Thursday, September 27, 2012        Edition: #4839

More From the Sheet House!

Latest rumored show biz couple is Simon Cowell & Carmen Electra, who’ve been recently spotted ‘holding hands and staring into each other’s eyes’ at a restaurant in West Hollywood (he met her by hiring her as a judge on “Britain’s Got Talent”) . . . Another rumored odd couple spotted together: “Family Guy” creator Seth MacFarlane and “Game of Thrones” actress Emilia Clarke (she musta been drunk – or lost her contacts) . . . Actress Kristen Stewart has just been named the celebrity with the ‘Most Searched-For Style’ by a British-based fashion website, knocking Pippa Middleton out of top spot (seems fake pistols are now passé) . . . Gay-focused TV network Logo has now shelved a planned documentary about Paris Hilton following her recent controversial comments about AIDS (most of us ‘shelved’ her long ago) . . . Sarah Jessica Parker is guest-starring in an upcoming episode of “Glee” (FOX), playing a “Vogue” magazine editor (this show’s supposed to be about high school?) . . . Troubled actress Amanda Bynes excuse for skipping her recent court date – she’s moved to NYC to start a fashion line (it’s going to feature a lot of horizontal stripes) . . . Acting couple Bradley Cooper & Zoe Saldana are back together thanks to his mother Gloria, who apparently adores her (yup, he’s a 37-year-old mommy’s boy) . . . Proud new mama Nicole ‘Snooki’ Polizzi (“Jersey Shore”) is already back in partying shape, showing off her post-baby bod’ in an Instagram photo less than a month after giving birth to son Lorenzo (let’s be really honest – she wasn’t skinny beforehand) . . . And famous felon Lindsay Lohan has been hospitalized for something other than exhaustion (BS translation: Dope), as she’s apparently suffered a lung infection (that’s what happens when you spend the night partying in the rain, hon’).

• “The Big Bang Theory” (CBS) – 6th season debut.
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – The Chevin (“Borderland”).
• “Elementary” (CBS) – Series debut of this re-imagination of Sherlock Holmes as a modern detective living in NYC. Stars Jonny Lee Miller, and Lucy Liu as ‘Dr Watson’.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Green Day, pre-recorded before rehab (“Uno”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Tony Bennet (“Duets 2”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Chairlift (“Does You Inspire You”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – Lupe Fiasco (“Food & Liquor II: The Great American Rap”); Neil Young (“Psychedelic Pill”, coming October 30th).
• “Person of Interest” (CBS) – 2nd season debut.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Gaslight Anthem (“Handwritten”).
• “Two-And-a-Half Men” (CBS/CTV) – 10th season premiere features guest star Michael Bolton.

• Beach Boys – 71-year-old frontman Mike Love, who owns the rights to the band’s name, has released a statement saying he will not tour with Brian Wilson, Al Jardine, and David Marks beyond the band’s UK tour dates this week. They’ll be replaced by the group’s long-serving backup band, which includes Love’s son Christian.
• Carrie Underwood – Talk about a softy! She actually took an injured chipmunk to a veterinarian after her dog Ace tried to eat it. The critter, which she’s dubbed Dale (as in “Chip and …”), is now doing fine and will be released back into the wild.
• Coldplay – They’ll release “Live 2012” on November 20th, their first concert film/live album in 9 years. It features footage from their “Mylo Xyloto World Tour” recorded at Paris’s Stade de France, Montréal’s Bell Centre, and the UK’s Glastonbury Festival.
• Elton John – He & partner David Furnish have sold their Hollywood home after deciding it wasn’t suitable for 21-month-old son Zachary due to it being ‘dangerously high up’. The adjoining condos in West Hollywood’s Sierra Tower went for $4.65 million.
• Joss Stone – Tonight she begins a North American tour in support of her new album, “The Soul Sessions Vol 2”, in Vancouver BC.
• Katy Perry – She’s been announced as “Billboard’s” ‘Woman Of the Year 2012’. Why? She’s the first artist to have 5 songs sell over 5 million digital copies, she released the 3-D concert film “Part Of Me”, played plenty of live dates, and is also reportedly setting up her own record label.
• Madonna – She now says she was being ‘ironic’ at her Monday show in Washington DC when she commented “We have a black Muslim in the White House” during an ‘endorsement’ for Obama’s re-election. She’s now issued a statement saying “Yes, I know Obama is not a Muslim … the point I was making is that a good man is a good man, no matter who he prays to.”
• Muse – They say their new track “Supremacy” would have been perfect to use over the opening credits of the new ‘James Bond’ film. But that’s not going to happen. The titular theme “Skyfall”, sung by Adele, is expected to be released next week.
• One Direction – Liam Payne has reportedly split from his dancer-girlfriend Danielle Peazer. They’d been dating since they met during his time on the British “X Factor” in 2010.

