Tuesday, September 27, 2011        Edition: #4595
More From the Sheet House!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Former US prez Bill Clinton has confirmed he had an ‘interesting offer’ to appear on “Dancing With the Stars” (ABC) alongside the likes of Nancy Grace and Chaz Bono but declined because he ‘couldn’t fit dance training into a busy schedule’ (BS translation: I don’t rhumba) . . . It’s come to light that actor Sean Penn had a role in the release of those 2 American hikers held captive in Iran for 2 years, by asking Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez to intervene with Iranian leader Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (question yet to be asked of the hikers: how could you be so stupid as to go hiking on the Iraq-Iran border?) . . . A couple featured on the 1st season of the MTV reality show “16 & Pregnant” has lost their child and are facing criminal charges after officers serving a search warrant found their home at the Little Rock Air Force Base filled with ‘feces, flies and maggots’ (now they can appear on “Cops”) . . . Actress Farrah Fawcett’s cancer research foundation, established after her death in 2009, is under investigation for fraud, an action the charity’s president Alana Stewart has reportedly called ‘outrageous’ (while at her 7-billion-dollar villa in Tahiti) . . . Rare snaps of screen icon Marilyn Monroe’s first photoshoot will go under the hammer at a Florida auction later this year, in order to settle the debts of the photographer, Joseph Jasgur (we’re betting the 65-year-old pics will perform better than a savings account would have) . . . Former California gov Arnold Schwarzenegger has commissioned 3 larger-than-life-size bronze statues of himself, one of which has been shipped to his childhood home in Thal, Austria; the 2nd heading to Columbus OH, where the ‘Arnold Classic’ professional bodybuilding competition is held every year; and the 3rd statue he’ll reportedly keep for himself (to commemorate his acting ability) . . . And poor Taylor Lautner (“Twilight Saga”) – not only did his new movie “Abduction” tank, he’s also split from girlfriend/co-star Lily Collins (one critic says his acting’s so wooden, you get splinters sitting through his films).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Cody Simpson (“Coast to Coast”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Glen Campbell (“Ghost On the Canvas”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Wye Oak (“Civilian”).
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – Trombone Shorty (“For True”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – ‘Floyd Week’ continues with Pink Floyd’s Roger Waters performing “In the Flesh” from “The Wall” album with Foo Fighters.
• “Live With Regis & Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – Colbie Caillat (“All of You”).
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Gloria Estefan (“The Essential 3.0 Gloria Estefan”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Blink-182 – Today their 10-track comeback album “Neighborhoods” is out, their first release in 8 years. A deluxe version includes 3 bonus cuts.
• Bruno Mars – Today he releases “It Will Rain” exclusively via iTunes, the lead single for the upcoming “Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1” soundtrack.
• Chickenfoot – Today their 10-track new album “Chickenfoot III” is out.
• Elvis Presley – “Elvis 1956”, a new 5-disc box set is released today, featuring live and studio recordings, plus interviews from before he hit the big time, daydreaming about cars and girls and, one day, fame and family. Interview sample here …
NET: http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20528166,00.html
• Nirvana – For its 20th anniversary, their landmark album “Nevermind” is re-released in a variety of versions today, including a re-mastered CD/digital version, a 2-disc set including B-sides and demos, and a “Super Deluxe, Limited Edition” with an alternate mix, a 90-page book, and a CD/DVD of their 1991 Halloween gig in Seattle WA. A new website allows fans to contribute memorabilia …
NET: http://nevermind20.com/
• Pink Floyd – Today is the long-awaited release of their 14 re-mastered studio albums. There’s also a 16-CD “Discovery Studio Album Box Set” that includes all of them plus alternate takes and unreleased tracks ($179.98), and a 6-disc “Immersion Box Set” focused on “Dark Side Of the Moon” ($109.99), which includes previously unreleased audio and video. (“Dark Side of the Moon” is the longest-charted album in “Billboard” magazine ever, lasting 780 weeks … or 15 years.)
• Sting – Today he releases the 4-disc box set collection, “Sting: 25 Years”, featuring 45 re-mastered tracks. He’ll support the release with the “Back to Bass Tour” of North America, beginning in Boston MA October 21st.
• Switchfoot – “Vice Verses”, their 8th studio album is out today, mostly recorded in their San Diego CA home studio. Frontman Jon Foreman says it’s all about the ‘polarity of the human experience – the sunlight and shadow, highs and lows, laughter and pain, hope and fear’.

