Thursday, October 2, 2008        Edition: #3870
We’ve Got Our Sheet Together!

Norway’s Consumer Ombudsman is taking Apple to court over what it calls unfair barriers to playing music from the iTunes music store on devices other than Apple’s iPod, and the group is encouraging other countries to follow . . . Independent record labels are warning there’ll be an exodus of music artists from MySpace because its new ‘MySpace Music’ service allegedly ignores indie acts in favor of a deal with major music labels (join the crowd – everyone else seems to be moving to Facebook) . . . National Federation of the Blind (NFB) has announced it plans to protest the new movie “Blindness” at 75 cinemas across America when it opens TOMORROW because it ‘portrays blind people as monsters’ (the film is based on a novel by Nobel Prize winner Jose Saramago) . . . “Superman” fans have helped save the place where the action hero was created in 1932 by writer Jerry Siegel & Canadian artist Joe Shuster by raising $100,000 in an online auction to repair the dilapidated house in Cleveland OH (among the items auctioned: a walk-on role on the TV show “Heroes”) . . . As if subjecting us to “Paris Hilton’s My New BFF” (MTV) wasn’t bad enough, now Hilton’s released a new song ‘inspired by the show’ titled – wait for it – “My BFF” (if it’s for the benefit of others, can it still be called ‘mercy killing’?) . . . Most likely to replace “ER” (NBC) after its FEBRUARY series finalé is the new ensemble cop drama, “LAPD”, starring former “OC” actor Benjamin McKenzie (‘Constable Ryan Atwood’?) . . . And it looks like the argument over “Project Runway” moving from Bravo to Lifetime may end with an unexpected outcome – it may land on the main NBC-TV network instead of a cable channel, proving both a goldmine for the net and producer the Weinstein Company (and we’re betting Heidi Klum might also give the idea her Seal of Approval).

• “Billy: The Early Years” – Country stars Sara Evans & Josh Turner are among those who’ll attend the world premiere of the Billy Graham bio-pic in Nashville. Evans sings on the soundtrack (“Low”); Turner has a small role in the film.
• Debate Night – Which will you watch at 9 pm? “Federal Election Debate”, the lone televised English-language face-off for PM candidates (CBC/CTV/Global) or the US “Vice Presidential Debate” as Senator Joe Biden takes on Alaska Governor Sarah Palin at Washington University in St Louis (ABC/CBSFOX/NBC/PBS)? (Odds are most TV viewers be more interested in where the heck “Grey’s Anatomy” went.)
• “International Bluegrass Music Awards” – Del McCoury hosts the 19th annual salute to bluegrass at the Ryman Auditorium in Nashville. Blue Highway, Ricky Skaggs & Kentucky Thunder, and the Dan Tyminski Band are each nominated for 6 awards.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Jennifer Hudson (“Spotlight”) performs.
• Sugarland – TONIGHT’s “Love On the Inside“ tour date in Ames, Iowa has been cancelled, bringing to 3 the postponements necessary due to Jennifer Nettles’ throat problems.

• AC/DC – In a new deal with “Rock Band” game-maker Harmonix, 18 live tracks from classic live performances will become available in a standalone game, “AC/DC Live: Rock Band Track Pack“, to be released in NOVEMBER.
• Nine Inch Nails – They’re collaborating on a new version of the popular iPhone music game “TapTap Revenge”. The special edition will feature 16 tracks from the recent albums “The Slip” and “Ghosts I-IV”, some of which were edited or remixed specifically for the game.
• Velvet Revolver – Guitarist Slash has 14 tracks written for his upcoming solo album. A slew of singers have been enlisted to collaborate but there’s no word on whom. Meantime, Slash’s reaction to a new “MusicRadar” fan poll suggesting Axl Rose should be the new frontman for Velvet Revolver: “Yeah right.”

The ‘Human Airbag’ has been invented in Japan to protect the elderly from being injured in falls. The gizmo involves a 2.5-lb (1.1-kg) pouch which is fitted around the waist. Internal sensors detect movement and are programmed to know when the wearer slips, stumbles, or falls down stairs. Within a 10th-of-a-second, the airbags inflate to the size of 3 footballs as they’re blasted with 15 liters of compressed gas, offering a soft slab of padding on the most vulnerable parts of the body. The bottom line for guilt-ridden children who don’t have time or space for their parents … about $1,300. (A lot of folks have natural ‘pouches’ the size of 3 footballs.)
– “Times of London”

If you’ve got an idea that might change the world but you don’t have any cash to implement it check out Google’s new ‘Project 10 to the 100′, which is offering $10 million for the best ideas that will ‘change the world by helping as many people as possible’. Categories include ‘community’, ‘education’, ‘energy’, ‘environment’, ‘health’, ‘shelter’, and ‘everything else’. Simply submit your big idea online before OCTOBER 20th. (If you come up with a cancer cure OCTOBER 21st, it doesn’t count … sorry.)

