Friday, February 25, 2005        Edition: #2978
Bully For You!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TODAY Star Trek fans plan a rally outside of Paramount Studios in Hollywood to protest UPN’s cancellation of “Star Trek: Enterprise” after 4 seasons (3 words, people – Life, Get One) . . . SATURDAY at the 25th annual “Razzie Awards”, the tongue-in-cheek prizes saluting the worst films of the year, “Catwoman” leads nominations with 7, followed by “Alexander” just behind with 6 (George W Bush has a ‘Worst Actor’ nomination for “Fahrenheit 9/11″) . . . SATURDAY “Canadian Idol” auditions take place in Whitehorse YT during the annual “Rendezvous” celebration . . . SUNDAY ABC-TV’s 24th edition of the Oscar-night “Barbara Walters Special” will feature “Desperate Housewives” star Teri Hatcher, “Ray” star Jamie Foxx, and comic actor Will Ferrell (Hatcher, by the way, has signed up for a course in pole-dancing – to stay in shape) . . . Actor Christian Slater has filed a petition to end his 5-year marriage to TV producer Ryan Haddon due to the ubiquitous ‘irreconcilable differences’ (she wanted him to come home at least once in a while while he wanted to experience lapdances around-the-world) . . . “Variety” reports that a romantic comedy is being developed to co-star Jim Carrey & Angelina Jolie, who have both expressed an interest in working together in a film . . . Word has it Bollywood star Aishwarya Rai is set to play a ‘Bond girl’ in the 21st ‘James Bond’ film, “Casino Royale”, in which ‘007′ will face – ouch! – castration! . . . Over $350,000-worth of jewelry has been stolen from Jack Osbourne’s suitcase during a flight from LA to London (what is it with these Osbournes and security?) . . . And wacky movie director Quentin Tarantino has signed on to direct the season finalé of TV’s #1 show, “CSI” (likely a case involving a hypo to the heart).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Alicia Keys – TONIGHT she kicks off her 34-city “Diary Tour” of ‘intimate venues’ in Miami FL.
• Black Eyed Peas – Fergie says she’s been getting all kinds of perverted phone messages thanks to her phone number being revealed on Paris Hilton’s PDA. She’s now planning to change her number.
• Elton John – This year his annual “Academy Awards” after-party will feature the Scissor Sisters performing their own set plus 2 songs with Elton.
• Good Charlotte – TONIGHT they do the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno”.
• Ludacris – TOMORROW he’s on NBC-TV’s “Saturday Night Live”.
• Michelle Branch – The 21-year-old singer and her 40-year-old hubby Teddy Landau are expecting their first child in AUGUST. So Mich’, “Are You Happy Now?”
• Pink – Rumors are flying she’s pregnant after she was spotted visiting a Beverly Hills’ health center. She’s had an on/off relationship with motocross racer Carey Hart since 2001.
• Prince – He’s been added to the list of presenters for SUNDAY’s “Academy Awards”.
• Ray Charles – His multiple Grammy-winning “Genius Loves Company” has just become his first #1 album since 1962.

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Cursed” (PG-13 Horror Thriller): After being mauled by a werewolf, victims discover they must kill their attacker if they hope to change their fate. Stars Christina Ricci, Portia de Rossi, Jesse Eisenberg, and singer Mya. Plagued by production problems and script issues, the release has been delayed for over a year while more than half the film was re-shot.
• “Diary of a Mad Black Woman” (PG-13 Romantic Comedy): Just as a seemingly picture-perfect couple prepares to celebrate their 20th wedding anniversary, the husband decides he wants a divorce to be with the wife’s best friend. Based on a hit stage play of the same name. Stars Kimberly Elise, Steve Harris & Shemar Moore.
• “Man of the House” (PG-13 Comedy): Tommy Lee Jones stars as a Texas Ranger who must protect a group of cheerleaders who have witnessed a murder. He goes undercover as an assistant coach in order to protect the girls from thugs determined to kill them.