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “The Ledge” ( R-Rated Thriller ): Charlie Hunnam stars as a man who is lured to the ledge of a high-rise and told he has 1 hour to make a choice between his life or the one he loves … his neighbor’s wife (Liv Tyler). Co-stars Patrick Wilson and Terrence Howard.
• Also released today: “Army Wives: The Complete 5th Season” (TV); “Ben-Hur – 50th Anniversary Ultimate Collector’s Edition”; “The Cleveland Show: The Complete Season 2” (TV); “CSI – The 11th Season” (TV); “CSI: Miami – The 9th Season” (TV); “CSI: NY – The 7th Season” (TV); “Dawson’s Creek: The Complete Series” (Vintage TV); “Footloose – Deluxe Edition”; “How I Met Your Mother: Season 6” (TV); “The King of Queens: The Complete Series” (Vintage TV); “Law & Order: SVU – The 12th Year” (TV); “Married … With Children: The Complete Series (Vintage TV); and “The Middle: The Complete 2nd Season” (TV).

PULP NON-FICTION:
A chemistry professor from the UK’s University of York has figured out a method for turning orange peels, rind, and pith – the stuff left over when producing orange juice – into raw material for bio-fuel. And there’s no shortage of the stuff. In Brazil, the world’s largest producer of orange juice, half the fruit is left over as waste once the juice has been recovered. That entails 3 million tonnes annually that could be used to produce chemicals, materials, and fuels. The research partnership has now been dubbed the ‘Orange Peel Exploitation Company’, aka … ‘OPEC’. (Brilliant!)
– CBC.ca

SIGNS YOU COULD BE GETTING CANNED:
According to Martha Finney, career expert and author of “Money With Meaning: 42 Practical Ways to Discover Your Calling & Land Your Dream Job Now”, these are some indicators that the axe may be about to fall and what you can do about it …
• New Blood – If your company has recently changed ownership and there’s now someone who does the exact same thing you do, you could be in trouble. Schedule a meeting with your boss to express your concerns. At the very least, he or she may be able to give you a heads up that your days are numbered, allowing you to get started on a job search ASAP.
• You’ve Made a Major Mistake – Your best bet is to take on the role of strategic partner by asking your boss what you can do to mitigate the damage quickly. Most higher-ups want to see you do well, and are willing to mentor you through a screw-up, no matter how colossal.
• Your Assignments are Dwindling – If you notice that responsibility is slowly being taken away from you, talk to your boss about it. Be frank and tell them you’ve noticed your role dwindling and would like to stay an integral part of the team.
– Condensed from “Cosmopolitan”

THE CHICKEN WHISPERER:
Jennifer Murtoff of Chicago, Illinois has a part-time job as an ‘urban chicken consultant’. So far she’s taught over 230 urban clients how to build a chicken coop, how to spot a sick bird, and what to do if they want to turn their daily egg supplier into a homemade bucket of drumsticks and wings. She thinks the trend toward urban chicken-raising is due to the economy, and it’s also nice to have a bird in your backyard that can give you breakfast. There are currently only 6 Canadian cities where backyard chickens are legal: Brampton, Guelph, and Niagara Falls in Ontario, and Surrey, Victoria, and Vancouver in BC. (And you thought the barking dog next door was annoying!)
– “The Atlantic”

HOW TO WHITEN CLOTHES WITHOUT USING BLEACH:
• Let your clothes soak in a basin of hot water and lemon slices for 1-to-2 hours, then wash as usual. If clothes are particularly dingy, boil the water, turn off the heat, add your clothing and lemon slices, and soak overnight.
• White vinegar works well, too. Pour a half-cup to 1 cup (250 ml) into the wash with detergent. It will whiten, help wash away detergent or soap residue, and soften the fabric.
• One more idea: the old-fashioned power of sunlight helps brighten whites and gives them that wonderful outdoor scent.
– “Traditional Wisdom Rediscovered”

FOR THE RECORD:
• The Umewaka Restaurant in Anjo City, Japan offers the ‘World’s Largest Sushi Roll’ on its regular menu. The giant futomaki roll is called the ‘Generous Roll’ and contains 24 tasty ingredients. But to be served the massive 6-kilo (13.2-lb) monster, you’ll have to place your order 2 days in advance. It costs circa $197 … but at least you’ll walk (roll?) away full.
– OddityCentral.com
• The Eh-hausl (‘Little Wedding House’) in Amberg, Germany bills itself as the ‘Smallest Hotel in the World’ at only 2.4 meters (8 feet) wide. The structure was built in 1728 between 2 other houses. In 2008, it was transformed into a luxury hotel. Total size? 56 square meters (600 sq ft). Maximum number of guests? Two.
NET: http://www.ehehaeusl.de/index3.html
– MetaFilter.com

