Monday, November 29, 2010        Edition: #4396
BS Monthly Planning Calendar in Tomorrow’s Edition!

• 47-year-old movie star Johnny Depp has banned phones from his home in France in order to ensure his family time is uninterrupted. Depp shares a country estate with longtime partner Vanessa Paradis and their 2 children. He says spending private family time in France has calmed him down and helped him stop worrying about things that aren’t really important. (Not just pretty … smart!)
• According to a producer pal, Lindsay Lohan won’t be short of job opportunities once she leaves rehab as she has ‘a mountain of scripts to choose from’. Even though she’s lost her role in “Inferno: A Linda Lovelace Story” because she’s said to be ‘uninsurable’, Ethan Terra says that’s not true … all she has to do is put up a fee as a bond which would be returned upon completion of a project. (The problem may be she hasn’t any moolah left to ‘self-insure’.)
• Justin Timberlake is said to be mounting a major campaign to convince Academy Awards voters he’s worthy of an Oscar nomination for “The Social Network”, in which he played Facebook co-founder Sean Parker. Sony Pictures is footing the bill for the campaign, but Justin is reportedly making his own efforts, including attending screenings and reaching out to past award winners for campaigning advice. (Can you tell the music career has dried up?)
• They’ve been dating less than a year but it seems movie star Halle Berry is already putting pressure on her French actor-boyfriend Olivier Martinez for a baby. The actress says she’d love to give daughter Nahla a sibling but is worried that, at 44, she’s running out of time. (Besides, she likes to have a souvenir from each boyfriend.)
• Meanwhile, Halle’s ex, 34-year-old Canadian model/restaurateur Gabriel Aubry, is still going strong with 30-year-old reality TV star Kim Kardashian (“Keeping up With the Kardashians”). They’ve been spotted on their 2nd date in just a week. He must really like her … he sat through “Burlesque”. (A true test!)
• And poor little rich girl Emma Watson (“Harry Potter’s” ‘Hermione Granger’) is worried her wealth will keep her single. She tells Britain’s “Daily Telegraph” she fears her estimated $33 million-fortune will put off potential boyfriends because money can  make men feel uncomfortable and complicate relationships. (Easy solution: Find a guy with even more money!)
– Jam! ShowBiz

• “CMA Country Christmas” (ABC) – Tonight Jennifer Nettles (Sugarland) hosts this 90-minute TV special as a slew of country artists (Brad Paisley, Darius Rucker, Little Big Town, Martina McBride, Rascal Flatts, Reba McEntire, Sheryl Crow) perform in Nashville’s Bridgestone Arena.
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Kid Cudi (“Man On The Moon 2: The Legend of Mr Rager”).
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/A Channel) – Rascal Flatts (“Nothing Like This”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Nicki Minaj (“Pink Friday”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Kate Nash (“Made of Bricks”).
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – Michael Franti & Spearhead (“The Sound of Sunshine”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – Elvis Costello (“National Ransom”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/Omni) – Comedian/actor/musician/author Steve Martin (“An Object of Beauty: A Novel”).
• “Lopez Tonight” (TBS) – 3OH!3 (“Streets of Gold”).
• “Today Show” (NBC): Michael Bublé (“Crazy Love Hollywood Edition”).
• “Unanswered Prayers” (Lifetime) – Premiere of a made-for-TV movie inspired by Garth Brooks’ 1990 country hit about a happily-married father whose life changes when the woman of his high school dreams returns to town. The film stars Eric Close & Samantha Mathis.
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Susan Boyle (“The Gift”).

• Annie Lennox – The 55-year-old, twice-divorced singer (“A Christmas Cornucopia”) tells “Saga” magazine ‘men are a huge disappointment in relationship terms for 90-to-95% of women’. She says her life would have been easier if she was gay. (She’s not? There’s news!)
• Black Eyed Peas – They’re now confirmed as the halftime entertainment at “Super Bowl 45”, February 6th in Dallas TX. Tomorrow the Peas release their new album, “The Beginning”, and fans who purchase it have a chance to attend the halftime show as a ‘special guest’.
• Brad Paisley – “Anything Like Me” tops this week’s “Billboard” magazine ‘Country Songs’ chart.
• Carrie Underwood – Two fans who bid $24,000 apiece at a charity auction have been named co-winners of a dinner for 8 with her & Ottawa Senators hockey player-hubby Mike Fisher at an Ottawa-area restaurant.
• Justin Bieber – Friday circa 2,000 fans descended on a NYC Barnes & Noble store for a book-signing of his new tome “First Step 2 Forever”. Beibs pleased the babes after arriving late due to traffic by staying overtime and signing an extra thousand books. (At least, that’s the spin.)
• Madonna – Today in Mexico City she’s opening the first of a planned chain of gyms called ‘Hard Candy Fitness’. She’s scheduled to personally be on hand to christen the 30,000 sq ft facility. 10 additional clubs are in the planning stages.
• Taylor Swift – She & actor Jake Gyllenhaal (“Love & Other Drugs”) have further fueled rumors they are a couple after reportedly spending Thanksgiving together in NYC, then heading to Nashville, where she now lives, on Saturday.
• Willie Nelson – He’s free on $2,500 bond after being busted for possession of 6 ounces of marijuana found aboard his tour bus Friday in West Texas. A police officer in Sierra Blanca reportedly smelled pot wafting out from an open door.

