Tuesday, October 2, 2007        Edition: #3625
We’ve Got Our Sheet Together!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Word has it “Desperate Housewives” star Eva Longoria is the latest celeb with a racy video floating around, Britain’s “Sun” tabloid claiming it contains intimate scenes of her & NBA star husband Tony Parker (it’s apparently already available on pay-per-view adult film sites) . . . Oprah Winfrey tops the new “Forbes” list of 2007′s richest TV celebs ($260 million), perhaps surprisingly followed by Jerry Seinfeld ($60 million) thanks to seemingly endless reruns of his sitcom, and “American Idol’s” Simon Cowell with $45 million (Kiefer Sutherland is #10, which is still way over .08) . . . Filmmaker Steven Spielberg is considering axing all scenes featuring 24-year-old actor Tyler Nelson from the upcoming movie “Indiana Jones & the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull” after the young actor got all excited and leaked the storyline to an Oklahoma newspaper (we’re betting this is just another well-staged ‘leak’ akin to Shia LaBeouf’s blabbing the ‘secret’ title at the MTV Video Music Awards) . . . Double Oscar-winning actress Hilary Swank says she has no intentions of following in the footsteps of other stars by launching her own perfume brand because she thinks that current celeb craze is … ‘stupid’ (one more reason to love this girl!) . . . And Evander Holyfield, who once defeated George Foreman for the World heavyweight boxing title is now seeking to beat Foreman again by releasing the ‘Evander Holyfield Real Deal Grill’, a direct competitor to Foreman’s famous ‘Lean Mean Fat Reducing Grilling Machine’, which has grossed an estimated $100 million since 1995 (this showdown will no doubt be known as the ‘Thrilla of the Grillas’).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Amy Winehouse – A friend says her husband Blake Fielder-Civil abandoned her in the hospital after her alleged drug overdose in AUGUST while he left … to take more heroin. Dump him!
• Bob Dylan – A career-spanning, 3-CD retrospective of his career called simply “Dylan” is out TODAY. This definitive collection chronicles his 4 decades of studio recordings. TODAY Dylan’s “Joker Man” will be the 1st free song download offered by Starbucks’ new wireless iTunes music service (50 million free song downloads will be given away over the next month).
• Bruce Springsteen & the E Street Band – TONIGHT in Hartford CT, they launch a North American & European tour in support of TODAY’s release of “Magic”, their 1st studio album since 2002′s “The Rising”.
• Faith Hill – TODAY she does both “Good Morning America” (ABC) & “The View” (ABC/CTV) to promote her new album “The Hits”. The compilation features 10 #1 songs, as well as her new single “Red Umbrella”.
• Garth Brooks – He’s the first artist in music history to debut at #1 on the “Billboard” Country Singles chart, with “More Than a Memory”.
• James Blunt – His new single “1973” is #1 in Europe for the 2nd consecutive week, while his “All The Lost Souls” CD tops the album chart.
• The Police – France’s culture ministry has recognized their lifetime contribution to music by inducting them into the Order of Arts & Letters.
• Radiohead – They’ve announced they’ll release their long-awaited 7th album, “In Rainbows”, on their website beginning OCTOBER 11. And there won’t be a set price for the download … fans get to decide how much they want to pay.
• Rolling Stones – “The Very Best of Mick Jagger”compilation is released TODAY, featuring 3 previously unreleased songs, the most notable being 1973′s “Too Many Cooks (Spoil The Soup)”, which was produced by John Lennon.
• Spice Girls – The 3 London shows during their upcoming reunion tour have sold out in an amazing 38 seconds.
• Usher – He’s become the latest celeb to launch his own scent, a his & hers combo known as ‘Usher: He’ and ‘Usher: She’. Clothing is coming next, he says.
• Also released TODAY: “Hear Something Country Christmas”, a 14-track holiday CD set featuring tracks by Alan Jackson, Brad Paisley, Brooks & Dunn, Carrie Underwood, Kellie Pickler, Kenny Chesney, Martina McBride, Sara Evans, and Terri Clark among others.

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SCHED:
• “Carpoolers” (ABC) – Premiere of a new comedy about the life journey of 4 guys back & forth to work in the diamond lane. Stars Fred Goss, Faith Ford & Jerry O’Connell. Is commuting funny?
• “Cavemen” (ABC) – Premiere of a new sitcom based on characters from the popular series of Geico Insurance TV ads.  Bill English, Nick Kroll & Sam Huntington play San Diego-dwelling dudes with ‘tudes about their minority status in a post-caveman world.
• “Pushing Daisies (CTV) – Premiere of a new fantasy series about a joe-average guy (Lee Pace) who has an extraordinary talent: he can bring people back from the dead … but only for 60 seconds.
• Princess Diana – TODAY an official inquest into her & Dodi Fayed’s 1997 deaths is scheduled to commence at London’s Royal Courts of Justice, the result of a long lobby by Dodi’s father, Egyptian retail tycoon Mohamed Al-Fayed of Harrod’s fame.
• “Queer Eye” (Bravo) – TONIGHT the final season kicks off as the Fab Five’s groundbreaking makeover series concludes its 4-year run with 10 new episodes.

