Monday, October 19, 2009       Edition: #4124
Don’t Take Any Sheet, Unless It’s Pure Bull!


WEEKEND TABLOID & BLOG BS:

• 45-year-old actor Nicolas Cage has filed a $20-million lawsuit against his former business manager, accusing him of negligence and fraud which sent Cage ‘down a path toward financial ruin’. The suit alleges his recently-fired business manager failed to pay taxes when they were due and placed Cage in speculative and risky real estate investments resulting in ‘catastrophic losses’. (You know what this means … “National Treasure 3”).
– Reuters
• Mega-pregnant reality TV star Kourtney Kardashian (“Keeping Up With the Kardashians”) called police Saturday after discovering her Calabasas CA townhouse had been broken into and ransacked while she was out dining with boyfriend Scott Disick. Among the looted items: $30,000 Cartier watch, several diamonds, a Rolex timepiece, and vintage jewelry. (When will you learn? Always use a safe.)
– TMZ.com
• YouTube singing sensation Susan Boyle (“Britain’s Got Talent”) was admitted to hospital Saturday after suffering crippling stomach cramps at her home in West Lothian, Scotland. She was taken to a local hospital for emergency tests, then emerged hours later looking ‘drained’. (An unfortunate choice of wording.)
– “Daily Star”
• 35-year-old former “Baywatch” babe Angelica Bridges is suing her 33-year-old NHL player/ex-husband Sheldon Souray (Edmonton Oilers), alleging he tricked her into signing divorce papers so she couldn’t stake any claim to his new $27-million contract. She’s seeking $14 million in damages on top of the $18,000 monthly she receives in child support. According to the lawsuit, he somehow stick-handled her into the idea that a divorce would give them a ‘fresh start’. (She doesn’t sound like the fastest puck in the net.)
– WENN
• Spike TV’s “Scream 2009” honors, held Saturday at the Greek Theatre in Los Angeles, paid tribute to the best in sci-fi, horror, and fantasy films and TV shows. Vampire movie “Twilight” scored 4 awards, including ‘Best Fantasy Film’. Actress Megan Fox received ‘Best Sci-Fi’ actress for “Transformers: Revenge Of the Fallen”. (She’s queen of the geeks!)
• One of the favorite choreographers from one of TV’s favorite dance shows has quit. Yes, the rumors are true … Mia Michaels has left “So You Think You Can Dance” (FOX). The famed choreographer announced the news via Twitter: “I am officially an adoring fan of SYTYCD. Thank u for 5 wonderful yrs.” (Why couldn’t it be yappy Mary Murphy?)
– PopAwesome.com

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:

• “Behind The Music” (VH1) – 50 Cent
• “Jay Leno Show” (NBC/CityTV) – Rod Stewart (“Soulbook”, out October 26th).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – The Used (“Artwork”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Mat Kearney (“Nothing Left to Lose”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Roseanne Cash (“The List”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Brad Paisley – The “Welcome To the Future” singer is co-producing a new TV show for the CW Network, tentatively titled “Nashville”. The drama will focus on an aspiring young female singer destined for stardom and a male songwriter whose career prospects aren’t as certain.
• Daughtry – Tonight they launch a 36-date arena tour in Topeka KS in support of their latest album “Leave This Town”. Theory Of a Dead Man is also on the bill.
• Madonna – She’s being sued by a neighbor who lives a floor above her in a Manhattan building for allegedly using her apartment as rehearsal space. The neighbor claims high-decibel, amplified music is causing ‘noise and vibration through the walls, ceilings and radiators’.
• Nine Inch Nails – Saturday Trent Reznor reportedly wed his musician-girlfriend Mariqueen Maandig, a member of the group called West Indian Girl.
• Our Lady Peace – Tonight they kick off a headlining tour in Solana Beach CA to support their new album “Burn Burn”.
• Shakira – The 32-year-old “She Wolf” singer has revealed she took a break from the music biz and enrolled in a history course at UCLA back in 2006. She says she managed to stay in cognito by … dressing like a guy.
• Toby Keith – “American Ride” has debuted at #1 on the “Billboard” Country Albums chart.

