Friday, April 16, 2021 — Edition: #6967
The BS Press!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez have officially called it quits, weeks after attempting to work through past issues. They issued a joint statement yesterday, saying in part: “We have realized we are better as friends and look forward to remaining so. We will continue to work together and support each other on our shared businesses and projects. We wish the best for each other and one another’s children.” 51-year-old Lopez and 45-year-old Rodriguez had announced they were “working through some things” after news broke that they had ended their engagement in early March.
-People
★ Former star of “The Bachelor” Colton Underwood is getting his own reality show at Netflix. The project, which is currently in production, is an unscripted series, focusing on Underwood living his life publicly as a gay man. News of his deal comes after the television personality, author and former pro football player came out on national television during an interview that aired Wednesday on ABC’s “Good Morning America.”
-Yahoo
★ Tom Hanks’ son Chet is facing a $1 million lawsuit after being accused of physical abuse by his ex-girlfriend. He’s being sued by Kiana Parker for assault and battery and intentional infliction of emotional distress, according to “People”. Parker’s suit comes a month after Hanks filed his own lawsuit against her for theft, assault, conversion and battery.
-Yahoo
★ Jaleel White, famous for his cultural touchstone role as ‘Steve Urkel’ in “Family Matters”, is entering the cannabis industry. Through a partnership with 710 Labs, White’s new cannabis line, called “ItsPurpl”, features variants of the popular cannabis strain ‘Purple Urkle’. It is set to launch on Tuesday. The brand will be on dispensary shelves in California to start, potentially expanding to more marketplaces in the future.
-Forbes
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Michael Strahan, Jon Pardi
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Sacha Baron Cohen, Viet Thanh Nguyen, Ash Soan (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Eddie Murphy, Tiana Major9 (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Yvette Nicole Brown
• “The Talk” (CBS): Mickey Guyton, Lorraine Toussaint
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Morris Chestnut, Amy Brightfield
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Andra Day, Lil Rel Howery, Tomorrow X Together, guest host Tiffany Haddish
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Elizabeth Nyamayaro, Chrissy Teigen, Eiza González, Pentatonix
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Tom Selleck, Gucci Westman
• “Whose Line Is It Anyway?” (CW): Season 9 finale
• “Penn & Teller: Fool Us” (CW): Season 7 finale
• “OWN Spotlight” (OWN): Viola Davis
SATURDAY-
• “Envy: A Seven Deadly Sins Story” (LIFETIME): Gabrielle has a devoted husband, a beautiful daughter and a successful career in public relations. But she stands to lose everything when she meets Keisha, her devious half sister who wants everything Gabrielle has.
• “Right in Front of Me” (HALLMARK): A woman gets a second chance at romance with her college crush, but isn’t sure how to impress him until her new male friend gives her advice.
SUNDAY-
• “56th Academy of Country Music Awards” (CBS): Honoring achievement in country music at 3 iconic venues in Nashville; Keith Urban and Mickey Guyton host; performers include Elle King and Miranda Lambert, Dierks Bentley, Thomas Rhett, Chris Stapleton, Brothers Osborne, Kenny Chesney, Eric Church, Luke Combs and more.
• “American Idol” (ABC): Oscar Nominated Songs
• “Roll Up Your Sleeves” (NBC): Barack and Michelle Obama, Lin-Manuel Miranda and more educate and empower Americans to get vaccinated against COVID-19, and Dr. Anthony Fauci separates fact from fiction about the vaccine while urging all Americans to do their part.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Selena Gomez – will host “Vax Live: The Concert to Reunite the World” on May 8 on ABC, ABC News Live, CBS, Fox and YouTube. The concert, to inspire vaccine confidence worldwide, will feature performances from Jennifer Lopez, Eddie Vedder, Foo Fighters, J Balvin, and H.E.R.
