Tuesday, February 23, 2021 – Edition: #6923
Have Another Sheetload!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Woody Allen and wife Soon-Yi Previn have issued a statement slamming the new HBO docuseries “Allen v. Farrow”. The special, which premiered Sunday, features Allen’s ex, Mia Farrow, and her daughter, Dylan, speaking about their longstanding allegations that Allen sexually abused Dylan, which the director has denied. In a statement, a spokesperson for Allen and Previn said: “These documentarians had no interest in the truth. Instead, they spent years surreptitiously collaborating with the Farrows and their enablers to put together a hatchet job riddled with falsehoods.”
★ A settlement has been reached in a 2019 lawsuit alleging that James Franco intimidated his students into sexual situations at the acting school he founded. Two of Franco’s former students at his now-defunct Studio 4 school have agreed to drop their claims. Their sexual exploitation claims are also being dismissed without prejudice, which leaves them open to being re-filed. Additionally, fraud allegations brought forward in the suit will be subject to limited release. It is not immediately clear how much money was involved in the settlement.
★ Friday’s show marked the last “Jeopardy!” appearance by guest host Ken Jennings, the first replacement since the death of longtime moderator Alex Trebek. In a tweet, Jennings wrote: “That’s a wrap on my six weeks of @Jeopardy guest hosting. Thanks for watching, thanks for your patience with a tough learning curve…and, as always, thank you Alex.” Future guest hosts include Jeopardy! executive producer Mike Richards, Katie Couric, Green Bay Packers Quarterback Aaron Rodgers, 60 Minutes Correspondent Bill Whitaker and “Big Bang Theory’s” Mayim Bialik.
★ Ricki Lake is getting hitched. She announced her engagement to boyfriend Ross Burningham on Instagram. In a recent interview with People, Lake said she and Burningham, who have been dating for over a year, “literally pinch ourselves that we have found each other at this time in our lives.” She said that because both of them are empty-nesters, they feel like “kids again. We are filled with gratitude and joy for what is to come.”
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Sen. Bernie Sanders, Soleil Moon Frye, Lord Huron
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Tom Holland, Andra Day, Mary McCartney
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Billie Eilish, Anna Palmer, Jake Sherman
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Colin Jost, Harvey Guillen, Raghav Mehrotra
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Drew Barrymore, Storm Reid
• “Conan” (TBS): Colin Quinn
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Ricki Lake, John Waters
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Andra Day
• “The Talk” (CBS): Jack Osbourne
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Evan Ross, Aaron Franklin, Shawn Colvin
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Mary J. Blige, Jas Leverette
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Kevin James, Alyson Hannigan, Al Roker, Faouzia & John Legend
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Kristen Wiig, Jamie Dornan, Annie Mumolo, Nate Berkus, Jeremiah Brent, Mikel Welch
• “Superman & Lois” (CW): Premiere. Superman and Lois’ return to idyllic Smallville is set to be upended by mysterious strangers.
• “Assembly Required” (HISTORY): Premiere. Tim Allen and Richard Karn put the maker’s skills to the test when they have them create an all-season leaf blower that can also melt ice and snow.
• “Unplugged” (MTV): BTS performs a set that includes some tracks from “BE,” plus a few surprises.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Billie Eilish – has filed legal docs seeking a restraining order after being threatened by a man outside her Los Angeles home. She alleges the man has been camping at a school across the street, and sends her disturbing letters.
• Megan Thee Stallion — wants to be remembered as one of the best and most influential rappers of all time. Quote: “I feel like when it’s all said and done, when people want to talk about female rap … they are definitely going to have to put my name up there with the OGs.”
• Green Day – On Sat., they shared the new song (and video) ‘Here Comes the Shock’, which aired during the NHL’s Outdoor Games from Lake Tahoe. The vid features a session of punk-rock aerobics led by singer Hilken Mancini. LINK: https://youtu.be/xVfSN1wjDmE
• Spandau Ballet – Guitarist Gary Kemp is going solo. He has a new single due out in March and a solo album set for release in June. Pink Floyd’s touring bassist Guy Pratt is featured on the recordings, most of which were done remotely due to the pandemic.