• In Ohio, a Middletown court has sentenced a 32-year-old woman to a month in jail after she admitted to chasing children and blocking traffic while … dressed as a cow. The sentence is a result of the apparently inebriated woman’s refusal to go home and remain there, as instructed by a police officer. (As you know, that’s udder disrespect of the law!)
– “Cincinnati Enquirer“
• In Italy, 54-year-old twins from Milan have both been charged with fraud. One is a lawyer who was recently called to fill in as a substitute judge. When the trial date conflicted with another case she was working, she sent her identical twin sister – who has no legal training – to stand in for her as defence attorney, all the while charging the clients her regular fee. Both will stand trial in JANUARY. (Likely side-by-side.)
– Reuters
• In Romania, a judge arrested for corruption had no recollection of his cell-mate when he first met him in Arad jail but the con certainly remembered him … he’s a convicted armed robber the judge sent to prison. His honor says he now fears for his life and is demanding to be moved to a one-person cell. (Somehow in all of this, it seems like justice is served.)
– Ananova News Service
• In Florida, an 18-year-old Stuart teen has filed a report with the Martin County Sheriff’s Office claiming he was accosted while riding his bicycle to work SATURDAY morning and robbed of $100. The lad claims a gang of blond women wearing overalls with no shirts or bras surrounded him and removed the cash from his back pocket. (Deputies say the kid should be happy to pay a hundred bucks to live out this fantasy.)

Experts say there are a lot of ways to save money around the house that don’t cost a penny to implement and aren’t that difficult. For instance …
• Turn your heat 1-to-3 degrees. If you’re uncomfortable with the cooler temp, put on a sweater.
• Turn down the thermostat on your water heater from the default setting of 140 F (60 C) to 115 (46 C). You won’t feel the difference … except on your utility bill.
• Turn off your dishwasher’s heated dry cycle. Let your dishes air-dry.
• Don’t preheat your oven.
• Use the appropriate-sized appliance for each task, ie: a toaster or toaster oven rather than the broiler for bagels.
• Unplug appliances when not in use, including the cords that charge your cellphone or razor.
• Shut the curtains at night and reopen them on the sunny side of the house during the day to let sunlight heat the house naturally.
– “San Francisco Chronicle”

You can use cricket chirps to calculate the temperature (in Celsius). Count the number of chirps in 25 seconds. Divide by 3. Add 4.

An organization called the ‘Seasteading Institute’ is planning to build 10,000-sq-ft floating platforms on which pioneers can launch their own autonomous countries on the high seas, much like the homesteaders of yesteryear. It’s thought these so-called ‘Seasteads’ will be powered by windmills and may either operate independently or dock together and float in groups. It’s also suggested that catapults could be used to sling goods from one to another. In case you think these folks have been smoking wacky weed, they’re already planning to have a prototype sailing off the coast of San Francisco CA by NEXT YEAR. (What they seem to be ignoring: who’d wanna live on a 100-by-100 ft raft in the middle of the ocean?)
– “American Scholar Magazine“

• There are more than 640 muscles in the human body. ([Co-host] has 54 in his head alone.)
• Obsessive nose picking is referred to as ‘rhinotillexomania’. (Also ‘goldmining’.)
• The human heart creates enough pressure to squirt blood 30 ft. (As seen in the “CSI” episode entitled “Plasma Fountain”.)
• Ancient Egyptians used the spice thyme to help preserve mummies. (And beer to preserve daddies.)

1948 [60] Donna Karan (Faske), Forest Hills NY, fashion designer (DKNY line of clothing)

1951 [57] Sting (Gordon Sumner), Newcastle Upon Tyne UK, rock musician (“Brand New Day”, Police-“Every Breath You Take”)/founder of the ‘Rainforest Foundation’ (1989)

1954 [54] Lorraine Bracco, Brooklyn NY, TV actress (‘Dr Jennifer Melfi’, the shrink on “The Sopranos” 1999-2007)/ex-Mrs Edward James Olmos, ex-Mrs Harvey Keitel

1970 [38] Kelly Ripa, Stratford NJ, TV talk show co-host (“Live With Regis & Kelly” since 2001)/TV actress (“Hope & Faith” 2003-06, “All My Children” 1990-2002)

• “Custodial Workers Day”, honoring those who clean up after the rest of us. Nicer names for ‘Janitor’ include: ‘Caretaker’, ‘Maintenance Coordinator’, ‘Sanitation Engineer’, ‘Cleanliness Resource Supervisor’.

