October 26, 2000 Edition: #1919
REALLY CHEAP HALLOWEEN COSTUMES:
• Shovel, miner’s helmet, gold pan – you’re Anna Nicole Smith!
• Super glue upper molars to lower molars, speak – it’s Jean Chretien!
• Duct tape an ‘X’ across your chest – you’re a “Hollywood Square”
• Tie funnel on top of head. Tin Man? No – the famous Canadian ‘brain drain’!
• Fill bra with silicone, put on Catholic school girl uniform and presto — Britney Spears!
• Stuff a glove in mouth of plush tiger and carry it under arm — you’re Siegfried and Roy!
• Wear nothing, glue hair on back — Richard Hatch!
• Tell host you’re coming as Whitney Houston — don’t show up!
• Place head up butt. Go as [your co-host].
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TODAY Whitney Houston is scheduled to appear in a Hawaii court on charges of carrying cannabis in her luggage there last year (if she’s a no-show, prosecutors may issue an arrest warrant) . . . According to a Buckingham Palace insider, Britney Spears has been asked to lay off sending letters and autographed pictures to Prince William (she drives him craaaaa-zee) . . . Sharon Stone is said to have warned real estate heir and former boyfriend Stephen Bing about his new girlfriend Elizabeth Hurley’s penchant for chasing super-rich men (what’s that old saying about the pot and the kettle?).
FUTURE FLICKS:
A sequel to the current #1 hit comedy “Meet the Parents” is in early development and is tentatively titled “Meet the Fockers”, a reference to the name of Ben Stiller’s character (wonder if they’re big Fockers or little Fockers) . . . Angelina Jolie is doing many of her own stunts for her new movie “Tomb Raider”, but for a semi-nude butt shot, she called for a body double (then it was the other cheeks turn) . . . And word is Ms Jolie is flatly refusing to play love scenes with Kevin Costner in Oliver Stone’s upcoming “Beyond Borders” because he’s 45, old enough to be her father (um, says here that her hubby Billy Bob Thornton is turning 45 this year).
BS FROM AROUND-THE-WORLD:
• Researchers at Britain’s Nottingham Trent University report that eating spicy curry gives you a ‘natural high’ that can become addictive. The study suggests that curry fans build up a tolerance to the spices and crave increasingly hotter dishes. (I’ve got a Masala jones.)
• A pair of newlyweds in Hamburg, Germany who recently moved into their dream house were horrified to discover the skeletal remains of a man who’d been stuck in the chimney for almost 50 years. (Is this a scary Halloween story — or an even scarier Christmas story?)
• A family of four in Vienna, Austria has fled their home, claiming ghosts that took up residence in their spare bedroom were driving them crazy — by playing the tuba. (Now there’s just Grandma, Grampa and oom-pah.)
BS AMAZIN’ FACTS:
• More than 200 species of creatures live on the outside and inside of the human body.
• Men get hiccups more often than women.
• Women laugh at men more than men laugh at women.
• 36% of us have slept overnight in a car.
THE BULL SHEET 10.26.00
TODAY’S CELEBRITY BIRTHDAYS . . .
1946 [54] Pat Sajak, Chicago IL, TV game show host (“Wheel of Fortune” since 1981)
1946 [54] Ivan Reitman, Komarmo CZE [raised in Canada], movie producer/director (“Ghostbusters”, “Meatballs”, “Animal House”)/1985 Special Achievement Genie Award NEXT FILM: Shooting has just begun on his new sci-fi comedy “Evolution”, starring David Duchovny
1947 [53] Hillary Rodham Clinton, Park Ridge IL, US First Lady/future NY Senator?
1962 [38] Cary Elwes, London ENG, film actor (“Kiss the Girls”, “Twister”)
1962 [38] Dylan McDermott, Waterbury CT, TV actor (Bobby Donnell-“The Practice”)
1963 [37] Natalie Merchant, Jamestown NY, rock singer (“Jealousy”, “Carnival”)
BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
TODAY is “Cranky Co-Workers Day”, when crankiness on-the-job is ENCOURAGED. After all, everyone has a bad day now and then — so have a snit, whine, complain, and generally have a great time at it!
ON THIS DAY IN THE ’90S . . .
1992 [08] Canadians vote ‘No’ in referendum on Charlottetown Accord for constitutional amendments (which would have reduced and reformed the Senate)
TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1970 [30] “Doonesbury” comic strip by Garry Trudeau debuts in 28 newspapers
NET: http://www.doonesbury.com
1975 [25] ‘Heimlich Maneuver’ 1st approved as aid for people choking on food (Dr Henry Heimlich)
1982 [18] ‘Canadian Baseball Hall of Fame’ organized in Toronto (permanent site in St Mary’s ON includes regulation diamond nicknamed ‘Field of Dreams’)
NET: http://www.baseballhof.ca
1990 [10] 1st NHLer to reach 2,000 career points (Wayne Gretzky, while playing for LA Kings)
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Sun] Daylight Savings Time ends
[Mon] Gemini Awards
Peace, Friendship and Good Will Week
Canadian Stamp Month
BULL’S BITS . . .
MAKE HIM MAD:
Got a really good ‘guy prize’ to give away? Let women try to win it for their men. Have them call their mates at work and try to make ‘em mad within an allotted time. Most women know exactly which buttons to push. If he loses it, he wins!
BS CLASSIC ROCK QUIZ:
We give you lyrics from a classic hit, you name the tune.
• “ I know that I’m a hostage to all his hopes and fears.” [ANSWER: “The Living Years”, Mike and the Mechanics]
• “And we can dress real neat from our hats to our feet.” [ANSWER: “The Safety Dance”, Men Without Hats]
• “He was six foot four and full of muscles.” [ANSWER: “Down Under”, Men At Work]
• “The landlord say your rent is late.” [ANSWER: “Don’t Worry Be Happy”, Bobby McFerrin]
BS TAG LINE:
Success is not permanent, neither is failure.