Wednesday, October 19, 2016 – Edition: #5832

Tomorrow’s Show Prep Today!

★ Tonight Alicia Keys thanks her mentor Clive Davis by presenting him a ‘Humanitarian Award’ at her annual “Black Ball”. The 84-year-old music mogul, who discovered the singer and helped launch her career 15 years ago, is this year’s guest of honor at Alicia’s 13th annual fundraiser at NYC’s Hammerstein Ballroom. A$AP Rocky, Chance the Rapper, Patti Smith, and Salt-n-Pepa are performing at the black-tie event, which is streaming live on Tidal. Proceeds benefit Keys’ charity, Keep a Child Alive.
★ Defiant Azealia Banks is refusing to back down following her spat with Russell Crowe at a party on Saturday, and promises “the truth” will be revealed today. Banks has filed a police report, accusing the actor of spitting on her, calling her the ‘N-word’, and kicking her out of a party she attended with Wu-Tang Clan’s RZA. But some sources say Banks was the aggressor and Crowe only took action when she allegedly became abusive towards him and another female guest. Banks quote: “This is the most expensive mistake he will ever make in his life.”
★ Jennifer Lawrence is said to be ‘secretly’ dating director Darren Aronofsky (“Black Swan”). The 26-year-old actress and 47-year-old director have been spotted on a string of low-key dates in LA recently. They reportedly struck up a romance after working together on a yet-to-be-titled new film that also stars Javier Bardem and Michelle Pfeiffer. This would be J-Law’s first known relationship since splitting from Coldplay’s Chris Martin last year. Aronofsky was engaged to actress Rachel Weisz for 5 years before they split in 2010.
– “The Sun”
★ And Jennifer Lopez has reportedly called it quits with longtime boyfriend Casper Smart because he cheated after promising he would never do it again. The singer-actress apparently ended her relationship with the backup dancer for good in August, after almost 5 years together, because he’d cheated twice while they were dating and Lopez decided enough was enough. The couple split for the first time in 2014 but reconciled last year. J-Lo says Smart is still “a good friend”.

• “Ellen” (syndicated/CTV2) – Maren Morris (“Hero”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Saves the Day (“Saves the Day”).
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/CTV) – Weezer (“Weezer”).
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Stanton Moore (“Conversations”). Rerun.
• “Live With Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – Guest co-host Ciara (“Jackie”).
• “Presidential Debate” (ABC/CBS/FOX/NBC/PBS): FOX News anchor Chris Wallace moderates (referees?) from the University of Nevada in Las Vegas.
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Metallica (“Hardwired …To Self-Destruct”). Rerun.
• “Wendy Williams” (syndicated) – Christina Milian (“4U”).

• ABBA – They may be back … at least in virtual 3-D form. Former Spice Girls manager Simon Fuller is said to be in talks about a hologram-based touring stage show. The technology has already been used for shows featuring Elvis Presley, Frank Sinatra, and Michael Jackson.
• Green Day – “Revolution Radio” has given the veteran punk trio their 3rd-ever #1 album on the ‘Billboard 200’ chart. In 2009, “21st Century Breakdown” debuted at #1, and “American Idiot” spent 3 weeks in top spot in 2004-05.
• The Chainsmokers – “Closer” has scored a 9th week at #1 on the ‘Billboard Hot 100’ chart, tying Outkast’s 2003 hit “Hey Ya!”. Only Los del Río has spent longer at the top, with 1996’s “Macarena”.
• Justin Bieber – The 22-year-old, currently on tour in England, is said to be spending $132,000-a-month to rent a 15-bedroom mansion in an exclusive area of North London. Word has it he’s fallen in love with the UK, so he’s planning to split time between the property and his LA home.
• Lady Gaga – The 30-year-old, known for her outlandish costumes, says she’s decided to drop the gimmicks with the release of her new album “Joanne” (out Friday). She figures if she dons ”black pants and a black T-shirt” people will focus more on her music and lyrics.
• Mumford & Sons – Ben Lovett wants to reverse London’s declining nightlife scene with his new music venue Omeara. The UK capital has seen a number of iconic nightspots close over the past decade, including legendary cabaret Madame Jojo’s and the Fabric nightclub.

It’s not unusual to see people in odd positions in fitness classes at the gym … the birthing squat, downward dog, seal, and happy baby are all strange-looking moves with real benefits. But crawling like a baby? For an extended period of time? It’s now a thing, and proponents say that practicing the movement patterns of toddlers can enable us to ‘press reset’ and reclaim the strength and mobility we’ve lost over time. The basic premise is that babies make use of all four limbs when figuring out how to walk, which is a healthy thing, but we upright humans soon forget that and often wind up in pain. (Seems ‘crawling’ is the new ‘plank’.)
– “Shape Magazine”

A statistical look at who we are and the things we do …
• 75% of school kids have lied about homework at least once.
• 40% of us admit to drinking right out of the milk (juice) carton when no one else is around.
• 33% us say we suffer a ‘wedgie’ on an almost-daily basis.
• 25% of under 35s say not agreeing on TV shows is a deal-breaker in a relationship.
• 20% of us have a room that we’re not using because it’s full of clutter or junk.
• 5% of us have attempted to cook french fries … on the grill.