• “Name Your Car Day”. Polls show that about 15% of people have a pet name for their vehicle. What’s the best-named car model? Diablo? Lamborghini? Cayenne? Hummer?

• “Okanagan Wine Festival” through OCTOBER 12th, the annual Autumn celebration of fabulous wine and great food with over 150 events throughout BC’s Okanagan Valley.

• “Old Man’s Day” in Braughing, England, commemorating a 16th-century funeral in which pallbearers dropped a coffin bearing an old man. The jolt woke him up and saved him from being buried alive. Villagers have commemorated the event ever since with a procession to the cemetery.

• “World Farm Animal Day”, as declared by the ‘Farm Animal Reform Movement’, to memorialize the ‘needless suffering and death’ of billions of innocent farm animals each year. The date honors the birthday of Mahatma Gandhi, who was the world’s foremost champion of humane farming.

1950 [58] Charles Schultz’s comic strip “Peanuts” (originally titled “Li’l Folks”) debuts in 9 newspapers, introducing the characters ‘Charlie Brown’, ‘Snoopy’, ‘Patty’ & ‘Sherman’ (even though Schultz is dead, “Peanuts Classics” are still published in over 2000 newspapers)

1995 [13] OJ Simpson jurors reach ‘not guilty’ verdict in his double murder case in less than 4 hours

1995 [13] Alanis Morissette’s “Jagged Little Pill” reaches #1 on album charts

1961 [47] 1st ‘Pre-Moistened Hand Towel’ is introduced (what did moms do before ‘wipes’?)

1991 [17] 1st team in sports history to draw 4 million fans in a single season (Toronto Blue Jays, who also clinch AL East on this day)

1994 [14] 1st-ever NFL coach clash of father vs son as Miami Dolphins’ Don Shula defeats son and Cincinnati Bengal coach David by a score of 23-7

1997 [11] ‘World’s Shortest Man’, 22-inch-tall Gul Mohammed, dies at age 36 in New Delhi, India without achieving his dream of marrying a tall woman (like maybe a strapping 3-footer)

[Fri] “The Ex-List” series debut (CBS)
[Fri] 14th National Denim Day
[Sat] NHL season begins (Prague CZ/Stockholm SE)
[Sun] “Rock Band Live” tour kicks off (San Diego)
[Sun] “Miley’s Sweet 16 – Share the Celebration” (Disneyland)
[Sun] Techies Day
[Sun] World Teachers Day
[Mon] “Corner Gas” final season debut (CTV)
[Mon] Physician Assistant Day
[Mon] Lawyers Day
This Week Is … Remember to Register to Vote Week
This Month Is … Dryer Vent Safety Month (OMG, something else to worry about!)

• On average, 1-in-5 of your calls ends in some sort of combustion.
• It’s got so much duct tape on it, it won’t fit in your pocket anymore.
• It requires 6 batteries for power …  D-cell.
• Your current model is on display in the ‘Museum of Electronic Antiquities’.
• People in theaters keep complaining about the rotary dial clicking noise.
• Texting feature requires you to know Morse Code.
• The volume adjustment consists of opening and closing louvers over the ear-horn.
• When you clip it to your belt, you can only walk in circles.
• The ’80s called and couldn’t stop laughing.

The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before your boss does.

• You gamble – poorly – but want to do better.
• You want to lose weight.
• Approval of you for anything is always guaranteed.
• Your perfect match is waiting for you somewhere in your hometown.
• You want to start a home business and start making REAL money.
• Amazing secrets are hidden by nothing more than your mouse click.
• You’re holding between 25 and 30 lbs of fat in your intestines.
• For most things in life, only your confirmation is needed.
• For you, there is always another ‘last chance’.
– Thanks to Spencer Green.

Q: Put these animals in order from the one which sleeps longest each day to the one which sleeps least each day … Chimpanzee, Giraffe, Tiger.
A: Tiger (15.8 hrs); Chimpanzee (9.7 hrs); Giraffe (1.9 hrs).

Who’s the sexiest newscaster (sportscaster) on TV? (CTV Newsnet’s Marcia McMillan? CBC’s Ian Hanamansing? TSN’s Sara Orlesky? Mike Duffy?) (CNN’s Erica Hill? CNN’s Anderson Cooper? CBS-TV’s Katie Couric? Wolf Blitzer?)

Today’s Question: A recent survey picks ‘liver’ as the worst tasting food; THIS came is second.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Lima beans.

Don’t let the fact that you can’t do all you want to do keep you from doing what you can do.

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