• Eddie Van Halen – His ex-wife Valerie Bertinelli says that she has been “grief shamed” over the way she dealt with his death. On “Today”, she said: “We spent a lot of time together. He’s the father of my son. He’s the father of the greatest gift in my life…And I’m allowed to miss him.” The pair split in 2002 after 11 years of marriage.
• Elton John — has embarked on a fitness and diet regime to shed some pounds during lockdown. His filmmaker husband David Furnish said in an interview on “Good Morning Britain”: “He’s been losing weight, he’s been looking after himself really, really well.”
• Corey Hart — has released the moving new single ‘Shoreline’, a collaboration with his daughter Dante. A live acoustic performance filmed in Nassau, Bahamas will follow on March 12th.
• Luke Combs – His apology for his previous use of the Confederate Flag has ignited a polarizing conversation among Country fans and musicians. Some have praised him for speaking about the long-standing issue of racism within the genre, but some are skeptical of his sudden moment of reckoning.
• Morgan Wallen – His “Dangerous: The Double Album” is now spending its sixth week at #1 on the Billboard 200 chart. That’s the most weeks atop the list for a male artist’s album since Drake’s “Views” spent 13 nonconsecutive weeks there in 2016.
• Dolly Parton – is asking NOT to be immortalized on a statue outside the Tennessee State Capitol in Nashville. She said she is “honored and humbled” by the idea, but “given all that is going on in the world, I don’t think putting me on a pedestal is appropriate at this time.”
SHOOTING THE BULL
Finns looking to avoid gyms and other crowded indoor activities because of the pandemic have found a new way to keep fit – running in the snow — wearing no shoes, just thick woolen socks. It seems Finland has seen a lot of snowfall this winter, and its hearty countrymen and women have found that running outside in just socks provides great exercise, and a sense of happiness and freedom. In Finland, in case you aren’t aware, a popular pastime involves taking a sauna, then running through snow to jump into an ice-cold lake, so this isn’t as odd as it may sound. Barefoot running has become popular in the past few years during the warmer months. But running in socks through heavy snow, sometimes up to the knees, takes it to the next level. One expert, in the middle of a group 35k sock run, said the feeling afterwards is “just great”, likening it to that of a “good foot massage”. He recommends wearing at least 2 woolen socks, preferably 3, on each foot.
(Well, I believe him when he says your feet feel good when it’s over. Just like your head feels better when you stop smashing it against a wall!)
(New pickup line. Wanna go running in the snow? I’ll wear my socks. JUST my socks…”)
(Yet another important invention created by drunk people on their way home from a party…)
A survey has found that 70% of couples are currently in the middle of a “bathroom war” with their significant other. For men, the biggest issue is how much hair their partner leaves in the shower drain. Women report that they are most turned off by the mess and smells that he leaves behind in the toilet. According to the study, commissioned by Triton Showers, about a third of people feel their partner does way too much relaxing in the bathroom, and hogs the shower. And some of the biggest pet peeves couples have center around their partner’s toilet habits. Leaving the toilet paper roll empty is the biggest annoyance. Not cleaning the toilet came second. Close behind (no pun intended): Leaving the toilet seat up, and hanging the toilet paper the “wrong way.” Nearly 20% of respondents admitted to ending a relationship because of their ex’s bathroom habits.
(On the plus side, apparently women have no idea that men use the “fancy towels” EVERY TIME WE WASH OUR HANDS!!)
(So just to confirm, the #1 complaint was #2. Do I have that right?)
LIVING THE DREAM:
Scientists say they have come up with a way to communicate with people who are dreaming. Northwestern University researchers have identified a phenomenon they call “interactive dreaming”, where people experience deep sleep as well as lucid dreams, and are able to follow instructions, answer simple yes-or-no questions, and even solve basic math questions. How? Scientists were able to interact with study participants through spoken audio, flashing lights, and physical touch. The sleepers were asked to answer simple maths questions, to count light flashes or physical touches, and to respond to basic questions, like “Can you speak Spanish?”. Answers were given through eye movements or facial muscle movements agreed upon in advance. The study could eventually be used to teach people how to use dreams to help them toward a particular goal, or to treat certain mental health problems.
(Usually when I’m dreaming, my main GOAL is not to be interrupted!)
(I wonder how many of the sleepers answered everything with: “Yes, dear…”)
(If these scientists think this is a new thing, they’ve never had toddlers and a hangover!)
