Tuesday, October 5, 2004        Edition: #2880
Sheet Happens!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TONIGHT, CTV’s “Corner Gas” starring Brent Butt begins its 2nd season, with 18 new episodes planned instead of just 12 (the funniest show on Canadian TV?) . . . Young girls swoon! – word has it actor Orlando Bloom has proposed to actress-girlfriend Kate Bosworth, presenting her with a $300,000 engagement ring . . . Longtime solo actress Nicole Kidman has reportedly been on a string of secret dates with multi-millionaire New Zealander Eric Watson, whom she met in LA where she’s filming her latest movie “Bewitched” . . . Victoria Gotti’s 3 sons in “Growing Up Gotti” (the so-called ‘Gotti Hotties’) will soon market ‘Gotti Gel’ so you too can have that hard hair look . . . Angelina Jolie is considering auctioning off her “Girl, Interrupted” Oscar to raise cash for children’s charities . . . Actress Sharon Stone is covered in red blotches after an allergic reaction to a spray-on tan and promises “Next time I’ll try new treatments on my finger before going in for the full Monty!” . . . 3rd-season “American Idol” finalist George Huff has signed with Word Records and will release a Christmas EP in NOVEMBER . . . “People: magazine claims Jennifer Lopez wears a wig which sits on top of her real hair to make it appear thick and beautiful . . . And the buzz in Tinseltown is now that Britney Spears is actually going through with the ‘real wedding’ on OCTOBER 16th in Santa Barbara as planned all along (okay, we’ll say it … UNCLE!!!!!!).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Gretchen Wilson – You can get into her jeans, the one’s she wore in the “Redneck Woman” video that is. They’ve been autographed by her, Kid Rock & Hank Williams Jr and put up for auction in eBay’s charity section to benefit ‘Max It Out for Meningitis’.
• Bjork – She’s turned down an offer of her own island from the government of her native Iceland because she doesn’t want to become a tourist attraction.
• Eminem – He’s bought a house in LA so he can concentrate on developing a movie career. The $5.4-million mansion reportedly has marble flooring, hi-tech electronics throughout and stunning views of Hollywood.
• LeAnn Rimes – TODAY she appears on ABC-TV’s daytime talk show “The View”.
• Red Hot Chili Peppers – In his just-released autobiography “Scar Tissue”, frontman Anthony Kiedis says he lost his virginity when he was 12 … to his father’s girlfriend!
• Elton John – He says he’ll leave his $350-million fortune to his 10 godchildren when he dies, including the kids of pals Elizabeth Hurley and David & Victoria Beckham.

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “Fahrenheit 9/11″ (R-rated Documentary – DVD/VHS): Michael Moore’s view on what happened to the USA after 9/11 and how the Bush administration allegedly used the tragic event to push forward its ruthless agenda. One of the most controversial and provocative films of the year, and the all-time highest-grossing documentary at over $113 million in box office. Also the 2nd-ever documentary to win the ‘Palm d’Or’ at the “Cannes Film Festival”.
• “Saved!” (PG-13 Comedy – DVD): A girl attending a Christian high school becomes pregnant and finds herself ostracized as all her former friends turn on her. Stars Jena Malone, Mandy Moore and (a sure sign of a bad film) Macaulay Culkin.
• Also on DVD – Disney’s “Aladdin – Platinum Edition”, “The Dame Edna Experience: Complete Collection” and, just in time for Halloween, “Friday the 13th: From Crystal Lake to Manhattan – The Ultimate DVD Collection”.

‘WINNING’ IDEAS:
This year’s “Ig-Nobel Awards” have been handed out at Harvard University. The satirical alternative to the Nobel Prizes honors thinkers who are either eccentrically brilliant or brilliantly eccentric. In other words, it honors truly wacky research. Among the honorees …
• Medicine – A study showing the link between country music and suicide by Steven Stack of Wayne State University & James Gundlach of Auburn University.
• Public Health – Chicago high school student Jillian Clarke for investigating the ‘5-Second Rule’ about whether it’s safe to eat food that has fallen on the floor.
• Physics – Ramesh Balasubramaniam of University of Ottawa & Michael Turvey of Connecticut University for carrying out an exhaustive mathematical study of … hula hooping.
• Chemistry – Coca-Cola Co for taking water from the Thames River in England and magically converting it into ‘Dasani’, a so-called mineral water which eventually had to be withdrawn from the market for precautionary reasons.
• Psychology – Daniel Simons of Illinois University & Christopher Chabris of Harvard for  demonstrating that when people pay close attention to one thing they can be made to overlook anything going on nearby … including a man dressed in a gorilla suit.
• Literature – The American Nudist Research Library at Kissimmee FL for preserving a cheeky slice of history.
• Biology – Researcher Robert Batty of Oban, Scotland who demonstrated the ability of herring to communicate by releasing bubbles of gas.
• Engineering – Florida’s Frank Smith and son Donald for patenting the ‘comb-over’, the clever technique of covering a bald spot by pulling hair over it from the side.
• Peace Prize – Daisuke Inoue of Hyogo, Japan for inventing the Karaoke machine.
– “Independent”      

