Thursday, May 27, 2021 — Edition: #6995
Sheet For Brains!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Amazon is investing even more heavily in growing its position in the entertainment world. The company has announced it has made a deal to acquire MGM, the home of ‘James Bond’ and one of the most iconic movie studios in Hollywood. The $8.45 billion deal gives Amazon an extensive library of film and TV shows that it can use to fill out its Prime Video content coffers. MGM has a catalog with more than 4,000 films and 17,000 TV shows. The two companies said that the completion of the deal “is subject to regulatory approvals and other customary closing conditions.”
★ The 2021 Daytime Emmy nominations have been announced, with Alex Trebek and Larry King earning posthumous nods. The late “Jeopardy!” host is up for Outstanding Game Show Host alongside Wayne Brady, Steve Harvey, Alfonso Ribeiro and Pat Sajak. Notably, “Jeopardy!” was not nominated for Outstanding Game Show. Trebek has won the Outstanding Game Show Host Emmy for “Jeopardy” 7 times and is the most-nominated host in the category with 31 nods. King is up for Outstanding Informational Talk Show Host.
★ It’s no secret that Scott Disick loves a lavish lifestyle (he did get knighted as ‘Lord Disick’, after all). So, when it was time to find the most luxurious party favors to give his friends and family at his 38th birthday celebration, Disick didn’t disappoint, giving out Rolex watches to his guests. In an Instagram Story, Kim Kardashian says: “I’ve never heard of this before, party favors like this. These are Scott’s party favors you guys” The vid shows her panning across a table covered in diamond necklaces and Rolex watches.
★ Showtime has ordered an anthology series with the first season set to tackle the rise of ride-sharing app Uber. Joseph Gordon-Levitt will star. Each season will explore a story that rocked the business world and changed culture. Season 1 is based on Mike Isaac’s book “Super Pumped: The Battle for Uber” and will depict the roller-coaster ride of the upstart transportation company. Gordon-Levitt will star as Uber’s first CEO and co-founder Travis Kalanick, who was ultimately ousted in a boardroom coup.
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Emma Stone, Rory Scovel, Chloe Moriondo
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Michael Douglas, Billy Porter, Mustafa
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Bradley Whitford, Carlos Watson
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Joel Edgerton
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Emily Blunt, Elle King
• “Conan” (TBS): Russell Brand (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Dennis Quaid
• “The Talk” (CBS): Yvonne Orji, guest co-host Jerry O’Connell
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Shania Twain, Tony Hale, “American Idol” runner-up Willie Spence
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Chris Pratt, Melissa King
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Gordon Ramsay, Jessie Ennis
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Best of Co-Stars: Cameron Diaz, Lucy Liu, Jimmy Fallon, Chris O’Donnell, Whoopi Goldberg, Jessica Alba
• “Red Nose Day” (NBC): The sixth annual special will showcase a night of music, comedy and some of Hollywood’s biggest names.
• “2021 iHeartRadio Music Awards” (FOX): Honoring the year’s most popular music artists; Performances by The Weeknd, Ariana Grande, Bruno Mars & Anderson Paak, Dan + Shay and Doja Cat; Usher hosts.
• “Friends: The Reunion”(HBO Max): The cast of the 1990s TV hit finally reunites to celebrate themselves. Joining them are celeb fans and guest stars including Reese Witherspoon, Tom Selleck, Lady Gaga, Justin Bieber, David Beckham, James Corden, Elliott Gould, Mindy Kaling, Malala Yousafzai, and BTS. (***See “BS Fake Friends Reunion Facts”, below***)
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Lil Nas X — During his appearance on “The Tonight Show”, he shared the background story on his “SNL” wardrobe malfunction that’s been viewed 2.5 million times on YouTube. Quote: “I was pretty much going down the pole, you know, doing my little sexy drop-down, and boom—I feel air. I was like, ‘Okay, there’s definitely a breeze going on.'”
• Akon – His SUV was stolen from a gas station in Atlanta on Tuesday. According to police, shortly after midnight, someone stole the singer’s Range Rover while he was pumping gas.
• Maroon 5 – will release their 7th album “Jordi” on June 11. It will feature collaborations with posthumous artists Juice WRLD in ‘Can’t Leave You Alone’, and Nipsey Hussle on the remix of ‘Memories’. It will also feature include the previously released single ‘Beautiful Mistakes’ with Megan Thee Stallion. The title, Jordi, pays tribute to late longtime manager Jordan Feldstein, who died in 2017.
• Robert Plant – says he has instructed his children to make his personal archive available for free when he dies. During lockdown, he has organized “All the adventures that I’ve ever had with music and tours, album releases, projects that didn’t actually get finished or whatever it is”. Plant says he itemized them all, and “told the kids when I kick the bucket, open it to the public free of charge.”
