Wednesday, October 7, 2015        Edition: #5344

Ahhhh, Your Daily Bovine Colonic!

★ The body of actor Jim Carrey’s tragic on/off girlfriend Cathriona White will be released to her husband for repatriation to her native Ireland. An official working for the Los Angeles County Medical Examiner confirms that White was married at the time of her suspected suicide last week and therefore the husband is the next of kin. The news has been confirmed by a source close to Carrey, who reveals the deceased was separated from her husband.
– “Hollywood Reporter”
★ CBS-TV is developing a contemporary new take on teen detective ‘Nancy Drew’. “Grey’s Anatomy” writers & producers have been recruited to develop creator Edward Stratemeyer’s classic character for a new series on the small-screen. The new version will feature the young sleuth grown up and in her 30s, working as a detective for the NYPD. ‘Nancy Drew’ has been adapted for numerous TV shows and films over the years, including the most recent 2007 version starring Emma Roberts as the title character.
– “Entertainment Weekly”
★ Romance author Nicholas Sparks has signed on to produce a semi-autobiographical TV comedy based on his recent divorce. “The Notebook” author will executive produce “The Next Chapter”, which centers on a top-selling romance writer who is dealing with a separation from his wife. The author finds himself learning how to live as a bachelor again, while dealing with the public pressures of being an ‘expert’ on love. Sparks announced he & wife Cathy were separating after 25 years of marriage in January.
★ And actress Nicole Kidman’s adopted daughter has reportedly tied the knot. The Australian movie star and her ex-husband Tom Cruise became parents to Isabella (now 22) in 1992, before adopting their son Connor 3 years later. According to Australian magazine “Women’s Day”, Nicole was in attendance at Isabella’s nuptials to her boyfriend Max Parker back on September 18th in London UK.

• “American Horror Story: Hotel” (FX) – Season 5 debut. Lady Gaga stars as ‘Elizabeth’, owner of the ‘Hotel Cortez’, who has a nefarious plan revealed in Episode 1 which plays out over the season. Also in the cast: Angela Bassett, Chloe Sevigny, Emma Roberts, and Kathy Bates. (If Gaga really wanted to be scary, she could make another album with Tony Bennett.)
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Robert Delong (“In the Cards”).
• “Dragons’ Den” (CBC) – Season 10 debut with 3 new dragons: Joe Mimran (Joe Fresh); Michele Romanow (; and Manjit Minhas (Minhas Breweries); who join incumbents Jim Treliving and Michael Wekerle.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Thomas Rhett (“Tangled Up”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Thomas Rhett again.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Cat Power (“Sun”).
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Sara Bareilles (“What’s Inside: Songs from Waitress”, out November 11th).
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Tame Impala (“Currents”).
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Jewel (“Picking Up the Pieces”).

• Beastie Boys – Fans have figured out that a new “Star Wars” character’s name is actually a Beastie Boys reference. ‘Ello Asty’, an ‘X-Wing’ pilot in “Star Wars: Episode VII – The Force Awakens” (December 18th), is a tip-of-the-hat to the Beasties’ 1999 release “Hello Nasty”.
• Blake Shelton – He tells CMT he is “in a good place” and loving life following his divorce from fellow country music star Miranda Lambert in July. Things were tough at first, he admits, but have worked out OK. The former couple began dating in 2005, and got hitched in 2011.
• Blink-182 – Drummer Travis Barker has confirmed he is dating pop star Rita Ora, revealing they met at a charity basketball game in Los Angeles in September. He also admits the cheerleader outfit she wore caught his attention.
• The Judds – Tonight the veteran mother-daughter country act reunite for “Girls Night Out”, a 9-show residency at The Venetian Theatre inside The Venetian Las Vegas. The gigs run through October 24th. It’s the first concerts by Naomi & Wynonna Judd together in 5 years.
• Kelsea Ballerini – The “Love Me Like You Mean It” country singer’s recent housewarming party had some heavyweight names on the guest list …  Lady Antebellum’s Hillary Scott and Taylor Swift.
• Maddie & Tae – Tonight the “Girl In a Country Song” duo rev up their “Start Here Tour” in NYC. The 12-date trek in listening room and music club venues runs through November 7th in Chicago IL.
• Megadeth – The veteran rockers have announced their 15th album, “Dystopia”, will be released on January 22nd. “Rolling Stone” notes that it will be the 1st Megadeth release since lead guitarist Chris Broderick and drummer Shawn Drover exited the lineup in 2014.

