the new ‘Bond’ film, “Casino Royale”, in London’s Leicester Square (opens wide FRIDAY) . . . TODAY the Arab news channel al-Jazeera is scheduled to launch an international English-language service, originating from Doha, Qatar; Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia; London UK; and Washington DC (in many countries it will only be available online due to an inability to find cable or satellite distribution deals) . . . TONIGHT hometown rapper TI takes home 3 awards and newly unemployed Jermaine Dupri wins ‘Producer of the Year’ as the inaugural “BET Hip-Hop Awards” air from Atlanta (pre-recorded SUNDAY) . . . TONIGHT the TV drama “Day Break” debuts (ABC), starring Taye Diggs as a detective framed for murder who keeps living the same horrific day over and over again (filling the hole left by “Lost”, which has gone away until FEBRUARY) . . . And the lawsuits just keep on comin’ – now gypsies in the village of Glod, Romania are suing the producers of mega-hit mockumentary “Borat”, claiming they were duped into making fools of themselves during shooting, ie: allowing farm animals into their homes (this film needs to make a couple-hundred mill just to pay off all the PO-ed participants!) . . . Anna Nicole Smith is looking for another house in the Bahamas after the owner of her present property, G Ben Thompson, has had the electricity shut off in a bid to evict her (what a life – lost son, collapsed lung, and now homeless!) . . . And the movie version of “Dallas” may be in trouble as reports swirl that the original script has been scrapped and John Travolta is now the only cast member still attached to star in it (someone needs to pull the plug and put this long-languishing lame idea out of its misery).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Alan Jackson – TODAY he’s on daytime TV’s “The View” (ABC/CTV).
• Brad Paisley – He’s already written some songs for a new album which he’ll start later THIS MONTH. He says writing good songs is the first step to putting on a good show.
• Evanescence – Amy Lee has been named the Epilepsy Foundation’s chairwoman for its “Out of the Shadows” campaign, an effort to increase awareness about epilepsy, raise funds for research and end discrimination with those who have epilepsy. Lee says she’s committed to the cause because epilepsy affects someone very dear to her, although she won’t reveal who.
• Guns N’ Roses – TONIGHT their “Chinese Democracy Tour” is scheduled to invade Canada, playing Toronto’s Air Canada Centre, then moving on to Scotiabank Place in Ottawa FRIDAY. Presumably it’s okay to drink Jagermeister onstage in this country.
• John Legend – TODAY he appears on both the “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CityTV) and “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC).
• +44 [‘Plus Forty-Four’] – TONIGHT Travis Barker’s new group does “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS).
• Shakira – She’s donating the proceeds from TONIGHT’s concert in Bogota to build an arts school for more than 1,800 kids who were forced to flee their homes as a result of Colombia’s civil war.
• Tenacious D – TONIGHT Jack Black’s band flogs their new movie (out FRIDAY) on “Late Night With Conan O’Brien” (NBC).
• Xzibit – TONIGHT he guests on “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC).

WORLD MUSIC AWARDS:
TONIGHT in London UK, Lindsay Lohan hosts the annual music biz awards show that selects winners based on worldwide record sales. A few highlights …
• 48-year-old Michael Jackson is scheduled to come out of seclusion to accept a ‘Diamond Award’ (for global sales of more than 100 million albums) and to perform his biggest hit, “Thriller”, to celebrate its 25th anniversary.
• In 1982, “Thriller” won 8 Grammy Awards and became one of the all-time best-sellers, selling over 50 million copies. Along with the title track, the album included “Billie Jean” and “Beat It”.
• Computer hackers have reportedly swiped the 200 tickets that Michael Jackson had reserved for his performance.
• Michael Jackson’s costumes for the show were put together by designer Roberto Cavalli.
• Other performances by Beyoncé, Mary J Blige, and Andrea Bocelli.
• Monaco hosted the “World Music Awards” for 15 years before it moved to Las Vegas in 2004 and 2005.

BS BUZZWORDS:
New cutting-edge vocab …
• C-U-V – A vehicle that resembles an S-U-V but is built on a car chassis instead of a truck chassis, and is therefore smaller and more fuel efficient, while still offering more room and better traction than a car. (They used to be called station wagons.)
• Government Name – Your legal birth name, usually kept well under wraps by rappers. (TI’s government name is Clifford Harris Jr; Chamillionaire’s is Hakeem Seriki; and Busta Rhymes’ GN is the wussy-sounding Trevor Smith.)
• Reggaeton [‘ray-gay-TONE’] – A music genre that mixes Spanish-language rap, reggae and Latin American sounds. Its distinguishing rhythm is known as ‘Dem Bow’, invented by Jamaican record producer Bobby ‘Digital’ Dixon for Shabba Ranks.

