Friday, October 9, 2015        Edition: #5346

Sheet Happens!

★ Today comedian Bill Cosby is scheduled to give a sworn deposition in a lawsuit brought by a woman accusing him of plying her with alcohol and sexually abusing her at LA’s Playboy Mansion when she was 15-years-old. It marks the first time 78-year-old Cosby has been ordered to testify under oath in response to a sexual misconduct complaint since he gave a deposition in a Pennsylvania case settled out of court 9 years ago. Tonight 27 of the women accusing Cosby of assault have agreed to give on-camera interviews as part of an NBC News special. Kate Snow will moderate tonight’s hour-long “Dateline” episode. Attorney Gloria Allred, who is representing many of the accusers, is also taking part in the program.
– Reuters /
★ Chic, Janet Jackson, and The Smiths are among the acts nominated for 2016 induction into the Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame. Also on the just-announced long-list: The Cars, Chaka Khan, Cheap Trick, Chicago, Deep Purple, Los Lobos, NWA, Nine Inch Nails, The Spinners, Steve Miller (as a solo artist), and Yes. A shortlist, comprised of 5 acts, will be announced in December. The 2016 honorees will be inducted into the Hall of Fame in a ceremony in Cleveland, Ohio next April.
★ Actor George Clooney is looking at a vacation home in Tuscany. The movie star already owns properties in Los Angeles, Mexico, and near Lake Como, Italy; and is planning to move into his new marital home in England with wife Amal later this year once renovations are complete. However, George now has his eye on a cliff-top Italian villa in the seaside town of Castiglione della Pescaia, an area recommended to him by his chef pal Federico Salza. Word has it he’s put an offer in.
– Bang Showbiz
★ And 47-year-old actor Daniel Craig has joked he’d rather “slash wrists” than do another ‘James Bond’ movie. He’s portrayed the legendary MI-6 agent for nearly a decade and admits he now feels ready to hang up his spyware even though there’s still another film in his contract. What may change his mind is this … he’s reportedly being paid circa $60 million for starring in “Spectre” (opening October 26th in UK; November 6th in North America). That healthy chunk of change makes him the highest-paid ‘Bond’ ever.
– “The Sun”

• BET Hip-Hop Awards (Atlanta GA) – Tonight Snoop Dogg returns as host. Performers include Fetty Wap, Kid Ink, Rich Homie Quan, TI, and Young Dro. The ‘I Am Hip Hop Award’ is presented to legendary rapper Scarface. An edited gala special airs Tuesday on BET.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Today Selena Gomez (“Revival”, out today. It includes the version of “Good For You” that features A$AP Rocky.)
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight Fidlar (“Don’t Try”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight Toronto noise-rock band Metz (“Metz II”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Tonight Highly Suspect (“Mister Asylum”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Tonight Halsey (“Badlands”).
• “Live With Kelly & Michael” (syndicated/CTV) – Today Sara Bareilles (“What’s Inside: Songs from Waitress”, out November 11th).
• Nashville Songwriters Hall of Fame Induction (Nashville TN) – Sunday Rosanne Cash, Mark James, Even Stevens, and Craig Wiseman are the latest inductees. They’re being added to the other 196 members of the writing fraternity.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC/Global) – Comedian Amy Schumer makes her hosting debut; musical guest The Weeknd (“Beauty Behind the Madness”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Tonight Nelly (“MO”).
• “Unity – The Latin Tribute to Michael Jackson” (PBS) – Tonight Sheila E hosts a salute to the late ‘King of Pop’ by Latin artists.
• “The Walking Dead” (AMC) – Sunday in the 6th season debut, “First Time Again”, a new threat arises that could bring the group closer together.

