Tuesday, October 31, 2017 – Edition: #6087

Let’s See What BS We Can SCARE Up…!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Viewers have blasted Adam Sandler after he kept touching British actress Claire Foy’s knee during Friday night’s Graham Norton show.  That comes after a wave of women have spoken out about sexual harassment and assault in all areas of public life, sparked by the string of allegations which emerged against Harvey Weinstein.  Foy, the star of Netflix series ‘The Crown’ appeared to be squirming as Sandler repeatedly rested his hand on her lower thigh during the BBC One chat program.
-MSN
★ ‘This Is Us’ star Justin Hartley is a married man. The 40-year-old exchanged vows with actress Chrishell Stause in what is being called an intimate and emotional outdoor ceremony on Saturday.  Hartley, who plays Kevin Pearson on ‘This is Us’, was joined by his famous co-stars Mandy Moore, Sterling K. Brown, Milo Ventimiglia, Chrissy Metz, Susan Watkins and Chris Sullivan to celebrate the couple’s nuptials.
-Jam.Canoe
★ Legendary horror filmmaker John Carpenter has revealed that he never intended for there to be a sequel to his 1978 film ‘Halloween’, because he thought there was no story left to tell.  Halloween spawned seven sequels, a 2007 remake, and a 2009 sequel to the remake.  Carpenter has announced that a new Halloween film will be released on October 19, 2018.  The new movie will pretend ”the other sequels never happened”.
-ContactMusic
★ Kate Winslet says she receives harsh criticism from Woody Allen when she’s on set. Winslet is shooting ‘Wonder Wheel’ alongside Justin Timberlake, and says Allen doesn’t hesitate to tell her he is “bored” watching her act out her scenes.  Winslet says Allen doesn’t do it in a mean way and she doesn’t take his comments to heart because, as she puts it, she is from the “school of hard knocks”.
(And if Woody Allen tells you that you’re boring, your BORR-ING!)
-MSN
★ Christopher McDonald, who played Shooter McGavin in classic comedy ‘Happy Gilmore’, has been arrested for drunk driving.  The 62-year-old actor crashed his Porsche into a highway embankment on Saturday night in Lake Arrowhead, California.  Reportedly, McDonald told police about his Happy Gilmore role, hoping to avoid arrest because of his relative celebrity status. Instead, police took him into custody and charged him with drink driving. This is McDonald’s second DWI arrest, after an initial arrest back in 2013.
-NME
★ Kevin Spacey says he is “beyond horrified” by allegations that he made a sexual advance on a teen boy decades ago.  Spacey posted on Twitter that he doesn’t remember any such encounter, but says, “if I did behave then as he describes, I owe him the sincerest apology for what would have been deeply inappropriate drunken behaviour , and I am sorry for the feelings he describes having carried with him all these years.” Spacey also confirmed his sexuality, saying that he chooses to live “as a gay man” and he plans to examine his own behaviour.
-Yahoo

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Kristen Bell, Dave Grohl, Alice Cooper
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Millie Bobby Brown, Kelly Clarkson
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Mark Ruffalo, Chris Matthews, Gilbert Gottfried, Thundercat
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Anthony Bourdain, Aya Cash, Anton Fig
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Allison Janney, Rep. Nancy Pelosi, Iliza Shlesinger
• “Conan” (TBS/Comedy): JB Smoove, Whitney Cummings, Joel Kim Booster
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Julianne Moore, Whoopi Goldberg
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): JB Smoove, Yvette Nicole Brown, the Broadway cast of “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory”
• “The Talk” (CBS): Guest co-hosts Carrie Ann Inaba & Terry Crews
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Andy Cohen, Jonathan & Drew Scott, Chris Harrison
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Julie Bowen, Sofie Dossi
• “The Voice” (NBC): “The Best of the Season” The best moments of the season, from the blind auditions through the battles, are relived from the perspective of the coaches and their battle advisers. Also: Kelly Clarkson participates in the first “Voice Halloween Confessional.”

