Monday, April 11, 2016        Edition: #5706

Bully For You!

★ Today Cyndi Lauper and Harvey Fierstein are to be honored with Hollywood Walk of Fame stars at a joint ceremony. Wayne Brady, who has just finished a triumphant run as ‘Lola’ in the pair’s “Kinky Boots on Broadway” show, and Sharon Osbourne will salute the honorees as they unveil the 2,577th and 2,578th stars. Tiffany Engen will also perform “History of Wrong Guys” from “Kinky Boots” at the ceremony outside the Pantages Theatre on LA’s Hollywood Blvd.
★ Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band canceled their Greensboro, North Carolina concert on Sunday because of the state’s new law blocking anti-discrimination rules for the LGBT community. The law requires transgender people to use bathrooms based on their biological sex at birth and bans state lawsuits for any type of workplace discrimination against LGBT people. Guitarist Steven Van Zandt calls that kind of legislation an “evil virus” spreading around the USA. Springsteen and the band considered, but ultimately rejected, other options before axing the show.
– Associated Press
★ And former “Top Gear” hosts Jeremy Clarkson, James May, and Richard Hammond still can’t come up with a name for their new Amazon Prime show. In a new promo video the trio are seen trying desperately to brainstorm a title so they can stop calling it “Currently Unnamed TV Show”. Tweeting a link to the promo Clarkson has written, ‘Naming a TV show shouldn’t be this hard TheStillVeryMuchUntitledClarksonHammondMayAmazonPrimeShowComingAutumn2016.’ For legal reasons, the new name cannot have the word ‘gear’ in it.

• “Dancing With the Stars” (ABC) – The couples dance to songs from Disney films; guest judge Zendaya.
• “Daily Show” (Comedy Central/CTV) – Jennifer Hudson (“JHUD”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – White Denim (“Stiff”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Escort (“Animal Nature”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/M3) – Sia (“This is Acting”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Action Bronson (“Mr Wonderful”); The Strokes’ drummer Fabrizio Moretti.
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Steve Martin/Edie Brickell (“So Familiar”). Rerun.
• “Live With Kelly & Michael” (syndicated/CTV) – “American Idol” winner Trent Harmon.
• “Nightly Show” (Comedy Central) – Waka Flocka Flame (“Flockaveli 2”).
• “The Real” (syndicated) – Eve (“Lip Lock”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Common (“Nobody’s Smiling”).
• “The Voice” (NBC/CTV2) – The remaining artists perform in hope of winning a spot on the live show.

• Coldplay – They’ve announced 12 more shows on their North American trek in support of “A Head Full of Dreams”. In addition to 10 stadium shows, they’ll play arenas in Indianapolis, St Louis, Louisville, Columbus, Buffalo, Detroit, Pittsburgh, Phoenix, Tulsa, Denver, Salt Lake City, and Las Vegas. The tour kicks off July 16th-17th at NYC’s MetLife Stadium.
• Iggy Pop – The veteran rocker has a white cockatoo called ‘Biggy Pop’.
• Jennifer Hudson – She’s ending her run in the Broadway revival of hit musical “The Color Purple”. The Oscar-winner made her debut on the Great White Way in December when she began her stint as singer ‘Shug Avery’; she will take her final bow on May 8th.
• Merle Haggard – A private funeral service was held Saturday in Palo Cedro CA for the late country music legend. He died Wednesday at age 79 after battling double pneumonia.
• Mötley Crüe – Singer Vince Neil has been cited for battery after he grabbed a woman by the hair when she sought an autograph from actor Nicolas Cage at a Las Vegas hotel on Friday. Cellphone video shows Cage then grabbing Neil around the neck while restraining him and shouting, “Stop this.”
• Rolling Stones – They’re apparently gearing up to release their 25th album sometime this year. Guitarist Ronnie Wood tells AP that the band has been in the studio recording new material as well as some blues covers of Howlin’ Wolf and Little Walter among others.
• Steve Miller – The new Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame inductee has scolded organizers for “lack of respect”. He says the hall charges inductees thousands-of-dollars to attend and alleges he only received 2 tickets for him and his wife. When he asked for more seats for his band’s families, he claims organizers asked for more money.
• A Thousand Horses – The video for their new single, “Southernality”, includes performances recorded throughout their current stint opening on Jason Aldean’s “We Were Here Tour”.

80% of water bottles purchased end up in landfills, and of those, some will take up to 1,000 years to decompose. But a product design student from the Iceland Academy of Arts is hoping to change that by using algae as an alternative to non-biodegradable plastic. The eco-friendly water bottle is made by mixing powdered agar, an algae product, with water to form a jelly-like substance. It’s then heated and poured into a bottle-shaped mold and allowed to set in ice-cold water. The final product is sturdy enough to carry liquid, but starts breaking down as soon as it’s empty. The only problem is the water can develop an unintended flavor if it sits in the bottle for too long, but even then it’s totally safe to drink. Some people may even prefer the algae-infused taste, and in that case the bottle itself is safe to nibble on. (Mmm, pond scum!)

A new study suggests that shopping therapy is real … but only if you buy the right things. Researchers from the UK’s University of Cambridge who have analyzed more than 75,000 spending transactions made by over 600 individuals have found that buyers whose purchases are in line with their personality type are more likely to feel happier overall. ‘Extroverts’, for example, seem happiest when purchasing entertainment and travel. ‘Conscientious’ buyers are happy when investing in health and fitness; and ‘agreeable’ people prove happiest when spending on pets and charities. It doesn’t seem to matter how much money is spent, as long as it’s spent on things that fit with each personality. (What do ‘jerks’ buy? BMWs?)