• The Who – are being honored with commemorative coins by The Royal Mint. They are joining Queen, Sir Elton John and David Bowie, who have all been recognized as part of the UK coinmakers’ “Music Legends” series. The design features a union flag, Mod logo and speaker-smashing Rickenbacker guitar in the form of a pinball table, a nod to their 1969 hit ‘Pinball Wizard’.
• Richard Marx – US Sen. Rand Paul is blaming him (!) after a suspicious package filled with a white powder was delivered to his home, with an illustration of Paul in a neck brace and the message: “I’ll finish what your neighbor started.” Paul linked that to a tweet in which Marx offered to buy a drink and hug a neighbor who shattered some of the senator’s ribs during a fight over lawn care in 2017.
• Ty Herndon – has been producing the Concert for Love and Acceptance since 2015, and he’s got big plans for this year. The 2021 show, set for June 30, boasts a star-studded lineup of appearances and performances from Brothers Osborne, Brooke Eden, Kristin Chenoweth, Terri Clark, LoCash, Kathy Mattea, Rissi Palmer, Gretchen Peters, Tenille Townes, Walker County and Chase Wright.
• Brandi Carlile – will be among the artists honoring Elton John at tonight’s iHeartRadio Music Awards, along with HER and Demi Lovato. John will be the second-ever recipient of the iHeartRadio Icon Award, following Bon Jovi three years ago.
• Alan Jackson – his latest album “Where Have You Gone”, has not only reached #1 on the Country album chart in the US, but in the UK, Australia and Canada as well. It is also his 15th Top 10 album on the all-genre Billboard 200 chart.
SHOOTING THE BULL
CALLING ALL PROSPECTIVE WORKERS:
One McDonald’s restaurant is attempting to deal with the labor shortage in a creative way: By offering free iPhones to new employees. Twitter user Bregard posted a photo of a McDonalds with the comment: “LMFAO MCDONALDS IS STARVING.” The photo shows the restaurant with a flyer in the window stating that it is offering a free iPhone to new employees who “meet employment criteria” and are employed there for 6 months. The post has been liked over 225 thousand times and retweeted over 35 thousand times. The flyer also does not state what model of iPhone or condition a new employee would receive if they met both criteria. No word either on where the McD’s is located. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/b939a6tt
(Oh, MY kid will find it!)
(Good plan. That way, new employees can’t text in sick for the first 6 months!)
(Did they mention if the person also gets paid?)
Listening to stories reduces pain in children, according to a new study. Many children’s hospitals already have storytelling programs that aim to cheer up patients. But this research, published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, suggests that it also has physiological benefits. Brazilian researcher Dr. Jorge Moll says that until now, the positive evidence for storytelling was based on ‘common sense’, the thinking being that interacting with a child may distract, entertain and alleviate suffering. But his team determined through a series of sessions with children aged 2-7 in intensive care that those who took part in a storytelling group experienced decreases in pain levels and stress hormones at twice the rate of a control group who were told riddles instead. The team plans to conduct the same experiment among other patient groups.
(Also effective: Cookies!)
(Maybe they told the control group stupid jokes?)
(I don’t want to refute the value of this research, but isn’t it ironic that kids sometimes tell the longest, most painful stories you’ll ever hear?)
WAG THE DUDE:
A company is selling “tails for people”, because . . . well . . . because people will buy them. In case you didn’t know there is a market for naturally moving tails for humans, the Tail Company has been in the business of creating realistic human tails for over 15 years. Its latest creation, the miTail, launched on Kickstarter 2 weeks ago and was funded in under 2 hours. The “miTail”, an animatronic tail for humans, can move all by itself or via smartphone commands. The app allows users to select from a variety of options, but because controlling the tail with manual commands can be tedious, the miTail no-phone mode will give it a life of its own, moving by itself at different speeds, with random motions, emulating a real tail. The line of lifelike tails is expected to begin shipping this August. They “re-tail” at $150 and up.
(You know what they say: “Behind every great man…is a tail?”)
(This explains a LOT about my last blind date!)
(How can they NOT go with the slogan; “Get yourself some tail!”?
MYTHBUSTERS: SUNSCREEN EDITION
Today is ‘Sunscreen Protection Day’. The statements below, contrary to what you have probably been told, are all myths:
• Dark skin doesn’t need sunscreen/can’t get melanoma: Darker skin tones are less prone to skin cancer, but this can mean signs are ignored until there’s a lesion so far advanced that chances of successful treatment are diminished.
• A base tan protects you: A base tan is nature’s way of producing sun protection because you’ve been irradiated. But it doesn’t lessen your risk of skin cancer, and you’ll age your skin faster with constant sun tanning.
