Wednesday, October 28, 2015        Edition: #5359

Sheet for Brains!

★ The Hollywood Press Association has announced that 54-year-old Brit comedian Ricky Gervais is set to host the Golden Globe Awards for a 4th time. Gervais also confirmed his involvement on Twitter and alluded to his divisive hosting style, quote: “My only guarantee is that not everyone will enjoy it as much as me.” He previously hosted 2010-12 was criticized by TV commentators and audiences alike for his acerbic style and he vowed at the time to never host again. Gervais takes over from Tina Fey & Amy Poehler, who’ve hosted the past 3 years. The Golden Globes are scheduled for the Beverly Hills Hilton on January 10th.
★ A 1939 “Tintin” comic strip has sold at auction for 1.6 million euros ($1.8 million) in Paris, France, thereby smashing the record for cartoon memorabilia. Belgian cartoonist Herge’s double-page strip from “Tintin, King Ottokar’s Sceptre” fetched almost double the pre-auction estimate. The strip, which was published in “Le Petit Vingtieme” in 1939 and chronicles a plane crash featuring the boy detective and his dog ‘Snowy’, was part of cartoon afficionado Jean-Arnold Schoofs’ collection.
★ And former “Daily Show” host Jon Stewart is opening an animal sanctuary in New Jersey. He & wife Tracey have launched Bufflehead Farm for mistreated animals. The sanctuary currently houses 4 pigs and a flock of sheep is on the way. It’s hoped the farm will attract tours from school groups. The Stewarts are well-known animal advocates who have a longstanding relationship with the group Farm Sanctuary. In fact, Tracey has a book about animals coming out in the Fall, entitled “Do Unto Animals: A Friendly Guide to How Animals Live, and How We Can Make Their Lives Better”.

• “Hockey Wives” (W) – The Season 2 debut adds the likes of Keshia Chante (girlfriend of Ray Emery, ex-Chicago Blackhawks) and Angela Price (wife of Carey Price, Montréal Canadiens).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Brett Eldredge (“Illinois”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Shlohmo (“Dark Red”).
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/M3) – Josh Groban (“Stages”).
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Alabama Shakes (“Sound & Color”).
• “Live With Kelly & Michael” (syndicated/CTV) – Andrea Bocelli (“Pasión”).
• “The Real” (syndicated) – Smokey Robinson (“Smokey & Friends”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Rod Stewart (“Another Country”).
• “World Series” (FOX) – Kansas City Royals host New York Mets in Game 2.

• Adele – She’s booked to tape a low-key fan-only show at NYC’s Radio City Music Hall on November 17th. The TV special  will air the following week. She’ll also perform on NBC-TV’s “Saturday Night Live” on November 21st. Her new single “Hello” looks set to debut at #1 in both the US and UK.
• Beyoncé – She’s joining actor Channing Tatum when he lip syncs along to her hit “Run the World (Girls)” during an upcoming episode of the Spike-TV show “Lip Sync Battle”. The “Magic Mike” star will compete against his wife, Jenna Dewan Tatum.
• Ciara – Her NFL QB-boyfriend Russell Wilson (Seattle Seahawks) has thrown her a surprise 30th birthday party with a superhero theme. Ciara as ‘Cat Woman’ and Wilson (as ‘Batman’) arrived at the bash in the ‘Batmobile’ from “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice”.
• Demi Lovato / Nick Jonas – They’re co-headlining the 44-date “Future Now: The Tour” next year. The joint trek begins in Sunrise, Florida on June 24th. Demi was a supporting act on the Jonas Bros’ 2009 tour.
• Janet Jackson – She has been ordered to rest her voice a bit longer by her doctors and has postponed 2 more dates. Currently she is slated to resume her (ironically named) “Unbreakable” tour this Friday night in Omaha, Nebraska.
• Kacey Musgraves– She’s become the only country act to headline at NYC’s famed Apollo Theater. Her weekend “Country & Western Rhinestone Revue” show was SRO.
• Kenny Chesney – He’ll “Spread the Love” next year with a stadium tour. The first show is April 23rd in Auburn, Alabama. Miranda Lambert, Sam Hunt, and Old Dominion will play most of the shows.
• Pentatonix – They’ve scored their 1st #1 album as the a capella group’s self-titled new release has debuted atop the new ‘Billboard 200’.
• The Weeknd – He’s notched up a 6th week atop the ‘Billboard Hot 100’ singles list with “The Hills”. Meantime, he’s just pleaded no contest to punching a Las Vegas police officer in a hotel scuffle in January. Court records show a judge has agreed to dismiss the charge if he stays out of trouble, completes 50 hours of community service, attends impulse control counseling and alcohol evaluation, and pays $1,000 to a injured police officers fund.