MOST-LIKED SPORTS FIGURES:

A new ranking of favorite athletes based on their like-ability …
5. Chris Paul, basketball (New Orleans Hornets) … liked by 66%.
4. Rafael Nadal, tennis … 68%.
3. Kurt Warner, football (Arizona Cardinals) … 69%.
2. Larry Fitzgerald, football (Arizona Cardinals) … 71%.
1. Shawn Johnson, gymnastics … 75%.
(Honorable mention: golfer Tiger Woods, bull rider Ty Murray.)
– Adapted from Forbes.com.

WOMEN VS MEN:

According to a recent survey of 400 psychiatrists, women generally find a man’s personality to be his most sexually appealing trait, followed by his interest in her, his facial appearance, body proportions, and signs of success. Men, on the other hand, think a woman’s body proportions are her most attractive feature, followed by her facial appearance, personality, and her interest in him. (Seems women are right … men ARE shallow!)
– “Psychology Today”

TOP ANIMATED MOVIES:
A survey of 4,000 film buffs finds these are the all-time favorite animated films …
5. “Ice Age”
4. “Finding Nemo”
3. “The Lion King”
2. “Shrek”
1. “Toy Story”
– OnePollCashback.com

DOC, I CAN’T FEEL THE STAPLES:
According to a team of researchers from Minnesota’s Mayo Clinic, a large number of patients who have stomach surgery to lose weight develop peripheral nerve damage and complain of pain, tingling and/or numbness. Researchers believe the damage is caused by malnutrition as the body’s capacity to absorb nutrients deteriorates after the surgery. The bottom line –  nerve damage is a frequent consequence of weight-reduction surgery. (Dammit, you just can’t get around this ‘diet and exercise’ deal.)
– ANI Science & Health

10 THINGS THAT YOU SHOULD NEVER BUY NEW:
1. Books
2. DVDs, CDs and Videos
3. Little Kids’ Toys
4. Jewelry
5. Sports Equipment
6. Timeshares
7. Cars
8. Software & Console Games
9. Office Furniture
10. Hand Tools
– MSN Money

COME SAIL AWAY:
An Australian schoolgirl bidding to become the ‘Youngest to Sail Solo Around-the-World’ began her journey Sunday, despite urging from officials to abandon the perilous endurance test. 16-year-old Jessica Watson set sail on her bright pink yacht from Sydney Harbour amid cheers from well-wishers and accompanied by a collection of kayakers and small boats. In August, 17-year-old Brit Mike Perham became the youngest to circumnavigate the globe by sail power. (Should these people have to post a bond to cover potential rescue costs?)
– AFP

6 THINGS THAT WILL HELP YOU SLEEP:
• Cookies & Milk: The tryptophan in milk will help you feel sleepy, but you need some carbs to get it where you want it to go in your brain.
• Electric Fan – Lower temperatures signal your body that it’s time to sleep. A fan also generates soothing ‘white noise’.
• Lavender: Studies show that the effects of herbal fragrances such as lavender reduce stress levels and help increase relaxation.
• Luxe Sheets – Silky, natural-fiber bed linens provide soothing comfort, thereby encouraging you to nod off.
• Sleep Mask: Helps block out light that can cause restlessness.
• Sound Machine: A sound machine (ie: the kind that imitates ocean waves) can help drown out annoying noises around you. An alternative is inexpensive earplugs, available at most pharmacies.
– Condensed from BestHealthMag.ca.

BS AMAZING FACTS:

• Your hearing is sharpest just before sunup. (I SAY YOUR HEARING IS … oh never mind.)
• Your goldfish can get a headache from you tapping on the tank. (Get out the teeny Tylenols.)
• British ice cream isn’t made from ‘cream’ at all; it’s made from pig fat. (Hog Ripple … yum!)
– GreatFacts.com

BS CHRONOMETER 10.19.09


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1931 [78] John Le Carré (David Cornwell), Poole UK, best-selling novelist whose books get made into movies (“The Constant Gardener”, “The Tailor of Panama”)

1945 [64] John Lithgow, Rochester NY, movie actor (“Dreamgirls”, “Kinsey”)/TV actor (“The National Parks: America’s Best Idea” 2009, “3rd Rock From the Sun” 1996-2001)