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Selena Gomez – wants to record a song that she wrote with Justin Bieber when they were dating.  She is convinced that it could be her next big hit.
• Miley Cyrus – will always look back on her Disney days with pride. She played Hannah Montana until 2006 and while she enjoyed it, she admits it was ”A lot to put on a kid to have them have to get their makeup done and then also balance school and then also have me dress up in a wig. It’s a little Toddlers and Tiaras”.
• One Direction – Their Scooby Doo-themed tour bus is being sold at auction. The 2011 vehicle cost £70,000 (US $92,000) to convert into a luxury cruiser.  From the outside, it is a replica of the Mystery Machine, the vehicle used in the classic cartoon series.
• Teddy Geiger – The ‘For You I Will (Confidence)’ singer and songwriter of hits for Shaun Mendes and One Direction, says he is transitioning from male to female.  The 29-year-old says he’s at the “start of the process”.
• Maroon 5 – singer Adam Levine says he has more respect for women after borrowing his wife’s clothes for Halloween. He joked on Instagram: ”Raided my wife’s closet. Wearing girl stuff is NOT easy. Respect to the females.”
• George Michael – 27 years after his ‘Listen Without Prejudice’ hit #1 on the British album charts, it has returned to the top.  The new edition of the album also includes his MTV Unplugged performance.
• Mick Jagger – has been romancing a 22-year-old film producer. The 74-year-old Rolling Stone reportedly enjoyed a number of dates with Noor Alfallah while the group were in Paris for their ‘No Filter’ tour earlier this month. (Remember, this is the guy who sought treatment for sex addiction and wound up seducing his sex therapist, according to reports…)
• Beatles — A Christmas card written by John Lennon is on sale for $15,000. The festive note was penned by Lennon in 1968 for his wife Yoko Ono’s ex, music producer Tony Cox, and the former couple’s daughter, Kyoko Cox.
• U2 –  Bono has revealed that he suffered a serious health scare that affected his writing for the band’s forthcoming album ‘Songs Of Experience’.  While he wouldn’t go into specifics, he says  that he took inspiration from poet Brendan Kennelly and focused on writing songs as if he were composing them after death. (Happy Halloween!)
• Metallica – covered hometown heroes Oasis’ song ‘Don’t Look Back in Anger’ at their Manchester, U.K. show Saturday night.  Video can be found online.
• Brad Paisley – knows he has a somber task ahead of him when he co-hosts the 51st Annual CMA Awards November 8.  The show will include acknowledgment of the tragic loss of life that took place at Route 91 Harvest festival in Las Vegas on October 1st.  According to Paisley, who is co-hosting with Carrie Underwood,  “We have to make sure we honor those we’ve lost, but we also [have to] celebrate this music, which lives on, and do a good job having the heart we need to have on that night.
• Granger Smith – promised on Instagram Friday that he is going to personally call every person who buys his new ‘When the Good Guys Win’ album in its first week of release.   Anyone who pre-ordered the album or goes to a store to buy it through Nov. 3 can expect a call.  Be ready to upload your receipt as proof of purchase.

THIS WEEK’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “The Dark Tower” (PG-13, Horror, Science Fiction):  The last Gunslinger, Roland Deschain, has been locked in an eternal battle with Walter O’Dim, also known as the Man in Black, determined to prevent him from toppling the Dark Tower, which holds the universe together. With the fate of the worlds at stake, good and evil collide in the ultimate battle. (Idris Elba, Matthew McConaughey, Tom Taylor)
• “Kidnap” (R-Rated, Action/Adventure):  A typical afternoon in the park turns into a nightmare for single mom Karla Dyson when her son suddenly disappears. Without a cell phone and knowing she has no time to wait for police help, Karla jumps in her car and sets off in pursuit of the kidnappers. (Halle Berry, Sage Correa, Chris McGinn)
• “Person to Person” (Not Rated, Drama):  Follows a variety of New York characters as they navigate personal relationships and unexpected problems over the course of one day. (Abbi Jacobson, Michael Cera, Tavi Gevinson)

IS NOTHING SACRED?
It seems that a major taboos is falling as more millennials enter the workforce.  A study shows that fully half of millennials are comfortable discussing their compensation at work with friends.  That’s compared to 36% of Americans overall, according to a new study from personal finance website TheCashlorette.com. Workers between 18 and 36 are four times more likely than baby boomers to talk to colleagues about their salary, raises and promotions. This  openness about money has the potential to put more pressure on employers to institute formal guidelines for promotions and to pay workers on an “equal pay for equal work” basis.
(It’s not surprising that millennials are more willing to talk about their pay.  What IS surprising is that they are talking at all, as opposed to texting!)
(I’d be happy to talk about my pay.  If it was worth talking about!
-WallStreetJournal

