Friday, September 6, 2013        Edition: #5063


✶ Khloe Kardashian’s husband Lamar Odom has checked into an unspecified rehab facility for drug & alcohol abuse following rumors his 4-year marriage is on the rocks. An inside source says the 32-year-old NBA basketball player finally ‘realized he needs help’. The news comes just a week after his August 30th arrest for DUI, when he subsequently had his driver’s licence suspended for refusing a sobriety test. (Another smart move!)
✶ The casting of the “Fifty Shades of Grey” movie with relatively unknown actors Charlie Hunnam & Dakota Johnson is attracting a lot of flak. Fans of EL James’ novel have even started a petition to get a re-cast. In fairness, producers had to deal with a host of stars turning down the controversial roles. Considered for ‘Anastasia Steele’: Alicia Vikander, Elizabeth Olsen, Emma Watson, Imogen Poots, and Shailene Woodley. And for ‘Christian Grey’: Channing Tatum, Garrett Hedlund, Ryan Gosling, and Michael Fassbender. The movie is scheduled to hit cinemas on August 1, 2014. (A who’s who of Hollywood are not in this movie.)
✶ Britain’s Prince Harry will be locked in a freezing cold chamber for 24 hours ahead of his challenge to reach the South Pole. The 28-year-old prince will experience simulated blizzards and icy temperatures as he and his teammates test their equipment for the upcoming “Walking With the Wounded South Pole Allied Challenge” in November. Harry and actor Dominic West (ex-“The Wire”) are leading teams of wounded troops on a 208-mi (335-km) trek across Antarctica for the charity. (They could get better practice with a visit to Winnipeg in October.)
✶ And word has it 76-year-old screen icon Jack Nicholson has retired, due to memory loss and other health concerns related to age. He’s said to have struggled remembering movie lines, the reason he’s shied away from any roles since 2010’s “How Do You Know”. After more than a half-century of work, the 3-time Oscar winner has apparently quietly walked away from the movie industry, although there’s been no official word from Nicholson himself. (What’s his best-ever film? “The Shining”? Naw, we say 1975’s “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest”.)

• “Bestival 2013” (Isle of Wight UK) – The line-up for this weekend’s annual music bash at Robin Hill Country Park includes Elton John, Flaming Lips, Franz Ferdinand, MIA, Snoop Lion, and about a hundred more.
• “Boston Calling Music Festival” (Boston MA) – The Memorial Day original was such a success, the event’s back for an encore this Saturday-Sunday at City Hall Plaza. On the bill: Airborne Toxic Event, Kendrick Lamar, Passion Pit, Vampire Weekend and others.
• “CCMA Awards” (CBC) – Sunday the 2013 Canadian Country Music Association Awards live from Rexall Place in Edmonton AB. Gord Bamford leads nominations with 7; Dean Brody has 6. Performers include The Band Perry, Dallas Smith, Emerson Drive, and Hunter Hayes.
• “Chelsea Lately” (E!) – Tonight Kendrick Lamar (“Good Kid, MAAD City”). Rerun.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Today P!nk (“The Truth About Love”). Rerun.
• “Good Morning America” (ABC) – This morning Katy Perry (“Prism”, out October 22nd).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight Celine Dion performs “Loved Me Back to Life”, title track from her 1st album in 6 years, out November 5th).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight ZZ Ward (“Til the Casket Drops”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – Tonight The Wild Feathers (“The Wild Feathers”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Tonight New Politics (“New Politics”); Tamar Braxton (“Love & War”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – Tonight Laura Mvula (“Sing To the Moon”).
• “Live With Kelly & Michael” (ABC/CTV) – Today John Legend (“Love In the Future”).
• LouFest (St Louis MO) – Saturday-Sunday the annual event returns to Central Field in Forest Park with performances by Alabama Shakes, Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeroes, Fitz & The Tantrums, The Killers, The National, Wilco and more.
• Rock the Bells – This weekend the 10th annual touring hip-hop festival gets underway in San Bernardino CA with Big Krit, Common, Kid Cudi, Talib Kweli, Wu-Tang Clan, and several late rappers appearing as holograms. The trek wraps in Rutherford NJ October 4-5.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC/Global) – Bruno Mars (“Unorthodox Jukebox”) hosts and performs. Rerun.
• “Sunday Night Football” (NBC) – Carrie Underwood replaces Faith Hill on the show’s opening theme, “Waiting All Day for Sunday Night”, prior to the NY Giants @ Dallas Cowboys game. A preview clip of Carrie’s version here …
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Tonight American Authors (“American Authors”).