1964 [45] Ty Pennington, Atlanta GA, TV home improvement guru (“Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” since 2003, “Trading Spaces” 2000-04)

1969 [40] Trey Parker, Conifer CO, TV producer/writer (“South Park”)/movie producer/director (“Team America: World Police”)

1972 [37] Pras (Prakazrel Michel), Brooklyn NY, rapper/musician (Fugees-“Killing Me Softly”, “Ready or Not”)

1976 [33] Cyndi Thomson, Tifton GA, country singer (“What I Really Meant to Say”, “I Always Liked That Best”)

1977 [32] Jason Reitman, Montréal QC, filmmaker (“Juno”, “Thank You for Smoking”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Evaluate Your Life Day”, a time to ‘sit back and reflect on your contribution to humanity and see if you’re really heading toward where you want to be’. Hey, it shouldn’t take long.

• “Hurricane Thanksgiving Day”, celebrated annually in the Virgin Islands on the 3rd Monday of October since 1726 to give thanks when the summer storm season passes them by.

• “World Osteoporosis Day”, focusing awareness on a major cause of bone fractures in the older population. Osteoporosis is a disease in which the density and quality of bone is reduced, increasing the risk of fracture. It affects around 1-in-3 women and 1-in-5 men worldwide.

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1919 [90] 1st team to ‘throw’ a World Series (Chicago’s loss to Reds becomes known as the ‘Black Sox Scandal’)

TODAY’S RECORDS . . .

1872 [137] ‘World’s Largest Gold Nugget’ found in New South Wales, Australia (215 kg/473 lbs)

1980 [29] Steve McPeak rides ‘World’s Largest Unicycle’ (101-ft, 9-inches tall)

COMING UP . . .

[Tues] BBC Electric Proms (London)
[Wed] Support Your Local Chamber of Commerce Day
[Thurs] Caps Locks Day
[Thurs] International Stuttering Awareness Day
[Sat] UN Day

THIS WEEK IS . . .

Businesswomen’s Week / Character Counts Week / Chemistry Week / Food & Drug Interaction Education & Awareness Week / Food Bank Week / Forest Products Week / Freedom From Bullies Week / Freedom of Speech Week / Hospital & Health-System Pharmacy Week / Infertility Awareness Week / Lead Poisoning Prevention Week / Massage Therapy Week / School Bus Safety Week / Teen Read Week / YWCA Week Without Violence

BULL’S BITS


BEST OF BS:
A highlight bit culled from 16 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
BS EGGSISTENTIALISM:
According to psychologist Dr Beryl West, how you like your eggs reveals a lot about your personality. For instance …
• Sunny Side Up – You are optimistic and easygoing.
• Over Easy – You are very precise and know exactly what you want out of life.
• Soft Boiled – You’re gentle, sensitive and neat, but not always easy to please.
• Hard Boiled – You’re a no-nonsense type, quick to form opinions.
• Scrambled – You’re agreeable and steady, you go with the flow.
• Poached – You are very orderly and don’t like to see anything out of its place.
• Omelette – You enjoy taking risks.
NET: http://www.FreeRadioPrep.com

BS RANDOM JOKE:
The last time I was in Mexico I went through 6 John Grisham novels. I must remember to take enough toilet paper next time.

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
• What animal did researchers study when designing the modern football helmet?
a. Bull.
b. Ram.
c. Woodpecker. [CORRECT. Football helmets were designed with air spaces to act as shock absorbers, just like the skull of a woodpecker.]

• Before he was Muhammad Ali, he was …
a. Sugar Ray Robinson.
b. Cassius Clay. [CORRECT. The former world heavyweight boxing champ changed his name after joining the Nation of Islam in 1964, subsequently converting to orthodox Islam in 1975.]
c. Rudolph Valentino.

BS PHONE STARTER:

Who’s the funniest person alive?

BS WEB GOODIE:
Klenginem is a German rapper who performs in the Klingon language, mostly modified Eminem songs.
YouTube performance …
NET: http://tinyurl.com/ykyq8oo
Official website …
NET: http://www.klenginem.de/e/home.html

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:

Today’s Question: More than half of men no longer know how to do THIS.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Tie a necktie.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:

When money talks there are few interruptions.


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