Wednesday, November 25, 2020 – Edition: #6858
Get a Load of This Sheet!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ The new Academy Museum of Motion Pictures in Hollywood has completed the installation of an exhibit that viewers can really sink their teeth into: the only surviving full-scale shark model from Steven Spielberg’s 1975 blockbuster “Jaws.” The 25-foot long, 1200-pound model is suspended 30 feet above the third floor of the building and is the largest object in the museum’s collection to date. It is the only surviving version of the shark derived from the original “Jaws” mold, which Spielberg nicknamed “Bruce” during production of the movie. (They’re gonna need a bigger museum!)
★ Aussie cinema royalty Russell Crowe and Nicole Kidman have been crowned king and queen of the Australian Academy of Cinema and Television Arts. The pair are taking up the roles of President (Crowe) and Vice President (Kidman) of the AACTA, overseeing an organization that helped to further their careers when they won their first AACTA prizes in 1991 and 1987, respectively. The Oscar-winning duo will use their positions to nurture talent in Australia as well as continuing to grow the AACTA internationally and promote the Australian biz abroad.
★ The day after Thanksgiving, comedian and ventriloquist Jeff Dunham will debut his 10th special. “Jeff Dunham’s Completely Unrehearsed Last-Minute Pandemic Holiday Special” is not like his previous releases, though, considering that he recorded it in front of a socially-distanced crowd wearing masks. He also headed to the stage without testing roughly 99% of his bits, but according to him, “I’ve been on stage for 50 years now, and I think I have a pretty good barometer of what will make people laugh and what won’t. We just went for it.” The special premieres on Comedy Central Friday and will be available for free on the Comedy Central app beginning Dec. 13.
★ Netflix isn’t the only one that’s reaped benefits from the word-of-mouth success of “The Queen’s Gambit”. Online marketplaces like eBay and game and toy companies are riding the show’s growing cultural impact to spikes in sales for chess sets and boards of 1000% or more. According to a toy analyst, “Six months ago…these retailers weren’t saying, let’s load up on chess sets. Good luck finding a chess set this holiday!” The show focuses on a young chess prodigy (Anya Taylor-Joy), who grapples with addiction in her quest to become the best chess player in a male-dominated arena.
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Melissa McCarthy, the original cast of “Saved by the Bell”, Sheryl Crow
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): John Oliver, Joe Buck
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Chris Rock, Rauw Alejandro featuring J Balvin
• “Conan” (TBS): Conan Without Borders: Made in Mexico, with Diego Luna, Vicente Fox (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Joe Scarborough, Mika Brzezinski, Garth Brooks
• “The Talk” (CBS): David Boreanaz, Christopher Jackson, guest co-host Elaine Welteroth
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Amy Adams
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Josh Duhamel
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Melissa McCarthy, Ben Falcone, Jean Smart
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Kelly Rowland, Shannon Lee, Jill Kargman
• “Women of Worth” (NBC): Viola Davis, Eva Longoria, Camila Cabello and other stars share their appreciation for everyday women dedicated to uplifting their communities by honoring their personal journeys and extraordinary efforts to make a difference in the world.
• “A Saturday Night Live Thanksgiving” (NBC): Thanksgiving-themed sketches including “A Thanksgiving Miracle”, “The Bird Family”, “Adam Sandler’s Thanksgiving Song”, and more.
• “Good Morning Christmas!” (HALLMARK): Two competing TV hosts travel to a small town over Christmas, and while pretending to get along for the sake of appearances, they slowly discover there is more to each other than they thought.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Drake – is teasing a collaboration with Nike. On Instagram, he shared a clip of the top-secret project, which ended with the Nike logo and the date 18.12.2020. They recently teamed up on some merch to celebrate the upcoming release of his album, “Certified Lover Boy”, which is due out in January.
• Taylor Swift – in winning 3 American Music Awards Sunday night, she extended her lead as the artist with the most awards in the show’s 47-year history. She has now won 32 AMAs, eight more than Michael Jackson. Justin Bieber has now won 18, putting him in sixth place on the all-time winners list.
• Kelly Rowland – Her new single ‘Hitman’ will be included in the NFL’s 2020 Songs of the Season series, which incorporates music of every genre into broadcasts. The series supports the NFL’s social justice initiative “Inspire Change”, to reduce barriers in education, economic advancement, police and community relations and criminal justice reform.
• Bon Jovi – Their new concert documentary “On a Night Like This – Bon Jovi 2020” will stream for free on the band’s Facebook page beginning Friday. It was filmed in an intimate setting in Nashville as the band assembled to perform their new album “2020” together for the first time.
• Van Halen — Eddie Van Halen’s old 2000 Ferrari 550 (with just 28,000 miles on it) is hitting the auction block at GottaHaveRockandRoll.com. Bidding starts today and runs through Dec. 4. It’s expected to sell for $250,000-350,000.
