Thursday, September 2, 2010        Edition: #4335
Touch Your Screen – This BS Is Still Warm!


Despite her boyfriend’s magazine cover wedding proposal this week, “Jersey Shore” star  Snooki has assured her fans via Twitter that she’s remaining single (until she’s finished milking the whole ‘Guidette’ thing) . . . “Transformers 2” may not have been a masterpiece, but Shia Labeouf has been named the best value-for-money actor in the biz, bringing in $81 to the box office for every dollar he’s paid (would you work for 1.2% of profits from your show?) . . . “Modern Family” star Sofia Vergara hasn’t yet followed through with her promise to run down LA’s Sunset Boulevard naked if her show won the “Emmy Award” for ‘Best Comedy’ (as it did) . . .  A bulldog named Cadillac, belonging to celebrity DJ & Lindsay Lohan ex- Samantha Ronson, has allegedly mauled a neighbor’s Maltese dog to death – then attacked its female owner as well (no word on any charges as yet) . . . Depending on which expert you talk to, Paris Hilton could be facing serious jail time for her Vegas drug bust – or none at all (either way, her pay-to-party days in Sin City are likely over as clubs shun her) . . . 45-year-old “Harry Potter” author JK Rowling has donated $15.5 million to set up a new clinic at the University of Edinburgh in Scotland to carry out research into Multiple Sclerosis (MS), the disease that killed her mother at the same age (sounds like a lot but it’s less than 2% of her fortune) . . . And a Manchester UK man who created altered photos of “Harry Potter” actress Emma Watson by digitally pasting her head on another girl’s naked body and then posted them online in May has pleaded guilty to 19 charges and been sentenced to 3-years community service and registered as a sex offender (wow, if that’s the yardstick there are people running ‘fake celebrity’ websites who should be visiting ‘Old Sparky’ – the chair).


• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/A Channel) – Pete Yorn w/Scarlett Johansson.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – TI (“King Uncaged”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – BoB (“The Adventures of Bobby Ray”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – Heart (“Red Velvet Car”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Karen Elson (“The Ghost Who Walks”).
• “Lopez Tonight” (TBS) – Backstreet Boys (“This Is Us”).
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel) – Herbie Hancock (“The Imagine Project”).


• Black Crowes – Chris Robinson tells “Nylon Guys” magazine that Taylor Swift isn’t as talented as her legions of fans make her out to be. Quote: “She might be cute … but she’s horrible.”
• Brad Paisley – He’s extended his “H20 World Tour” with Darius Rucker & Justin Moore through November. Among added dates: Vancouver, Edmonton, Calgary, and Winnipeg October 2-7.
• Brooks & Dunn – Tonight’s the end of an era, the final show of their “Last Rodeo” tour. The concert at Nashville’s Bridgestone Arena is a fundraiser for the Country Music Hall of Fame.
• Green Day – Billie Joe Armstrong has revealed onstage in Denver CO that they’re recording a live album during their current North American tour.
• Jay-Z & Eminem – They’re kicking off their “Home & Home” stadium gigs, playing Detroit’s Comerica Park tonight and tomorrow, then NYC’s Yankee Stadium September 13 and 14.
• Lady Gaga – She’s debuted a new piano ballad called “Living On the Radio” during a show in St Paul MN. It’s expected it will appear on her highly-anticipated 3rd studio album which is finished but won’t be released until 2011.


A BS selection of movies in the making …
• Bosnian War Film – Angelina Jolie will write, produce, and make her directorial debut with a movie set during the 1990s Bosnian War. It’s a love story about a Bosnian woman and a Serb military man who bridge the opposite sides of the conflict. Jolie herself will not be in the film. Shooting’s expected to begin this Fall, with no locations announced due to security concerns.
• “Cross” – 37-year-old British-born actor Idris Elba (“28 Days Later”) will play ‘Dr Alex Cross’ in this murder mystery due to film next Spring. Morgan Freeman originally played the title’s namesake detective in the series’ first 2 films based on James Patterson novels, “Kiss the Girls” (1997) and “Along Came A Spider” (2001).
• “Scream 4” – Shooting is currently underway in Ann Arbor, Michigan on the latest chapter in the long-running horror series that began back in 1996. The cast includes regulars Neve Campbell, Courteney Cox, and David Arquette as well as Hayden Panettiere, Adam Brody, and Emma Roberts. Anna Paquin and Kristen Bell are doing cameos.
• Tupac Biofilm – The long-in-the-works Tupac Shakur movie may finally begin production this November, as new screenwriters have been brought in to pen a new script. The film will center on the last day of Tupac’s life, flashing back to the final 4 years leading up to it. The rapper’s 1996 murder remains unsolved.