• You don’t need to use sunscreen inside: All contact with sunlight requires protection. Even exposure through an office or car window and walking from building to building.
• The number on sunscreen is proportionate to the number of minutes of sun protection: Nope — it’s about the strength of protection against the sun’s harmful rays. Sun Protection Factor (SPF) is a measure of how much solar energy (UV radiation) is required to burn protected skin. Here’s how to do the math — SPF 15 allows 1/15 of harmful UVB rays to reach the skin. The remaining 14/15 means you’re protecting against 93% of UVB radiation. So, SPF 30 blocks 97% and SPF 50 prevents 98%. (OK you got me there…I thought that one was true!)
• The SPF in makeup is enough: It’s good enough to cover you when you’re walking from your car to work. If you’re outside longer than 15 minutes, you need higher SPF and must reapply.
• One application of sunscreen in the morning is enough for the whole day: Reapplying is just as important as the first coat. Sunscreen gets consumed once the light hits it, which means you have to reapply regularly to remain protected.
• You don’t need sunscreen during off-peak hours: The sun’s rays can cause damage no matter what time it is. If you’re outside at any point for longer than 15 minutes, you need SPF. You can still get burned at 8 am as well as after 4 pm. (So why can’t I seem to TAN then??)
• Sunscreen on your face, arms, back, and legs is enough: That’s a great start, but you should also apply it to the ears, nose, hands and the tops of your feet. And remember your scalp, especially if you have thinning or less hair. (That’s what my fishing hat is for!)
• Melanoma is only caused by sun exposure: Melanoma can strike without sun exposure, which makes regular skin checks important. Sun exposure does make the risk higher.
(See you at the beach this summer…if we recognize each other with all the sunscreen and extra clothing on! Oh, yeah, and our masks!)
FUNNIEST TWEETS OF THE WEEK FROM WOMEN:
⇒ Someone told me signing my emails with “Best” is passive aggressive so I’m changing it to “See you in hell” to eliminate any confusion — Angela
⇒ *me hearing a girl say the most insane thing I’ve ever heard:* “No, exactly!” – KILLER MEG
⇒ My toddler is walking around with some sort of chocolate and I’m worried about where she got it from but I’m also worried she got the last one. – Jessie
⇒ for a small fee i will show up pregnant at your ex’s wedding and yell STOP THE WEDDING! – Lizz Adams
…AND A FEW FROM DUDES:
⇒Tonight my 4 year old said I made the best ever pizza he’s ever ever had, so if you think I’m taking the credit for a cheap supermarket own brand frozen pizza you’ll be correct – ThreeTimeDaddy
⇒ If I was stuck on a desert island with only one record, I would want it to be the record for being able to swim the farthest. – Guy Endore-Kaiser
DID YOU KNOW?
A TikTok user claims there is a better word than “cheese” to say when you’re having your picture taken, which will give you a much more natural, photogenic smile. RJ – or @rjthemagician – says we should use the word “yeah” when looking into the camera. In a clip, he explains that the tip actually came from Oprah Winfrey. He demonstrated by sharing a photo of himself back when he was still saying “cheese” and then a more recent photo where he was saying “yeah”. RJ’s smile looks a lot more natural and less forced than the earlier snap. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/3m5c35yj
BS CHRONOMETER 05.27.21
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1936  Louis Gossett Jr, Brooklyn NY, movie actor (Oscar- “An Officer and a Gentleman”)/TV actor (Emmy-“Roots”)
1945  Bruce Cockburn, Ottawa ON, folk-rock singer songwriter (‘Lovers in a Dangerous Time’, ‘If I Had a Rocket Launcher’)
1958  Neil Finn, Te Awamutu New Zealand, singer-guitarist (Split Enz -‘I Got You’, Crowded House-‘Don’t Dream Its Over’)/current member of Fleetwood Mac
1965  Todd Bridges, San Francisco CA, TV actor (‘Willis’ on “Diff’rent Strokes” 1978-1986)
1966  Sean Kinney, Renton WA, rock drummer (Alice in Chains-‘Rooster’, ‘Man in the Box’)
1970  Joseph Fiennes, Wiltshire UK, TV actor (“The Handmaid’s Tale” since 2017, “Flashforward” 2009-2010)/brother of Ralph Fiennes
1971  Paul Bettany, London UK, movie actor (“Iron Man 2”, “The Da Vinci Code”)/TV actor (“WandaVision” 2021)
1973  Jack McBrayer, Macon GA, TV actor (“30 Rock” 2006-13, “The Middle” 2013-18)
1975  André 3000 (Benjamin), Atlanta GA, rapper (OutKast-‘Hey Ya!’, ‘The Way You Move’)/TV actor (“Dispatches From Elsewhere” since 2020)
1975  Jamie Oliver, Clavering UK, celebrity TV chef (“Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution”, “Jamie’s Kitchen”, “The Naked Chef”, etc.)
