October 29, 2009

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Thursday, October 29, 2009        Edition: #4132
Here’s Sheet In Your Eye!

The traveling festival of female artists, Lilith Fair (1997-99), will be resurrected with an 18-city tour in 2010 that will take in NYC, LA, Chicago, Vancouver, Toronto, and London among others (NET: http://www.lilithfair.com) . . . A group of 25 publishers, producers, and musicians in Europe are asking YouTube to hand over server logs showing who uploaded, as well as watched, their material (sue your fans – great marketing plan there!) . . . In his new memoir “Open”, former tennis ace Andre Agassi has stunned the sports world by revealing he was hooked on crystal meth at the height of his career in the late 1990s (maybe that’s why he found Steffi Graf attractive?) . . . Movie actor Michael Madsen (“Kill Bill”, “Thelma & Louise”) has joined the growing ranks of Hollywood’s cash-strapped, facing eviction from his Malibu CA home because he owes $80,000 in back rent (this guy’s been in well over a hundred movies – what do these people do with all their bucks?) . . . Author Ian Halperin’s new book “Brangelina Exposed” (out December 1st) suggests that Hollywood’s ‘royal couple’ have manipulated the public into believing a glamorous fairytale that bears little resemblance to the reality of their life together (anyone surprised?) . . . Another mini-“Friends” reunion is being planned as Lisa Kudrow is joining the cast of Courteney Cox’s new series “Cougar Town” (ABC) on an episode to air next year (the cast’s record for TV success since “Friends” is about 0-for-12) . . . And stupormodel Naomi Campbell is fighting a stinky lawsuit, claiming that allegations she cut her former managers out of a perfume deal they helped negotiate are ‘ridiculous and absurd’ (BS translation: let’s make a deal).


• BFI London Film Festival (UK) – The world premiere of Sam Taylor-Wood’s “Nowhere Boy” closes this year’s 16-day festival, the story of the early life of John Lennon in 1950s Liverpool.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/A Channel) – Taylor Swift (“Fearless”); Tim McGraw (“Southern Voice”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Rod Stewart (“Soulbook”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Black Lips (“Good Bad Not Evil”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – Mastodon (“Blood Mountain”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Weezer (“Raditude”).
• Rock & Roll Hall of Fame 25th Anniversary Concerts (NYC) – Tonight part 1 of the 2-day festivities at Madison Square Garden includes performances by Crosby Stills & Nash, Paul Simon, Stevie Wonder, Sting. And Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band will perform as planned, even though they’re grieving the loss of their assistant road manager.
• “Tonight Show With Conan O’Brien” (NBC/A Channel) – The Swell Season (“Strict Joy”).
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Sting (“If On A Winter’s Night …”).


• Beyoncé – When shooting the video for her new single “Video Phone”, collaborator Lady Gaga told her she wanted to mimic her version of Beyoncé which she called ‘GEYonce’.
• Bon Jovi – In the new documentary film, “Bon Jovi: When We Were Beautiful”, drummer Tico Torres admits he was killing himself with booze in the early 1990s until his bandmates urged him to seek help, so he turned to band psychologist Lou Cox. (That’s an actual job?)
• Justin Timberlake – It’s come to light that the female stalker he’s had a restraining order filed against targeted Metallica and Axl Rose in the past. (She sure has eclectic musical tastes.)
• Katy Perry – She & Brit actor/comedian Russell Brand seem to be fast-tracking their new relationship, reports suggesting they’re already looking for a Hollywood Hills home to share.
• Michael Bublé – He nearly missed making a love connection with his Argentine girlfriend Luisana Lopilato because he spent so long chatting to her male friend, she thought he was gay.
• Rob Zombie – The horror film director gets back into rocker mode, kicking off a tour in Phoenix AZ. His new album, “Hellbilly Deluxe 2: Noble Jackals, Penny Dreadfuls & The Systematic Dehumanization of Cool”, has now been delayed to an undetermined 2010 date.
• U2 – They’ll perform a free concert in front of the Brandenburg Gate in Berlin, Germany on November 5th to help the city celebrate 20 years since the fall of the Berlin Wall.

