Friday, September 2, 2016 – Edition: #5810

Here’s Sheet in Your Eye!

★ The hit Netflix sci-fi series “Stranger Things” is coming back for a Season 2. Creators Matt & Ross Duffer are working on a total of 9 new episodes to be released in 2017. Set in the 1980s, the series follows a gang of 12-year-olds who stumble upon an alternate reality, a super-powered girl, a government conspiracy, as well as heaps & heaps of nostalgia.
★ Mel Gibson has confirmed there is going to be a “Passion Of the Christ” follow-up film. The 2004 movie, which starred Jim Caviezel as ‘The Messiah’, became the highest-grossing independent film of all-time, hauling in more than $600 million worldwide. The new movie is not “Passion 2”; it’s called “The Resurrection”. Gibson calls the project a “huge undertaking” and a “very big subject”. No timeline for production has yet been announced.
– “Hollywood Reporter”
★ ’90s kids rejoice! For the first time in nearly 20 years, quirky, bow-tied TV scientist Bill Nye is returning to the screen to host a new show announced by Netflix this week. The new series “Bill Nye Saves the World” is due to make its debut in early 2017. It will explore science and its influence on culture and society. Nye’s previous outing “Bill Nye The Science Guy” aired on PBS-TV and was syndicated to local stations from 1993-98.
★ And it seems cute celeb couple Chloë Grace Moretz & Brooklyn Beckham have split up. The 19-year-old “Kick-Ass” actress and 17-year-old model-son of David & Victoria Beckham first went public with their relationship in May after allegedly dating on-and-off for 2 years. A sulky-looking Brooklyn has now reportedly returned home to London after spending the Summer in LA with Chloë. An insider says they’ve called it quits for good.

• “America’s Got Talent” (NBC/CityTV) – Tonight semifinalists perform at LA’s Dolby Theatre.
• “Black Music Honors” (CW) – Saturday artists who have influenced and made contributions to African-American music are honored.
• Bumbershoot (Seattle WA) – The 3-day festival has Death Cab For Cutie, Fetty Wap, G-Eazy, Halsey, Macklemore & Ryan Lewis, Tame Impala, Third Eye Blind and many others.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Today Adele (“25”). Rerun.
• “Good Morning America (ABC) – This morning Jason Derulo (“Platinum Hits”) performs.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight Robert Randolph (“Lickety Split”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Tonight Anthrax (“Split EP”). Rerun.
• “Live With Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – Today Magic! (“Primary Colours”). Rerun.
• “Meredith Vieira” (syndicated) – Today Rick Springfield (“Rocket Science”). Rerun.
• “The Real” (syndicated) – Today guest co-host Mel B (Spice Girls) . Rerun.
• Made In America Festival (Philadelphia PA) – Saturday-Sunday Rihanna and Coldplay headline on Philly’s Benjamin Franklin Parkway. Also on the bill: A$AP Ferg, Chance the Rapper, DJ Khaled, Grimes, Lil Wayne, 2 Chainz and more.
• Riot Fest (Detroit MI) – On the bill Saturday-Sunday: Death Cab for Cutie, Deftones, Fitz & The Tantrums, The Flaming Lips, Jane’s Addiction, Sleater-Kinney, 2 Chainz and more.
• “Today Show” (NBC) – Today a live set from Alicia Keys (“Girl On Fire”).
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Today Martina McBride (“Reckless”). Rerun.

• Brad Paisley – Sunday he begins a series of free concerts with a new group of college partners. The 2016 Brad Paisley Country Nation College Tour begins in Orlando FL.
• Drake – This week he and Rihanna were all over each other during a night out at a Miami FL nightclub. So what was that awkward cheek-kiss at the MTV Video Music Awards all about?
• Pink Floyd – Beginning next May, London’s Victoria & Albert Museum is hosting a 50th anniversary retrospective of the band’s career. It features artifacts, a laser show, and previously unseen concert footage. You know you’re getting old when … you’re in a museum.
• Prince – Tonight-tomorrow his backing band The Revolution play 2 reunion shows at iconic music club First Avenue in Minneapolis MN. The venue is where scenes were shot for the late artist’s “Purple Rain” video back in 1984.
• Selena Gomez – is exclusively reporting that she actually has put her “Revival Tour” on hold after a secret intervention from family members concerned about her escalating drug use. The official story has been she’s suffering depression from lupus disease.
• Snoop Dogg – He’s partnering with Tanqueray Gin to oversee its new ad campaign. He’s helping create signature cocktail recipes, working on Tanqueray special events, and releasing exclusive content and art projects inspired by his 1993 track “Gin & Juice”.