In Britain, 1-in-4 lap dancers has a university degree, new research shows. A study of the industry has found that the majority of dancers are attracted into the profession by the money.  Many are aspiring actresses, models, and artists who hope to use lap dancing as a lucrative platform for breaking into their desired professions. Unemployed arts graduates who have been unable to get a foothold in their ideal careers since university also make up a sizable proportion of the lap dancers interviewed. (Lap dances $20. Dissertations on Chaucer, priceless.)
– “Daily Telegraph”


Bob Dylan’s “Brownsville Girl” may soon make the jump to the bigscreen as the story is used as the basis of a movie. Other songs that have inspired the Hollywood treatment …
5. “Alice’s Restaurant” by Arlo Guthrie. This enduring 18-minute song was the basis of a 1969 film that starred Guthrie as well as James Broderick (father of Matthew).
4. “Ode To Billie Joe” by Bobbie Gentry. The 1967 song about ‘Billie Joe McAllister jumping off the Tallahatchie Bridge’ was the subject of a 1976 film adaptation.
3. “The Gambler” by Kenny Rogers. The 1978 country crossover classic inspired a series of made-for-TV movies starring Rogers.
2. “Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band” by The Beatles. A horrendous 1978 film based on the iconic album starred Peter Frampton, Steve Martin, Alice Cooper, and the Bee Gees.
1. “Convoy” by CW McCall. This 1975 hit spent 6 weeks atop the country chart and a week atop the pop chart. The 1978 film starred Kris Kristofferson, Ali McGraw, and Ernest Borgnine.


Need proof? Check out a few of the wacky events of the past week …
• A Bakersfield doctor apparently tried to get into the home of her estranged boyfriend by sliding down the chimney … but got stuck. Her wedged and decomposing body was found days later.
• A 45-year-old Long Beach man convicted of attacking 6 women has been sentenced to 11 life terms in prison … PLUS 433 years.
• A 70-year-old inmate at San Quentin State Prison has been found hanged to death in his cell. He’d just had his death sentence rescinded a couple days earlier.


Bedbugs are on the attack across North America. A new ranking of the areas experiencing the worst increase in infestation, based on the number of pest-control treatments performed …
5. Manchester NH
4. Bloomington IN
3. Toronto ON
2. New York NY
1. Columbus OH


Here’s another reason not to try to talk on the phone while driving: A new University of Minnesota study finds that communication often suffers during car conversations. Why? The person who isn’t driving often cuts the conversation short out of concern for the driver’s safety, which the driver may interpret badly. Meantime, poor reception or road noise can contribute to vital missed dialogue, causing confusion on the non-driver’s end of the conversation. Researchers say both factors contribute to poor quality interaction. (And worse quality driving.)
– “Miller-McCune Magazine”


• As of 2009, there were 139 million drivers in China. That is 72.2 times as many as in 1978. (Meaning if you’re a fuzzy dice salesman, you’re one rich dude!)
• In Bavaria’s national language, Bairisch, there is no word for ‘love’. The phrase ‘I love you’ is literally ‘I like you’. (We’re guessing it’s heard a lot at Oktoberfest in Munich.)
– “Globe & Mail”


“I don’t want my face to fall off like Michael Jackson’s.”
– Heidi Montag in “Heat” magazine, expressing regrets about her extensive cosmetic surgery.


1948 [62] Terry Bradshaw, Shreveport LA, sports analyst (“FOX NFL Sunday”)/Hall of Fame NFL QB (Pittsburgh Steelers 1970-83, 4 Super Bowl titles)/Pro Football Hall of Fame (1989)

1951 [59] Mark Harmon, Burbank CA, TV actor (‘Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs’ on “Navy NCIS” since 2003)/movie actor (“Freaky Friday”)

1959 [51] Guy Laliberté, Québec City QC, billionaire founder & CEO of Cirque du Soleil (“Love”, “Viva Elvis”)/space tourist to International Space Station (September 2009)