A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “Faces In the Crowd” – Milla Jovovich (“Resident Evil” films) will star in this psychological thriller about a woman who barely survives an attack by a serial killer and wakes up in hospital with a head injury that leaves her no longer able to recognize faces (a disorder called ‘prosopagnosia’). All the while the killer is closing in, determined to eliminate the potential witness. Filming on the project begins next spring.
• “Hungry Rabbit Jumps” – This upcoming dramatic thriller stars Nicolas Cage as an average guy who becomes mixed up with an underground vigilante organization after his wife (“Mad Men” actress January Jones) becomes the victim of a brutal crime. “Spider-Man” actor Tobey Maguire is co-producing the film. Shooting is scheduled to begin in January in New Orleans LA.
• “Jack & Jill” – Actor/comedian Adam Sandler will next star in and co-produce this upcoming romantic comedy in which he will play ‘Jack’ and – try to picture this – his twin sister ‘Jill’ as well. The flick is scheduled to begin production early next year and will be released in early 2011.


The UN’s World Health Organization claims that tackling just a handful of health factors could prevent millions of premature deaths and increase global life expectancy by almost 5 years. According to a new report, poor childhood nutrition; unsafe sex; alcohol use; lack of safe water, hygiene & sanitation; and high blood pressure are to blame for about a quarter of the 60 million premature deaths around-the-world annually. And while many are starving in poor countries, obesity in rich nations now causes more deaths worldwide than being underweight. (Go ahead, chubby … have another donut.)
– VOANews.com


The secret to a happy marriage for men is choosing a wife who is smarter and at least 5 years younger, according to a new study at the UK’s University of Bath. These pairings are more likely to go the distance, particularly if neither has been divorced in the past. The findings are based on a study of more than 1,500 couples. (If she’s smarter & younger, why would she be interested?)
– “Globe & Mail”

Software vendors in Beijing are already selling pirated versions of Microsoft’s “Windows 7” operating system less than a week after its official China release on October 23rd. Roughly 30% of vendors surveyed are offering pirated versions. Though Microsoft is offering the world’s cheapest retail price to Chinese customers at 399 yuan ($58) each, many users apparently still think it is too expensive. (Especially considering Google Chrome will apparently be free.)
– “Metro”

Simon Hare & family of Roxbury MA are embarking on a bold experiment in green living … spending an entire winter without furnace-supplied heat. Their airtight, well-insulated house is part of a growing movement to design and build extremely green dwellings by rethinking what is essential. The 2-story cottage will be warmed by the Sun, body heat, and whatever warmth is generated by energy-efficient appliances. How will they survive a February cold snap? Hare says they’ll heat the house by making a 2nd batch of pancakes for his young daughter. (Oh to be a long-john salesman in this neighborhood!)
– “Boston Globe”


In a new study in Scotland, male students aged 18-to-26 at St Andrews University have been asked to rate female faces for attractiveness and health. The results show that girls with an average weight and build are ranked as being the most attractive and healthy. Researchers say the findings send out a strong message to young women who believe being underweight is considered attractive. (It’s all about learning curves.)
– BBC News


A website that sells a treatment similar to Botox without requiring a prescription claims it’s had more than 2,000 customers. Discountmedspa sells a variety of cosmetic treatments, including the botulinum toxin-derivative called Dysport. It’s produced by pharmaceutical company Ipsen and is a competitor of Allergan’s Botox. The site simply calls it ‘The Freeze’. And here’s the really creepy part: the site offers how-to videos for those wanting to learn how to to inject the botulism-derived drug into their own faces. (As much fun as fixing your own detached retina.)
NET: http://www.discountmedspa.com
– “Wired”

Kellogg’s, which makes 67 million boxes of Corn Flakes every year, has developed a hi-tech method to stamp out imitations … branding their flakes with the company logo. The new technology enables it to be burned onto individual flakes using lasers. After a series of trial batches, it will be decided whether to insert a proportion of branded flakes into each box to guarantee the cereal’s origins. (Why not put something interesting on them like fortunes?)
– “Daily Telegraph”


Some of the more successful brother acts in show biz …
• Actors Luke & Owen Wilson (debuted together in “Bottle Rocket”, co-starred in “The Royal Tenenbaums”).
• Actors Ben & Casey Affleck (“Good Will Hunting”, Ben’s directorial debut, “Gone Baby Gone”).
• Fimmakers the Coen Bros (“No Country For Old Men”).
• Donnie & Mark Wahlberg (both went from music into acting but have never appeared together).
• Filmmakers the Wachowski Bros (“The Matrix” trilogy).
• Actors Emilio Estevez & Charlie Sheen (have worked together in just 1 movie, “Men at Work”).
• Filmmakers the Farrelly Bros (“There’s Something About Mary”, “Dumb & Dumber”).
And the worst brothers combination in show biz …
• Alec Baldwin and the ‘lesser Baldwins’ … Daniel, Billy & Stephen.
– PopEater.com


