Friday, October 24, 2003        Edition: #2651
There’s a Difference Between Sheet and Crapola!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TODAY Pamela Anderson’s “Club Pam” radio show debuts on Sirius satellite, supposedly live from her bedroom – topless (what do ya give it – 2 weeks?) . . . TOMORROW the “Reality Revue” opens at Las Vegas nightclub Chez Moi, which features reality TV contestants hoofing onstage, including “Survivor’s” Jerri Manthey & “Joe Millionaire” runner-up Sarah Kozer (answering the question, what could possibly be lamer than a TV reality show?) . . . Production on Robert De Niro’s latest film “Hide & Seek” has been postponed indefinitely while he gets treatment for prostate cancer . . . It’s a miracle! Jim Caviezel, the actor who plays ‘Jesus’ in Mel Gibson’s movie “The Passion of Christ”, has reportedly escaped injury after being struck by lightning during filming in Italy – even though a producer claims he saw sparks coming out of his ears . . . “Chicken of the Sea” is hoping to sign up Jessica Simpson as company spokesperson after she recently grabbed headlines for confusing their tuna for chicken on her hit reality show “Newlyweds” (Jessica’s not sure she can handle it – she says she doesn’t know much about spokes) . . . “Beyond Borders” actress Angelina Jolie now has a total of 24 tattoos, the latest being 5 vertical lines of ancient Cambodian script on her shoulder, supposedly to ward off bad luck . . . Aussie pop star Kylie Minogue has invested much of her estimated $48-million fortune in real estate, and now has 20 houses around the world, including high-end properties in Paris & London . . . And one-half of the remaining Bee Gees, 53-year-old Robin Gibb, has made a bald revelation at the World Peace press conference in Hamburg, Germany – by showing up sans toupee.

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Scary Movie 3” (Comedy): This 3rd spoof of the horror movie genre includes send-ups of “The Ring”, “The Matrix”, “Signs” (with Charlie Sheen in the Mel Gibson role) and even the Eminem movie “Eight Mile”. Along the way, a slew of pseudo-stars pop up, including Pamela Anderson, Jenny McCarthy, Denise Richards, Leslie Nielsen, Queen Latifah, Simon Cowell, Ja Rule, George Carlin, Macy Gray, Camryn Manheim & Peter Boyle. And if you’re wondering, yup, “Scary Movie 4″ is on the way.
• “Beyond Borders” (Drama): Angelina Jolie plays a pampered socialite who leaves her deluxe London life to help out in war-torn countries such as Ethiopia. Clive Owen co-stars as the renegade American disaster relief doctor she falls in love with. Art imitating life?
• “Radio” (Drama): Ed Harris & Cuba Gooding Jr star in this story of the 40-year relationship between a small town high school football coach and the illiterate, mentally-challenged man nicknamed ‘Radio’ whom he mentors. Based on a true story published in “Sports Illustrated”.
• “In the Cut” (Psychological Thriller opens wider): Meg Ryan plays a lonely NYC professor who discovers the darker side of passion after becoming involved with a tough homicide detective who’s investigating a series of murders in her neighborhood. Mark Ruffalo, Kevin Bacon & Jennifer Jason Leigh co-star.

SMOKIN’ JOE MEMENTOES:
TODAY former heavyweight champ Joe Frazier is auctioning off some high-priced boxing memorabilia, including his contract from the famed ‘Thrilla in Manila’ bout with Muhammad Ali ( expected to fetch upwards of $40,000), and his championship belt valued circa $80,000. Proceeds go to his Golden Gloves organization for inner-city kids.