A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “Grace of Monaco” – In this upcoming bio-film, Nicole Kidman stars as actress-turned-princess Grace Kelly. Brit actor Roger Ashton-Griffiths will play famed director Alfred Hitchcock, who worked with Kelly in 3 films and tries to get her to come out of retirement to star in his new movie. The film is due in theaters sometime in 2014.
• “Homefront” – Sylvester Stallone penned the script for this upcoming action-thriller starring Jason Statham, James Franco, Frank Grillo, and Winona Ryder. The pic revolves around an ex-DEA agent (Statham) who moves his family to a seemingly quiet town that turns out to be rife with violence, drug traffickers, and a meth magnate (Franco). It’s due to hit theaters in 2013.
• “Jennifer Lopez: Dance Again” – Shooting during her current world tour at stops in Europe, Asia, and Australia, this ‘high-energy documentary’ will combine 3-D concert performances with 2-D documentary content, which will follow her personal and professional life. Producers hope to capture the raw day-to-day life of J-Lo as a performer, businesswoman, and mother.
• “Robocalypse” – Anne Hathaway & Chris Hemsworth are in negotiations to star in Steven Spielberg’s new sci-fi action flick that sees future humanity battling for survival against a horde of robots of its own creation. Based on the sci-fi novel by Daniel H Wilson, it will be Spielberg’s first return to the genre since “War Of the Worlds” (2005). The new film’s due in 2014.
• “Rollin’ Thunder” – This upcoming comedy is set in the world of hip-hop in Atlanta, Georgia. It centers on an ex-con and former bowling champ who sees a city-wide bowling tournament as his chance to get back into the game, prove his innocence, and mend bridges with his estranged teenaged daughter. No casting has been announced as yet.

Today ‘Harry Potter’ author JK Rowling publishes “The Casual Vacancy”, her first novel aimed at an adult audience. The 512-page book, touted as ‘a big novel about a small town’, is set in a seemingly idyllic English village called ‘Pagford’ and centers around a parish council election following the shocking death of one of its members in his early 40s. The publisher describes it as a ‘blackly comic, thought-provoking and constantly surprising story’. It’s a radical change for Rowling, whose ‘Harry Potter’ novels became a global publishing phenomenon, selling an estimated 450 million copies. (Brilliant targeting actually … her ‘earliest ‘Potter’ fans are now 20-something adults.)
– “The Guardian”

According to a new global well-being survey from Gallup …
5. (tie) Israel / New Zealand … 63%
4. (tie) Finland / Venezuela … 64%
3. Australia … 66%
2. (tie) Canada / Sweden … 69%
1. Denmark … 72%
Least happiest place on Earth? The African country of Chad … 1%.

How easy would it be for a thief to guess your 4-digit PIN? Forced to pick randomly, the odds of getting the correct number would be 1-in-10,000. However, researchers at data analysis firm DataGenetics have found that the 3 most popular combinations – 1234, 1111, and 0000 – account for close to 20% of all 4-digit passwords. Every 4-digit combination that starts with 19 ranks above the 80th percentile in popularity. The least popular combination – 8068 – appears less than 0.001% of the time (you probably shouldn’t choose that now that it’s public information). Others that are nearly as rare include 8093, 9629, 8835, and 7637. (A totally random number’s best … but how do you remember it?)
– Bloomberg News

Next time you notice your date has a crappy sense of smell, you might want to look out. A new study has found that people who can’t smell very well are more likely to be … psychopaths. The study from Australia’s Macquarie University tested non-criminal psychopaths (people who lack empathy for others, are antisocial and insensitive) and found them consistently worse at identifying smells and telling them apart from other scents. Researchers think the area of the brain responsible for processing odors is also linked to the area that helps control impulses and regulates behavior. So if something isn’t working right in that area of the brain, it can affect the way someone reacts to social situations as well as how they smell. (The exception to the rule: Co-host is a psycho and really smells.)
– Condensed from “Cosmopolitan”

Seeking to reduce civilian casualties and collateral damage, the Pentagon will soon deploy a new generation of drones the size of model planes, packing tiny explosive warheads that can be delivered with pinpoint accuracy. Errant drone strikes have been blamed for killing and injuring scores of civilians throughout Pakistan and Afghanistan. The Predator and Reaper drones deployed in these regions typically carry 100-lb (45-kg) laser-guided Hellfire missiles or 500-lb (227-kg) GPS-guided smart bombs that can reduce buildings to smouldering rubble. The new Switchblade drone, by comparison, weighs less than 6 lbs (2.7 kg) and can take out a sniper on a rooftop without blasting the building to bits. (The world of the future: Pristine buildings … no people.)
– “Los Angeles Times”

In a lifetime, the average driver will honk the horn 15,250 times.