• Cardi B – has joined up with Reebok (again) for the “Cardi B x Reebok Summertime Fine Collection”. The 47-piece line includes 23 pieces of apparel and 24 styles of sneakers.
• Christina Aguilera – has another Spanish album is in the works, and says it’s “about 20 years overdue”. She’s actually been developing two new musical projects – one in Spanish and the other in English.
• Black Keys – have announced their new covers album “Delta Kream” will drop May 14. It features 11 songs from the Mississippi hill country blues artists who inspired the duo. The lead single “Crawling Kingsnake,” their take on John Lee Hooker’s version of the blues standard, can be heard at the band’s fan site. LINK: https://www.thelonelyboysandgirlsclub.com
• The Beatles — The ‘holy grail’ of all Beatles albums, the only known factory sealed “White Album” marked “0000001”, has hit auction block. It has a starting bid of $25,000, but has been appraised for $1 million. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/ezzrrmrk
• Toto – will release “With A Little Help From My Friends” on June 25. The live album/DVD captures the November, 2020 concert when Steve Lukather, Joseph Williams and David Paich appeared for the first time with the group’s new lineup for a livestream from Los Angeles.
• David Bowie — A collection of previously unheard songs has been compiled into the new 2-CD set “The Width of a Circle”. The album, arriving on May 28, will feature 21 recordings from 1970, including non-album singles, a BBC in Concert l session, music for a TV play, and new remixes.
• Kane Brown – The ACMs aren’t until Sunday, but he is already a winner. Brown’s video for ‘Worldwide Beautiful’ has been named Video of the Year. He was surprised with the news while appearing on “CBS This Morning” on Wednesday.
• Morgan Wallen – In a letter to fans, he said he’s been working on himself, and he’ll need to keep doing so. Quote: “I’ve made some mistakes, I’m figuring those out, + I apologized because I was truly sorry + have been making amends.” While he says he won’t be playing any live shows this summer, he wrote that his story is “far from over.”
• Reba McEntire – has announced a series of concerts for 2022, after being forced to call off her scheduled shows for this year. The shows are actually postponed dates from a tour that was originally scheduled for 2020. She’s also involved in a number of other projects, including NBC’s upcoming “Fried Green Tomatoes” series.”
SHOOTING THE BULL
PET PROJECTS:
⇒ Fancy Feast isn’t just for your cat anymore. The Purina cat food brand has released a cookbook for humans, to celebrate the debut of its new line of single-serve entrees, “Petites”. The “Fancy Feast Petites Feast Cookbook” is free to download, and includes 12 single-serve recipes inspired by Petites, so humans can enjoy dinner alongside their felines. The 12 recipes in the cookbook include “Chicken and Ramen with Tomato Honey Butter Sauce”, “Honey Sriracha Grilled Chicken with Spicy Fried Rice”, and “Whitefish and Asparagus with Beurre Blanc”. The company says the recipes are “easy enough to whip up on a weeknight” and “are for humans but were created in honor of the dishes you will be serving your cat.” (Lovely. I look forward to serving it to my kids and finding it later on the carpet…right beside the cat’s dinner…)
⇒ If you’ve been thinking that it’s about time your dog starting paying for his keep, Anheuser-Busch has the perfect gig. The brewer is now accepting applications for the newly-created position of Busch Dog Brew “chief tasting officer” – and the job pays $20,000! Last year, Busch introduced ‘Busch Dog Brew’, an alcohol-free, bone broth brew that gives owners “the perfect opportunity to crack a cold one with their favorite canine companion.” Now, the brand is seeking to bring on a “four-legged member with a discerning palate” to the brew’s senior leadership team. Responsibilities will include leading the expansion of Dog Brew’s flavor portfolio, quality control, taste-testing and posing as an ambassador. In addition to the $20K salary, the gig also comes perks like health-care coverage and free Busch Dog Brew, which Busch refers to as “company stock options.” Your pup can apply by filling out an online application and posting a picture on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter with their qualifications and the hashtag #BuschCTOcontest. The “job posting” ends April 28. (That’s ALL I need. A dog that makes more money than I do!)