• Arctic Monkeys – Their new album “AM”, their 5th studio effort, is available to stream in it’s entirety on iTunes before it is officially released (September 10th).
• Avenged Sevenfold – Their 6th studio album, “Hail To the King”, has debuted at #1 on the album sales chart according to Nielsen SoundScan.
• Jay Z – Saturday at the Toronto International Film Festival, director Ron Howard’s documentary about the 2012 “Made In America” music festival in Philadelphia PA premieres. The festival was curated by Jay Z, who headlined the 1st night.
• Keith Urban – Tonight he celebrates the release of his 7th studio album, “Fuse”, with an album pre-release party and his first-ever live digital performance in Nashville TN. The show is being live-streamed via Yahoo! Music’s “Ram Country Live!”.
• Lady Gaga – She’s in talks with “Saturday Night Live” to host and perform in an upcoming episode, according to “TV Line”. She’s been on the show before, in 2009 and 2011 when she performed and appeared in skits alongside Ryan Reynolds and Justin Timberlake.
• Mumford & Sons – This weekend their 2013 series of “Gentlemen Of the Road Stopovers” in the UK, US, and Canada comes to Guthrie OK. Also appearing: Alabama Shakes, Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros, The Vaccines.
• Scotty McCreery – Tonight his “Weekend Road Trip Tour 2013” begins in Madera CA. He only tours weekends because he just began his sophomore year at North Carolina State University.
• U2 – Bassist Adam Clayton wed Brazilian model Mariana Teixeira in a low-key ceremony at a Dublin, Ireland registry office on Wednesday. The newlyweds will be celebrating the nuptials with a 3-day reception for 150 guests in France this weekend.
• The Weeknd – Tonight-tomorrow the Canadian buzz artist (real name Abel Tesfaye) begins a 28-date tour in Vancouver BC, then covers much of the USA before wrapping in Toronto October 17-20. His new album “Kiss Land” is out Tuesday.

• “Riddick” ( R-Rated Sci-Fi Thriller ): In this 3rd instalment in the franchise, ‘Riddick’ finds himself up against an alien race of predators after being left for dead on a sun-scorched planet. That’s when he activates an emergency beacon that alerts a ship carrying a new breed of mercenaries. Co-stars Karl Urban, Katee Sackhoff, Jordi Mollà.
• Opening in limited release: “Good Ol’ Freda” (Documentary);  “Populaire” (Comedy); “Salinger” (Documentary); “Touchy Feely” (Drama); and “The Ultimate Life” (Drama).

Fashion’s cheekiest new craze leaves little to the imagination. In short-shorts and revealing rompers, the leggiest ladies are showing what the cool kids call ‘underbutt’, by revealing the oft-covered area where the thigh meets the glute. Celebs from Miley Cyrus to Rumer Willis have been spotted sporting underbutt. Like its predecessors ‘sideboob’ and ‘sidebutt’ (here’s to you, Gwyneth Paltrow!), underbutt quickly went from red carpet faux pas to street style du jour. (Not all it’s cracked up to be if you ask us.)

THE 2013 ‘CELEBRITY 100’:
Annual ranking of most powerful celebs based on income & influence over the past year …
5. Madonna – After a 2-year absence, she’s 2013’s biggest earner with $125 million.
4. Beyoncé – A world tour and millions earned shilling for Pepsi and H&M.
3. Steven Spielberg – Climbs 7 slots from last year thanks to the success of “Lincoln”.
2. Lady Gaga – Even with a hip injury, she managed to rake in $80 million.
1. Oprah Winfrey – Tops the list for the 5th time, thanks to the resurgence of TV netlet OWN..

Can zombies be the stuff of serious academic study? In what’s claimed to be the biggest-ever experiment in ‘edutainment’, AMC television and the University of California @ Irvine are partnering to produce an online course linked to hit TV show “The Walking Dead”. Administrators setting up the course claim it will be academically rigorous and tackle ‘serious scientific issues’ related to events in the show. The 8-module course beginning in mid-October will be accessible without charge to anyone with an Internet connection. (The first new twist in TV promotion since guerrilla marketing.)
– BBC Entertainment

Highlights from the new entries in the latest edition of the “Guinness Book of World Records” …
✶ Betty White – The 91-year-old is cited for longest TV career (since 1949).
✶ Calvin Harris – Most top 10 hits from a single album (9), beating Michael Jackson’s previous record (7).
✶ “Doctor Who” – Longest running sci-fi show on TV (50 years, since 1963).
✶ One Direction – Highest US debut by a British group (“Live While We’re Young” at #3).
✶ Psy – Most-viewed video online in 24 hours (38 million views for the “Gangnam Style” follow-up “Gentleman”.).
✶ Richard Branson – Oldest person to cross the English Channel by kiteboard.
✶ Taylor Swift – 1st female artist with 2 million-selling weeks on the “Billboard 200” album chart (“Speak Now”, “Red”). And fastest-selling digital single (“We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”), reaching #1 on iTunes 50 minutes after release.