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “1408” ( Horror Thriller ): John Cusack stars as a writer renowned for debunking paranormal events who finds himself up against a force he can’t explain after checking into room #1408 of the notoriously haunted Dolphin Hotel in NYC. Co-stars Samuel L Jackson & Mary McCormack (“The West Wing”). An adaptation of an original Stephen King short story. Also available in a 2-disc ‘Collector’s Edition’.
• “Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer” ( Sci-Fi Fantasy ): Ioan Gruffudd, Jessica Alba, Chris Evans & Michael Chiklis return in this sequel to the 2005 film as the Marvel Comics superheroes face a new threat in the form of the ‘Silver Surfer’, a strange being who travels through space on a cosmic surfboard. Then they learn there’s an even bigger menace waiting for them … the planet-devouring ‘Galactus’. Shot in Montréal, Vancouver, Burnaby & Port Coquitlam BC. Also available in ‘The Power Cosmic Edition’.
• “The War: A Ken Burns Film” (Documentary): A highly-rated documentary that just aired on PBS-TV. The 7-part series focuses on the many ways the Second World War impacted lives.
• Also out TODAY: “Bram Stoker’s Dracula: Special Edition”; “Criminal Minds: The 2nd Season”; “Entourage: Season 3, Part 2”; “A Flintstones Christmas Carol”; “Funny Face: 50th Anniversary Edition”; and “Star Trek: The Next Generation – The Complete Series”.
    
MORE PIGS THAN PEOPLE:

Official estimates suggest there are now 23 million feral pigs in Australia, outnumbering the country’s human population by 2 million. They are the descendants of domestic pigs who apparently find the land Down Under to be hog heaven, with plentiful food, a balmy climate and no natural predators. (So now you know where to go to get a really cheap BLT.)
– “Daily Telegraph“

4 EYES = NO GUYS:
Recent research suggests that wearing contact lenses instead of eyeglasses increases a woman=s appeal to men by up to 400%. In a University of Warwick study, 85% of young women who switched to contact lenses reported increased self-confidence, while 75% of those who switched from contacts to regular eyewear complained of feeling less confident. Half of those who changed to contacts reported a definite increase in their ability to attract males. 80% of those switching to glasses felt less able to attract a mate. Psychology researcher Dr June McNicholas concludes men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses. (Unless they’re wearing glasses too … beer goggles.)
– “New Science”

NOW IT’S DAD’S FAULT:
Competitive fathers are taking over from ‘pushy’ mothers when it comes to demanding academic success from their children. According to a new Mintel poll, the average father now ranks his kids’ achievement at school as having higher priority than his own health. (Mom’s more worried over whether they’ll toss out the nutritious lunch she spent an hour making.)
– “GQ”

GETTING INTO A GOOD MOOD:
According to psychiatrist Dr Mark Goulston, there are 5 simple steps to getting yourself out of a bad mood …
• Don’t dwell on problems. Examining your troubles too closely will only compound your misery.
• Distract yourself from your troubles. Take a walk, go shopping, watch TV or read a book.
• Find something funny about your situation. Humor can defuse tension and boost your spirits. Joke and laugh about your bad mood and you’ll quickly begin to feel better.
• Seek compliments. When you’re in a bad mood, you need comfort and reassurance from others. Ask a spouse or friend to tell you how special you are.
• Analyze disputes. Figure out whether a distressing situation is really very serious, then calmly try to communicate with the other person to resolve it.
– “Psychology Today”

MEN ARE SMARTER … AND DUMBER TOO:
In new research study, scientists measured the IQ of 2,500 siblings and not only found a surplus of men in the top 2%, but also in the bottom 2%. The study’s participants were tested on science, maths, English, and mechanical abilities. Though there were twice as many men as women in the smartest group, there were also twice as many men among the dolts. The overall aggregate scores of men and women were similar.
– ANI Health & Science

CHINESE TRY TO LOOK MORE CAUCASIAN:
A new survey has found that Chinese women want to change the shape of their faces, while men want straighter noses. The poll of close to 1,600 adults aged 18-to-55 found about a third of women would like to improve the contours of their faces. Among men, nearly 45% of men say they’d like to straighten their noses to give them a ‘more masculine’ look. For both genders, double eyelid surgery is the 2nd-most-popular procedure. There are about 1 million cosmetic surgery operations performed every year in China, according to official estimates.
– “China Daily”

DID YOU KNOW?
According to food psychologists at Cornell University, people are more likely to seek out so-called ‘comfort foods’ when they’re happy.
– “Toronto Star”

BS CHRONOMETER 10.02.07

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1948 [59] Donna Karan (Faske), Forest Hills NY, fashion designer (DKNY line of clothing)

1951 [56] Sting (Gordon Sumner), Newcastle Upon Tyne UK, rock musician (“Brand New Day”, Police-“Every Breath You Take”)/founded the ‘Rainforest Foundation’ in 1989

1954 [53] Lorraine Bracco, Brooklyn NY, TV actress (‘Dr Jennifer Melfi’, the shrink on “The Sopranos” 1999-2007)/ex-Mrs Edward James Olmos, ex-Mrs Harvey Keitel

1970 [37] Kelly Ripa, Stratford NJ, TV talk show co-host (“Live With Regis & Kelly” since 2001)/TV actress (“Hope & Faith” 2003-06, “All My Children” 1990-2002)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Custodial Workers Day”, honoring those who clean up after the rest of us. Nicer names for ‘Janitor’ … ‘Caretaker’, ‘Maintenance Coordinator’, ‘Sanitation Engineer’, ‘Cleanliness Resource Supervisor’.