1964 [46] Keanu Reeves, Beirut, Lebanon [grew up in Toronto], movie actor (“The Lake House”, “The Matrix” trilogy)

1966 [44] Salma Hayek, Coatzacoalcos, Mexico, movie actress (“Grown Ups”, “Frida”)/TV producer (“Ugly Betty” 2006-10)

1987 [23] Spencer Smith, Summerlin NV, rock drummer (Panic At the Disco-“Nine In the Afternoon”, “I Write Sins Not Tragedies”)

1987 [23] Scott Moir, London ON, ice dancer w/Tessa Virtue (2010 Olympic Champions, 2010 World Champions, 2008-10 Canadian National Champions)


• “Blueberry Popsicle Day”, a celebration of the flavor that leaves your lips and tongue looking like some kind of purple-fleshed alien.

• “National Beheading Day”. Not sure what you’re supposed to do to celebrate … just don’t lose your head over it.

• “National Day of Vietnam”, celebrating independence from Japan and France in 1945.

• “Take Another Look Day”, a day to survey your possessions and give surplus items to charity or reuse them in another project. In other words, dump some ‘stuff’!


2000 [10] On the cover of “TV Guide”: “Dennis Miller” of “Monday Night Football” (ABC)

2005 [05] Former TV star Bob Denver (“Gilligan’s Island”) dies in Winston-Salem NC at age 70


1995 [15] Grand opening of Cleveland’s “Rock & Roll Hall of Fame” is celebrated with a 7-hour concert featuring Bruce Springsteen, Chuck Berry, Jerry Lee Lewis, Little Richard, Martha & the Vandellas, John Mellencamp, and oodles more

1995 [15] Michael Jackson’s “You Are Not Alone” becomes the 1st-ever single to debut at #1 on “Billboard” magazine’s ‘Hot 100’

490 BC [2500] 1st ‘Marathon’ as Phidippides runs 26 miles from Marathon to Sparta (seeking a men’s room?)


1964 [46] Norman Manley scores 2 holes-in-one consecutively at Del Valley CA, the first recorded ‘Double Albatross’ (or ‘Double Ace’) in golf

[Fri] Lazy Moms Day
[Fri] “Going The Distance”; “Machete” open in movie theaters
[Sat] International Drive Your Studebaker Day
[Sat] Newspaper Carrier Day
[Sat] Oatmeal Day
[Sun] Be Late For Something Day
[Mon] Labor Day (Canada, USA)
This Week Is … Child Injury Prevention Week
This Month Is … Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Month


• ‘Climb Over the Fence’ and ‘That Bear Won’t Bite’.
• ‘Oops’ and ‘Prepare for Emergency Landing’.
• ‘Yeah, I Did Steal the Money’ and ‘Godfather’.
• ‘Big, Hungry Rottweiler’ and ‘Testicles’.
• ‘This Child’ and ‘Surprise, its Yours’.
• ‘She Has One Big Eye in the Middle of Her Forehead’ and ‘Likes You’.
• ‘Snooki’ and ‘Thong’.
– Adapted from


Considering his recent behavior, would you ever go to a Mel Gibson movie again? (Over 75% of those surveyed in a “Vanity Fair” poll say his recent racist/sexist remarks and allegedly abusive actions have ‘no bearing’ on whether they’d see another of his movies.)


• Which is a commonly-used nickname for the Beluga Whale?
a. The Sea Canary. [CORRECT, due to the bird-like chirping sounds it makes.]
b. The Great Guppy.
c. Fatso.

• What did 11-year-old Frank Epperson accidentally invent in 1905 when he left it on the back porch overnight?
a. Kitty Litter.
b. The Popsicle. [CORRECT. The fruit drink powder he mixed froze solid with the stir-stick still in it. It was originally called the ‘Epsicle’.]
c. The Whoopee Cushion.


Alt-rock band Arcade Fire has just released the first HTML5-powered music video for its most recent single, “We Used to Wait”. The interactive video incorporates visual data of your hometown using Google Maps, Street View, and a 3D graphics engine. The project, known as “The Wilderness Downtown”, takes you down memory lane through the streets you grew up in.

Stats show that every 4 seconds a woman has a baby. Our challenge is to find this woman and stop her.


Today’s Question: 1-in-6 teenagers surveyed is planning to quit Facebook because of THIS.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Their parents have joined.


Constant use will wear out anything … especially friends.

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