1980  Ben Feldman, Washington DC, TV actor (“Superstore” since 2015, “Mad Men” 2012-14)
1990  Chris Colfer, Clovis CA, TV actor (“Glee” 2009-15)
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Cellophane Tape Day”, marking the date in 1930 that a patent for the product was granted to Richard Drew. His invention was later marketed by 3M as ‘Scotch’ tape. Mr. Drew also invented masking tape. (I had a book about him. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find the beginning…)
• “Grape Popsicle Day”, a salute to one of the favorite flavors of the frozen treat. Also, messiest.
• “Sunscreen Protection Day”, to create awareness of the importance of using protection against the harmful UV rays from the Sun. (***See “Mythbusters: Sunscreen Edition”, above***)
• “Nothing To Fear Day”, it’s a chance to stand up and declare, as President Franklin D. Roosevelt did on May 27, 1941 that, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself,” and take back control of our lives. (He forgot about spiders…)
• “Red Nose Day”, a campaign with the mission to end child poverty by funding programs that keep children safe, healthy, educated and empowered. People join together today to laugh and have fun. Since its debut in 2015, Red Nose Day has raised over $240 million to help over 25 million children. LINK: https://rednoseday.org/
COMING UP . . .
[Fri] Amnesty International Day
[Fri] National Brisket Day
[Sat] International Coq Au Vin Day
[Sat] Paper Clip Day
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2003  Angelina Jolie divorces Billy Bob Thornton due to irreconcilable differences
2006  Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt welcome their first biological child, a daughter named Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt, while staying at a compound in Swakopmund, Namibia
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2004  The Bee Gees are made Commanders of the Order of the British Empire by Prince Charles at Buckingham Palace; Maurice’s son Adam accepts on behalf of his father, who died 6 months earlier
2017  Gregg Allman of The Allman Brothers Band dies at 69 after a battle with liver cancer.
2017  ‘Despacito’ by Luis Fonsi and Daddy Yankee featuring Justin Bieber tops the Hot 100, becoming the first #1 sung mostly in Spanish since ‘Macarena’ in 1996.
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2014  Google unveils its self-driving car, a prototype that can travel 25 mph and safely respond to a variety of situations
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ Bread goes stale in the fridge six times faster than at room temperature.
✓ When scientists developed straight bananas in the 1960s, the public refused to buy them.
✓ Given the choice, mice prefer sweets and carbs over cheese.
✓ Jesse James issued his own press releases.
✓ ‘Trimethylaminuria’ is a rare genetic disorder that makes a person smell like rotting fish.
✓ Gibraltar Airport’s runway crosses a major highway. Traffic stops when planes take off or land.
Best of BS . . .
BS FAKE “FRIENDS” REUNION FACTS:
• Chandler now operates a marijuana distribution business called “Bing Bong”.
• Central Perk is now a Starbucks.
• Watch for a special appearance by Monica’s original face.
• Joey has become a professional counselor who starts every session by saying: “How you doin’?”
• Rachel returns with a shaved head, because no one ever liked her hairstyle.
• They were on a break.
• New theme song: ‘Smelly Cat’.
• It will be revealed that Phoebe and Ursula aren’t related.
• Because it airs on HBO, we finally get to see the Ugly Naked Guy.
• Angelina Jolie will be replacing Jennifer Aniston.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2020
TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS . . .
➠ A recent “Wheel of Fortune” contestant became the first in the show’s history to win a house. (If you’d like to hear more about this stunning historic achievement, block off 6 hours and then call up my grandmother…)
➠ An 84-year-old woman just graduated from Georgetown College. (Which means, in order to pay off her student loans, she’ll have to live to 134!)
➠ An Ice Cream truck driver was attacked and assaulted at a National City, California, gas station over the weekend. (The attacker was arrested, while the ice cream truck vendor was left licking his wounds.)
➠ The body of a man was discovered dead inside of a dinosaur statue. (They had to cut him out with a Dino-saw.) [Rim Shot!]
➠ SAT scores in the US are at their lowest levels in 40 years. (“Wow. That’s like an eight-decade low,” said students.)
BS WEB GOODIE:
End of the day: https://fb.watch/5IMKJaS34f/
BS PHONE STARTER:
If you could spend a day in someone else’s shoes, whose would they be? And why?
BS RANDOM JOKE:
Why are the elderly often called “old people”, but children are never called “new people”?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: It’s frowned upon, but nearly 80% of people admit they do THIS at work. What is it?
Answer: Use emojis
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived, or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?