LINK: https://www.busch.com/CTO
-Fox, NYPost
NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ A Taiwanese man came up with an ingenious way of getting extended paid leave from work: he got married 4 times and divorced 3 times in 37 days. According to law in Taiwan, a person has the right to 8 days paid work leave when they get married, which is exactly what the unnamed man received when he got married on April 6th of last year. But that was just the beginning. On the last day of his leave, he divorced his wife, only to marry her again the next day, and receive another paid leave. He went on to marry the same woman 4 times, and divorce her 3 times in 37 days, for a total of 32 days of paid leave. (If I tried to pull that off, I’m pretty sure my wife would be the one taking “leave…”)
➢A French town had its official Facebook page removed, apparently because its name is very similar to an English insult. The mayor of “Ville de Bitche”, Benoit Kieffer, said the town’s Facebook page was taken down in March, when officials received a message saying it was “in violation of conditions applying to Facebook pages.” The town attempted to appeal the decision, but never received a response from Facebook. Town officials believe the error stemmed from the word “Bitche” being similar in spelling to an English-language profanity, which refers to a female dog. The mayor said an artificial intelligence program likely flagged the town’s name as a rules violation. On Tuesday, Facebook said Ville de Bitche’s page was restored and had been “removed in error.”
(Sometimes, those profanity filters can be a…well, you know!)
(Fine! Have your page back, Bitches!)
-OddityCentral, UPI
DID YOU KNOW?
Women who are stressed before pregnancy are almost twice as likely to have a girl, according to researchers at the University of Granada. They aren’t sure why, but one theory is that high concentrations of the stress hormone cortisol have an effect on hormones which influence the child’s sex. But study authors believe the most likely explanation is that more male babies are miscarried due to stress. It’s a phenomenon which scientists do not yet fully understand, but think could be an evolutionary adaptation.
-StudyFinds
BS CHRONOMETER 04.16.21
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1947 [74] Kareem Abdul-Jabbar [Lew Alcindor], NYC, retired NBA superstar (Milwaukee Bucks, LA Lakers) 6-time NBA MVP, 19-time All-Star, 6-time champion)/movie actor (“Airplane!”, “Fletch”)
1952 [69] Bill Belichick, Nashville TN, NFL head coach (New England Patriots since 2000, Cleveland Browns 1991-95)/3X NFL Coach of the Year/6 career Super Bowl championships
1964 [57] Dave Pirner, Green Bay WI, alt-rock singer-guitarist (Soul Asylum-‘Runaway Train’, ‘Misery’)
1965 [56] Jon Cryer, NYC, TV actor (“Supergirl” since 2019, “Two-and-a-Half Men” 2003-15)
1965 [56] Martin Lawrence, Frankfurt-am-Maim Germany, movie actor (“Big Momma’s House” films, “Bad Boys” films)
1971 [50] Peter Billingsley, NYC, movie actor (“A Christmas Story”)/producer (“Iron Man”)
1976 [45] Lukas Haas, West Hollywood CA, movie actor (“Lincoln”, “Inception”)
1984 [37] Claire Foy, Stockport England, movie actress (“First Man”)/TV actress (‘Queen Elizabeth’ in “The Crown” 2016-17)
1993 [28] Chance the Rapper (Chancellor J Bennett), Chicago IL, rapper (DJ Khaled featuring Justin Bieber, Quavo, Chance the Rapper and Lil Wayne – ‘I’m the One’)
1996 [25] Anya Taylor-Joy, Miami FL, movie actress (“The Queen’s Gambit”, “The Witch”)
2002 [19] Sadie Sink, Houston TX, TV actress (‘Max’ on “Stranger Things” since 2017)
SATURDAY- Sean Bean (“Game of Thrones”) is 62; Sports commentator Boomer (Norman) Esiason is 60; Jennifer Garner (“Alias”) is 49; Victoria Beckham (Spice Girls) is 47; Rooney Mara (“The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo”) is 36
SUNDAY- Rick Moranis (“Honey, I Shrunk the Kids”) is 68; Ventriloquist Jeff Dunham is 59; Conan O’Brien (“Conan”) is 58; David Tennant (“Doctor Who”) is 50; Mark Tremonti (Creed) is 47; Melissa Joan Hart (“Sabrina the Teenage Witch”) is 45; Kourtney Kardashian (“Keeping Up With the Kardashians”) is 42
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Eggs Benedict Day”, a day to enjoy heart-attack-on-a-plate – poached eggs, topped with back bacon, served on toasted English muffins, and slathered in Hollandaise sauce … made of even more egg-yolks and butter. (Because we’re “Hollandaise” together!)
