Tuesday, October 21, 2008        Edition: #3883
Bullseye!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Hollywood fashion critic Mr Blackwell (Richard Seltzer) has died at age 86; the former actor & designer who introduced the concept of an annual ‘Worst Dressed List’ way back in 1960 (now Britney can relax) . . . As part of his sentence for drug & battery charges (which resulted after he pulled a teen girl’s top down), celebretard Andy Dick is going to have to wear one of those ankle bracelets for a year that will automatically notify authorities if he’s drinking . . . . Actor Colin Farrell has gone through what he calls a ‘massive life change’ now that he’s clean & sober after being drunk and/or high for 15 years and he admits it’s now tough to see the world in ‘stark focus’ (BS translation: Life sucks without beer goggles) . . . Actress Nicole Kidman say she learned to love the ranch lifestyle so much while shooting the movie epic “Australia”, she’s bought herself a spread outside of Sydney with a herd of 40 cattle which are basically on the property – to keep the grass short . . . 48-year-old David Duchovny’s 28-year-old female tennis coach Edit Pakay has sparked rumors she’s the real cause of his split from wife Tea Leoni after refusing to deny she’s been having an affair with the actor (is it a ‘love match’?) . . . And thanks to the Tina Fey-Sarah Palin pairing, “Saturday Night Live” (NBC/Global) pulled 17 million viewers in its 1st half-hour on the weekend, its highest rating in 14 years (back when figure skater Nancy Kerrigan appeared after her infamous knee-whacking), but interestingly new stats show that only a third of those who’ve seen any of the Fey-as-Palin skits have watched on live TV; the rest checked it out online or watched it later via DVR (welcome to life in the digital era!).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/A Channel) – R&B singer Robin Thicke (“Magic”) is on.
• “Eminem: The Way I Am” – Eminem’s ‘first set of memoirs’ hits bookstores. As well as insight into his life, it will include unseen photos and ‘lyric sketches’. (BS translation: Doodles.)
• The Who – The classic rockers perform at The Palace of Auburn Hills in Michigan, with proceeds being given to Detroit charities Gleaners Community Food Bank and Focus: HOPE.
• Brooke Hogan – She tells “Life & Style” magazine she’s planning a reunion with her estranged parents Hulk Hogan and his ex- Linda to mark her brother Nick’s release from a Clearwater FL jail TODAY. The 18-year-old has been serving an 8-month sentence for felony reckless driving. (We’re guessing this is all being staged for her lame VH1 reality show “Brooke Knows Best”.)
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live“ (ABC/CityTV) – Singer/songwriter Jesse McCartney is on.
• “Late Night With Conan O’Brien” (NBC/A Channel) – Atmosphere performs “You” from the album “When Life Gives You Lemons, You Paint That Sh-t Gold”.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Big & Rich – Word has it John Rich got into a bout of fisticuffs with Jerry Montano, former bassist for rock band Danzig, in the wee hours at a West Hollywood hotel. First cops and then paramedics responded to the scene and one of the combatants was treated for a bloody nose. No charges have been laid … so far.
• Madonna – Publicist Liz Rosenberg says a divorce settlement has yet to be finalized, in spite of media reports suggesting a deal had been struck on how she’ll split property with her hubby and on a custody agreement for their children.
• Miranda Lambert – The “More Like Her” country singer just bought a horse named ‘Playboy’ and has been learning to ride nearly every day since. She says she hopes to get good enough for barrel racing. You’d think a girl from Longview TX would have grown up on horseback!
• Oasis – The UK rockers are providing 3 tracks from the new album “Dig Out Your Soul” as downloadable content for “Guitar Hero World Tour” on both Xbox 360 and Playstation 3.
• Pink – She’s revealed she checked into Arizona’s Canyon Ranch rehab facility in the summer, fearing she was an alcoholic. After consultations with a therapist and reading the AA manual she says she’s realized she’s not an alky … just someone who likes to get drunk. Well then.
• U2 – Reports say they’ll receive an estimated $19-million-worth of Live Nation shares as part of the 12-year deal they signed earlier THIS YEAR. LA-based Live Nation has registered 1.56 million shares to U2 in a filing with the Securities & Exchange Commission.