WHAT TO WEAR?
Halloween is 1 week from TODAY. Here’s what’s hot in prepackaged costumes for 2003 (but homemade ones are better, right?).
BOYS: ‘Spiderman’, ‘Hulk’ (hottest new costume), ‘Harry Potter’, Pirate King, ‘Darth Vader’.
GIRLS: ‘Barbie’ Cheerleader, Mega Star (a la Britney), Pop Diva, Hagatha the Witch, Jeannie (harem girl).
ADULTS: ‘Elvis Presley’, ‘Austin Powers’, ‘Gandolf’ (“Lord of the Rings”), ‘Fat Bastard’, ‘Cher’, “SNL” cheerleaders.
Source: ExtremeHalloween.com

HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT MIKE?
Clubbers in cities across Germany are screaming, moaning and panting over the latest nightlife craze – ‘porno karaoke’. It’s similar to traditional karaoke but instead of standing in for Shania Twain or John Mayer, participants belt out the soundtracks of adult movie stars. Players pair off in male-female teams as an XXX movie is loaded up. With the sound turned off, each duo is given microphones and has 1 minute to create the sounds for the onscreen action. The nightclub crowd picks the winners based on the most ecstatic fake orgasm. (On-air contest?)

LOCK THE MEDICINE CABINET!
Kids have found a new and dangerous way to get high – cold medicine. At less than $10 a box, it’s a cheap, easy way to get high and a lot of teens know about it. Taking overdoses of Coricidin HBP is called ‘skittling’ because the popular over-the-counter medication looks like ‘Skittles’ candy. The active ingredient in Coricidin is the cough suppressant dextro-methor-phan, which can cause hallucinations. However, abuse of the drug can cause coma, seizure, and cessation of breathing … in other words, death. (And you thought accidentally gluing your nostril shut was dangerous.)

FOR THE RECORD:
93-year-old Peter Vita of Port Chester NY has received notification that he will be entered in the “Guinness Book of World Records” for his 81-year record of – continuous barbering. His first customer when he was 12 was his own grandfather. He’s still at it but – thankfully – no longer uses a straight razor. (Wow, a 93-year-old barber! Is that where you went, [co-host]?)

BS AMAZING FACTS:
• 77% of movies illegally downloaded off the Web come from insiders in the movie industry.
• 41 is the ‘ideal age’, according to a new Harris Poll of people of all ages.
• According to the new revised “Times Atlas of the World”, there will be 16 ‘megacities’ worldwide by 2005, the largest being Tokyo with an estimated 27 million people.
• According to Coldwell Banker, La Jolla CA now has America’s most expensive real estate. The average home is worth – $1.3 million!

THE BULL SHEET 10.24.03

TODAY’S CELEBRITY BIRTHDAYS . . .
1936 [67] Bill Wyman (William George Perks), Lewishman UK, retired rock bassist who left the Rolling Stones in 1992 and is now a restaurant owner (‘Sticky Fingers’ burger chain)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1989)

1947 [56] Kevin Kline, St Louis MO, movie actor (“Life as a House”, Academy Award-“A Fish Called Wanda”)

1980 [23] Monica (Arnold), College Park GA, pop singer (“Angel of Mine”, w/Brandy-“The Boy Is Mine”)

SATURDAY’S BIRTHDAYS . . .
1962 [41] Chad Smith, St Paul MN, rock drummer (Red Hot Chili Peppers-“Can’t Stop“, “Californication”)  FACTOID: Entered in “Guinness Book of World Records” for playing ‘world’s largest drum kit’ – 308 pieces.

1970 [33] Ed Robertson, Scarborough ON, pop singer/guitarist (Barenaked Ladies-“Another Postcard”, “Pinch Me”)

1970 [33] Chely Wright, Kansas City MO, country singer (“Single White Female”, “Shut Up and Drive”)

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
TODAY is “National Bologna Day”, a good day to fry up a slice to add to your peanut butter sandwich. Yum!

TODAY is “United Nations Day”, honoring the anniversary of the day in 1945 that the majority of the world’s countries adopted the charter that formed the UN.