• “Wear Your Pajamas to Work Day”, an annual event begun as a promotion for a pajama-maker that’s evolved into another fun excuse for office hijinks. (I’ve been wearing my PJs while I work for a year now…)
• “Healthcare Decisions Day”, to inspire and educate the public and providers about the importance of advance care planning.
• “Save the Elephant Day”, to raise awareness of threats to their future in both Africa and Asia, ranging from poachers and traffickers to loss of habitat. At current rates, ivory poaching could make the African elephant extinct within decades, according to “TIME”.
• “World Voice Day”, initiated in 1999 as a celebration of the phenomenon of voice as a tool of communication. Usual events include concerts, symposia, and open houses at voice clinics, TV shows, and radio programs. (What celeb has the greatest voice…aside from Gilbert Gottfried?)
• “Day of the Mushroom”, celebrating edible mushrooms, which can be eaten plain, be stuffed, or be used in salads, soups, and sauces. (And pizzas!)
• “World Semicolon Day”, to celebrate those who chose not to end their lives because their stories are not over yet. Why the semicolon? When authors use semicolons, it shows that a sentence is not yet ended and that the story is not yet over. Suicide survivors mark the day by sharing their stories, to raise awareness for mental health and suicide prevention.
SATURDAY-
• “Bat Appreciation Day”, to generate positive awareness about bats ahead of possible negative interactions with people after their Winter-long hibernation (…plus some recent bad press!)
NET: http://www.batcon.org
• “Blah Blah Blah Day”, a day to do all the things that people have been nagging you to do. This might include quitting a habit, losing weight, working on home projects, blah blah blah…
• “Cheese Ball Day”, saluting the hors d’oeuvre made with cream cheese, seasonings, and chopped nuts. (Also, apparently to celebrate the sense of humor displayed on this radio show…)
• “Haiku Poetry Day”, a celebration of the genre of poetry whose origins date back a millennium in Japan; and of English-language haiku, which has now been written for more than a century. To create one of these short poems, stick to a syllable pattern of 5-7-5. For example:
Haikus are easy,
But sometimes they don’t make sense
Refrigerator.
• “World Hemophilia Day”, a day of awareness of the genetic disorder that impairs the body’s ability to control bleeding through clotting or coagulation.
SUNDAY-
• “Adult Autism Awareness Day”, to create awareness of the Adult Autism Community, demonstrate the importance of transition planning, promote inclusiveness through education, and improve social and employment outcomes for adults with autism.
• “Newspaper Columnists Day”, initiated in 1995 by the National Society of Newspaper Columnists to increase awareness of the importance and contribution made by columnists and journalists worldwide. (Without whom, talk radio wouldn’t know where to find employees!)
• “National Animal Crackers Day”, bringing us back to our childhood and the many boxes of Animal Crackers we shared with our friends. Animal Crackers are a type of small cookie baked in the shape of circus or zoo animals, such as a lion, tiger, bear or elephant.