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “The Incredible Hulk” ( Action Adventure ): Edward Norton stars as geneticist ‘Bruce Banner’ who’s attempting to cure a strange condition that turns him into a monster. Complicating his situation is a military initiative that wants him captured and controlled. Liv Tyler & Tim Roth co-star. Sticks closer to the character’s Marvel Comics original than Ang Lee’s 2003 film, “Hulk”. Shot in Toronto, with scenes in Belleville, Dundas, and Trenton ON. Also comes in a ‘3-Disc Special Edition’.
• Also released TODAY: “Ben 10 Alien Force: Season 1“ (Animation); “Casino Royale – 40th Anniversary Edition”; “Family Guy: Volume 6” (TV); “Knight Rider: The Complete Series”(Classic TV); “Looney Tunes Golden Collection: Volume 6”; and “The Man From UNCLE: The Complete Series” (Classic TV).

HOW GUYS SHOULD DANCE:
UK researchers at the University of Hertfordshire have examined men’s freestyle dancing styles in nightclubs to determine which are most likely to impress female onlookers. Psychologist & former professional dancer Peter Lovatt showed women short video clips of men dancing, then asked them to rate them as to which seemed ‘most masculine’, ‘most dominant’, and ‘most attractive’. Timid shuffling from foot-to-foot in small movements rated lowest overall; large uncoordinated moves, though thought unattractive, were thought to be ‘most dominant’; and highly co-ordinated medium-sized and complex moves were ranked ‘most attractive’. (Unfortunately for [co-host] there’s no category for ‘most hilarious’.)
– “Telegraph”

BOOGER THERAPY:
Austrian doctor Friedrich Bischinger claims that people who pick their nose and eat it are healthier, happier, and more in tune with their bodies. He claims that the nose is a natural filter of various bacteria, which is true enough, but goes on to suggest that eating a mass of gunk will stimulate the intestines like a powerful medicine which strengthens the immune system. Bischinger says that, while modern medicine is constantly trying to do the same thing through far more complicated methods, people who pick their nose and eat it get a natural boost to their immune system for free. (We say snot true.)
– DamnInteresting.com

NEW & IMPROVED MOM!
Motherhood can supercharge the female brain, leading to lifelong improvements in mental skills and giving protection against the degenerative diseases of old age, according to new University of Richmond research. The findings challenge the popular belief that having a child harms mental acuity. While there may be a decline in powers during pregnancy (so-called ‘baby brain’), scientists now say it’s more than offset by improved abilities after the baby’s born. It’s believed the increased mental powers help equip women for the greater demands of life with a child. (Maybe that’s when they acquire the BS detector for lame excuses?)
– “Times of London”

PAMPERED BOXER:
Ukrainian prizefighter Vitali Klitschko has reveled a secret weapon that he’s used during his successful quest for the WBC heavyweight title … his baby boy’s wet diapers! 37-year-old Klitschko says he wraps his fists in used diapers from his 3-year-old son Max in order to help them recover. Quote: “Baby wee is good because it’s pure, doesn’t contain toxins, and doesn’t smell.” (Um, 2 problems here: What’s this kid been drinking that killed the smell? And why the heck is a 3-year-old still wearing diapers?).
– Ananova News

FOR THE RECORD:
Reigning hot dog-eating champion Joey Chestnut has gone on to even greater renown by setting a new world record for gobbling down slices of pizza. Joey downed 45 slices of pizza in 10 minutes at the Famous Famiglia pizza-eating contest in NYC’s Times Square. During his $5,000 prize-winning performance, he consumed about 11,700 calories and 450 grams of fat. (But fewer cow eyelids and pig snouts than when he specialized in hot dogs.)
– “NY Daily News”