• “The Light Between Oceans” ( PG-13 Romantic Drama ): Michael Fassbender & Alicia Vikander play a lighthouse keeper and his wife living off the coast of Western Australia, who raise a baby they rescue from an adrift rowboat. Co-stars Rachel Weisz. Based on the debut novel by ML Stedman. Both Vikander and Weisz are being touted for Oscar nominations.
• “Morgan” ( R-Rated Sci-Fi Thriller ): A corporate risk-management consultant must decide whether or not to terminate an artificially created humanoid being. Stars Kate Mara, with Anya Taylor-Joy, Michael Yare, Rose Leslie. Supporting cast includes Jennifer Jason Leigh and Paul Giamatti. The film’s trailers have been white-hot online, a sign this may be a sleeper hit.
• Opening in limited release: “The 9th Life of Louis Drax” (Mystery Thriller); “White Girl” (Drama); and “Yoga Hosers” (Comedy).

Do you have luxurious housing tastes on a studio apartment budget? You can now apply to work as a live-in housekeeping assistant for Britain’s Queen Elizabeth. In addition to normal cleaning tasks, the housekeeper is expected to care for carpets and furniture, historic vases, and irreplaceable paintings. She’ll also attend to guests and lend a helping hand during events. The salary isn’t great: £16,755 (circa $22,000) per year. However, there are some nice perks: 33 days vacation, an employer contribution pension plan, and benefits … as well as free meals and free rent. The position’s hours are full-time any 5 days of the week. The deadline for applications is September 18th. (Out-of-work “Downton Abbey” staff preferred.)
– “The Telegraph”

A new ranking based on estimated total earnings over the past year …
1. Gisele Bündchen … $30.5 million.
2. Adriana Lima … $10.5 million.
3. [tie] Kendall Jenner / Karlie Kloss … $10 million.
4. [tie] Gigi Hadid / Rosie Huntington-Whiteley … $9 million.
5. Cara Delevingne … $8.5 million.
6. [tie] Candice Swanepoel / Liu Wen … $7 million.
7. Miranda Kerr … $6 million.

At this week’s 2016 edition of ‘The Quail, A Motorsports Gathering’ in Carmel CA, Lamborghini unveiled its new $2-million Centenario model. With only 40 to be produced in total, it’s the most expensive and most powerful Lamborghini ever.

There’s a strong chance the most hated word in the English language is “moist”. (Runners-up?)
– BBC News


1948 [68] Terry Bradshaw, Shreveport LA, TV personality (“Better Late Than Never”)/sports analyst (“FOX NFL Sunday” since 1994)/NFL QB (4 Super Bowls-Pittsburgh Steelers 1970-83)/Pro Football Hall of Fame (1989)

1951 [65] Mark Harmon, Burbank CA, TV actor (‘Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs’ on “NCIS” since 2003)

1959 [57] Guy Laliberté, Québec City QC, founder & CEO of Cirque du Soleil (“Love”, “Viva Elvis”)/space tourist to International Space Station (2009)/estimated net worth $1.3 billion

1964 [52] Keanu Reeves, Beirut, Lebanon [raised Toronto ON], movie actor (“The Lake House”, “The Matrix” trilogy)

1966 [50] Salma Hayek, Coatzacoalcos, Mexico, movie actress (“Grown Ups”, “Frida”)

1989 [27] Zedd (Anton Zaslavski), Saratov, Russia, EDM DJ/producer (“Clarity”, f/Selena Gomez-“I Want You to Know”)

TV-movie actor Charlie Sheen (“Two-and-a-Half Men”) is 51; Pop singer-DJ-rapper Redfoo (LMFAO) is 41; Alt-rock guitarist Tomo Milicevic (30 Seconds to Mars) is 37; X Games athlete Shaun White is 30.

Rock guitarist Kim Thayil (Soundgarden) is 56; DJ/music producer Mark Ronson (“Uptown Funk”) is 41; TV actor Max Greenfield (“New Girl”) is 37; Pop singer Beyoncé (“Formation”) is 35; Country singer/guitarist Tom Gossin (Gloriana) is 35; Musician Neyla Pekarek (The Lumineers) is 30; Singer-songwriter James Bay (“Hold Back the River”) is 26.