INVENTIONS WE WOULDN’T HAVE WITHOUT SPACE TRAVEL:
With NASA’s Perseverance landing on Mars last week, the age-old debate has once again surfaced: “Why spend all that money to explore other planets, when there are so many problems right here on Earth?” Here are a few reasons. Without space travel, we wouldn’t have . . .
➢ Camera Phones: Today’s tech was developed in the 90s in a quest for scientific quality cameras small enough to fit on spacecraft.
➢ CAT Scans: The Jet Propulsion Laboratory played a lead role in developing the technology, which in turn led to CAT scanners and radiology.
➢ LEDs: Red LEDs are used in space to grow plants, and to heal humans on Earth.
➢ Athletic Shoes: Nike Air trainers wouldn’t exist if a NASA engineer hadn’t pitched the idea when working on space suit technology.
➢ Dust Busters: NASA asked Black & Decker to come up with a lightweight device to collect moon samples. That lead to the Dustbuster in 1979.
➢ Ear Thermometers: NASA and Diatek developed the aural thermometer, which uses infrared astronomy tech to measure the energy emitted by the ear drum.
➢ The Jaws of Life: This uses a mini version of the explosive charge used to separate devices on the Space Shuttle.
➢ Wireless Headsets: NASA developed these to allow astronauts to be hands-free without wires.
➢ Baby Formula: It now contains a nutritional enrichment ingredient which can be traced back to NASA research into the use of algae during space travel.
➢ Portable Computers – and the Computer Mouse: Yup. Inspired by, and developed for space travel.
DID YOU KNOW?
Megan Fox and Angelina Jolie can thank primitive humans for their luscious lips. Dozens of genes that shape a person’s face have been identified by a British led team of scientists. One, named TBX15, is specifically responsible for the lips, and lives on in Pacific islanders and those descended from indigenous Americans. Other celebs with such heritage include Johnny Depp, Jessica Biel, Cameron Diaz, Tiger Woods, Red Hot Chili Peppers’ frontman Anthony Kiedis, and the late Elvis Presley.
BS CHRONOMETER 02.23.21
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1952  Brad Whitford, Winchester MA, rock guitarist (Aerosmith-‘Walk This Way’, ‘Sweet Emotion’)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (2001)
1965  Michael Dell, Houston TX, founder & CEO of Dell Computer/current net worth: $41.8 billion
1970  Niecy Nash, Palmdale CA, TV actress (“Reno 911!” since 2003)
1969  Daymond John, Queens NY, TV personality (“Shark Tank” since 2009)/businessman (CEO of FUBU)
1981  Josh Gad, Hollywood FL, movie actor (“Frozen”, “Jobs”)/Broadway actor (“The Book of Mormon”)
1983  Emily Blunt, London UK, movie actress (“The Girl On the Train”, “The Devil Wears Prada”)/married to John Krasinski since 2010. COMING UP…”Jungle Cruise”, 2021
1983  Aziz Ansari, Columbia SC, TV actor (“Parks & Recreation” 2009-15)/standup comedian (“Live at Madison Square Garden”)
1994  Dakota Fanning, Conyers GA, movie actress (“Twilight Saga”, “The Runaways”) COMING UP…”The Nightingale”, 2021
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Curling is Cool Day”, celebrating the Winter sport of curling … basically a drinking game with some housecleaning interspersed. In tribute, here are . . .
BS REASONS CURLING IS BETTER THAN SEX:
✓ It’s acceptable to play with your best friend’s wife.
✓ You can yell “Hurry, hurry, hard!” without anyone taking much notice.
✓ You can score more than once in each end.
✓ You can do it in 8 houses in less than 2 hours.
✓ You get to shoot your rocks 16 times in just 1 game.
✓ You can use your rubber more than once.
✓ Short is not always bad.
✓ Men don’t fall asleep when play is completed.
✓ The ice-maker always cleans the sheets after you play.
• “Banana Bread Day”, the first cookbooks mentioning banana bread were published during the Great Depression. Culinary historians believe that a resourceful housewife who didn’t want to throw away over-ripe bananas may have invented the original recipe.
