Thursday, October 3, 2013        Edition: #5072

Ah, the Sweet Smell of BS!

★ 52-year-old Hollywood star George Clooney is reportedly dating Croatian model Monika Jakisic (33) after swapping phone numbers with her at Loulou’s nightclub in London this May. He actually first met the stunning swimwear model in 2004, and now that he’s single after splitting with Stacy Keibler, he’s reconnected with her. Word has it she’s even stayed overnight at his mansion. Meanwhile, long-legged former WWE wrestler Stacy has also moved on; on Monday she was spotted drinking wine in Paris with tech entrepreneur Jared Pobre. (Clooney to Pobre … a bit of a step down, no?)
– “Us Weekly”
★ In a new interview, Mia Farrow has fueled long-running rumors she has a child via Frank Sinatra by confessing the late singer (1998) could ‘possibly’ be the father of her 25-year-old son Ronan. The 68-year-old actress was married to the legendary crooner for 2 years beginning in 1966 but they allegedly remained occasional lovers for years afterwards. Gossip mongers have long speculated that Ronan was sired by Sinatra not moviemaker Woody Allen, whom Farrow was married to at the time. (One clue: The kid has blue eyes, reminiscent of Sinatra’s album “Ol’ Blue Eyes is Back”.)
– “Vanity Fair”
★ 33-year-old actor Channing Tatum has thrown himself into fatherhood since welcoming Everly into the world 4 months ago with his wife Jenna Dewan-Tatum. One of his parenting techniques is to soothe his daughter when she’s crying by … beatboxing. And it works! Needless to say this is much to the annoyance of his wife, who has no success using more traditional methods like rocking, humming, swaying, etc. (What’s your secret to getting a baby to stop crying?)
★ And here we go again! Angelina Jolie has sparked fresh wedding gossip after sporting a new band on her ring finger. She was spotted with the new jewelry during a beach day with her kids in Sydney, Australia, prompting bloggers to suggest the actress and longtime partner Brad Pitt may have wed in secret. (Do we really care? They’ve been living together and parenting an entire herd of munchkins for 8 years!)
– Bang Showbiz

• “Arsenio Hall” (syndicated) – Billy Ray Cyrus (“Change My Mind”).
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Jennifer Lopez, Keith Urban, Ryan Seacrest, Harry Connick Jr (“American Idol”); Travis (“Where You Stand”).
• “Glee” (FOX/Global) – Demi Lovato guest stars in the first of at least 6 episodes in tonight’s 2nd part of the show’s Beatles tribute.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – John Mayer (“Paradise Valley”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – The Coup (“Sorry to Bother You”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Phantogram (“Voices”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – A performance from the film “Muscle Shoals”.
• “Live With Kelly & Michael” (ABC/CTV) – 50 Cent (“The Massacre”).
• “The Originals” (CW/CHCH) – Debut of a spinoff from “The Vampire Diaries” (immediately following the “VD” season premiere), with original vamp siblings ‘Klaus’ (Joseph Morgan), ‘Elijah’ (Daniel Gillies), and ‘Rebekah’ (Claire Holt) moving to New Orleans.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Stone Temple Pilots w/Chester Bennington (“High Rise”).
• “Wendy Williams” (syndicated) – Nick Carter (Backstreet Boys).
• “The X Factor” (FOX/CTV2) – More hopefuls perform for the judges.

• Avenged Sevenfold – Tonight their “Hail To the King” tour begins in Chicago IL, the band’s first full-scale North American tour since 2011. Opening acts are Deftones and Ghost BC.
• The Band Perry – Lead singer Kimberley Perry has become engaged to Toronto Blue Jays catcher JC Arencibia. They first met backstage in 2012 after a concert in Plant City FL and began dating soon after.
• Brett Eldredge – Tonight in Oxford OH the “Don’t Ya” singer commences his first-ever headlining club tour. The “Bring You Back Fall 2013 Tour” will make 20 stops across America.
• Drake – Toronto’s favorite son has been hired by the NBA’s Toronto Raptors as a ‘Global Ambassador’. Drizzy is slated to help boost the team’s profile by redesigning its image and logo as well as launching a clothing line in collaboration with the team.
• Fiona Apple / Blake Mills – Tonight they embark on a 12-date North American tour. “Anything We Want: An Evening With Fiona Apple & Blake Mills” begins in Portland OR.
• Florida Georgia Line – After 4X Platinum “Cruise” topped charts all Summer, they begin their first headlining tour today in Brookings SD and continue through mid-December in Washington DC. Supporting acts are Colt Ford, Dallas Smith, and Tyler Farr.
• Jay Z – He tells the November edition of “Vanity Fair” he used to sell crack in Brooklyn, but says he knew dealing would only be a short-term gig. Quote: “You’re going to get locked up or you’re going to die.” His estimated net worth is now about $475 million.
• Luke Bryan – “Crash My Party” has been certified Platinum by the RIAA just 6 weeks after its release. The album debuted at #1 on both the ‘Billboard 200′ and ‘Country Albums’ charts.