Celebrity manicurist Deborah Lippmann has created a limited edition gift box of 3 nail polishes inspired by songs from the FOX-TV hit “Empire”. After all, the women on “Empire” are always turned out, especially star Taraji P Henson, who plays ‘Cookie’. Even when she brandishes a gun, her manicure is perfect. The new polishes are said to be ideal colors for Winter, including “Hustle Hard” (a fuchsia shimmer); “Power Of the Empire” (a gold record glitter); and “War of the Roses” (a ruby red shimmer). The set goes on sale for $24 in November and will be available at and (They missed ‘Envy Green’ and ‘Powerful Platinum’.)
– “New York Daily News”

A statistical look at who we are and the things we do …
• 74% of us will hand out candy to trick-or-treaters Saturday night.
• 47% of married men say watching ‘chick flicks’ is their least favorite thing to do.
• 44% of us plan to don a costume this Halloween.
• 35% of drivers admit they talk to their vehicles every day.
• 16% of us have gotten a finger stuck in a mousetrap at least once.
• 12% of pet owners are planning to dress up their pets for Halloween.

Cutting-edge vocab …
• ‘Defeature’ – To return a product to its original or most basic purpose by removing features that do not contribute or apply to that purpose. For instance, Swiss tech company Punkt has developed a ‘dumbphone’ that makes calls and accepts voicemail. That’s it.
• ‘Juice Jacking’ – Stealing data from a portable device that is plugged into a hacked public charging station. Is this a problem? Tech firm Crowd Supply claims it could be so its sells a product that acts as a ‘protective barrier between your device and juice-jacking hackers’.
• ‘Selfeet’ – A self-shot photo of one’s shoes or bare feet. It’s hard to imagine that the selfie could stoop any lower but this has apparently become a thing after the idea was introduced by an online shoe sales site.

Estimates of expected expenditures on Halloween 2015 …
Average amount spent on Halloween … $93.42
Average amount spent on a Halloween costume … $31.52
Average amount spent on candy … $27.05
Average spent on Halloween decorations … $24.79
– National Retail Federation

Most Popular Adult Costumes …
1. Witch
2. Pirate
3. Vampire
4. Batman
Most Popular Child Costumes …
1. Princess
2. Superhero
3. Fairy
4. Vampire

Eating a Mediterranean diet may slow the aging process by 5 years.
– “The Guardian”


1955 [60] Bill (William Henry III) Gates, Seattle WA, retired Microsoft mogul/estimated wealth $79.4 billion as of October 2015/philanthropist (Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation)

1963 [52] Sheryl Underwood, Little Rock AR, TV talk show panelist (“The Talk” since 2011)/standup comedian

1966 [49] Andy Richter, Grand Rapids MI, TV sidekick (“Conan” since 2010, “Tonight Show With Conan O’Brien” 2009, “Late Night With Conan O’Brien” 1993-2000)

1967 [48] Julia Roberts, Smyrna GA, movie star (“Eat Pray Love”, “Erin Brockovich”)/mom to twins Hazel & Phinneaus

1969 [46] Ben Harper, Claremont CA, pop singer-guitarist (“Steal My Kisses”, “Diamonds On the Inside”)

1972 [43] Brad Paisley, Glen Dale WV, country singer (“Perfect Storm”, w/Carrie Underwood-“Remind Me”)/19 #1 country hits

1974 [41] Joaquin Phoenix, San Juan PR, movie actor (“Reservation Road”, “Walk the Line”)

1979 [36] Dave Tirio, Villa Park IL, pop-rock guitarist (Plain White T’s-“1,2,3,4”, “Hey There Delilah”)

1987 [28] Frank Ocean, Long Beach CA, rapper/pop singer-songwriter (“Lost”, “Thinkin Bout You”)

1998 [17] Nolan Gould, Columbus GA, TV actor (‘Luke Dunphy’ on “Modern Family” since 2009)

• “Bring Your Jack-o-Lantern to Work Day”, a day to show the boss what a punkin’ head you really are!