2010’S TOP TOYS:
Toy industry observers say there just isn’t a dominant toy in demand this holiday season. The makers of last year’s coveted Zhu Zhu Pets have a new version, but so far there haven’t been any reports of fisticuffs over the last one on a store shelf. Parents seem to be looking for toys with lasting value and with some kind of thinking component. That may be why there seems to be a trend toward toys with a bit of old-fashioned appeal. Among those recommended …
• ‘Foam Master Pogo Stick’, a new version of the toy that’s been around since 1920.
• ‘Glow Crazy Distance Doodler’, a lightwand that makes glow-in-the-dark doodles on walls.
• ‘Honeybake Tea Set’, with good old-fashioned teapot, cups, and saucers.
• ‘Lalaloopsy Doll’, which resembles a toddler with an innocent face rather than a fashion model.
• ‘Lego Minotaurus’, a new board game from the building blocks maker.
• ‘Moon Dough Barn’, molding dough that’s touted to never dry out.
• ‘YBIKE’, a mini-bike that introduces 2-to-4-year-olds to cycling without the difficulty of pedaling.

A BS compendium of recent ‘discoveries’ …
• Scientists say … prolonged or heavy use of marijuana hinders an individual’s ability to respond to rapidly changing situations. That’s the conclusion of a new Harvard Medical School study that measured people’s performance on a sorting test. (Marijuana users had trouble concentrating on … look, a cloud shaped like a Dorito!)
• Scientists say … women sleep less soundly when they share a bed with a romantic partner, according to a study in the journal Sleep & Biological Rhythms. Men, on the other hand, actually sleep better when they’re next to someone. (Especially about 4 seconds after sex.)
• Scientists say … toads are actually frogs. In fact, in some languages just one word is used for both, such as ‘boto’ in the Fiji Islands and ‘padda’ in Afrikaans. (In some whereabouts there’s only one word for ‘men’ and ‘pigs’.)

Highlights of a Career Builder survey on employee absences …
• 45% of managers have caught an employee calling in sick with a fake excuse.
• 32% of employees admit they’ve called in sick when they felt fine.
• 27% of employers have fired employees for using bogus excuses to miss work.
• 10%  of employees say they fake sick 3 or more times per year.
Reasons for mental health days range from ‘running errands’, to ‘unbreakable plans with family and friends’, to ‘housework’ and ‘relaxation’. (How about the truth … ‘I don’t wanna work’?)

• North and South Korea have technically been at war for decades, because no peace treaty was signed in 1953 after the Korean War.
• A man’s sex drive is lowered whenever his favorite sports team loses.
• Donald Trump’s hair is real.
– BBC News


1954 [56] Joel Coen, Minneapolis MN, movie producer/director/screenwriter (“No Country for Old Men”, “Fargo”)/brother of filmmaking partner Ethan Coen/married to actress Frances McDormand since 1984  COMING UP: “True Grit”, starring Jeff Bridges, Josh Brolin, and Matt Damon (opening December 22nd).

1955 [55] Howie Mandel, Toronto ON, TV personality (“America’s Got Talent” 2010, “Deal or No Deal” 2005-09)/stand-up comedian/TV actor (“St Elsewhere” 1982-88)

1961 [49] Kim Delaney, Philadelphia PA, TV actress (‘Claudia Joy Holden’ on “Army Wives” since 2007, “CSI: Miami” 2002, “NYPD Blue” 1995-2003)

1961 [49] Tom Sizemore, Detroit MI, movie actor (“Black Hawk Down”, “Saving Private Ryan”)/drug rehab vet/convicted of domestic violence against Heidi Fleiss (1993)

1964 [46] Don Cheadle, Kansas City MO, movie actor (“Hotel Rwanda”, “Ocean’s Eleven” movies)/UN Environment Program Goodwill Ambassador

1968 [42] Jonathan Knight, Dorchester MA, pop singer (New Kids On the Block-“Step by Step”, “Hangin’ Tough”)  BS FACTOID: NKOTB will tour with Backstreet Boys in Summer 2011. Why? Groupies that were 12 when they were popular are now a legal 32!