MAO OR LESS:
Andy Warhol’s paintings are famously lucrative, given his continuing influence in what remains of the ‘Pop Art’ movement, and so it comes as little surprise that his iconic image of Chairman Mao is expected to sell for upwards of $12 million when it is sold at auction in NYC TODAY. The hand-painted and silk-screened canvas portrait has been described by Christies, which is auctioning it, as possessing ‘staggering wall-power’. Completed in 1972, it was Warhol’s first overtly political piece.
– “Flash Art News”

ERODING EUROS:
In Germany, there’s a growing problem of 50-euro banknotes crumbling shortly after their withdrawal from cash machines. Banking officials say about 1,500 of the notes have disintegrated so far. What’s causing it? Investigators have found that sulfates used in the production of the drug crystal methamphetamine may be the culprit. It seems when they’re mixed with human sweat they form sulphuric acid, causing banknotes to corrode. And all of that happens when druggies snort the powdered crystals through … rolled-up banknotes. (Talk about blowing through your money!)
– “Der Spiegel”

BS LAW & DISORDER:
• In Brazil, a 21-year-old woman in Belo Horizonte says she has no doubt it was a miracle she survived after her enraged 48-year-old ex-husband shot her in the head … 6 times. A medical examination shows that none of the half-dozen .32-caliber bullets penetrated her skull. Now that’s one hard-headed woman!
• In Wisconsin, a woman in Sheboygan has been caught trying to buy a pack of cigarettes and some potato chips with a counterfeit $20-bill at a gas station. The cashier easily spotted the bogus bill immediately … because it was completely blank on one side. Much like the perp’s brain.
• In Germany, thieves broke through a stone wall and barbed wire fence to pull off a heist involving … 6 hives containing thousands of bees. Police in the town of Ratingen say the job was likely pulled off by professionals. Who’d wanna steal bees? Seen the price of honey lately? It’s liquid gold! Police are asking people to be alert for anyone with lots of red welts.
• In Kansas City, an experiment to see if the color pink calms jail inmates has been declared a failure. Scientific research had suggested that pink jails make inmates less aggressive. However, when put into practice it didn’t seem to have any discernible effect on prisoners … but it really annoyed employees.

CRUISING FOR CHICKS:
A matchmaking cruise that aims to help male millionaires and beautiful women find each other will take place on the Huangpu River in Shanghai, China NOVEMBER 25th. Half of the men who’ve registered are worth more than 200 million yuan ($25 million), 10 times the minimum requirement. For women to qualify, they must be ‘good-looking and desirable’. The organizer says the idea for a cruise came up because rich men are normally very busy, and most of the women they meet are through their businesses, which they consider to be unsuitable for relationships. (You know, ‘working girls’.)
– “China Daily”

SCARIEST MEDICAL MISHAPS:
The most terrifying medical blunders that can happen to you …
• Waking Up During Surgery: It’s rare but it does happen to 1 or 2 of every 1,000 patients, according to the American Society of Anesthesiologists.
• Objects Left In The Body: Leaving medical apparatus inside the body cavity (scissors, gauze, etc) after surgery is one of the most common blunders that can happen to a patient who undergoes an operation.
• Wrong Site Surgery: The problem of surgeons operating on the wrong body location, amputating healthy limbs, or operating on the wrong body altogether, is said to be getting worse.
• Dirty Doctors: Hard to believe, but doctors, even infectious disease specialists, often fail to wash their hands, spreading germs from one patient to another.
• Prescription Errors: Prescribing incorrect medications with similar sounding or looking names is on the rise, with dire and sometimes fatal results.
• Being Buried Alive: It almost never happens anymore but the fear of mistakenly being declared dead and waking up inside a coffin 6-feet-under is one of the most terrifying. Thanks to “CSI”?
• Cosmetic Screw-Ups: Many patients have been disfigured due to poorly performed cosmetic surgery procedures. Just last year, for instance, it was found that dozens of doctors had been using an unapproved form of botulism toxin to smooth patient’s wrinkles, instead of the more expensive Botox.
– scienceagogo.com

HOUSEWORK HINTS:
Australian mom Brigitte Hinneberg has compiled a new household organizer book entitled “Did You Remember the Milk?”. A few of her tips for busy people …
• Do a bit of housework every day. It saves time and effort later and it stops chores growing.
• Spray some cleaner on shower walls 20 minutes before you get in, then wipe it while you clean yourself.
• The least-organized person is the one who has most trouble discarding accumulated clutter. Getting rid of stuff halves housework.
• Put cleaning chores in your diary. (“Dear Diary: Today I didn’t dust again …”)
– “Globe & Mail”

DID YOU KNOW?
• You can’t kill yourself by holding your breath.
• Your heart beats over 100,000 times a day.
• Right-handed people live, on average, 9 years longer than left-handed people.
– “Amazing But Useless Facts”

AND WE QUOTE:
“I don’t hate the guy. I think he made an idiot of himself.”
– Britney Spears’ idiot first husband Jason Alexander telling “Extra” how he feels about her idiot second husband, Kevin Federline.