HAVE A GOOD HALLOWEEN:
Here are some variances to some traditional Halloween customs that could help ensure that everyone has a happy Halloween:
➢ Teal is the new Orange: Teal-colored pumpkins announce to visitors that you have nut-free and non-candy items to offer kids with allergies or other restrictions that make it hard to find suitable treats.
➢ Call in the ‘Switch Witch’:  Even if your kid has no food issues, you might not want them to eat a lot of candy, so some families call in the ‘Candy Fairy’, ‘Halloween Fairy’, or the ‘Great Pumpkin’, but increasingly, the ‘Switch Witch’ is the Halloween hero.  Kids get to indulge on Halloween night, and before they go to bed, they pick out an agreed-upon number of treats to save for the future. The rest is packed up for the Switch Witch, who visits at night when children are sleeping.  The loot is placed out for the witch to grab, and in exchange, she leaves a new toy, book or even money.
➢ Mix it Up:  Shift the emphasis away from gorging on sweets and on to family-oriented experiences: an afternoon of crafts, a movie night, a special family dinner before trick-or-treating, or even a party.
(Are these the kind of people who give out fruit to trick-or-treaters?)
-CP

A NO BS RANKING OF STUFF YOU GET TRICK-OR-TREATING:
Halloween handouts rated from worst-to-first …
• Nothing – The porch light is on, but no one answers the door. Ripoff!
• Religious Pamphlets – And a lecture on how evil Halloween is.
• Healthy Snacks like Raisins –What, no sugar tonight?
• Pencils and/or Erasers – This is a ‘treat’?.
• Old People Candy – Tastes stale. How long did they have this stuff in the cupboard?
• Soft Drink Cans – A giant brick you have to carry in your bag the rest of the night.
• Gum – Strangely dissatisfying on Halloween. And why is it so hard?
• Homemade Treats –From a random house somewhere on your route? Cold shivers.
• Self-Serve Candy – Bingo! But sometimes it’s all gone or has been exposed to the elements.
• Fun-Size Candy Bars – You know, the little shrunken ones. Takes 10 to satisfy a craving.
• Full-Size Candy Bars – Yasss! The holy grail of trick-or-treating.

BS CHRONOMETER 10.31.17

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .

1961 [56] Larry Mullen Jr, Dublin, Ireland, rock drummer (U2-“Sunday Bloody Sunday”,  “With or Without You”)

1961 [56] Peter Jackson, Pukerua Bay NZ, filmmaker (“The Hobbit” films, “Lord Of the Rings” trilogy)

1963 [54] Rob Schneider, San Francisco CA, movie actor (“Deuce Bigalow”, “Hot Chick”)/TV actor (Saturday Night Live 1990-94)/father of singer Elle King

1966 [51] Adam Horovitz, New York, rapper (known as ‘Ad-Rock’, “Beastie Boys” guitarist)

1967 [50] Vanilla Ice (Rob Van Winkle), Dallas TX, rapper (‘Ice, Ice Baby’ and….ummmm…..) ‘Ice Ice Baby’ was the first hip hop song to reach the top of the Billboard Singles Chart

1976 [41] Piper Perabo, Dallas TX, movie actress (“Coyote Ugly”, “The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle”)

2000 [17] Willow Smith, Los Angeles CA, pop singer (‘Whip My Hair’, ‘Fireball’)/daughter of Will and Jada Pinkett Smith

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Halloween”, a longtime tradition in Canada, Ireland, the UK, and the USA. In recent years, the celebration has spread to other countries around-the-world.

• “Caramel Apple Day”, saluting the tasty Fall treat made by dipping apples on a stick into hot caramel (or Kraft Caramels back in the day).  Not many people hand them out to trick-or-treaters anymore, but you can enjoy them yourself!

• “Carve a Pumpkin Day”, this is your last chance to carve a pumpkin because Halloween is tonight. Pull out your caring patterns and get down to work. (Or try carving a turnip…see ‘Halloween Trivia’, below…)

• “International Magic Day,” traditionally a day for magicians to meet, celebrated on the anniversary of Harry Houdini’s death on October 31st, 1926.