• Chance The Rapper – Saturday his “Family Matters Tour” begins in Austin TX. The Fall tour of North America winds up in Los Angeles CA on November 24th.
• The Cure – It’s announced they’ll embark on a 25-date North American tour in 2016, along with Scottish post-punk band The Twilight Sad. The full schedule of tour dates will be revealed in January.
• Florence + The Machine – Tonight-through-Sunday beginning at Austin City Limits in Austin TX they roll out a new run of North American tour dates. Stops are scheduled through October 27th in Seattle WA.
• Green Day – Tonight “Heart Like a Hand Grenade”, a long-lost documentary about the making of the 2004 album “American Idiot”, screens at the 38th Mill Valley Film Festival in San Rafael CA. It opens in select movie theaters next Thursday. The film was previously screened only once, for just a few hundred fans in 2009.
• Mat Kearney – Tonight in Chattanooga TN the Fall leg of his “Just Kids Tour” launches and continues through October 30th in St Louis MO. The opening act is Parachute.
• Rihanna – Her next album will be called “Anti”.The 27-year-old revealed the name at an event this week in LA’s MAMA Gallery. But she says fans may still have a long wait for her 8th studio album as she is still working on it.
• Ten Commandos – Today this new supergroup drops its 1st single, “Staring Down the Dust”. The band includes members of Pearl Jam, Queens Of the Stone Age, Screaming Trees, and Soundgarden. The rest of their debut album is expected in November.
• Taylor Swift – She has vowed she will no longer become embroiled in conflicts on Twitter following her online row with rapper Nicki Minaj earlier this year.
• Toby Keith – His new album “35 MPH Town” is released today. It includes “Drunk Americans” and his latest single, the title track. Keith co-produced and co-wrote most of the songs.

• “Big Stone Gap” ( PG-13 Romantic Comedy ): In a small town nestled in the Appalachian Mountains of Virginia, self-proclaimed spinster ‘Ave Maria Mulligan’ finds her life shaken up and forever changed after learning a long-buried family secret. Stars Ashley Judd, Patrick Wilson, Whoopi Goldberg, John Benjamin Hickey.
• “Pan” ( PG Fantasy Adventure ): How ‘Peter’ became ‘Pan’ is given the blockbuster treatment in this re-imagining of the JM Barrie story. As a 12-year-old orphan ‘Peter’ is spirited away to the magical world of ‘Neverland’ where he ultimately discovers his destiny. Stars Hugh Jackman, Garrett Hedlund, Rooney Mara.
• Opening in limited release: “The Final Girls” (Horror Comedy); “Steve Jobs” (Biographical Drama opens in LA/NYC); and “Victoria” (Crime Thriller).

The world’s first ‘robot farm’ is scheduled to open in 2017 as a Japanese agricultural firm plans to replace humans with machines in its lettuce-growing facilities. A hi-tech new factory near Kyoto will use smart machines to automate every step of the planting process, from germination to seeding, harvesting and delivery, while also monitoring levels of carbon dioxide and lighting conditions. Output is expect to reach 10 million heads of lettuce a year. Not only will this boost production by 25%, it’s expected to cut labor costs in half and these savings could be passed onto consumers. (Out of work farmers who’ll need cheap food.)

French emperor Napoleon’s daily shopping list during his exile on St Helena included 42 eggs, 68 lbs of bread, 31 bottles of Cape wine, 10 bottles of claret, 3 bottles of malt liquor, 3 bottles of cider, and a bottle of champagne.
– “The Times”


1952 [63] Sharon Osbourne (Arden), Brixton UK, TV personality (“The Talk” since 2010, “America’s Got Talent” 2007-12, “The X-Factor UK” 2004-13, “The Osbournes” 2002-05)/Mrs Ozzy Osbourne since 1982

1964 [51] Guillermo del Toro, Guadalajara, Mexico, filmmaker (“The Hobbit” films, “Pan’s Labyrinth”)

1979 [36] Brandon Routh, Norwalk IA, TV actor (‘Ray Palmer/The Atom’ on “Arrow” since 2014)/movie actor (“Superman Returns”)

1993 [22] Scotty McCreery, Raleigh NC, country singer (“See You Tonight”)/”American Idol” Season 10 winner (2011)

Classic rock singer David Lee Roth (Van Halen) is 61; Rock drummer Mike Malinin (Goo Goo Dolls) is 48; Alt-rock singer-guitarist Dean Roland (Collective Soul) is 43; TV personality Mario Lopez (“Extra”) is 42.

NFL analyst Steve Young (“ESPN Monday Night Football”) is 54; TV-movie actress Joan Cusak (“Shameless”) is 53; TV-movie-Broadway actress Jane Krakowski (“Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt”) is 47; TV actress Emily Deschanel (“Bones”) is 39.