77TH ANNUAL ACADEMY AWARDS:
SUNDAY at 8 pm EST, Chris Rock hosts live on ABC-TV from the Kodak Theater in Hollywood.
• “The Aviator” leads nominations with 11, followed by “Million Dollar Baby” and “Finding Neverland” with 7 apiece.
• Oscar-nominated songs will be performed by Antonio Banderas w/Carlos Santana, Beyoncé, Josh Groban, and Counting Crows.
• Jamie Foxx has 2 nominations: ‘Best Supporting Actor’ for “Collateral” and ‘Best Actor’ for “Ray”. Clint Eastwood also has 2 nominations: ‘Best Director’ and ‘Best Actor’, both for “Million Dollar Baby”.
• Organizers refuse to discuss the Oscar ‘gift basket’ (worth more than $100,000 last year) that’s handed out to participants but it’s been leaked that this year’s edition includes a coffeemaker, toaster, electric kettle and year’s supply of coffee & tea ($700), a 2-night stay at The Carlyle in NYC ($2,300), mink eyelashes ($600), a 3-night stay in California wine country ($2,500), a 3-night stay at a beach resort & spa including a ‘personal surf-butler’ ($5,900), cashmere pajama bottoms ($500), and a limited-edition version of the ultrathin, Motorola V3 Razr phone. The ‘official’ gift bag has recently been joined by dozens of unofficial gift baskets handed out to celebs.
BIG QUESTIONS ABOUT THE ACADEMY AWARDS
• After all his inflammatory putdowns of the show, can Chris Rock actually make it entertaining and keep it moving along? If so, he may have a permanent gig.
• Will the Academy choose to recognize some outstanding performances in small productions by lesser-known names (ie: Imelda Staunton) or will it continue its tradition of honoring only well-known names in big-budget Hollywood productions?
• Will 6-time nominee Martin Scorsese, arguably the most prominent filmmaker who has never won an Oscar, finally win the big one?
• Will changes in the format help cut down on the excruciatingly long and boring acceptance speeches?

WE WOULDN’T STEER YOU WRONG:
Japan’s Nissan Corp is developing a computer-controlled system that will nudge a vehicle back into its lane if it starts to swerve. The system combines video cameras and computer control to keep vehicles heading in the right direction. Nissan engineers say the system is disabled when the driver uses the turn signal to change lanes or make turns. (Too bad. That would mean the system will never work for those who need it most – drivers over 70.)
– AP

STYLE STATEMENTS:
• Ace Hardware paint expert Jane Brill says ‘comfort colors’ tinged with red and yellow will be among the hot colors for homes this year. Red, in particular, she says, is intense, dramatic and flattering, and makes a bold backdrop for strong home accessories.
– “Richmond Times-Dispatch”
• National Association of Men’s Sportswear Buyers director Jack Herschlag says that if guys want tips on what’s hot in menswear, they should watch TV news anchors, game-show hosts and sports show analysts. They dress extremely well, and have a lot more influence and credibility than an actor or so-called fashion ‘expert’.
– “Commercial Appeal”

SCIENTISTS SAY:
A BS compendium of recent ‘discoveries’ …
• Scientists say … a woman’s ability to reach orgasm is at least partly due to her genes, according to a new study at the University of Chicago. (Yep, the tighter the better.)
• Scientists say … soccer players are 6 times more prone to fatal brain diseases due to repeatedly using their heads to hit the ball, according to an Italian study. (Geez, doesn’t that make you feel sorry for bull riders?)
• Scientists say … contestants in any kind of competition are more likely to win if they are among the last to appear before the judges. A Carnegie Mellon University study finds that a competitor who appears 1st in a contest is 2% less likely to win than one who appears 2nd, and so on down the line. (For instance, if you appear first on “American Idol” you always suffer the wrath of Cowell.)
• Scientists say … if you are under age 30, you have a whopping 90% chance of getting fired in the next 20 years. (About the same as [co-host’s] odds of staying celibate.)

2005’S MOST POPULAR COLLEGE MAJORS:
1. Accounting
2. Electrical Engineering
3. Mechanical Engineering
4. Business Administration/Management
5. Economics/Finance
– Job Outlook 2005 survey.

AND WE QUOTE:
• “I know exactly how I’m going to kill them. I know when I’m going to do it, and I’m going to enjoy it. OJ Simpson has nothing on me.”
– Lindsay Lohan’s dysfunctional dad Michael Lohan in divorce papers filed by her mother Dina Lohan. They apparently proved to be idle threats (unfortunately).
• “I feel horrible that, once again, someone has invaded my privacy. I want to apologize to all my friends and family.”
– Paris Hilton telling “Us Weekly” how badly she feels about her latest publicity stunt … er … mishap when her PDA was hacked and phone numbers of the famous revealed.