• Brett Young, Dolly Parton, Lauren Alaina, and Jimmie Allen — will all perform as part of tomorrow’s 2020 Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. Allen will be joined by Noah Cyrus. Other performers at the broadcast-only parade include: Bebe Rexha, Jordin Sparks, Ally Brooke, Sofia Carson, Jimmy Fallon and the Roots, the Muppets of Sesame Street, Tori Kelly, Patti LaBelle, Leslie Odom Jr. and Pentatonix.
• Florida Georgia Line – have become the first country artist to notch two Diamond singles. Their 2012 breakout single ‘Cruise’ and their 2017 Bebe Rexha collaboration ‘Meant to Be’ have both been officially certified by the Recording Industry Association of America for 10 million equivalent units, combining actual sales and equivalent units comprised of streams.
• Kenny Rogers – His estate has filed a lawsuit against the late singer’s employee and friend Kelly Junkermann, claiming that he produced an unauthorized DVD of Rogers’ farewell tour. The estate claims he made a deal with a distributor even though he knew he did not have permission to do so.
It’s been such a crazy year that just one word could never do it justice. In their new report, the Oxford English Dictionary says “It quickly became apparent that 2020 is not a year that could neatly be accommodated in one single ‘word of the year’” And “What was genuinely unprecedented this year was the hyper-speed at which the English-speaking world amassed a new collective vocabulary relating to the coronavirus”. So, we present 2020’s Oxford WORDS of the Year – in chronological order:
March: “lockdown”, social distancing” and “reopening”
Summer: “Black Lives Matter”, “BIPOC” (an abbreviation for “Black, indigenous and other people of color.”), and “cancel culture”
August: “mail-in”, “Belarusian” (a reference to the controversial election in Belarus)
September: “moonshot” (the name the UK government gave to its coronavirus testing program)
October: “superspreader”, “net zero” (refers to China’s pledge to be carbon neutral by 2060)
(What’s your word of 2020? We’re going with “Quarantini”!)
HERE’S WHAT’S NEW UNDER THE SUN:
While reusable cloth face masks may be comfortable, you have to admit that it’s kind of a pain to have to wash them. Now, a team from the University of California has developed a new type of cloth that they say can kill viruses and bacteria simply by being left out in the sun. Their specially treated cotton face mask can kill up to 99.999% of viruses with less than one hour of sunlight exposure. Most cloth masks filter out tiny droplets from a cough or sneeze, but living bacteria and virus particles can attach themselves to cloth and remain contagious to anyone who touches them. This new antimicrobial fabric releases a what is called a “reactive oxygen species” when exposed to light and sanitizes it within 30 minutes. The researchers say in addition to face masks, their new invention shows promise for creating reusable and antiviral clothing during the pandemic.
(Will the mask still smell like my breath, though?)
(I’m glad they’ve come up with this now, right on time for us not seeing the sun for 4 months…)
(So, you can take your disposable masks and stick ’em where the sun don’t shine!)
Advocacy group ‘World Against Toys Causing Harm’ (WATCH) has published its 48th annual list of toys that could be dangerous to kids. Here is this year’s Top-10:
1. Calico Critters Nursery Friends: These cute critters include small parts, such as a pacifier, with the potential for choking injuries.
2. Toysmith Missile Launcher: Despite its claims to be able to “soar up to 75ft”, there are no warnings of potential for eye or facial injuries, and the packaging shows the product launching near a child’s face.
3. Marvel Avengers Vibranium Power FX Claw: These rigid claws, “inspired” by Black Panther are aimed at kids as young as 5, and have the potential of causing eye and facial injuries.
4. Gloria Owl: This plush owl is sold for babies, but even the manufacturer warns that its long, fiber-like hair may not be adequately rooted, and is prone to “shredding”. Potential for ingestion or aspiration injuries.
5. WWE Jumbo Superstar Fists: These “jumbo” fists are sold to enable 3-year-old children to emulate pro wrestlers. No warnings or cautions are provided regarding the potential for blunt force or impact injuries.
6. Scientific Explorer Sci-Fi Slime: This “supreme slime lab” is marketed for children to create things identified as “magnetic”, “atomic”, and other types of “slimes”. There are numerous warnings of chemical-related injuries, including “may cause eye, skin, and respiratory irritation. Harmful if swallowed….”
7. The Original Boomerang Interactive Stunt UFO: Children are encouraged to “PERFORM AMAZING STUNTS & TRICKS!” by “tossing” it into the air. Despite warning about potential propeller “damage”, the manufacturer urges users to play “catch” by “passing the UFO back and forth to friends….”
8. Boom City Racers Starter Pack: Sold with a ripcord “launcher” so children as young as 4 can “RIP, RACE, [and] EXPLODE!” these miniature vehicles. Potential for eye and face injuries.