A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “The Great Maple Syrup Caper” – Jason Segel is being courted to star in this maple syrup heist film based on a true occurrence. In 2011-12 the contents of approximately 16,000 barrels of maple syrup – worth an estimated $18 million – were siphoned off and stolen from a Québec warehouse. The film is planned to be a comedy with ‘dramatic overtones’.
• “Life” – Robert Pattinson has been cast as “Life” magazine photographer Dennis Stock, a close friend of James Dean, in this biopic about the legendary actor’s relationship with the press during the run-up to his 1955 film “East of Eden”. Rugged rebel Dean will be played by 27-year-old “Chronicle” star Dane DeHaan.
• “Like Sunday, Like Rain” – Green Day frontman Billie Joe Armstrong is taking to the bigscreen for his first starring role, opposite former “Gossip Girl” actress Leighton Meester in this indie film. He’s playing the boyfriend of Meester’s character, a struggling musician who becomes the guardian of a 12-year-old musical prodigy. Production is already underway in NYC.
• “Somnia” – “Riddick” actress Katee Sackhoff has joined the cast of Mike Flanagan’s upcoming horror movie which explores the thoughts of an orphaned child whose dreams and nightmares physically torture him while he lays asleep. It is not yet known what character the 33-year-old actress will play, but shooting is scheduled to kick off this Autumn.
• “Unbroken” – Angelina Jolie has been in Sydney, Australia scouting locations for her 2nd directorial project, a WW2 drama based on the true story of Louis Zamperini, an Olympic runner-turned-bombardier who spent 2 years as a POW after being shot down in the Pacific. “Skins” actor Jack O’Connell will star. The flick’s scheduled for release December 25, 2014.

There’s a new Tokyo apartment building that caters to wine lovers. The aptly named ‘Wine Apartment’ in the posh Shibuya district has a climate-controlled, in-house wine cellar in its basement for 10,000 bottles and a sommelier to offer advice on wine-food pairings. Residents can also borrow from a collection of 100 types of classy glasses on display in the lobby. Each of the building’s 18 apartments comes with a wine fridge for 26 bottles and a rack for wineglasses. Next month a bistro opens on the 1st floor, where residents can drink their own bottles … for a 2,000-yen ($20) corkage charge. (While hanging with their pretentious neighbors.)

New research shows students’ heavy reliance on texting is linked to sleep problems, lower levels of well-being, and burnout. Researchers at Washington & Lee University in Virginia say the problem mostly affects ‘heavy texters’, those who text at least 100 times a day. 70% of college students get less than 8 hours of sleep a night; 40% admit they feel rested only 2 days a week. Researchers think the link between sleep-loss and texting may be because students feel compelled to answer messages at all hours, even when their phones wake them in the middle of the night. (Simple solution. It’s called ‘OFF’.)

Being hunched over smartphones and tablets for most of the day is leaving young adults with more back pain than their elders. According to one survey, 84% of 18-to-24-year-olds have experienced back pain in the past year, and much of it is being blamed on slouching over screens without paying attention to posture. The symptoms of what’s being called ‘iPosture’ are slumping shoulders, a slouching middle, and a lower back that’s constantly compressed from sitting. The study shows young adults average 8.83 hours in front of their digital devices per day. (What about ‘OFF’ didn’t you understand?)
– “Daily Mail”

The new UN-sponsored ‘Global AgeWatch Index’ examines the quality of life of the elderly in 91 nations, based on income, health, education, environment, and other factors. The top 10 …
10. Japan
9. Iceland
8. USA
7. New Zealand
6. Switzerland
5. Canada
4. The Netherlands
3. Germany
2. Norway
1. Sweden.
Afghanistan ranks last. By 2050, older people will outnumber under-15s for the first time. (Power to the Cotton-heads!)