A LITTLE HELP FROM HIS LITTLE FRIEND:
Boston Red Sox pitcher Pedro Martinez is creating controversy by carrying around the self-proclaimed ‘World’s Smallest Actor’, Nelson de la Rosa, claiming the little guy’s a good luck charm. Critics say that’s demeaning to 28-inch de la Rosa, who appeared in 1996′s “The Island of Dr Moreau”, starring Marlon Brando.
– “E! Online”

BIZARRE-NAMED BABIES:
Why is it the rich and famous have a penchant for giving their children bizarre names? A few of the strangest, according to a new poll …
1. ‘Moon Unit’ (Thanks to later rocker Frank Zappa & his wife Gail.)
2. ‘Fifi Trixibelle’ (Rocker Bob Geldof & UK TV personality Paula Yates)
3. ‘Satchel’ (Actress Mia Farrow & director Woody Allen)
4. ‘Apple’ (Actress Gwyneth Paltrow & Coldplay singer Chris Martin)
5. ‘Daisy Boo’ (TV chef Jamie Oliver & wife Julia)
Others cited include ‘Rumer’ (Demi Moore/Bruce Willis), ‘Rocco’ (Madonna/Guy Ritchie), ‘Maddox’ (Angelina Jolie), ‘Zowie’ (David Bowie/Angie), and ‘Coco’ (Actress Courtney Cox/actor David Arquette).
– New “Family Active” survey.

MILE HIGH CLUB TO QUICKLY GET LARGER:
Virgin Atlantic has announced the introduction of double beds for passengers traveling in its ‘Upper Class Suite’. The airline has fitted 4 ‘double suites’ onto 2 of its Boeing 747 aircraft, giving passengers traveling together 22-square-feet of space so that they can – quote – ‘enjoy their flight closer together’. The airline plans to eventually introduce ‘double suites’ onto all of its Heathrow Boeing 747 fleet.
– Yahoo! Finance
PHONER: 203.750.2570 (Virgin Atlantic Press Office)

IT AIN’T THE KITTY’S FAULT:
New research reveals that exposure to things like dust and cats does not have any strong influence in causing asthma and other allergies in children. Contrary to previous theories which claimed that the risk of childhood respiratory allergies is linked to how strongly children are exposed to allergens in early life, the UK study finds that children are more likely to suffer from these conditions if their father had an inherited susceptibility to allergy or the child was first-born.
– The medical journal “Thorax”.

AND WE QUOTE:
• “I know it’s hard to believe but I do my own laundry. My washer and dryer aren’t working right now.”
– Superstar Julia Roberts to stunned fellow customers at an LA laundromat.
• “It’s not a hype, not something I thought would be good for publicity. Honest to gosh, it’s true.”
– “Psycho” actress Janet Leigh often-quoted that she was never able to take a shower after shooting the classic horror movie. She died SUNDAY at age 77.

THE BULL SHEET 10.05.2K4

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1922 [82] Bil Keane, Philadelphia PA, comic strip cartoonist (“Family Circus” since 1960)

1943 [61] Steve Miller, Milwaukee WI, classic rock guitarist/singer (“Fly Like an Eagle”, “The Joker”)

1947 [57] Brian Johnson, Newcastle UK, rock singer (AC/DC since 1980-“Moneytalks”, “Thunderstruck”)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (2003)

1958 [46] Bernie Mac, Chicago IL, TV sitcom actor (“Bernie Mac Show” since 2001)/movie actor (“Mr 3000″, “Bad Santa”)  COMING UP: The sequel “Ocean’s Twelve”.

1965 [39] Mario Lemieux, Montréal QC, NHL player/owner (2004 World Cup of Hockey, 2002 Olympic gold, 2 Stanley Cups-Pittsburgh Penguins)

1975 [29] Parminder Nagra, Leicester UK, TV actress (‘Neela Rasgotra’ on “ER” since 2003)/ movie actress (“Bend It Like Beckham”)

1975 [29] Kate Winslet, Reading UK, movie actress (“Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind”, “Titanic”)

1980 [24] Paul Thomas, Waldorf MD, rock bassist (Good Charlotte–“Hold On”, “Girls &  Boys”)   FACTOID: TONIGHT the band is on “Late Night With Conan O’Brien”.