9. My Sweet Love Lots to Love Minis: This “mini” baby comes with a feeding set. It is sold for 2-year-olds, but the rigid plastic spoon could be ingested or cause choking.
10. Star Wars Mandalorian Darksaber: Young children are encouraged to “SWING FOR BATTLE….!” But this “ancient, black bladed lightsaber” is made of rigid plastic, with the potential for facial and other impact injuries.
OTHER BS UNSAFE TOYS:
• “Little Mountie Taser Kit”
• “Ronco’s Pocket Hive”
• “The Used Band-Aid Ball”
• “Roof Ranger Paratrooper Kit”
• “Little Mr. Trenchcoat”
• “Mattel’s Cement Floaties”
• “My First Nipple Ring”
DID YOU KNOW?
According to new research, the average person starts feeling old at the age of 47. Similarly, we start to really worry about age-related bodily changes at around 50 years old. The survey of 2,000 people over 40 in the US found that, perhaps surprisingly, most participants aren’t terribly concerned about losing their youthful looks. But one in four say they’re concerned they’ll lose touch with what’s “hip and cool” once they’re elderly.
BS CHRONOMETER 11.25.20
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1944  Ben Stein, Washington DC, move actor (“Ferris Bueller’s Day Off”)/Game show host (“Win Ben Stein’s Money)
1955  Bruno Tonioli, Ferrara Italy, TV personality (ABC “Dancing With the Stars” judge since 2005, BBC “Strictly Come Dancing” judge since 2004)
1960  Amy Grant, Augusta GA, country-pop-gospel singer (‘Baby Baby’, ‘Simple Things’)/6-time Grammy winner/over 22 million albums sold/married to Vince Gill since 2000
1971  Christina Applegate, Hollywood CA, TV actress (“Dead to Me” since 2019, “Married with Children” 1987-97)/movie actress (“Anchorman” movies)
1975  Kristian Nairn, Lisburn Northern Ireland, 6′-10¾” TV actor (‘Hodor’ on “Game of Thrones” 2011-16)
1983  Joey ‘Jaws’ Chestnut, Vallejo CA, competitive eater (currently ranked #1 in the world by the International Federation of Competitive Eating) NET: http://majorleagueeating.com/rankings.php
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Shopping Reminder Day”, marking exactly 1 month until Christmas Day. Just what you wanted to hear, huh?
• “Parfait Day”, saluting the yummy treat that’s concocted from layers of ice cream, whipped cream, and any combination of syrups and fruits. Yes, it’s basically a fancy word for a sundae … likely because it’s usually served in a fancy glass.
• “International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women”, initiated by activists in 1981 and adopted by the UN in 1999 to help raise awareness of this worldwide problem.
• “Blasé Day”, a perfect day for the world-weary to revel in their apathy. (Eh, who cares.)
• “Jukebox Day”, the name jukebox is thought to originate from places called ‘juke houses’ or ‘juke joints.’ In the early 1900s, people congregated in these establishments to drink and listen to music.
• “Blackout Wednesday”, sometimes referred to as “Drinksgiving”, takes place the night before Thanksgiving Day, and in some parts of the US, it’s one of the biggest drinking and party nights of the year. . (Enjoy your Thanksgiving meal with a side of Aspirin tomorrow!)
COMING UP . . .
[Thurs] Good Grief Day
[Thurs] American Thanksgiving Day
[Fri] Black Friday
[Fri] Buy Nothing Day
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2002  Actor and major Elvis fan Nicholas Cage files for divorce from Lisa Marie Presley (Elvis’ daughter) after less than 4 months, citing ‘irreconcilable differences’
2004  Dan Rather announces he’ll step down as anchorman of “CBS Evening News” in March 2005 (leads to the 2015 film “Truth”, starring Robert Redford as Rather)
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1984  In London, Bono, George Michael, David Bowie, Phil Collins, Paul McCartney and a host of other stars record vocals for ‘Do They Know It’s Christmas?’, the song, credited to Band Aid, is the first big all-star charity single.
2013  Disney releases “Frozen: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack” (Grammy Award for Best Compilation Soundtrack for Visual Media 2015, 2014 Billboard Album of the Year)
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1867  Chemist Alfred Nobel patents dynamite as an alternative to highly unstable nitroglycerin. He would later use his will to establish Nobel Prizes “to those who, during the preceding year, have conferred the greatest benefit to humankind”.
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2013  In its opening weekend “The Hunger Games: Catching Fire” grosses $158 million domestically, becoming the most successful film ever released to date in November
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ On average, males spend 11.4 minutes in the shower, females spend 13 minutes.
✓ The little bumpers on the underside of a toilet seat are called ‘buculets’.
✓ Most toilets flush in the key of E-Flat.
✓ Dark roasted coffee is weaker than medium roast. Roasting burns off caffeine.
