Tuesday, October 6, 2009        Edition: #4115
You’re Up to Your Eyeballs in Sheet!


Celeb couple Justin Timberlake & Jessica Biel are said to be ‘re-evaluating’ their relationship after dating for around 2-and-a-half years (BS translation: We expected this match-up to further our careers more than it has) . . . A paparazzo has filed a battery complaint against 49-year-old actor Sean Penn (“Milk”) whom he claims kicked him in the legs then punched him in the arm and in the camera (Penn previously served jail time in 1987 for hitting a movie extra who tried to take a picture of him) . . . Movie actor Antonio Banderas must demolish part of his beachfront Spanish villa in Marbella after losing a court battle to retain what’s actually communal beach land for himself (hurrah, sunbathers rule!) . . . The 1994 movie “Backbeat”, the story of the early days of The Beatles gigging in Hamburg, Germany is being adapted as a stage play, debuting in Glasgow, Scotland early next year . . . 54-year-old “Sex & The City” actor Chris Noth (‘Mr Big’) has confirmed he is set to wed his longtime girlfriend Tara Wilson, just weeks after denying there were any such plans (then she ‘had a talk’ with him) . . . And Jermaine Jackson is lambasting critics who accuse him of ‘cashing in’ on his brother Michael’s death, insisting he just wants to ‘keep the King of Pop’s legacy alive’ (good thinking, cuz there hasn’t been much media coverage).


• “Colbert Report” (Comedy Central/CTV) – The Mountain Goats (“Life Of the World to Come”).
• “Dancing With the Stars” (ABC/CTV) – One celebrity is eliminated.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/A Channel) – Miranda Lambert (“Revolution”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Gossip (“Music For Men”).
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – The Avett Brothers (“Emotionalism”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – They Might Be Giants (“ Here Comes Science”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – KISS (“Sonic Boom”).
• “Tonight Show With Conan O’Brien” (NBC/A Channel): Anvil (“Anvil! The Story of Anvil”).


• Backstreet Boys – Today they release their 7th studio album, “This Is Us”. They’re spending the rest of 2009 and all of 2010 on the road in Europe and North America.
• Mariah Carey – 28-year-old husband Nick Cannon (“America’s Got Talent”) says they keep the romance alive when their work sends them to separate cities with ‘lots of phone sex’. (Uh, thanks for sharing.)
• Miley Cyrus – Tonight she returns to the stage in Auburn Hills MI after taking time out from her North American tour due to a sore throat.
• Ozzy Osbourne – He says the  MTV reality show “The Osbournes” (2002-05) was an ‘experiment that went wildly out of control’. He regrets doing it because the attention was ‘really creepy’. (Sort of like your family, man.)
• Pearl Jam – Frontman Eddie Vedder says he’s imposed a tight deadline on his creativity, allowing no more than a half-hour to write lyrics because he believes if he doesn’t find instant inspiration, he should just discard what he’s working on and move on to something better.
• Rascal Flatts – Today they reissue a limited edition of their “Greatest Hits Volume 1”, packaged in a silver foil-embossed keepsake box. The 2-disc set includes an audio interview, a foldout poster, and live versions of 4 tracks.
• U2 – While they are in the midst of their massive “360” tour that will take them around-the-world well into 2010, they’re already planning their next album, “Songs Of Ascent”, and according to The Edge, it’ll come ‘sooner rather than later’.


• “Imagine That” ( Fantasy Comedy ): Eddie Murphy plays a financial executive in a career down-spiral who is invited into his daughter’s imaginary world, where solutions to his problems await. Co-stars Thomas Haden Church & Vanessa Williams. Filmed on location in Denver CO.
• “My Life in Ruins” ( Comedy ): Screenwriter/actress Nia Vardalos (“My Big Fat Greek Wedding”) plays a travel guide who rediscovers her romantic side while squiring a group of tourists around Greece. Co-stars Hollywood veteran Richard Dreyfuss. Shot on location in Athens, Greece and Alicante, Spain.
• “Year One” ( Comedy Adventure ): Director/writer Harold Ramis’ prehistoric comedy stars Jack Black (“Kung Fu Panda”) & Michael Cera (“Juno”) as a pair of lazy hunter-gatherers who are banished from their primitive village, so they set off on an epic journey through their ancient world. Co-stars Olivia Wilde (“House MD”). Filmed in Louisiana and New Mexico.
• Also released today: “Ally McBeal: The Complete Series” (vintage TV); “Anvil! The Story of Anvil” (documentary); “Black Adder Remastered: The Ultimate Edition” (classic TV); “Bones: Season 4” (TV); “Ghostbusters 1 & 2” – Limited Edition Gift Set”; “The Hills: Season 5, Part 1” (TV); “Medium: The 5th Season” (TV); and “Nip/Tuck: Season 5, Part 2” (TV).