THE BULL SHEET 02.25.2K5

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1967 [38] Carrot Top (Scott Thompson), Cocoa Beach FL, clown-haired comedian who relies on wacky props/ad huckster

1971 [34] Sean Astin, Santa Monica CA, movie actor (“50 First Dates”, ‘Sam Gamgee’ in the “Lord of the Rings” trilogy)

1986 [19] Justin Berfield, LA CA, TV actor (‘Reese’ on “Malcolm in the Middle” since 2000)

1986 [19] James & Oliver Phelps, Sutton Coldfield UK, twin actors (‘Fred & George Weasley’ in the “Harry Potter” films)

SATURDAY’S BIRTHDAYS . . .
Rock & roll pioneer Fats Domino (“Blueberry Hill”) is 77; Pop singer Michael Bolton (“How Am I Supposed to Live Without You”) is 51; Pop singer Erykah Badu  (“Bag Lady”) is 34.

SUNDAY’S BIRTHDAYS . . .
Oscar-winning movie actress Joanne Woodward (“The Three Faces of Eve”) is 75; Oscar-winning movie actress Elizabeth Taylor (“Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf”) is 73; Consumer advocate & US presidential candidate Ralph Nader is 71; Pop singer Rozonda ‘Chilli’ Thomas (TLC) is 34; Operatic singer Josh Groban (“You Raise Me Up”) is 24.

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
TODAY is –
• “Life Is Just a Bowl of Cherries Day”. One thing for sure, afterward it’s the pits.
• “Lumberjack Day”, honoring a tough job that’s become a popular sport … logging games.
• “Don’t Utter a Word Day”, because the world is made up of talkers and listeners … and the listeners need a rest.

SATURDAY is –
• “Pistachio Day”, apparently honoring people addicted to having pink dye all over their mouths.
• “For Pete’s Sake Day”, which asks the pressing question, ‘Just who the hell is Pete, anyway, and why would we do anything for his sake?’
• “Levi Strauss’ Birthday” (1829-1902), who created the first Levi’s blue jeans for California’s gold miners in 1850. Without him many of us wouldn’t have a wardrobe.

SUNDAY is –
• “International Polar Bear Day”, declared by non-profit conservation group Polar Bears International to heighten awareness of the declining population of the big white guys of the north.
• “Read Five Pages in the Dictionary Day”. Just think, if you do this each day for the rest of your life … you’ll be really boring.
• “No Brainer Day”, when we’re encouraged to slack off. Any activity attempted should be something done without serious thought … a ‘no brainer’ activity.

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1995 [10] Madonna’s biggest hit single, “Take A Bow”, reaches #1 on pop charts and stays 9 weeks

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1940 [65] 1st ‘Televised Hockey Game’ (NY Rangers vs Montréal Canadiens on W2XBS-TV in NYC)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1896 [109] ‘Largest chicken egg’ on record laid by a Black Minorca hen in England (the 5-yolk egg weighs nearly 12 ounces and measures 12.25 inches around the long axis and 9 inches around the short axis)

1981 [24] ‘Most-Penalized NHL Game’ as Boston Bruins and Minnesota North Stars amass 84 penalties for a total of 392 minutes

COMING UP . . .
[Mon] International Floral Design Day
[Mon] Public Sleeping Day
[Tues] “The Amazing Race 7″ debuts
This Week Is . . . Telecommuter Appreciation Week (try a telecommuter traffic report!)
This Month Is . . . TV Sweeps Month

BULL’S BITS . . .
3 SIMPLE RULES TO BECOMING A BETTER BROADCASTER:
• Whenever you turn the mike on, make sure you have something worthwhile to say. Communicate ideas clearly and concisely so they can be easily understood. If you have nothing to say, shut up.
• Quit talking about yourself all the time. Radio is all about the listener. Turn your comments around 180 degrees so they’re less about the pronoun ‘I’ and more about ‘YOU’.
• Quit trying to be funny all the time. Why does everything you say have to have a punchline? People either have a sense of humor or they don’t. If you do, it will come out naturally. If you don’t, quit trying to be a comedian and concentrate on becoming a better communicator.

BS PHONE STARTER:
Are you suffering from awards-show fatigue?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: The average guy does THIS 6 times in his life.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Falls in love.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Don’t worry about what people think, they don’t do it very often.