✓ The year on a bottle of wine refers to when the grapes were picked, not when the wine was bottled.
✓ Giraffes are the only animals born with horns. (Ouch!)
BS WHACK TURKEY FACTS:
✓ A baby turkey is called a ‘poult’. A turkey under 16 weeks of age is called a ‘fryer’.
✓ That flesh-like appendage that hangs over a turkey’s beak is called the ‘snood’. The ‘wattle’ is the bright red appendage on the neck.
✓ A 15 lb turkey usually has about 70% white meat and 30% dark meat.
✓ Commercially raised turkeys are too heavy to fly. In fact, turkey breeding has caused turkey breasts to grow so large that turkeys sometimes fall over.
✓ Male turkeys gobble. Hens do not. They make a clicking noise.
✓ Turkish turkeys don’t gobble. They say “gloo-gloo”.
-University of Illinois
Best of BS . . .
BS HOW TO RECOGNIZE A TURKEY:
• By the way it’s dressed.
• It is drinking out of a gobble-let.
• I’m not sure, but if it contains a bag of giblets, there’s a pretty good chance that’s it.
• You were bowling and got 3 strikes in a row.
• It is not crossing the road.
• Looks like the label on the 25 empty bottles in the back of Uncle Ernie’s pick-up.
• It has a tendency to talk “jive”.
• Open up your “maps” app and see if you are anywhere near Istanbul.
• It’s the big brown lumpy stuff in the giant 70s retro Tupperware container sitting in the back of the fridge, oozing penicillin.
• It puts pineapple on pizza.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2018
BS WAYS TO RUIN A JOB INTERVIEW:
• Park in the boss’s spot.
• Wear PJs
• Bring your kids.
• Speak exclusively in Pig Latin.
• Ask if anyone pays attention to when people show up and leave.
• Do repeated 360s in the swivel chair.
• Wear a mask – a Halloween mask
• Show them your Twitter account.
• Ask if a sperm sample is required.
• Be yourself.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2019
TODAY’S SLICE OF BS:
➠ Tomorrow is US Thanksgiving. (When you can stuff yourself with turkey and cranberry sauce as a healthy alternative to your usual routine of stuffing yourself with pizza and nachos.)
➠ Taco Bell’s Toasted Cheddar Chalupa is coming back to the menu. (“I won’t order them because they’re full of fat and high in calories,” said NOT ONE regular Taco Bell customer…)
➠ AAA calls Thanksgiving the busiest travel day of the year. (Which reminds me just how much I hate going through TSA at the airport. My biggest fear is that someone will post naked pics of my body online. Because that’s iCloud’s job!)
➠ Tomorrow is US Thanksgiving and there’s so much to be thankful for. (Unless you are Newsmax or One America News…)
➠ The full moon coming up on November 30th is called a “beaver moon”. (Astronomers haven’t been able to explain why it’s called a beaver moon because they can’t stop snickering!)
➠ Fact of the Day- If you commit ANY crime at sea, you’re considered a Pirate! (So, back in ’02 when my snotty cousin peed in a snorkel then pooped in my aunt’s flip flop while yachting in the Bahamas, we could have given him a way worse punishment than grounding him from using the jet ski?)
BS WEB GOODIES:
Picking up birds: https://tinyurl.com/y2tzbcb5
’Tis the season (***Caution: lyrics***): https://tinyurl.com/mre25zs
TRUTH OR BS:
Some of these statement are true, some total BS. Which are which?
• ‘Tsunami’ is the Japanese word for a city. [BS – it comes from words meaning ‘harbor’ and ‘wave’]
• English is the most-commonly spoken language. [BS – Mandarin Chinese is]
• Polo is a sport played on horseback [TRUE]
• Calamari is a Greek dish made from beef. [BS – it’s squid]
• Lizzo’s real name is Melissa Jefferson [TRUE – the nickname came after she formed a rap group at age 14.]
• A meter is longer than a yard. [TRUE – One meter equals 1.09 yards]
• Fish cannot blink. [TRUE]
• A tiger has stripes on its skin [TRUE]
-TrueorFalse?, Cosmopolitan, IAEA
BS RANDOM JOKES:
If you want your children to listen, try talking quietly to someone else.
Thanksgiving dinners take 18 hours to prepare. They are consumed in 12 minutes. Half-times take 12 minutes. This is not a coincidence.
BS PHONE STARTER:
What product or service should you definitely NOT cheap out on?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTIONS:
Question: A survey found the average person will $127 at Christmas on THIS. What?
Answer: Gifts for a person (or people) they don’t like
Question: According to a survey by Pepperidge Farm, of those who will cook the Thanksgiving meal, 50% will do THIS. What is it?
Answer: Actually enjoy it
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Opportunities are everywhere. So are excuses. Your life, your choice.