1943 [69] Randy Bachman (‘BACK-man’ not ‘BOCK-man’), Winnipeg MB, classic rock musician (BTO-“Takin’ Care of Business”, Guess Who-“American Woman”)/Canada’s Walk of Fame (2012)

1947 [65] Meat Loaf (Marvin Lee Aday), Dallas TX, classic rock singer (“I’d Do Anything For Love”, “Two Out of Three Ain’t Bad”)/sometime movie actor (“Fight Club”, “Rocky Horror Picture Show”)

1964 [48] Stephan Jenkins, Oakland CA, rock singer (Third Eye Blind-“How’s It Going to Be”, “Jumper”)

1972 [40] Gwyneth Paltrow, LA CA, movie actress (“Iron Man” movies, “Shakespeare in Love”)/Mrs Chris Martin (Coldplay) since 2003

1978 [34] Brad Arnold, Escatawpa MS, pop singer (3 Doors Down-“Here Without You”, “When I’m Gone”)

1982 [30] Lil’ Wayne (Dwayne Carter Jr), New Orleans LA, rapper (“How to Love”, “Lollipop”)

1984 [28] Avril Lavigne, Napanee ON, pop singer (“Girlfriend”, “Complicated”)/Mrs Deryck Whibley (Sum 41) 2006-09/currently engaged to Nickelback frontman Chad Kroeger

• “Ancestor Appreciation Day”, a day to learn about and appreciate one’s forebears. (Hey, without them, we wouldn’t be here!)

• “Shut Up and Let Somebody Else Talk Day”. Yeah you … you know who you are.

• “St Vincent de Paul Day”, honoring the Roman Catholic priest dedicated to serving the poor, who died on this date in 1660. (The patron saint of used clothing?)

• “World Maritime Day”, an annual observance of the International Maritime Organization. The theme for 2012 is ‘100 Years After the Titanic’, which focuses on the organization’s roots and raison d’être … safety at sea.

• “World Tourism Day”, as declared by the UN’s World Tourism Organization. The 2012 theme: ‘Tourism & Sustained Energy’.

1954 [58] “The Tonight Show” debuts on NBC-TV, hosted by Steve Allen (later hosts include Jack Paar, Johnny Carson, Jay Leno, Conan O’Brien, and Jay Leno again)

2004 [08] Legendary music producer Phil Spector is indicted for the 2003 murder of actress Lana Clarkson at his estate in Alhambra, California

1881 [131] Major League Baseball records it’s all-time ‘Smallest Crowd’ (an intimate gathering of 12 fans shows up to watch the Chicago White Stockings beat the Troy Trojans 10-8 in a rainstorm)

[Fri] “Hotel Transylvania”; “Looper”; “Won’t Back Down” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Hug a Vegetarian Day
[Fri] Walk to Work Day
[Fri] Ask a Stupid Question Day
[Sat] Full ‘Harvest’ Moon
[Sun] “Homeland” Season 2 debut (SHOW)
[Sun] Drummer Appreciation Day
This Week Is … Banned Books Week
This Month Is … Hispanic Heritage Month (September 15-October 15)


• Your mother wrapped things in waxed paper, not plastic wrap.
• The first bathing suit you had as a girl had a skirt on it.
• You remember using the terms ‘acid rock’, ‘killer weed’, and ‘hip joint’. Without laughing.
• You were once caught reading “Hustler” magazine. Well maybe not reading.
• Your parents constantly reprimanded you to ‘get a haircut’.
• Winding your watch was the first thing you used to do in the morning.
• You ever used a ‘roller skate key’.
• You ‘necked’ when you were in high school, which didn’t require any special equipment.

• What is the largest desert in Europe?
a. Gobi.
b. Goober.
c. There aren’t any, moron! [CORRECT. Europe is the only continent without a desert.]

☎ Which is the ultimate all-time horror villain from the movies?

She dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.

Question: According to a new study, both men and women find THESE a little threatening.
Answer: Beards.

If you’re the best in your class you’re in the wrong class.

Monthly Planning Calendar in Tomorrow’s “BS”!

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