DID YOU KNOW?
• This Halloween, over 4.3 million kids in America are expected to go trick-or-treating as princesses.
– National Retail Federation
• The average lead pencil will draw a line 35 miles long or write roughly 45,000 English words. (Or about 32 German words.)
– “Discover Magazine”

BS CHRONOMETER 10.21.08
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1942 [66] Judy Sheindlin, Brooklyn NY, TV judge (“Judge Judy” since 1996)

1949 [59] Mike Keenan, Bowmanville ON, NHL head coach (Calgary Flames since 2007)

1956 [52] Carrie Fisher, Beverly Hills CA, movie actress (‘Princess Leia’ in original “Star Wars” trilogy)/author (“Postcards from the Edge”)/screenwriter (“The Wedding Singer”)

1979 [29] Gabe Gross, Baltimore MD, MLB outfielder (Tampa Bay Rays)

1980 [28] Kim Kardashian, Los Angeles CA, socialite/apparel retailer/TV personality (“Dancing With the Stars” 2008, “Keeping Up With the Kardashians” since 2007)/GF of NFL player Reggie Bush (New Orleans Saints)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Babbling Day”, a day of tolerance for those who run off at the mouth … unless they’re on-the-air. Radio rule #1: ‘Tis better to be brief than boring.

• “Overseas Chinese Day”, when thousands of Chinese go back to their homeland of Taiwan for special celebrations.

• “Reptile Day”, a day of cold-blooded appreciation.

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1972 [36] Chuck Berry scores his 1st (& only) #1 hit, the sing-along novelty song “My Ding-a-Ling”

1997 [11] Elton John’s tribute to Princess Diana, “Candle in the Wind 1997″, is declared the ‘Largest-Selling Single Record’ of all-time by the “Guinness Book of Records” after it surpasses Bing Crosby’s “White Christmas” by selling 31.8 million copies

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1849 [159] 1st ‘Tattooed Man’, James O’Connell, is put on exhibition at NYC’s Franklin Theater

1879 [129] 1st practical ‘Electric Light Bulb’ demonstrated by Thomas Edison (before that, what appeared over peoples’ heads when they had an idea?)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1918 [90] Margaret Owen of NYC sets ‘Typing Speed Record’ of 170 wpm … on a manual typewriter, with no errors!

COMING UP . . .
[Wed] international caps lock day
[Thurs] “Godspell” opens on Broadway
[Thurs] BET Hip Hop Awards air (BET)
[Thurs] Canned Food Day
[Thurs] TV Talk Show Host Day
This Week Is … YMCA Teen Week
This Month Is … International Doll Collectors Month

BULL’S BITS
MORE BS HANDY TIPS TO MAKE LIFE EASIER:
• Take your bananas apart when you get home from the store. If you leave them connected at the stem, they ripen faster.
• To warm biscuits, pancakes, or muffins that were refrigerated, place them in the microwave with a cup of water. The increased moisture will keep the food moist and help it reheat faster.
• To get something out of a heat register or from under the fridge, stick an empty paper towel roll or empty gift-wrap roll into your vacuum hose. It can be bent or flattened to get into narrow openings.
• Pin a small safety pin to the seam of your slip and you will not have a clingy skirt or dress. Same thing works with slacks that cling when wearing pantyhose. Place pin in seam of slacks and – ta-da! – static is gone.
• If you seal an envelope and then realize you forgot to include something inside , just place your sealed envelope in the freezer for an hour or 2. Voila! It unseals easily. (Also good for snooping in your sig’s mail.)
– Answerology.com

BS PHONE STARTER:
Is it ticking you off to see holiday season displays already in stores?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: THIS is now the #1 reason we go to the doctor. It’s up 30% in a decade.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Depression and other mental health issues.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Silence cannot be misquoted.


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