• Firefighters were called to what was believed to be smoke from a raging fire in Lincolnshire UK recently. But what was thought to be the sure sign of a roaring blaze turned out to be nothing more than … a cloud.
– “Stamford Mercury”
• Two Danish men want to launch the first amateur rocket to carry a human into space. The do-it-yourself project was made using steel and polyurethane, as well as cork and duct tape. The engineers have also made a spacesuit from … valves & pipes from a local hardware store.
– “Edmonton Journal”
• A pair who met on a dating site and arranged to meet for drinks at a swank bar in London’s Leicester Square didn’t get along so well. In fact, the man is facing criminal charges for stealing the woman’s cellphone after she refused to … split the bar tab. Think there’ll be a 2nd date?
– “Daily Telegraph”

• Tigers share 96% of their genes with the domestic cat.
– BBC News
• Smaller animals perceive time as if it is passing in slow motion.
– Magazine Monitor
• There’s a polar bear jail in Churchill, Manitoba … an old aircraft hangar containing 28 cells for bears who wander into town.
– “Times of London”


1962 [51] Tommy Lee (Bass), Athens, Greece, rock drummer (Motley Crue-“If I Die Tomorrow”)/ex-Mr Pam Anderson (1995-98)/ex-Mr Heather Locklear (1986-93)

1964 [49] Clive Owen, Coventry UK, movie actor (“Killer Elite”, “Closer”)  UP NEXT: “Sin City: A Dame to Kill For” (2014).

1969 [44] Gwen Stefani, Anaheim CA, pop singer (No Doubt-“Settle Down”, “It’s My Life”)/fashion designer-marketer (LAMB)/movie actress (“The Aviator”, “Zoolander”)/Mrs Gavin Rossdale since 2002

1971 [42] Kevin Richardson, Lexington KY, boy-band pop singer (Backstreet Boys-“Incomplete”, “I Want It That Way”)

1973 [40] Neve Campbell, Guelph ON, movie actress (“Scream” movies, “Wild Things”)/TV actress (“Titanic: Blood & Steel”)

1976 [37] Seann William Scott, Cottage Grove MN, movie actor (“American Reunion”, “The Dukes of Hazzard”)

1979 [34] Josh Klinghoffer, LA CA, rock guitarist (Red Hot Chili Peppers-“The Adventures of Rain Dance Maggie”, “Dani California”)

1980 [33] Danny O’Donoghue, Dublin, Ireland, indie rock singer-songwriter (The Script-“Hall of Fame”, “For the First Time”)/TV personality (“The Voice UK”)

1988 [25] A$AP Rocky (Rakim Mayers), Harlem NY, rapper (f/Drake, 2 Chainz & Kendrick Lamar-“F—in’ Problems”, f/Skrillex & Birdy Nam Nam-“Wild For the Night”)

• “German Unification Day”, celebrating the 1990 reuniting of East & West Germany to once again become a single country after 45 years. It was one of the benchmarks of the end of the ‘Cold War’.

• “Look At the Leaves Day”, a day to admire the color changes of Autumn. (Now imagine the leaves a foot-and-half deep all over your backyard and a rake in your blistered hand …)

• “Techies Day”, the 14th annual observance to heighten the profile of IT careers and show appreciation for technology professionals. (Hurray, it’s “Geek Day”!)

2003 [10] Roy Horn of Siegfried & Roy is attacked by one of their tigers, cancelling their Las Vegas show until 2009, when they rejoin the tiger onstage

2003 [10] The film of the benefit “The Concert For George”, an all-star tribute to recently deceased ex-Beatle George Harrison, opens in movie theaters

2007 [06] The Rolling Stones’ “A Bigger Bang” tour sets a new record for concert grosses after the 2-year jaunt rakes in a total close to $560 million

1863 [150] US president Abraham Lincoln announces the 1st official “Thanksgiving” holiday to be celebrated on November 26, 1863

[Fri] Blessing Of the Animals Day
[Fri] Improve Your Office Day
[Fri] Cinnamon Roll Day
[Fri] Taco Day
[Fri] World Smile Day
This Week Is … Carry a Tune Week
This Month Is … Physical Therapy Month


✗ It’s being held outside a bowling alley.
✗ Topless babes dancing on the hood of the next car turn out to be your daughters.
✗ Host asks: “What’ll ya have … veggie frank or tofu burrito?”
✗ Opposing team’s mascot takes a leak on your Hibachi.
✗ The Chateau-Neuf-de-Pape has been improperly decanted; the vichyssoise is tepid; and the canapés are pedestrian, at best.

Those who can’t write, write manuals.

You have been asked to come up with an ‘epithalamium’. What is it?
a. A sample of all your body fluids.
b. A poem to celebrate a wedding. [CORRECT]
c. An original epitaph for a tombstone.
– Yahoo! Trivia

Is there anything you can’t say ‘no’ to?

Question: Two-thirds of us actually look forward to THIS every day.
Answer: Going to work.

Any landing you can walk away from is a good one.

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