Burger King’s black ‘Halloween Whopper’ turns your poop green, consumers are saying online. It seems something in the burger’s pitch-black bun causes the ghastly bright green color for as long as 3 days. Some describe the shade as ‘cartoon green’ or ‘comical green’. It’s unclear what ingredient in the black Whopper turns stool such a haunting hue, but a spokesperson for the fast food giant says the bun contains less than 1% food dye and claims the black color comes from “the smoky black pepper flavor of A-1 Sauce baked into the bun”. The restaurant chain first introduced the burger in Japan last year, using bamboo charcoal to give the bun its black shade. The North American equivalent does not use that ingredient. (“Mom, come see what I made!”)
– ABC News

A statistical look at who we are and the things we do …
• 61% of us say ‘I love you’ regularly via smart phone, but only 20% in person.
• 60% of people lie 6 times per hour. That’s one lie every 10 minutes.
• 31% of pet owners have cooked a meal for their pet.
• 30% of sports fans have cried at a sporting event when their team lost.
• 22% of teens admit to regularly getting up in the middle of the night to use social media.
• 8% of women own 10 or more perfumes.

Men are painting one or more fingernails blue as part of a campaign to end violence against children. The so-called ‘Polished Man’ movement was started by the CEO of Australian charity YGAP after he visited Cambodia. The innovative campaign is intended to raise awareness and funds to support the 1-in-5 children who suffer physical and sexual violence before age 18. It’s estimated 90% of the world’s sexual violence against children is by men. The majority of it happens behind closed doors and is committed by people known to the child. The charity is hoping the campaign will be spread globally by men who want this to change.

New terms entering the lingo …
• ‘Auto-Buy’ – To automatically purchase the next version or edition of something because you have liked the previous items in the series. (This is also known as being an ‘Apple user’.)
• ‘Topiarize’ – To artfully trim a beard or other facial hair. From the word ‘topiary’, the art of clipping shrubs or trees into ornamental shapes. (Um, is that an elephant on your chin?)
• ‘Small-Footprint Living’ – A lifestyle that minimizes one’s impact on the environment. (“Yeah, we’re into small-footprint living; we’re down to 3 cars now.”)

Bell bottoms have flared up again. Fashionistas are swapping skinny jeans and matchstick pants for wide-leg trousers inspired by the ones their parents boogied down with in the 1970s … but with a modern flair. Designer Stacy Bendet says the modern bell bottom is “very fitted and sexy with a wide hem and a really snug shape through the butt and upper thigh and leg until the knee, where the flare starts”. While for many it may seem the flare is ‘back’, there is an entire generation of younger women that weren’t yet around to experience the look last time it was in fashion. Beyoncé, Gisele Bundchen, and Kylie Jenner are among the famous who’ve opted for the new flared look. (Try not to appear too ‘Brady Bunch’.)

People who do not get enough sleep are more likely to catch a cold.
– “The Independent”


1951 [64] John Mellencamp, Seymour IN, pop-rock singer (“Jack & Diane”, “Hurts So Good”)/Farm Aid co-founder/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (2008)

1953 [62] Tico (Hector) Torres, NYC, classic rock drummer (Bon Jovi-“Always”, “Livin’ On a Prayer”)

1959 [56] Simon Cowell, Brighton UK, TV personality (“American Idol” 2002-10)/TV producer (“The X Factor UK” since 2004, “America’s Got Talent” since 2006)/entertainment mogul (Syco Music)

1967 [48] Toni Braxton, Severn MD, R&B/pop singer (“Unbreak My Heart”, “Breathe Again”)

