Monday, October 15, 2007              Edition: #3633
Eat, Breath Sheet!

WEEKEND TABLOID & BLOG BS:
• OJ’s likely to be caged after this canary sings! Charles Cashmore, one of OJ Simpson’s co-defendants in the sports memorabilia armed robbery case, is planning to cop a plea and turn state’s evidence. Word is he’ll plead guilty to accessory to robbery in Las Vegas court TODAY. Meanwhile, a preliminary hearing has been set for NOVEMBER 8th, when prosecutors will present evidence against OJ in an effort to take his case to trial.
– Yahoo! News
• This is how you do publicity in 2007. 26-year-old actress Samaire Armstrong from the new ABC-TV show “Dirty Sexy Money” (ex-“The OC”) has entered an outpatient facility to deal with ‘personal issues in a therapeutic atmosphere’. She will reportedly complete her treatment in a matter of weeks while she continues to work on the show.
– “People Magazine”
• You need a permit to put jail-bait onstage in New York! The “American Idol” powers-that-be at 19 Entertainment have agreed to pay a $5,000 fine for child-labor violations stemming from this past summer’s “American Idols Live!” tour. They’ve been dinged for employing 2 minors without the proper work permits: the latest winner, Jordin Sparks, and the famously infamous Sanjaya Malakar. Fortunately, Sanjaya was not also cited for hair pollution.
– “E! News”
• The owner of a Porsche hit by actor Orlando Bloom on FRIDAY says the actor was trying to outrun paparazzi and never even stopped to apologize for some $7,000-worth of damage. Bloom was driving a borrowed 2003 Toyota Matrix when he was cut off by another driver and, as a result, hit the parked car. Two female passengers in Bloom’s car suffered injuries in the fender-bender. His rep says one was a ‘childhood friend’. Authorities have ruled out alcohol or drugs as a cause of the incident. That was easy to do … Orly doesn’t partake.
– TMZ.com
• Think she’ll keep him fat & happy? “Price Is Right“/“Power of 10“ host Drew Carey has become engaged to girlfriend Nicole Jaracz but they’ve yet to set a date. The bride-to-be is a recent graduate of a culinary school. Seems the way to this guy’s heart really is through his stomach.
– “Star Magazine”
• 39-year-old movie director Robert Rodriguez & 34-year-old actress Rose McGowan are also engaged, barely a year after meeting each other on the “Planet Terror” set, part of the “Grindhouse” colaboration with Quentin Tarantino. McGowan was previously engaged to shock-rocker Marilyn Manson. Well then, she obviously has taste.
– “NY Post”
• Pseudo-singer/wannabe actress Jessica Simpson has just signed a $4-million deal with Proactiv facial cleansing products to appear in … infomercials. You know your career is tanking when …
– ContactMusic.com
• There’s soon going to be need for a post-Kate group therapy program! 28-year-old actress Kate Hudson is slashing & burning her way through mankind … first rocker Chris Robinson, then actor Owen Wilson, and now she’s reportedly dumped her most recent actor boyfriend Dax Shepard. A friend says she wants to spend more time concentrating on her 3-year-old son and isn’t interested in a serious romance. Poor Dax is said to be devastated.
– “In Touch Weekly”
• Is movie star Owen Wilson turning to ancient Native American remedies to rid himself of depression? During a recent road trip he and his brothers checked out the new glass walkway that looks directly down into the Grand Canyon. While there, a Hualapai medicine man reportedly performed a cleansing ceremony, waving sage over the actor’s head while dancing and chanting for a half-hour. Wow man, that was really good … er, sage.
– “National Enquirer”

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Joe Nichols – He canceled a SATURDAY concert in Waco TX after being hospitalized and unable to perform. He then immediately entered a substance abuse rehab program. Ironically, the 31-year-old country singer’s new single is titled … “Let’s Get Drunk and Fight”.
• Rolling Stones – Mick Jagger’s ex-wife Jerry Hall has just signed a $2-million deal to reveal all about their 9-year marriage in an autobiography. The former couple have 4 children together.
• Sammy Hagar – The one-time Van Halen frontman celebrated his 60th birthday on the weekend at his club in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. Among those helping him party: country stars Kenny Chesney & Toby Keith, Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer Chad Smith, celebrity chef Emeril Lagasse, and rocker Ted Nugent.
• Sheryl Crow – She’s struck a deal with Winnipeg-based Western Glove Works to develop and market a denim-based clothing line named ‘Bootheel Trading Company by Sheryl Crow’, debuting in Fall 2008.
• TI – SATURDAY he was arrested just hours before he was to perform at the “BET Hip-Hop Awards” in Atlanta, in a parking lot where federal officials claim he was planning to pick up machine guns and silencers his bodyguard bought for him. The 27-year-old rapper is due in court to face weapons charges TODAY. And oh yeah, he won 2 awards … but couldn’t be there to accept them.