• “Pet Owners Independence Day”, for all of those who have pets. If you do, be proud and celebrate yourself! Take the day off work and send your pet in your place. Then, enjoy life from the perspective of your furry friend by sleeping all day long (and eating the couch…)
• “World Amateur Radio Day”, honoring the hobby of ‘ham radio’. It’s observed on the anniversary of the 1925 founding of the International Amateur Radio Union. (Amateur? Radio? Are you pointing at me?)
THIS DAY IN SHOWBIZ:
2005 [16] “Survivor: All-Stars” winner Amber Brkich weds “The Amazing Race” star ‘Boston’ Rob Mariano in the Bahamas
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2007 [14] Carrie Underwood’s ‘Before He Cheats’ wins “Video of the Year”, “Best Female Video”, and “Best Video Director” at the fan-voted CMT Music Awards
2010 [11] Lady Gaga breaks the YouTube record for ‘Most Views’ for an artist, logging more than 1 billion
2018 [03] Kendrick Lamar’s album “DAMN.” wins the Pulitzer Prize for music, making him the first rapper to win the award
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2009 [12] The NY Yankees play their first official game at the new Yankee Stadium in the Bronx (Kelly Clarkson sings the anthem; Hall of Fame catcher Yogi Berra throws out the first pitch)
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2002 [19] 6 foot-11-inch Jon Rauch of the Chicago White Sox becomes ‘Tallest Player in Major League Baseball History’ (tallest active player? Tyler Glasnow of the Tampa Bay Rays is listed at 6’8”. Shortest? Houston’s Jose Altuve: 5’6″)
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ ‘Darth Vader’ is derived from Old Dutch, meaning “Dark Father”.
✓ The cast of “Friends” still earns around $20 million each year in royalties.
✓ The Comic Sans font came from an actual comic book.
✓ Allergy season is getting longer and more intense each year.
✓ In feudal Japan, lords purposely built homes with squeaky floors as a defensive measure against ninjas.
✓ The word “MacGyvered” is in the Oxford English Dictionary.
-RandomWordGenerator
Best of BS . . .
BS SIGNS YOU JOINED THE WRONG MARTIAL ARTS SCHOOL:
• First demonstration consists of falling to the floor, curling up into the fetal position, and whimpering.
• The gis [‘jhees’] look suspiciously like old hospital gowns.
• Your dojo’s symbol is a bulls-eye.
• The defensive techniques are only effective if your attacker is one of The Three Stooges.
• Every night, local muggers gather in the parking lot waiting for class to end.
• You take yourself to the mat every time you try to tie your belt on.
• At the end of each class, your instructor says, “…or you could just buy a friggin’ gun.”
-Adapted from TopFive.com, first published in BS in 2018
TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ The new iPad Pro 2021 is expected to be officially announced on Tuesday. (It’s more advanced than the previous iPad. But probably nowhere near as cool as the next week’s Apple announcement…)
➠ The new Apple iPad Pro looks similar to the previous one, except it’s lighter and more put-together. (Kinda like Kendall and Kylie Jenner…)
➠ According to a recent report, unhappiness does NOT cause early death. (Researchers came to that conclusion when they discovered Nancy Pelosi is still alive.)
➠ Did you know that Ducks can catch the Flu? It’s true! (Explains why he always felt “down”.)
➠ Fact of the Day: There are 4.8 billion people who own mobile phones, but only 4.2 billion own a toothbrush. (Yeah, but have you ever tried sexting with a toothbrush? . . . didn’t think so. Carry on with your day…)
BS WEB GOODIE:
Gangsta: https://tinyurl.com/c9hmt92w
BS RANDOM JOKE:
If my boss knew how unproductive I am on Fridays, he wouldn’t want me here either.
BS PHONE STARTER:
What movie do you believe everyone should watch at least once?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: A survey says that one in three kids have asked a parent to stop doing THIS. What is it?
Answer: Cursing
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races, one after another.