• “International UNICEF Day”, observed on October 31st since 1967, the reason many trick-or-treaters collect donations in UNICEF coin boxes.

• “Knock-Knock Jokes Day”, celebrating their momentous contribution to the comedy world.
Two of the worst:
“Knock-Knock.” “Who’s there?”  “Cows go.”  “Cows go who?”  “No, silly.  Cows go Moo.”
“Knock-knock.”  “Who’s there?”  “Interrupting pirate.”  “Interrupt…” “ARRRRRRRRR!”

AND REMEMBER…
[Wed] All Saints Day
[Wed] National Eating Healthy Day
[Thurs] Cookie Monster Day
[Thurs] National Men Make Dinner Day

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1993 [24] Tim Burton’s animated musical ‘The Nightmare Before Christmas’ hits US theaters

2006 [11] After 35 years at the helm, game show host Bob Barker announces he’ll retire from CBS-TV’s “The Price Is Right” (Drew Carey takes over)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2005 [12] The white suit John Lennon wore on the cover of The Beatles’ “Abbey Road” album sells at an Amnesty International charity auction in Las Vegas for $118,000

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1892 [125] Arthur Conan Doyle publishes ‘The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes’

2011 [06] “Day of Seven Billion”, the day officially designated by the UN Population Fund as the approximate date on which the world’s population reached 7 billion (coincidentally all of them are in front of you in the DMV lineup!)  Current world population:   7,700,000,000…and counting…updates here:  http://www.worldometers.info/world-population/

BULL’S BITS

BS HALLOWEEN WACK FACTS:
✓ Halloween is the second highest grossing commercial holiday after Christmas.
✓ The word “witch” comes from the Old English ‘wicce’, meaning “wise woman.”
✓ According to tradition, if a person wears his or her clothes inside out and then walks backwards on Halloween, he or she will see a witch at midnight.
✓ Fifty percent of kids prefer to receive chocolate for Halloween, compared with 24% who prefer non-chocolate candy and 10% who prefer gum.
✓ Because the movie ‘Halloween’ (1978) was on such a tight budget, they had to use the cheapest mask they could find for the Michael Meyers character.  That turned out to be a William Shatner ‘Star Trek’ mask.
✓ Comedian John Evans once quipped: “What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o’-lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin π.”

BEST OF BS:
Highlight bits culled from 23 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
BS HALLOWEEN TRICKS FOR DUMMIES:
• Soaping your neighbor’s Microsoft Windows.
• Tipping cows … more than the standard 15%.
• Eggo-ing your neighbor’s car.
• Prank-calling a girl and asking in a spooky voice, “Do you like light-hearted romantic movies?”
• Ringing the neighbor’s doorbell, lighting a paper bag on fire, then attempting to place dog doo in bag.
– First published in “BS” 2001.

BS REASONS TRICK-OR-TREATING IS BETTER THAN SEX:
• The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some.
• You don’t have to compliment the person who gives you something.
• If you get a stomach ache, it won’t last 9 months.
• If you wear your ‘Batman’ mask, no one thinks you’re kinky.
• Doesn’t matter if kids hear you moaning and groaning.
• If you don’t get what you want, you can always try next door.

BS HALLOWEEN TRIVIA:
• This popular Halloween game started as a way of determining your future spouse. [Bobbing for Apples.]
• On October 30th, 1938 Orson Welles’s radio version of “War of the Worlds” caused panic when listeners believed a simulated news bulletin announcing a Martian invasion of New Jersey. What was the name of the acting troupe that proved to be so convincing? [The Mercury Players.]
• If you suffer from samhainophobia (SOW’-an-o-foh-bee-uh), what do you fear? [Halloween]
• ‘Halloween’ or ‘All Hallow’s Eve’ is the night before what Christian observance. [Well duh – ‘All Hallow’s Day’, more commonly known as ‘All Saints Day’.]
• Instead of pumpkins, what did the Irish originally carve into faces for Halloween? [Turnips]

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Some people have skeletons in their closet. I have a whole graveyard!

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ What is the most scared you’ve ever been?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  In a Halloween poll, THIS was ranked the #1 most popular treat to receive.
Answer:  Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Everything worth doing starts with being scared.


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