BS AMAZING FACTS:
• Red-haired donors are being turned away by the world’s largest sperm bank, Cryos International in Denmark, because there is a lack of demand for their ‘product’. (Gingers unite! You’re going to be extinct!)
– BBC News
• Yawning cools down the brain. Researchers at Princeton University & the University of Arizona have found we’re more likely to yawn in the wintertime, since the temperature of the outside air is cooler than our internal body temp. (The way things look this morning, there’s a lot of chilly gray matter in the studio!)
– HuffingtonPost.com

BS CHRONOMETER 09.27.11

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1943 [68] Randy Bachman (‘BACK-man’ not ‘BOCK-man’), Winnipeg MB, classic rock musician (BTO-“Takin’ Care of Business”, Guess Who-“American Woman”)

1947 [64] Meat Loaf (Marvin Lee Aday), Dallas TX, classic rock singer (“I’d Do Anything For Love”, “Two Out of Three Ain’t Bad”)/sometime movie actor (“Fight Club”, “The Rocky Horror Picture Show”)

1964 [47] Stephan Jenkins, Oakland CA, rock singer (Third Eye Blind-“How’s It Going to Be”, “Jumper”)

1972 [39] Gwyneth Paltrow, LA CA, movie actress (“Iron Man” movies, 1999 Oscar-“Shakespeare in Love”)/Mrs Chris Martin (Coldplay) since 2003

1978 [33] Brad Arnold, Escatawpa MS, pop singer (3 Doors Down-“Here Without You”, “When I’m Gone”)

1982 [29] Lil’ Wayne (Dwayne Carter Jr), New Orleans LA, rapper (“How to Love”, “Lollipop”)

1984 [27] Avril Lavigne, Napanee ON, pop singer (“Girlfriend”, “Complicated”)/Mrs Deryck Whibley (Sum 41) 2006-09

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Ancestor Appreciation Day”, a day to learn about and appreciate one’s forebears. (Hey, without them, we wouldn’t be here!)

• “Shut Up and Let Somebody Else Talk Day”. Yeah you … you know who you are.

• “St Vincent de Paul Day”, honoring the Roman Catholic priest dedicated to serving the poor, who died on this date in 1660. (The patron saint of used clothing?)

• “World Tourism Day”, as declared by the UN’s World Tourism Organization.
NET: http://unwto.org

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1954 [57] After 15 months on late-night local NYC TV, “The Tonight Show” debuts on NBC-TV, hosted by Steve Allen (later hosts include Jack Paar, Johnny Carson, and Jay Leno)

2004 [07] NBC-TV announces “The Tonight Show” host Jay Leno will be succeeded by “Late Night” host Conan O’Brien in 2009 (what a great idea that turns out to be!)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2004 [07] Legendary music producer Phil Spector is indicted for the 2003 murder of actress Lana Clarkson at his estate in Alhambra CA

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1881 [130] Major League Baseball records it’s all-time ‘Smallest Crowd’ (an intimate gathering of 12 fans shows up to watch the Chicago White Stockings beat the Troy Trojans 10-8 in a rainstorm)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] Elton John’s “The Million Dollar Piano” show debuts (Las Vegas)
[Wed] Season debuts of “Suburgatory” (ABC/CityTV); “Happy Endings” (ABC/CityTV)
[Wed] Fish Tank Floorshow Night
[Wed] Rosh Hashanah (Jewish)
[Thurs] World Heart Day
[Thurs] Coffee Day
[Thurs] Women’s Health & Fitness Day
[Thurs] 44th International Bluegrass Awards (Nashville TN)
This Week Is … Banned Books Week
This Month Is … Hispanic Heritage Month (September 15-October 15)

BULL’S BITS

BS SIGNS YOU’VE GONE TO A BAD HYPNOTIST:
• He tells you your wallet is blocking the alpha rays … better let him hold it .
• He says, “You are getting very … uh … slippery – no, that’s not it.”
• Anytime someone says the word ‘hello’, you find yourself naked in Nantucket.
• When you come to, he’s wearing your clothes.
• Everywhere you look … giant, whistling squirrels.

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
• What are the 2 main flavors in original bubble gum?
a. Spearmint & clove.
b. Wintergreen & vanilla. [CORRECT]
c. Salt & vinegar.
– Halife.com

• Which professional athletes enjoy the longest careers on average?
a. Baseball Players [CORRECT. 4.5 years; basketball 4 years; football 3.5 years.]
b. Basketball Players
c. Football Players
– “Men’s Health”

BS PHONE STARTER:
What did you get into trouble for the most when you were young?

BS RANDOM JOKE:
I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: In a survey of children, THIS ranks as their #1 favorite food.
Answer: Spaghetti.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
The relative values of health and wealth depend entirely on which one you have left.