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
PM Paul Martin’s minority Liberal government is cutting pomp and circumstance for TODAY’S “Throne Speech”. For instance, Governor-General Adrienne Clarkson will arrive in a limo instead of the traditional horse-drawn carriage before entering the Senate chamber to deliver the 50-minute speech at 3:30 pm ET, and ‘only’ about 500 dignitaries have been invited to attend.

TODAY is “National Apple Betty Day” (the dessert aka “Apple Brown Betty”, “Apple Crisp”, “Apple Crumble” or “Apple Cobbler”). So here’s a …
BS ‘HARD CORE QUIZ’:
• True or false – apples were a favorite food in ancient Greece? [TRUE]
• About how many lbs of apples do we each eat annually on average – 2, 20, or 200? [19.6 lbs.]
• True or false – apples are a member of the rose family. [TRUE]
• What’s the official name for apple growing – ‘pomology’, ‘coropathy’, or ‘appletemy’? [It's called ‘pomology'.]

TODAY is the 5th annual “National Techies Day”, to heighten the profile of IT careers and show appreciation for technology professionals.
YOU MIGHT BE A TECHIE IF …
• You have all kinds of busted stuff around the house that you refuse to throw away in the hope you can someday fix it.
• You spend time looking at household products trying to devise a method for improvement.
• You actually buy technical books.
• The first thing you do with anything new is take it apart to see how it works.
• You solder tools together to form new objects.
• Apple blossom is the state flower of which US state? [Michigan]
• Which is the top apple-producing state in America? [Washington]

TODAY is “World Teachers Day”, as declared by UNESCO as a significant token of the awareness, understanding and appreciation displayed for the vital contribution that teachers make to education and development. Over 100 countries observe “World Teachers’ Day”.
NET: http://www.ei-ie.org/wtd

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1969 [35] “Monty Python’s Flying Circus” debuts on BBC-TV (45 episodes produced before the troupe leaves in 1974 to make movies)

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1984 [20] 1st Canadian in space (Marc Garneau, aboard shuttle “Challenger”)

1985 [19] 1st AL East title for Toronto Blue Jays

1970 [34] PBS-TV debuts (and the begging begins)

COMING UP . . .
[Wed] Frugal Fun Day
[Wed] Physician Assistant Day
[Wed] Lawyers Day
[Fri] 2nd US Presidential debate (St Louis)
[Fri] National Denim Day
[Sat] 2004 North American Wife Carrying Championship (Bethel ME)
[Sat] World Monopoly Championship (Tokyo)
[Mon] Thanksgiving Day (No “BS” service)
This Week Is . . . No Salt Week (next week is ‘Pound Salt Week’)
This Month Is . . . Gay & Lesbian History Month (read up on the history of Queen George)

BULL’S BITS . . .
BS THINGS YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR ON AN ELEVATOR:

• “Does this look infected to you?”
• “Oops, sorry about my finger. I was aiming for a button.”
• “Hey Uncle Lou, show the lady how you can still push the 4th floor button with both arms full of groceries.”
• “Just ignore Killer. We’re going to have him fixed soon.”
• “As long as we’re all stuck here, how about a sing-along?”
• “Actually I’m not just a Jehovah’s Witness, I also sell life insurance!”
• “Y’know, the acoustics in here are just perfect for yodeling!”
• “Did anyone else eat a burrito for lunch?”
• “The passengers have spoken. It’s time for you to leave.”

TRUTH OR BS?
• During your lifetime, you’ll eat about 60,000 lbs of food. (TRUE, much of it this weekend.)
• A new TV reality show will attempt to find “America’s Sexiest Dog”. (BS, but Spike-TV is likely looking at it.)
• The bowlegs of England’s Queen Anne inspired the famous furniture style. (TRUE)
• In Brazil, large breasts are seen as a low-class libido killer. (TRUE, the reason breast reduction surgery is very popular there.)
• The yo-yo was originally developed as a magic trick. (BS. It was a weapon in the Philippines.)
• The University of Calgary offers a 2-day course in ‘Igloo Building’. (TRUE, through the university’s ‘Arctic Institute of North America’.)
 
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:

Today’s Question: When it comes to shopping for THIS, most women love to … but most men say it’s their least favorite thing to shop for.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Furniture.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
It’s a dog eat dog world, and there are some real bitches out there.


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