• “International Animation Day”, first proclaimed in 2002 to celebrate the art of animation.

• “Plush Animal Lover’s Day”, a day to celebrate your stuffed animal collection. ‘Plush’ sounds so much more humane, no? (Ask listeners what animals they’ve saved from their childhood.)

• “World Escoffier Day”, the 169th anniversary of the 1846 birth of Auguste Escoffier, ‘father of modern French cuisine’.

2009 [06] The Michael Jackson concert rehearsal documentary “This Is It” opens in movie theaters around-the-globe

2013 [02] Michael Jackson’s personal physician Dr Conrad Murray is released from prison, 2 years after being convicted of involuntary manslaughter

2007 [08] 1st time an NFL regular-season contest is played outside North America, as NY Giants defeat Miami Dolphins 13-10 at London’s Wembley Stadium

[Thurs] Cat Day
[Thurs] World Psoriasis Day
[Fri] Voodoo Music & Arts Experience begins (New Orleans LA)
[Fri] Create a Great Funeral Day
[Fri] Frankenstein Friday
[Sat] Magic Day
[Sun] Daylight Saving Time ends
This Week Is … Disarmament Week
This Month Is … Celiac Disease Awareness Month


• Hooray! An extra hour in bed! Bed! Bed! Bed! I’m going to put on new sheets. Maybe get a new blanket. God I love sleep. I’m definitely going to go to bed at the ‘same’ time.
• I’m not sure my mom’s reminded me enough about the clocks. She only texted twice, emailed, and rang me this morning.
• Why am I so hungry? Seriously, it’s only 7 am and I could chew that guy’s arm off to get his bacon sandwich.
• No, really, why am I so hungry? It’s only 11 am and I’ve already eaten my lunch and been to the bakery for a danish.
• Why do we even change the clocks in the first place? It’s something to do with farmers, isn’t it?
• Is my phone showing the right time? It should auto-update, shouldn’t it?
• It’s so dark out. I need a flashlight just to find my front door.
• Why am I so tired? This is basically jet lag. Standard time jet lag.
• Oh good, I haven’t missed “Jane the Virgin”. Oh wait, I have missed it! Stupid microwave clock.
• I’ll just go to bed now. Seems like a good idea.
• How is it 1 am? And I’m wide awake again!
– Adapted from “Metro”

☎ What’s the most annoying thing your partner does immediately after ‘intimacy’?

• The “Flower Meanings” website tells you what message is conveyed by sending various types of flowers. For instance, if you’re jealous you should send yellow hyacinths. If you wanna say ‘You’re Great in the Sack’, pick tulips.
• The online “Rap Dictionary” has an alphabetized list of hundreds of rap terms and what they mean. Use it to translate mystifying lyrics or to create a ‘rap riddle’ which listeners attempt to solve to win a prize. Did you know ‘Be Geese’ means ‘to leave’?

Which are which?
• Nasalis [Muscle]
• Mentalis [Muscle]
• Xeryus [Cologne]
• Agua Brava [Cologne]
• Levator Labii [Muscle]
• Drakar Noir [Cologne]
• Risorius [Muscle]
• Aramis [Cologne]
• Zygomaticus [Muscle]
• Orbicularis Oculi [Muscle]
• Joop [Cologne]
– Thanks to Mike Henry

For Halloween I’m going as a nudist on strike. All I need is my regular clothes and a picket sign.

Question: Doing THIS improves men’s health but does not have any effect on women’s health.
Answer: Getting married.

Never trust a skinny cook.

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