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• Evanescence – The band’s latest lineup is on “The View” (ABC/CTV).
• “The Farnsworth Invention” – A new Broadway show about the advent of television from writer Aaron Sorkin (“Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip”, “The West Wing”) opens for preview performances, starring Hank Azaria (“The Simpsons”).
• 50 Cent – He’s on “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS). Hasn’t ‘retired’ yet then?
• Frankie Valli – The 70-year-old former Four Seasons frontman is on “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC).
• Gloria Estefan – She performs on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC).
• Kenny Rogers – To mark his 50-year career in the music biz, he’s being honored with a ‘Golden Note Award’ for lifetime achievement from the American Society of Composers, Authors & Publishers (ASCAP) at the Ryman Auditorium in Nashville. Wonder if he’s had his face tightened for the occasion?

CHEAP SOUVENIRS:
A study by the University of Manchester Institute of Science & Technology concludes that, of all international consumers, Brits have the worst habit of taking things from hotel rooms. It’s estimated that up to 5% of hotel towels disappear each year in the UK. One chain alone loses more than a half-million a year to light-fingered customers. (What embarrassing slogan could you print on them to prevent theft? How about ‘Holiday Inn’?).
– “Hartford Courant”

WAR, WHAT IS IT GOOD FOR?
According to William Blum’s new book “Killing Hope: US Military & CIA Interventions Since World War II”, the US has bombed 23 nations since the end of the Second World War. The list begins with China in 1945-46, includes Korea (1950-53), Vietnam (1961-73), Libya (1983), Panama (1989), Yugoslavia (1999), and continues with the war in Iraq. (And how many of these countries have gone on to become healthy democracies?)
– “Curious Times”

HOT SHOT SENIORS:
Noticed how more and more food products are getting ultra-hot ‘n spicy? It’s not just that our palettes are becoming more international in scope; market researchers think there’s another hidden reason for the big shift toward bold flavors: members of the huge, trend-setting Baby Boom generation are getting old … and losing their ability to taste. So they’re turning to spicier, high-flavor foods to overcome their dulled senses. (Mmm, habanero porridge for breakfast!)
– “Boston Globe”

BS LAW & DISORDER:
• In St Petersburg, Florida an infuriated mom has been charged with misdemeanor battery after boarding her son’s school bus and … slapping around the bully who’d been tormenting him. The boy’s sister also got in on the act, hitting the meanie a couple of times upside the head. (Great thinking family! Now the poor little momma’s boy is gonna be picked on mercilessly.)
• In Punjab province, India a video journalist has been charged with abetting suicide for allegedly persuading a depressed businessman to kill himself … for a TV show! Fortunately, police intervened in time and arrested both men before poison could be administered. Faked stories have become increasingly frequent on Indian television. A week before the suicide bid, a  reporter in New Delhi was charged with staging riots in order to get some stimulating footage. (It’s ‘unreality TV’.)
• In Cambridge, Massachusetts cops entered an apartment to arrest man wanted for theft. As they were about to handcuff him, they happened to notice some stolen parking meters stashed about the joint … 123 of them to be exact! (Now, in addition to robbery, he’s facing 123 parking tickets.)

WHAT YOUR DESK SAYS ABOUT YOU:
Theo Theobald, co-author of the new book “Detox Your Desk: Declutter Your Life & Mind”, says that for many workers, their desks have become a metaphor for their whole working persona: unorganized, overworked, and no sense of order. Cluttered desks drag us down, sap our energy, and reduce our efficiency, she claims. And forget about that old adage that a messy desk is the sign of a creative mind. The real truth, she says, is that many workers have ‘abdicated responsibility for any degree of control over their lives’. (Oh pardon us, we just thought we were too lazy to clean up.)
– “The Guardian”

SCARIEST FASHION TRENDS EVER:
5. Tie-Dye
4. The Dancer Look
3. Flannel
2. Shoulder Pads
1. Acid-Wash Ripped Jeans
– “Ladies’ Home Journal”

CRACK ME UP:
49-year-old Colombian artist Doris Salcedo has spent 6 months and circa $600,000 to create a crack in the floor of the Tate Modern art gallery in London. Why? It’s a ‘sculpture’, entitled “Shibboleth”, that starts as a hairline crack and widens out to about 30 cm (12 in) as it winds some 167 meters (548 ft) through Turbine Hall. The work is aimed at highlighting divisions in society. As a result of the exhibition, the gallery is forced to hand out a leaflet to visitors, advising them to watch their step. (This could save all kinds of money on repairs … “No, that’s not a hole in the window … that’s an artwork.”)
– Ananova News Service

BS AMAZING FACTS:
• Bankrate.com has gathered together a list of little expenses that can really add up quickly to a lot of money. The worst culprits? Coffee, alcohol, manicures, and unused gym memberships.
• Technology research firm Gartner Inc predicts that by 2011, 80% of active Internet users will have a ‘second life’ in some sort of online virtual world.