Scientists are planning to store sea coral in cryogenic vaults so the world’s vanishing reefs can be rebuilt in the future. Why? Researchers now predict that the world’s reefs will be reduced to slime-covered rubble by 2050. Plans have already been developed for a prototype ‘Coral Ark’ at the UK’s London Zoo to store coral from the Caribbean, which has some of the worst devastation. Coral reefs are built by living creatures and support up to a third of Earth’s marine life. (So listen up, vacation snorkellers – quit standing on them!)
– “The Observer”


• Fear of Halloween is known as ‘samhainophobia’.
• Douglas Engelbart invented a large foot-operated control called a ‘rat’ for the computer in the late 1950s but it never caught on. What did catch on 20 years after he invented it was the computer ‘mouse’.
– DidYouKnow.org


1947 [62] Richard Dreyfuss, Brooklyn NY, movie actor (“W”, “Mr Holland’s Opus”)

1957 [52] Dan Castellaneta, Chicago IL, voice-over actor (‘Homer’ on “The Simpsons” since 1989)

1971 [38] Winona Ryder (Horowitz), Winona MN, movie actress (“Star Trek”, “Girl Interrupted”)

• “Basketball Coaches Day”, honoring those dedicated people who teach us to dribble & shoot.

• “Hermit Day”, a salute to the solitary lifestyle … whether or not you planned on living it.

• “Internet Day”, observed on the 40th anniversary of the 1st connection on what would become the ‘Internet’. On October 29, 1969 bits of data flowed between computers at UCLA and the Stanford Research Institute. Within a year, 10 sites were connected and there were soon applications such as email.

• “Laugh a Lot Suddenly For No Reason Day” … just before they lock you up in a padded room.

• “World Psoriasis Day”, an annual observance to increase awareness of the life-long skin disorder that causes red, scaly patches called lesions to appear on skin. It’s estimated some 125 million people worldwide are suffering the malady.
NET: http://www.worldpsoriasisday.com

1983 [26] Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side Of the Moon” becomes ‘Longest-Charting Album of All-Time’ as it logs its 491st week on the “Billboard” ‘Top 200′ album chart (lasts 740 weeks altogether until July 13, 1988)

1889 [120] Vancouver’s popular Stanley Park is dedicated

1945 [64] 1st ‘Ballpoint Pen’ goes on sale, 57 years after it was first patented ($12.95)

1929 [80] Montréal and Toronto Stock Exchange shares plummet in their worst drop to date, as the New York market crash spreads quickly worldwide and leads to the Great Depression

1998 [11] 77-year-old return astronaut, US Senator John Glenn, becomes ‘Oldest Person to Travel in Space’ aboard the space shuttle “Discovery”


[Fri] Create a Great Funeral Day
[Fri] Devil’s Night
[Fri] International Bandanna Day
[Fri] Frankenstein Friday
[Sat] Halloween
[Sat] Magic Day
[Sat] UNICEF Day
This Week Is … Disarmament Week
This Month Is … Domestic Violence Awareness Month


• Used up all my Mentos during production of my latest YouTube video.
• Too busy installing “Windows 7” patches to buy candy.
• Still haven’t gotten over the fact Mother was killed by a peanut M&M.
• Candy ordered on Amazon hasn’t arrived yet.
• Calculated the cost-benefit ratio, and saw all cost and no benefit.
• Better sales on candy on November 1st.
• All the kids in this neighborhood are too fat already … including you, Porky.
– Adapted from – BBSpot.com.


What makes someone a ‘success’?


Hasbro’s special new “Trivial Pursuit Team” website is staging a battle of the sexes through the end of the year.  So far women are kicking butt, leading the challenge over men by 58% to 42%. Anyone can play, you just sign in free, giving your gender and age.
NET: http://www.trivialpursuitexperiment.com

Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.


Today’s Question: On average, 150 couples do THIS every day.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Get married in Las Vegas.


The best defence against logic is stupidity.

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