1972 [38] Brian Baumgartner, Atlanta GA, TV actor (‘Kevin Malone’ on “The Office” since 2005)

1976 [34] Anna Faris, Baltimore MD, movie actress (“The House Bunny”, “Scary Movie” films)  UP NEXT: The animated family film “Yogi Bear”, opening December 17th.

1979 [31] The Game (Jayceon Terrell Taylor), LA CA, rapper (“How We Do”, “Hate It or Love It”)

• “Cyber Monday”, the online version of “Black Friday”, when Internet retailers offer special deals and deep discounts in an attempt to jumpstart the holiday shopping season.

• “Electronic Greetings Day”, another excuse to junk up other people’s email, text messaging, voicemail, etc with useless chaff you’d never think of writing down on a piece of paper.

• “International Day of Solidarity With the Palestinian People”, sponsored by the United Nations.

• “Square Dance Day”, a chance to get out and ‘dosey-doe’ with your partner.

2001 [09] George Harrison of The Beatles dies  in LA of cancer at age 58

1775 [235] 1st ‘Invisible Ink’ invented by Sir James Jay (but how can we be sure?)

1975 [35] The name ‘Micro-soft’ (a conjunction of ‘microcomputer software’) is 1st used in a letter from Bill Gates to Microsoft co-founder Paul Allen

1965 [45] 21-year-old University of Georgia senior Dale Cummings begins a record 14,118 consecutive sit-ups (beating my old record of … 8-and-a-half)

[Tues] Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree Lighting (NYC)
[Tues] Computer Security Day
[Tues] Meth Awareness Day
[Tues] Stay Home Because You’re Well Day
[Tues] “Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show” (CBS)
[Wed] “Grammy Nominations Concert Live” (CBS)
[Wed] World Aids Day
[Wed] Hanukkah begins (Jewish)

Better Conversation Week / Cookie Cutter Week / Family Week / Game & Puzzle Week / Recipe Greetings For the Holidays Week / Tolerance Week


A highlight bit culled from 17 years of Bull Sheet back issues …
• You ask him where his bike is and he explains he’s actually riding it.
• In the middle of the night you catch him downloading pics … from the KFC website.
• Her participation in schoolyard ‘Red Rover’ contest results in casualties.
• Instead of a teddy bear, she sleeps with a cheeseburger.
• Greenpeace blocks anyone who comes near him.
• Whenever he walks around in new corduroys, neighbors yell, “Hey! Keep it down!”
• When you drive by McDonald’s on the way to school, the staff comes out to wave.
• Mall Santa says, “Off my lap, Tubby!”

You run down the list while a crew member/guest/phone caller decides which choice is more palatable. Would you rather …
• Know your own future -OR- know the future of friends & family and not be able to tell them?
• Be covered in itchy scabs -OR- have popcorn hulls stuck in between all your teeth?
• Eat a bucket full of apple stems -OR- eat 20 banana peels?
• Have to kill ‘Winnie the Pooh’ -OR- ‘Bambi’?
• Eat 10 live earthworms -OR- lay perfectly still for 1 hour in a box filled with them?
• Find out your significant other has a huge crush on your best friend -OR- have them absolutely hate each other?
• Have 5 bottles stuck on the fingers of your hand for a year -OR- a bucket stuck on your foot for a year?
• As a woman, have quadruplets -OR- have 4 babies, each 10 months apart?
• Share the interior of your home with a 1,500-lb dairy cow -OR- with 2 free-roaming seagulls?
• Always lose -OR- never play?

Need a fundraising idea for a local charity? The UK’s ‘I Can’ initiative has launched an ‘Adopt a Word’ campaign, whereby participants get to pick a word they love and ‘own’ it by making a donation. OK, who’s first to adopt ‘pus’? (Can you charge a fee whenever someone uses your word?)

What childhood game or toy do you remember most fondly?

I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and 6 months later … you have to start all over again.

Today’s Question: At the age of 30, men tend to neglect THIS more while women tend to pay more attention to it.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Their closest friendship.

When you’re over the hill, you pick up speed.

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