• “Bring Your Manners to Work Day”, an annual reminder that good etiquette eases relationships in the workplace. What does a co-worker do that drives you round the bend?
• “Blueberry Popsicle Day”, a celebration of the flavor that leaves your lips and tongue looking like some kind of purple-fleshed alien.
• “Lazy Moms Day”, a day for hard-working moms to do whatever they want.
• “Pierce Your Ears Day”. At what age is it acceptable for a little twerp to have hers (his) done?
• “Wisconsin State Cow Chip Throw”, the 42nd annual 2-day competition in Sauk Prairie WI. No gloves are allowed, but licking your hands to get a better grip is OK.
• “World Championship Barbecue Goat Cook-Off” in Brady TX. It’s the 43rd annual, featuring some 125 teams trying to get your goat … to taste good.
• “World Testicle Cooking Championship” (aka “Ballscup”), a 13th annual 3-day weekend event in Rudnik, Serbia. The festival serves up a variety of testicles, including wildlife. Yummy.

• “Buffalo Wing Festival” in Buffalo NY, the 15th annual 2-day celebration of the local delicacy, highlighted by a series of Wing Eating Championships.
• “International Bacon Day”, the 16th annual on the Saturday before Labor Day that involves creating dishes containing bacon, including breakfasts, lunches, dinners, desserts, and drinks.
• “National Flag Day” in Australia, honoring the country’s national pennant picked in 1901.
• “Welsh Rarebit Day”, saluting the traditional dish that, explained simply, is melted cheese on bread. But anyone who’s had it knows it’s far more exotic than that, incorporating butter, flour, cheddar, dry mustard, Worcestershire sauce, Tabasco sauce, and – optionally – beer.
• “World Beard Day”, celebrated annually on the 1st Saturday of September when bearded people from every nation are encouraged to gather together with others and their beards. A few hairy facts …

• “Eat an Extra Dessert Day”, just because. Which would you pick to double-down on?
• “Fathers Day” in Australia and New Zealand, celebrated on the 1st Sunday in September.
• “Great Montana Sheep Drive” (aka “Running Of the Sheep”) in Reed Point MT, the 28th annual when hundreds of woolies charge down Main Street, then participate in the ‘Ugliest Sheep’ and ‘Prettiest Ewe Contest’.
• “Macadamia Nut Day”, saluting the yummy nut first found in the rainforests of eastern Australia thousands of years ago by aboriginals. Though they can be toxic to dogs, they are super nutritious for humans.
• “Newspaper Carrier Day”, celebrating the anniversary of the 1st recorded ‘news boy’, 10 year-old Barney Flaherty, who began hawking the “New York Sun” 183 years ago in 1833.

2003 [13] TV finalé of “Buffy, the Vampire Slayer”, starring Sarah Michelle Gellar

1995 [21] Country singer Reba McEntire makes history as her song “On My Own” becomes the first single shipped through cyberspace to country music radio stations

2005 [11] Kanye West sparks controversy during NBC-TV’s star-studded “Concert for Hurricane Relief” with his criticism of president George W Bush and the media’s portrayal of black and white victims of Hurricane Katrina

2012 [04] Ending a 50-year ban on veiled female news presenters, Egypt’s state television gives its female presenters a choice of wearing, or not wearing, a veil

2013 [03] At age 64, American Diana Nyad completes a record swim from Cuba to Florida, becoming the 1st to finish the 110-mile marathon without use of a shark cage for protection (as of this week, she can just take a JetBlue flight)

[Mon] Labor Day (Canada/USA)
[Mon] TV Choice Awards (London UK)
[Mon] Be Late For Something Day
[Mon] Ganesh Chaturthi (Hindu)
[Tues] “Ellen” season premiere (syndicated)
[Tues] Another Look Day
This Week Is … Nutrition Week
This Month Is … Be Kind to Editors & Writers Month


• How do you handcuff a one-armed person?
• Do pigs have pen pals?
• How come the ‘most popular people’ at school are the ones everybody hates?
• Is it possible for a psychic fair to be cancelled due to unforseen circumstances?
• Do dermatologists make rash decisions?
• If a turtle loses its shell, is it naked or homeless?
• Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
• Why is the third hand on a watch called a second hand?
• Why do we sing “Take me out to the ball game”, when we’re already there?
• Are golf balls as painful as athlete’s foot?

☎ Do you actually prefer hot dogs or hamburgers? What weird thing(s) do you put on ’em?

• The study of stupidity is called what?
a. Dunsology
b. Monology [CORRECT]
c. History

• What’s that little hole in the sink that lets water drain out instead of overflowing?
a. The emergency vent.
b. The porcelator. [CORRECT]
c. Always plugged.

Keep your nose to the grindstone and your shoulder to the wheel… it’s cheaper than plastic surgery.

Question: 1-in-4 of us have been late for work because of THIS.
Answer: Forgot phone and went back home to get it.

If it’s raining, this must be a weekend.

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