• “Dog Biscuit Appreciation Day”. A poll of pet owners found that about ⅓ have eaten dog food at one time or another, most likely just to see what it tastes like (Or to gross out their sister!)
• “Diesel Engine Day”, on this day in 1893, Rudolf Diesel received a patent for his diesel engine. Instead of gasoline, this engine burns fuel oil, and uses compressed air in the cylinder instead of a spark to ignite the fuel.
• “National Rationalization Day”, is about observing the fake reasons or false excuses given for not finishing work, or doing it wrong. Today, we should try to correct the mistakes we’ve made because of rationalization. (How do I get the dog to “un-eat” my homework?)
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] Tortilla Chip Day
[Wed] World Bartender Day
[Thurs] Clam Chowder Day
[Thurs] Chocolate-Covered Peanuts Day
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2013  At the 33rd Golden Raspberry Awards, Rihanna is named ‘Worst Supporting Actress’ for her role in the sci-fi action flick “Battleship”
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2010  Britain’s Culture Ministry declares The Beatles’ Abbey Road Studios in London a protected historic site
2019  Ariana Grande becomes the first solo artist to hold the top 3 spots on the Hot 100 in the same week, a feat previously accomplished only by The Beatles. The songs: #1: ‘7 Rings’ #2: ‘Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I’m Bored’, and #3: ‘Thank U, Next’
TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
1992  Residents of Auckland, New Zealand complete the tallest tower made entirely of LEGO blocks … 65 feet, 2 inches (19.9 m)
2000  Santana wins 8 Grammys for the album “Supernatural”, tying Michael Jackson’s record for the most in a single night
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ The foil used to wrap one day’s production of Hershey’s Kisses would cover 40 football fields.
✓ One acre of peanuts produces enough peanut butter for 30,000 peanut butter sandwiches.
✓ On average, it takes 85 lbs. (38.5kg) of feed to raise a 30-lb. (13.6kg) turkey.
✓ Milk carton spouts didn’t appear until the 1960s. Before then, they had to be cut open.
✓ The New York Stock Exchange started out as a coffeehouse.
✓ Flies spend 30% of their time vomiting.
Best of BS . . .
BS SIGNS YOU’RE GETTING OLD:
• You refer to one of your legs as “My good leg”.
• You need to calculate your age in your head, because you’re just not sure anymore.
• You start 8-12 sentences a day with the words “These damned millennials…”
• That crap your dad always said starts to make sense.
• They keep remaking your movies.
• The Urban Dictionary is your homepage.
• The hot guys all call you “ma’am”.
• Ibuprofen has become a food group.
• Your biggest enemy? Gravity.
• When you fall down at a party, rather than laugh like they used to, people panic & run to help you.
• 50 shades of grey is your hair, not your sex life.
-Twitter, first published in ‘BS’ in 2018
TODAY’S SLICE OF BS:
➠ Antidepressant use amongst pets is on the rise. Vets say pets need meds when they start acting distant, lazy, and disobedient. (Which, of course, begs the question: how do you know when cats need meds?)
➠ Kylie Jenner just got her hands on a pair of viral “Birkinstocks,” made from Hermès Birkin bags, for a whopping $76,000! (Not sure about you, but it’s so nice to see Kylie FINALLY rewarding herself for a lifetime of hard work.)
➠ Kendall Jenner showed-off her nude bottom for ‘sister Kim’s’ SKIMS lingerie shoot. (Caitlyn was so humiliated that she buried what’s-left-of-her-face in her hands…)
➠ A French nun who is believed to be the world’s second-oldest person at 117, just survived a bout with COVID-19 and celebrated her birthday. (You can still get her a gift, but hurry.)
➠ The U.S. Border Patrol seized over $2 million dollars worth of cocaine stuffed inside Corn Flakes cereal boxes. (Wow! Cocaine and Corn Flakes — how good would your bowel movements be after THAT combo?)
BS WEB GOODIE:
Hap, hap, happy doggie (sound up): https://tinyurl.com/1qi8sp1f
BS RANDOM JOKE:
If I had to describe myself in one word, it would be “unable to follow directions”.
BS PHONE STARTER:
What is the most outrageous thing that you have seen someone do while behind the wheel?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: Women need 6 of THESE, and men need 4 before they are satisfied. What are they?
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Everyone knows how to raise children…except the people who have them.