1968 [47] Thom Yorke, Wellingborough UK, rock singer-guitarist (Radiohead-“Nude”, Creep”)

1975 [40] Damian Kulash, Washington DC, rock singer-guitarist (OK Go-“Here It Goes Again”, “Get Over It”)

1979 [36] Shawn Ashmore, Richmond BC, TV actor (“The Following” 2013-15)/movie actor (‘Iceman’ in “X-Men” films)

1982 [33] Jake McLaughlin, Paradise CA, TV actor (‘Agent Ryan Booth’ on “Quantico” 2015)

• “Balloons Around the World Day”, the 16th annual event celebrating ‘Balloon Sculpture’. Balloon artists worldwide showcase the art of balloon twisting and decorating and, in the process, deliver thousands of smiles through the act of giving. Make your own here …

• “International Walk to School Day”, the 15th annual observance on the 1st Wednesday of October designed to encourage kids to become more active.

• “Kale Day”, begun in 2014 by Dr Drew Ramsey (co-author of the book “50 Shades of Kale”) as a petition. Observed on the 1st Wednesday in October, it’s designed to increase awareness, access, and education about the positive health benefits of eating more kale.

• “Pet Obesity Awareness Day”, begun by veterinarians and veterinary healthcare personnel who are committed to making the lives of animals healthier and more vital. An estimated 54% of dogs and cats are overweight or obese.
– You have not seen its legs in 7 years.
– It has to enter the house through the garage door.
– You’ve named her ‘Princess Chunk’.
– No longer cleans itself unless heavily coated in whipped cream.
– Guests constantly mistake your pet for an overstuffed chair.
– Nose is always wet from sweating gravy.
– Enormous gut keeps the floors freshly buffed.
– Now expects a treat just for blinking.

2003 [12] In a State of California recall election, Arnold Schwarzenegger is elected Governor

1995 [20] Alanis Morrissette’s “Jagged Little Pill” album reaches #1  BS FACTOID: A remastered 4-CD ’20th Anniversary Collector’s Edition’ is out October 30th.

1965 [50] A 50-mph wind gust helps golfer Robert Mitera sink history’s longest hole-in-one, on the 447-yard 10th hole at Miracle Hill Golf Club in Omaha, Nebraska

2001 [14] Barry Bonds of the San Francisco Giants hits his 73rd home run of the season, setting a new (but tainted by steroids) Major League Baseball record

2012 [03] Antisa Khvichava, a Georgian woman believed to be the oldest woman of all-time, dies at age 132

[Thurs] Depression Screening Day
[Thurs] Pierogy Day
[Thurs] World Sight Day
[Fri] “Big Stone Gap”; “Pan” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Chess Day
This Week Is … Financial Planning Week
This Month Is … Global Diversity Awareness Month


• Too cold for a light coat; too warm for a heavy coat.
• Blisters from breaking in boots.
• Cold rain. Followed by cold rain.
• Whew! They turned the heat on in your apartment building way too soon.
• The lineup of people looking for costumes at Value Village is around the corner.
• You get out of work and it’s already pitch black outside.
• You can’t remember where your hat & gloves are.
• Leaves all over your car/porch/patio/sidewalk … again.
– Adapted from

Before 1900, what shape was ‘home plate’ in baseball?
a. Square. [CORRECT. It was square like all the other bases. In 1900, it was elongated to aid umpires in calling balls and strikes. If you ask most players, it hasn’t helped much.]
b. Diamond-shaped.
c. Round like a ‘plate’.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

A few favorite 2-word oxymorons …
• Working Vacation
• Fun Run
• Athletic Scholarship
• Accordion Music
• Tax Return
• Unbiased Opinion
• Act Naturally
• Industrial Park
• Resident Alien
• Sanitary Landfill
• Virtual Reality
(Ask listeners to contribute more.)

☎ It’s “Customer Service Week”. What’s the most amazing service you’ve ever received from a business?

Question: According to a survey, THIS is the first food most people learn how to cook.
Answer: Mac & cheese.

The trouble with life is there’s no background music.

Printer Friendly Version