A statistical breakdown of life by the numbers …
• 90% of college-age kids have never used a ‘typewriter’.
• 83% of us say we are well aware of when our partners lie to us.
• 55% of women say they’d be willing to give up chocolate for an unlimited clothing budget.
• 19% of us have called in ‘sick’ at work because we were out of coffee at home.
• 11% of brides are pregnant on their wedding day.
• 8% of women and 2% of men will be stalked at sometime in their lives.

The ‘Constellation Ayxta’, the newest upscale cellphone from Nokia’s Vertu line, has gone on sale in Britain for … $7,760. The main reason it’s so pricey is the services that are included with the handset. One is the ‘Vertu Concierge’ service, a special button that connects to a 24-hour ‘lifestyle manager’ who can book plane tickets, order gifts, or find a plumber on short notice. Another is the ‘Vertu City Brief’, which automatically sets the clock when the user arrives in a new country, then provides info on the best local restaurants, plays, concerts, and events. (For 8-grand you’d kind of want this gizmo to fold out into a limo or something, no?)
– “Daily Telegraph”

• Zhong Lin Wang, a professor at the Georgia Institute of Technology’s College of Engineering is heading up a team that’s working on harnessing the energy of the body’s natural movements to power small devices. Even the simple act of moving your fingers while typing creates energy that could power a small device.
– CNN.com
• Lightning Packs is a company that is developing backpacks that generate electricity with the motion of their users. As the user walks, the spring-mounted backpack bounces slightly, turning a gear on a generator. It’s the brainchild of Lawrence Rome of the University of Pennsylvania, who hopes to market the idea to the US military.
– Gizmodo.com


Seems like everyone’s played one, from Jane Fonda to Charlize Theron. Here’s a new ranking of some of the best-loved ‘working ladies’ in the movies …
5. Elisabeth Shue, “Leaving Las Vegas” (1995).
4. Rebecca De Mornay, “Risky Business” (1983).
3. Jamie Lee Curtis, “Trading Places” (1983).
2. Patricia Arquette, “True Romance” (1993).
1. Julia Roberts, “Pretty Woman” (1990).
– HecklerSpray.com

Danish researchers predict more than half of babies born in the world’s wealthiest nations today will live to be 100-years-old if current life expectancy trends continue. Increasing numbers of very old people could pose major challenges for health and social systems, but the study shows that may be mitigated by people not only living longer, but also staying healthier in their latter years. (You know what this means? An extra 30 wedding anniversaries you gotta remember.)
– “NY Daily News”


A Dubai-based company is opening what it says will be the ‘World’s Largest Candy Store’ as it looks to tap into the Gulf region’s hunger for sweets. ‘Candylicious’, which initially opens in one of the world’s largest shopping centers, The Dubai Mall, is also planning a store in Singapore early next year. The 10,000-sq-ft flagship store will feature a huge 10-m (33-ft) singing chocolate tree decorated with lollipops. The company’s aiming for sales of $10 million annually.
– Reuters

• Touring bands often provide stats to their venues so they’ll know what to expect from their gig. The stats might include age appeal, male-to-female ratio, and a ranking from 1-to-10 of a typical crowd’s profile, whereby 1 equals a quiet/seated audience and 10 a wild and chaotic crowd.
• Ex-manager of WWE star ‘The Undertaker’, Paul Bearer, has a degree in mortuary science and manages a funeral home in his hometown of Mobile, Alabama.
• Among the endangered species activist community, the cutest species (the ones that can raise the most money) have a technical term. They are know as ‘Charismatic Mega-Fauna’ and the current top 3 are panda, whale, and tiger.
– PopBitch.com