The North American box office hit a record $4.7 billion over Summer 2013, a 10.2% increase from last year. “Iron Man 3” was the biggest Summer hit, “The Lone Ranger” the biggest flop. A portion of the record revenues can be attributed to higher ticket prices (up an average 27¢); the packed roster of films also padded the total.
– Associated Press


1943 [70] Roger Waters, Cambridge UK, classic rock singer-bassist (Pink Floyd-“Another Brick In the Wall”)

1958 [55] Jeff Foxworthy, Atlanta GA, TV host (“Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?” 2007-11)/stand-up comedian (“You Might Be a Redneck If …”)

1967 [46] William DuVall, Washington DC, alt-rock vocalist-guitarist (Alice in Chains-“Your Decision”, “Check My Brain”)

1967 [46] Macy Gray (Natalie McIntyre), Canton OH, pop singer (“Beauty In the World”, “I Try”)

1971 [42] Dolores O’Riordan, Ballybricken, Ireland, alt-rock singer (The Cranberries-“Linger”)

1972 [41] Idris Elba, London UK, TV actor (“Luther” since 2010, “The Wire” 2002-04)/movie actor (“Prometheus”, “Thor”)  COMING UP: “Thor: The Dark World”, opening November 8th.

1983 [30] Pippa (Philippa) Middleton, Reading UK, British socialite/sister of Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge/professional hottie

1988 [25] Max George, Manchester UK, boy-band singer (The Wanted-“Glad You Came”, “All Time Low”)

Voice actress Julie Kavner (“The Simpsons”) is 62; TV actor Oliver Hudson (“Rules Of Engagement”) is 37; Movie actress Evan Rachel Wood (“The Wrestler”) is 26.

TV personality Brooke Burke (“Dancing With the Stars”) is 42; Movie actor David Arquette (“Scream”) is 42; Rock drummer Richard Hughes (Keane) is 38; Pop singer P!nk (“Get the Party Started”) is 34; Rapper Wiz Khalifa (“Black & Yellow”) is 26.

• “Fight Procrastination Day – Do It! Day”, a backlash to yesterday’s “Be Late For Something Day”.
• “Lazy Moms Day”, a day for hard-working moms to do whatever they want.
• “One Arm Dove Hunt”, the 42nd annual 2-day event in Olney, Texas that’s open to anyone who has the use of only one arm or hand. Additional events include the ‘Glove Swap’, ‘One Arm Jokes’, and ‘One Arm Golf’. You’ve got to hand it to them … they’ve got a sense of humor.

• “Salami Day”, started in 2006 by the Salami Appreciation Society to honor the cured Italian sausage that is fermented and air-dried. (Erp!)

• “Grandparents’ Day”, originated in 1978 to honor the folks who get to spoil our kids rotten without paying any consequences. Observed annually the 1st Sunday after Labor Day.
• “Hug Your Hound Day”, observed annually on the 2nd Sunday of September to encourage awareness of the need for both human-friendly and dog-friendly use of urban spaces.
• “International Literacy Day”, established by the UN in 1965 to promote reading & writing programs. Worldwide 1-in-5 adults (about 775 million) are illiterate.
• “Nose Hair Maintenance Day”, your annual opportunity to take proper care of nose hair by trimming, styling, brushing or some such thing. (Wait a sec … once a year?)
• “Pet Memorial Day”, sponsored by the International Association of Pet Cemeteries on the 2nd Sunday of September to remember departed dogs or perished parakeets and ponder their importance to the family.
• “World Physical Therapy Day”, initiated in 1951 to recognize the work that physical therapists do for their patients and their community.

1997 [16] Some 2.5 billion TV viewers worldwide watch Princess Diana’s funeral at London’s Westminster Abbey

1988 [25] Elton John famously declares that he will never wear his trademark outrageous costumes again, auctioning off 2,000 pieces of wardrobe at Sotheby’s in London

2003 [10] Rockford College Regents beat Trinity Bible College Lions 105-0, setting a new NCAA Division III football scoring record

[Mon] Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders Day
[Mon] Boss/Employee Exchange Day
[Mon] Wonderful Weirdos Day
[Tues] Swap Ideas Day
This Week Is … Waffle Week
This Month Is … Bed Check Month


• Play-Doh and microwave should never be used in the same sentence.
• You should never inhale deeply while cleaning blackboard brushes.
• Marbles in the gas tank make the school bus sound really noisy.
• Never sit next to the kid who mastered ventriloquism over the Summer.
• You can eat the white school paste. You can NOT eat the Super Glue.
• Your mom apparently spent hundreds-of-dollars on what appear to be last year’s fashions.
• The phrase was actually, “Cheaters never perspire”.
• Teachers can be broken.

☎ Where have you come across a ‘placebo button’, a switch or setting that’s only there to make you feel better? Does pressing a Pedestrian Crossing button actually do anything? Does a Door Close button in an elevator? And how about the office thermostat?

My philosophy of life … speak softly and own a big, mean Doberman.

Before her success as a comedian, TV host Ellen DeGeneres considered becoming which?
a. Wrestler.
b. Golfer. [CORRECT]
c. Bowler.

Question: Women are responsible for 10% of THESE.
Answer: Marriage proposals.

Necessity is the mother of strange bedfellows.

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