• “Name Your Car Day”. Polls show that about 15% of people have a pet name for their vehicle. What’s the best-named car model? Diablo? Lamborghini? Cayenne? Hummer?

• “Old Man’s Day” in Braughing, England, commemorating a 16th-century funeral in which pallbearers dropped a coffin bearing an old man. The jolt woke him up and saved him from being buried alive. Villagers have commemorated the event ever since with a procession to the cemetery.

• “World Farm Animals Day”, as declared by the ‘Farm Animal Reform Movement’, to memorialize the ‘needless suffering and death’ of billions of innocent farm animals each year. The date honors the birthday of Mahatma Gandhi, who was the world’s foremost champion of humane farming.
BS KNOW YOUR FARM ANIMAL QUIZ:
• What do you get when you cross a male horse and a female donkey? [A 'hinny'. When a female horse and male donkey mate, the offspring is called a ‘mule’.]
• How many eggs does a chicken lay in a year? [An average hen will lay 300.]
• This animal’s heart is capable of pumping 200 liters of blood per minute – enough to fill the gas tank of a pickup truck 3 times faster than a gas pump. [Horse.]
• How many piglets does an average sow raise at one time? [8-to-12.]
• Why do farmers wear the same colored clothing each time they enter the poultry barn? [So they don’t frighten the birds.]
Source: Ontario Farm Animal Council

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1950 [57] Charles Schultz’s comic strip “Peanuts” (originally titled “Li’l Folks”) debuts in 9 newspapers, introducing the characters ‘Charlie Brown’, ‘Snoopy’, ‘Patty’ & ‘Sherman’ (even though Schultz is dead, “Peanuts Classics” are still published in over 2000 newspapers)

1995 [12] OJ Simpson jurors reach ‘not guilty’ verdict in his double murder case in less than 4 hours

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1995 [12] Alanis Morissette’s “Jagged Little Pill” reaches #1 on album charts

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1961 [46] 1st ‘Pre-Moistened Hand Towel’ is introduced (what did moms do before ‘wipes’?)

1991 [16] 1st team in sports history to draw 4 million fans in a single season (Toronto Blue Jays, who also clinch AL East on this day)

1994 [13] 1st-ever NFL coach clash of father vs son as Miami Dolphins’ Don Shula defeats son and Cincinnati Bengal coach David by a score of 23-7

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1997 [10] ‘World’s Shortest Man’, 22-inch-tall Gul Mohammed, dies at age 36 in New Delhi, India without achieving his dream of marrying a tall woman (like maybe a strapping 3-footer)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] “Little Mosque on the Prairie” season debut (CBC)
[Thurs] International Bluegrass Music Awards (Nashville)
[Thurs] Toot Your Flute Day
[Fri] Techies Day
[Fri] World Teachers Day
This Week Is … Pickled Pepper Week (an invention of Peter Piper?)
This Month Is … Dryer Vent Safety Month (yeah, never put your tongue in there)

BULL’S BITS

BS RANDOM JOKE:
“Won’t you kiss me, doctor?” asks a female patient. “No, it would be against my code of ethics,” the doc says. “Please just one?” begs the woman. “Out of the question,” he says. “I shouldn’t even really be having sex with you.”

TRUTH OR BS?
• There is seaweed in toothpaste. (TRUTH. A purple, edible seaweed called Carrageenan, or Irish Moss, is a common ingredient in toothpaste … and in ice cream!)
• 50% of all forms of life that have existed on Earth are now extinct. (BS. It’s closer to 95%.)
• Canada’s coastline is 6 times longer than Australia’s. (TRUTH)
• The sound of a snore can be almost as loud as a pneumatic drill. (TRUTH. Snore: Up to 69 decibels. Jackhammer: 70-90 decibels.)
• After the USA, Canada has the world’s greatest number of tornadoes. (BS. Australia has a few hundred a year, a distant 2nd to the US which experiences about 1,000 annually.)
• About a third of all home buyers are now single women. (TRUTH. Recent stats show close to a third of home buyers are now single, unmarried women.)
• It takes the human eye an hour to adapt completely to seeing in the dark. (TRUTH)
• Only first-generation offspring of Holstein cows have the same pattern of spots. (BS. No two are the same.)
• Shrimps’ hearts are actually in their heads. (TRUTH)

BS PHONE STARTER:
You’ve just won $100,000 … but have to give it all away. No friends or family allowed. So what do you do with it?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: Scientifically speaking your ability to do THIS is diminished when you are lying down.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Smell.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
We may be alone. We may not be alone. Either way, the thought is staggering.


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