THE BULL SHEET 11.15.06

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1940 [66] Sam Waterston, Cambridge MA, TV actor (‘Executive Assistant DA Jack McCoy’ on “Law & Order” since 1994)

1945 [61] Frida Lyngstad, Narvik, Norway, oldies singer (ABBA-“Dancing Queen”, “Waterloo”)

1956 [50] John Roberts, Toronto ON, TV news correspondent (CNN, ex-CBS White House reporter)

1957 [49] Kevin Eubanks, Philadelphia PA, guitarist/bandleader (“Tonight Show With Jay Leno” since 1995)

1970 [36] Jack Ingram, Houston TX, country singer (“Love You”, “Wherever You Are”)

1974 [32] Chad Kroeger, Hanna AB, rock singer (Nickelback-“Rockstar”, “Photograph”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “America Recycles Day”, because almost everything can be recycled … except the planet.
NET: http://www.americarecyclesday.org/home.html

• “Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day”, time to hunt down and throw out that green-crusted pork chop from last summer’s BBQ, the moldy mayo jar, and any other ‘mystery items’ you find. What’s the oddest thing in your fridge?

• “George Spelvin Day” (female variation ‘Georgette’ or ‘Georgina’), commemorating the 1886 invention of the name used on Broadway for actors who have more than one role in a play. The fictitious name has appeared in over 10,000 Broadway programs. The name “Walter Plinge” is similarly used on the British stage.

• “Pack Your Mom’s Lunch Day”, when kids with a mother who’s gone back-to-school  are encouraged to honor her by making her lunch … or could it just be payback for all those peanut butter & baloney sandwiches mom made?

• “Sadie Hawkins Day”, named after the “Li’l Abner” comic strip character ‘Sadie Hawkins, the homeliest gal in the hills’. The tradition that girls can ask boys out on this day was born in the  “Li’l Abner” strip published November 15, 1937.
NET: http://www.lil-abner.com/sadiehawk.html (“Li’l Abner” official site)

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1926 [80] NBC (National Broadcasting Company) makes its on-air debut (‘Must-Hear Radio!’)

2002 [04] “Harry Potter & the Chamber of Secrets” opens in movie theaters (all-time #10 movie with worldwide box office of $877 million)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1990 [16] Pop duo Milli Vanilli admits they did none of the singing on their Grammy-winning debut album “Girl, You Know It’s True”

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1981 [25] At 5-11, Ottawa becomes 1st CFL team to advance to Grey Cup with a losing record

1969 [37] 1st Wendy’s fast-food restaurants open (“Hey look, them burgers is square!”)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1948 [58] Canada’s longest-serving Prime Minister, William Lyon Mackenzie King, retires after 3 terms totalling 22 years

1964 [42] Kansas City Chiefs QB Len Dawson sets record for single-player fumbles in one football game with 7

COMING UP . . .
[Thurs] Great American Smokeout
[Fri] Take A Hike Day
[Fri] Homemade Bread Day
[Fri] Farm Joke Day
[Sat] TomKat wedding (Italy)
[Sun] 94th Grey Cup (Winnipeg)
This Week Is … Preoperative Nurse Week
This Month Is … Epilepsy Awareness Month

BULL’S BITS

ACTUAL TABLOID HEADLINES:
• “Taco Vendor Turns Tiny Visitors’ Abandoned Spacecraft into an Alien Sombrero!”
• “Don’t Say ‘Damn the Torpedoes’: Unexploded Munitions Threaten Souls in Hell!”
• “Telephone Psychic Knows You’re Making Fun of Her!”
• “New Line of Four-Dimensional Clothing Can’t Be Worn Inside Out!”
• “Surprise-Party Death Rate at an All-Time High!”
– “Weekly World News”

BS BLATANT JOKE:
It’s time we stopped blaming our problems on people in the past, and started blaming them on people in the future. After all, people in the future have time travel. Why aren’t they coming back to help us?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: Most men say this annoys them when the mother of their child does THIS.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Talks baby talk.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Two people shorten a road.


Printer Friendly Version