TOMORROW is the 2nd annual “International Rock Paper Scissors Championship” in Toronto with over 1,000 ‘RPS’ experts expected to compete for a $7,500 grand prize using a variety of techniques. Reigning champ Peter Lovering of Toronto, for instance, keeps a cowboy hat over his eyes so he can’t see opponents’ faces. Rock Paper Scissors likely originated as a schoolyard method of making decisions, such as choosing teams.
PHONER: 416.578.4335 (Graham Walker)
NET: www.worldrps.com

SUNDAY at 2am, clocks officially go back to “Standard Time” (‘Spring forward, Fall back’. Hey, it’s a long weekend!). Daylight Saving Time was instituted during WWI to conserve fuel. It has nothing to do with farmers as is commonly believed. Experts say about 20% of us notice significant changes in mood as seasons change, accentuated by the switch from Daylight Saving Time. What used to be called ‘winter blues’ is now ‘Seasonal Affective Disorder’ or ‘SAD’. (Drivers: Don’t forget to adjust your hands to the 9 and 1 o’clock positions on your steering wheel until Spring.)

SUNDAY is “Mother-in-Laws Day”, honoring their ‘contribution to family life and good humor in enduring humiliating bad jokes’. Remember, behind every successful man there’s a surprised mother-in-law.

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1901 [102] 1st person to go over Niagara Falls in a barrel – and live – as 43-year-old Annie Edson Taylor of Bay City MI expects fame and fortune, but later dies in poverty (the same fate may be in store for 40-year-old drifter Kirk Jones of Canton MI who THIS WEEK became the 1st to go over the 180-ft falls and survive with no flotation device or special equipment)

1992 [11] 1st Canadian team to win baseball’s World Series (Toronto Blue Jays defeat Atlanta Braves 4-3 in Game 6)

1836 [167] 1st ‘friction safety match’ patented (Alonzo Dwight Phillips-Springfield MA)

1857 [146] World’s 1st ‘football club’ (soccer) founded (Sheffield Football Club-England)

1939 [64] 1st ‘nylon stockings’ go on sale, developed by DuPont (ok, but who’s to blame for pantyhose?)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1921 [82] Lunenburg NS fishing schooner “Bluenose” defeats US vessel “Elsie” to win International Schooner Championship (the reason it’s on the Canadian dime)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Sat] International Denim Day
[Sat] Make a Difference Day
[Sat] Cartoonists Against Crime Day
[Sat] International Greasy Foods Day
[Sat] Punk For A Day Day
[Mon] Ramadan begins
[Mon] Cranky Co-Workers Day
This Week Is – Consumers Week / Disarmament Week
This Month Is – National Pharmacy Month / Do-it Yourself Month

BULL’S BITS . . .
Here’s a good argument starter …
ALL-TIME HOTTEST ROCK & ROLL COUPLES:
(based on the buzz created not appearance)
10. Chris Martin & Gwyneth Paltrow
9. Justin Timberlake & Britney Spears
8. Axl Rose & Stephanie Seymour
7. George Jones & Tammy Wynette
6. Bobby Brown & Whitney Houston
5. John Lennon & Yoko Ono
4. Sean Penn & Madonna
3. P Diddy & Jennifer Lopez
2. Tommy Lee & Pamela Anderson
1. Kurt Cobain & Courtney Love
Source: “Maxim Blender” magazine poll.

Here’s another one …
ALL-TIME SCARIEST HORROR FILMS:
(just in time for Halloween)
10. “Night of the Living Dead”
9. “Alien”
8. “Nightmare on Elm Street”
7. “Phantasm”
6. “Carrie”
5. “The Exorcist”
4. “Sixth Sense”
3. “The Others”
2. “Blair Witch Project”
1. “The Ring”
Source: “Pacific Daily News”

BS WORLD SERIES QUIZ:
Q: Only one Baseball Hall of Fame pitcher finished his career during a World Series. Who?
A: LA Dodger Sandy Koufax in 1966. Roger Clemens will become the 2nd when he’s elected to the Hall, a foregone conclusion.

Q: Of the existing Major League Baseball teams, 6 have NEVER made it to a World Series. Name them.
A: Colorado Rockies, Houston Astros, Montreal Expos, Seattle Mariners, Tampa Bay Devil Rays and Texas Rangers.
Source: “Sports Illustrated for Kids”

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: According to a women’s magazine, THIS is the #1 signal that he’s a ‘stud-muffin’ in the sack.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: He notices goosebumps.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.


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