Chanel designer Karl Lagerfeld’s special-edition colored pencil set is SRO. Now there’s a waiting list in the shop at NYC’s Museum of Modern Art for the ‘Karlbox’, a collection of pencils, markers, paintbrushes, and other artsy doodads. But the breathtaking part is the $3,000 price tag (sharpeners included). Some 2,500 of the limited-edition sets made by Faber-Castell sold out shortly after going on sale online last month. The set comes in an elegant black wood box said to resemble a Chinese wedding cabinet. Although the collection is tagged ‘Colors in Black’, the tools come in every color of the rainbow. (Seriously, can pencils costing roughly $9 each possibly be worth it?)

Cutting-edge vocab …
• ‘Chatbot’ – A software program that uses artificial intelligence to mimic conversation with the user.
• ‘Miniac’ – A person who is enthusiastic about making or collecting miniatures.
• ‘Trumpocalypse’ – What some fear would be the result of Donald Trump becoming US president.

Close-protection security consultants work on the principle that a client should never be more than 8 seconds away from rescue.
– “The Guardian”


1945 [71] John Lithgow, Rochester NY, movie actor (“The Accountant”, “Interstellar”)/TV actor (“Dexter” 2009, “3rd Rock From the Sun” 1996-2001)

1969 [47] Trey Parker, Conifer CO, TV producer-writer (“South Park” since 1997)

1977 [39] Jason Reitman, Montréal QC, film director (“Up In the Air”, “Juno”)/movie producer (“Whiplash”)

1986 [30] Zac Barnett, Boston MA, indie rock singer (American Authors-“Best Day of My Life”, “Believer”)

• “Day of National Concern About Young People & Gun Violence”, when students are asked to voluntarily sign a ‘Pledge Against Gun Violence’.

• “Dress Like a Dork Day”, when all you need to do is slick back your hair, get out the plaid polyester pants, hideous shirt, suspenders, white knee socks, and your favorite dickey. Add horn-rimmed glasses fixed with masking tape, a fanny pack, and you’re good to go!

• “Evaluate Your Life Day”, a time to ‘sit back and reflect on your contribution to humanity and see if you’re really heading toward where you want to be’. Hey, it shouldn’t take long.

• “Greasy Spoon Day”, a time to remember your favorite place to eat back in the ‘good old days’. Is it still in business? Wanna go?

• “Seafood Bisque Day”, celebrating the smooth, creamy, and highly-seasoned soup of French origin. Based on a strained broth of crustaceans, it’s made with lobster, crab, or shrimp.

2003 [13] Magician David Blaine emerges from 44 days of isolation in a clear plastic box suspended over the Thames in London UK

2012 [03] Justin Timberlake weds Jessica Biel at a super-secret ceremony in Italy

1986 [30] Cyndi Lauper’s “True Colors” hits #1 (goes on to become an anthem of acceptance and is reinterpreted many times)

2010 [06] In an interview with “Radio Times” magazine, Elton John describes today’s songwriters as “pretty awful”, pop music as “uninspiring”, and TV talent shows as “boring”

2011 [05] Coldplay releases a 5th studio album, “Mylo Xyloto”, which debuts at #1 in 34 countries

2010 [06] 1st Muslim mayor of a large North American city, as Naheed Nenshi is elected in Calgary, Alberta (re-elected in 2013 with 74% of the vote)

2006 [10] Dow Jones Average closes above 12,000 for the 1st time (today it’s circa 18,000)

[Thurs] “The Rocky Horror Picture Show: Let’s Do The Time Warp Again” (FOX)
[Thurs] Suspenders Day
[Fri] “Jack Reacher: Never Go Back”; “Ouija: Origin of Evil” open in movie theaters
[Sat] Smart is Cool Day
[Sun] Mark Twain Prize for American Humor (Washington DC)
This Week Is … School Bus Safety Week
This Month Is … Physical Therapy Month


• “A room without books is like … my apartment.”
• “Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% … what happens to characters on TV shows.”
• “The great thing in this world is not so much where you stand as … where you lie down to take a nap.”
• “Education costs money, but then so does … boxed wine. I know which one I’d prefer.”
• “If not us, who? If not now … maybe after this next episode?”
• “Don’t worry about failures. Worry about … the growing pile of bills on your kitchen counter.”
• “It doesn’t matter who you are or what you look like, so long as somebody … delivers pizza to you.”
• “You may be disappointed if you fail, but … at this point you’re probably used to it.”
• “A journey of a thousand miles … costs way too much gas money.”
• Many of life’s failures are experienced by … me.”
– Thanks to RK Pendergrass

I found a great way to lose weight. I put the scales in front of the fridge.

More than half of men no longer know how to tie which?
a. A ‘Granny Knot’.
b. A necktie. [CORRECT]
c. Their shoes.

☎ Whether it be entertainment, politics, or sports, who is your most-liked celebrity? Why?

Question: People who have one of THESE are less likely to cheat on their significant others.
Answer: A dog.

You don’t have to swim faster than the shark, just faster than the guy next to you.

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