• “Fire Prevention Day”, a highlight of the annual observance of “Fire Prevention Week”. Why today? It marks the anniversary of the ‘Great Chicago Fire of 1871’, the disaster that began a movement toward fire prevention as an adjunct to firefighting.
• “Leif Erikson Day” in Norway and Iceland, commemorating the Viking explorer’s discovery of North America (‘Vinland’) circa 1000 AD … almost 500 years before Christopher Columbus.
• “UN World Post Day”, honoring the founding of the Universal Postal Union in 1874. Today the UPU, with 189 member countries, oversees the co-ordination of the global postal service.
• “World Egg Day”, observed annually on the 2nd Friday of October to salute the many uses of chicken embryos. Events are held across the world celebrating the egg.

• “Angel Food Cake Day”, honoring the dessert every starving dieter touts as being ‘fat-free’ … just before inhaling it in its entirety.
• “Costume Swap Day”, an annual opportunity to exchange last year’s Halloween outfits with someone you know on the 2nd Saturday of October, thereby sparing the stress and expense of coming up with something completely new.
• “World Homeless Day”, which emerged in 2010 from online discussions between people in various parts of the world working to respond to homelessness.
• “World Mental Health Day”, a day for global mental health education and awareness. It was first celebrated in 1992 at the initiative of the World Federation for Mental Health, which operates in more than 150 countries.
• “World Porridge Day”, a celebration of Scotland’s traditional national dish. It began in the wee Scottish Highlands village of Carrbridge (home of the annual “World Porridge Making Championship”) as a fundraiser to help feed needy children. So how do you like your gruel?

• “Clergy Appreciation Day”, observed on the 2nd Sunday of October to salute people of the cloth no matter their gender, denomination, or religion.
• “Coming Out Day”, a day to ‘announce your sexuality and be proud of it’, sponsored by the Human Rights Campaign to encourage gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people to ‘Talk About It’ with their families and friends.
• “Food Truck Day”, saluting the people who enable you to eat on the street. What’s the wackiest thing you ever bought from one?
• “International Day Of the Girl”, the 4th annual observance by the UN to increase awareness of the inequality faced by girls worldwide based upon their gender. The gap affects access to education, nutrition, legal rights, medical care, and protection from violence.
• “Southern Food Heritage Day”, the official day to pull out your cast iron pans and start up the smoker to enjoy your favorite traditional dishes from America’s South. Which is best? Catfish? Gumbo? Jambalaya? Pork jowls fried in possum fat?

2006 [09] Google pays more than $1.6 billion for video-sharing website YouTube

1940 [75] John Winston Lennon is born in Liverpool, England (hard to imagine what the music world would be like without his influence, both as a solo artist and as part of The Beatles)

2009 [06] Barack Obama becomes the 1st sitting US president since Woodrow Wilson to win the Nobel Peace Prize (before he’s even done anything!)

2011 [04] Germany’s 24-year-old Sebastian Vettel of Germany becomes the youngest driver to win the Formula One World Championship … twice

[Mon] Thanksgiving Day (Canada)
[Mon] Columbus Day (USA)
[Mon] Kick Butt Day
[Mon] World Arthritis Day
[Tues] International Day for Failure
This Week Is … No Salt Week
This Month Is … Celebrating the Bilingual Child Month


• “Error 402: Paper Jam”
• “Cannot Connect to Computer”
• “Out of Paper”
• “Cannot Detect Wi-Fi Connection”
• “Error 689: Out of Ink”
• “Printer Needs Reset”
• “Software Incompatible with PC”
• “Firewall Settings Too High
• “Ink Jets Need Cleaning”
• “Must Be Restored to Factory Settings”
• “Error 666: Printer Requires a Blood Sacrifice to Appease the Demon Lord”
• Printer is currently in pieces
– Adapted from

☎ What was your very first Halloween costume?

• Scatterbrain [Radiohead]
• Arbitrary Justice [Parenting Style]
• Slammed Doors [Parenting Style]
• Worrywort [Both]
• You Never Wash Up After Yourself [Radiohead]
• Who’s the Adult? [Parenting Style]
• Head in Hands [Parenting Style]
• Sulk [Radiohead]
• You & Whose Army? [Radiohead]
• I Am Citizen Insane [Both]
– Thanks to Kimberly Harrington

If there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s intolerance …

Question: It has been estimated that men burn about 1,200 calories doing THIS.
Answer: Watching a football game.

An optimist is someone who starts a crossword puzzle with a pen.

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