1955 [54] Tony Dungy, Jackson MI, NFL analyst (“Football Night in America”)/former NFL head coach (Indianapolis Colts 2002-09, Tampa Bay Buccaneers 1996-2001)

1963 [46] Elisabeth Shue, Wilmington DE, movie actress (Oscar-“Leaving Las Vegas”)

1966 [43] Tim Rushlow, Midwest City OK, country singer (“She Misses Him”, Little Texas 1991-97)

1966 [43] Tommy Stinson, Minneapolis MN, rock bassist (Guns N’ Roses since 1998, The Replacements 1979–91)

1973 [36] Ioan Gruffudd [‘YO-an GRIFF-ith’], Cardiff, Wales, movie actor (“W”, “Fantastic Four” films)


• “Frugal Fun Day”. What can you do for free that’s a real blast? How about going to the mall to try on fancy dresses just for fun? Take a camera along to record your spree! Or maybe test drive all the vehicles you couldn’t possibly afford to buy?

• “German-American Day”, honoring the likes of Albert Einstein, Lou Gehrig, John Steinbeck & Levi Strauss. In fact,  German-American make up 16% of the total US population. Prosit!

• “Mad Hatter Day”, described as “April Fool’s Day” without the pranks, it’s an opportunity to celebrate silliness. The date was chosen from illustrations depicting the Mad Hatter wearing a hat with a slip of paper that reads: ‘In this style 10/6′.
NET: http://www.cs.cmu.edu/~ari/madHatter.html

• “Physician Assistant Day”, honoring all those nice people who order you to take off all your clothes and put the gown on. And make sure the opening’s at the back!

2000 [09] Hit comedy “Meet the Parents”, starring Robert De Niro, Ben Stiller, Teri Polo, and Blythe Danner, opens in movie theaters

1996 [13] Country stars Tim McGraw & Faith Hill get married, then postpone the honeymoon in order to resume their joint tour 4 days later

1893 [116] Breakfast staple “Cream Of Wheat” is introduced by Nabisco Foods (great for filling cracks in drywall!)

[Wed] Bald & Free Day
[Thurs] New Zealand Music Awards (Auckland)
[Thurs] Depression Screening Day
[Thurs] World Sight Day
[Fri] “Couples Retreat” opens in movie theaters
[Fri] Leif Erickson Day
[Fri] World Post Day
This Week Is … Carry a Tune Week
This Month Is … Adopt a Shelter Dog Month


Have a listener/studio guest/crew member guess which of the following are types of cheese and which are print fonts as you run down the list rapid-fire …
• Bocconcini  [cheese]
• Weimar [font]
• Clarendon [font]
• Tronchon [cheese]
• Barmeno [font]
• Richelieu [cheese]
• Cretino [font]
• Duroblando [cheese]
• Carnova [font]
• Montasio [cheese]
Get a few hundred more here …
NET: http://cheeseorfont.mogrify.org

Three men in a boat have some cigarettes but no matches. How do they light their cigarettes? They throw a cigarette overboard and make the boat … a cigarette lighter.

What gadget do you hate the most but can’t live without? (In a recent MIT survey, cellphones topped razors, alarm clocks and can openers.)

Get a listener with a calculator on the phone and mention you can reveal some very personal information about them. Then ask them to punch the following figures into the calculator without telling you what they are …
• The number of days a week that you’d like to have sex.
• Multiply this number by 2, then add 5.
• Multiply the answer by 50.
• If you’ve already had your birthday this year add 1759, if not add 1758.
• Now subtract the 4-digit year that you were born.
Ask them the resulting 3-digit number. The 1st digit tells how many days a week they’d like sex. The last 2 digits tells their age. Magic, isn’t it?


• Wow! It’s ‘Don’t Judge My Hair’, an entire website devoted to bad hairdos!
NET: http://dontjudgemyhair.com
• How many words or expressions can you think of to express the word ‘vomit’? There’s about 200 of them on ‘The Puke List’.
NET: http://www.taglinesgalore.com/ThePukeList.html

Today’s Question: The average woman will get 3 of THESE brand new every week.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Pieces of gossip.


A diplomat thinks twice before saying nothing.

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