BS CHRONOMETER 10.15.07

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1959 [48] Emeril Lagasse, Fall River MA, TV chef born to a Portuguese mother & French-Canadian father (Food Network-“Essence of Emeril”, “Emeril Live”)/restaurateur (owns 10 restaurants in New Orleans, Las Vegas, Orlando, etc)  QUOTE: “Bam!”

1959 [48] Sarah Ferguson (‘Fergie’), London UK, Duchess of York/Prince Andrew’s ex-/Weight Watchers spokesperson/sometime newspaper columnist

1969 [38] Vanessa Marcil, Indio CA, TV actress (‘Sam Marquez’ on “Las Vegas” since 2003)

1970 [37] Ginuwine (Elgin Baylor Lumpkin), Washington DC, hip-hop singer (“In Those Jeans”, “Differences”)

1981 [26] Keyshia Cole, Oakland CA, R&B singer/songwriter (“Let It Go”, “(I Just Want It) to Be Over”)

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Hurricane Thanksgiving Day” in the Virgin Islands, an observance since 1726 in which locals celebrate having survived another hurricane season.

• “My Mom is a Student Day”, when kids are encouraged to show support for moms who’ve gone back to school by giving gifts of school supplies. (They should also ask mom at least 27 times if she’s finished her homework.)

• “National Grouch Day”, a day to be grumpy, ungrateful and cantankerous, and a day to allow grouches everywhere time to spout off.

• “World Poetry Day”, a good day to sample some ‘modern poetry’ by reading the inane lyrics to a hit song over a mushy violin background track. You can find dumb lyrics online here …
NET: http://www.lyrics.com

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1973 [34] Patsy Cline becomes the first female solo performer inducted into the “Country Music Hall of Fame”

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1981 [26] 1st ‘wave’ created in a sports stadium by professional cheerleader George Henderson (aka ‘Krazy George’) at Oakland-Alameda Coliseum, Oakland CA

TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
1991 [16] World’s ‘Tallest Sand Castle’ is topped off at 19.5 feet

1993 [14] ‘Largest Cookie’ measures 1,001 square feet and includes 3 million chocolate chips (Arcadia CA)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Tues] Dictionary Day
[Tues] World Food Day
[Wed] Gaudy Day
[Wed] London Film Festival opens
[Thurs] Persons Day (Canada)
[Thurs] Ozzy Osbourne-Rob Zombie tour begins (Seattle)
[Thurs] No Beard Day

THIS WEEK IS . . .
Businesswomen’s Week / Character Counts Week / Credit Union Week / Food Bank Week / Freedom From Bullies at Work Week / Getting the World to Beat a Path to Your Door Week / Health Education Week / Infection Prevention Week / International Pinball Week / Kraut Sandwich Week / Peace With Justice Week / School Bus Safety Week / YMCA Teen Week / World Rainforest Week

BULL’S BITS

BS ‘FIVE-IN-TEN GAME’:
Your contestant gets 10 seconds to list 5 things in each category …
• 5 sports only girls play.
• 5 kinds of soup.
• 5 excuses for getting home late.
• 5 places you might hide a birthday gift.
• 5 things that make the foulest odors you can think of.

BS PHONE STARTER:
If you could be the house cat or lap dog of any person on Earth, whose would you choose to be?

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Save your breath, [co-host]. You’re gonna need it later to blow up your date.

BS WEB GOODIE:
“I Hate Young People” is a site where Grams & Gramps can go to whine about the youth of today. Posted videos complain about the spoiled brats & the shenanigans they get up to.
NET: http://ihateyoungpeople.com/

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: Experts say you need to perform THIS 108 times in order for it to work.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: A mantra.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
When the going gets tough, the tough use duct tape.

BS FRESH MEAT:
A big bellow out to Chris Kuchar @ KBS [CJAT] Trail BC, back for another 3 months of “BS”; and we welcome samplers that include Sharrona Steinem @ 97.9 The Loop [WLUP] Chicago IL; Craig Fox @ Country 107.3 [CJDL] Tillsonburg ON; Chris White @ 104.9 The Wolf [CFWF] Regina SK; Sean Cole @ The Feel Good Station, Noblesville IN; John Hubbard @ 103.9 Triple-T, Townsville, Australia; Keith Andrews @ FOX FM [CFGW] Yorkton SK; Paul Dinger @ AllHitz 97.7 [WLER] Butler PA; and Josh Juhlke @ 90.1 The Heat [CRNC] Niagara’s New Rock.


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