Home-sharing site Airbnb is setting up 2 lucky guests for a night in Kronborg Castle in Helsingør, Denmark … the alleged real-life inspiration for Elsinore palace in Shakespeare’s “Hamlet”. Fittingly, their stay will take place April 23rd, the 400th anniversary of Shakespeare’s death. The winners from an online contest will be invited to a lavish 7-course dinner in the castle’s main ballroom, with entertainment from Danish actors, singers, and the Royal Danish ballet. They’ll sleep in the King’s Tower, a turret that boasts fantastic views of the castle moat, the sea, and the Swedish coast in the distance. To enter, simply send a message to the Airbnb host by midnight April 13th explaining why you and a companion want to sleep in Kronborg Castle. The host will fly you in if you’re the lucky winner. The catch … there’s a $10 entry fee. (And you have to provide your own prop skull.)
– “Conde Nast Traveler”

Picnics, beach trips, and other outdoor activities would be a whole lot better with a glass of wine on hand. Unfortunately, there’s not a lot of table space in the woods, and nature’s terrain is a lot bumpier than your kitchen’s surfaces. Enter ‘Pointer’, a new wine glass that sticks into the ground. The helpful goblet is shaped like a traditional wine glass, but instead of a regular stem, it features a metal stake. The Dutch-designed glasses can be pushed into the dirt or sand to keep them upright, even on windy days; so you can skip the plastic cups on your next outing and have a truly classy picnic. (Until some totally trashed tippler trips and impales themselves.)

Mattel is bringing back classic Hot Wheels from the ’80s. Children of the 1980s now have kids of their own, and with parenthood comes the inevitable desire to share youthful experiences with the next generation. The new retro collection of Hot Wheels includes the ’87 Toyota Pickup, the Volkswagen SP2, the ’77 Plymouth Arrow, and more. Mattel has also announced the release of the 4-Lane Elimination Race Track, the Sto & Go Playset, the Dash and Crash S Track Set, and the essential Car-Go Race Hauler, a truck that’s designed to hold and transport up to 23 additional Hot Wheels cars. It’s OK if you don’t have kids; no one will judge you for snatching up these throwbacks for your personal collection. (They just won’t date you.)
– “Popular Mechanics”

Handwritten letters might help prevent suicide attempts, new research has found. A pilot study of a suicide prevention method called the ‘Attempted Suicide Short Intervention Program’ is being conducted at a hospital in Switzerland. As part of the method, patients received follow-up letters from therapists they’ve seen while receiving treatment in hospital. While the notes mostly contain boiler-plate advice on warning signs and staying safe, they also include a few personalized statements from the therapists. The personalized letters seem to give patients a reminder that someone cares about them. The proof is in the numbers … the letter-receiving group has proven 8 times less likely to attempt suicide over the 24 months of the study. (Shocking fact: 800,000 people around-the-world kill themselves every year.)
– “Washington Post”

Tokyo, Japan already has a “My Little Pony” restaurant; now a “Sailor Moon” eatery filled with imagery from the 1990s anime TV show is opening this Saturday. The Chibiusa Café (named after the character of the same name) is located near a related “Sailor Moon” art exhibition. Inside, fans can find themed food that includes pink hamburger buns, star-shaped tater tots, and a ‘Luna’-shaped berry mousse dessert. There’s also a dish called Tuxedo Mask’s Nihilistic Pasta, which comes with the hero’s signature mask and rose petals. On top of delicious-looking food, the restaurant is serving up Sailor Senshi Beauty Juice drinks, which come in 5 different colors to represent the team of heroines. (OK, who can still sing the theme song? “Fighting evil by moonlight, winning love by daylight …”)
– @FashionPressNet

• Superhero movies currently perform better at the box office if they aren’t just about superheroes.
• ‘Tyrion’ is mathematically the most important character in “Game of Thrones”.
– “Daily Telegraph”


1979 [37] Chris Gaylor, Stillwater OK, rock drummer (All-American Rejects-“Gives You Hell”, “Dirty Little Secret”)

1987 [29] Joss Stone (Joscelyn Stoker), Dover UK, pop-soul singer (“You Had Me”, “Fell In Love With a Boy”)/TV actress (“The Tudors” 2009-10)

• “Barbershop Quartet Day”, commemorating 1938 date when the Society for the Preservation and Encouragement of Barbershop Quartet Singing in America was founded.

• “Pet Day 2016”, sponsored by the Animal Miracle Network as a reason to ‘paws’ and consider the plight of the many animals in shelters awaiting a home.

• “World Parkinson’s Disease Day”, to boost awareness of the disorder and to spur new research and treatment innovations. The red tulip is the official flower of “World PD Day”.

2013 [03] Influential comedian/actor Jonathan Winters (inspiration to Billy Crystal, Jim Carrey, Jimmy Kimmel, Robin Williams, and Steve Martin) dies at age 87 in Montecito CA

2002 [14] Aretha Franklin and several Motown recording stars are honored with street names in Detroit MI’s new low-income housing project (“You can’t miss it, it’s at the corner of Aretha and Smokey …”)

2014 [02] Nirvana is inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, alongside KISS, and Beatles’ manager Brian Epstein

2004 [12] After 11 years as a pro, golfer Phil Mickelson wins his 1st major championship, The Masters

1964 [52] The Beatles set a new record as 14 of their singles are listed at the same time on the ‘Billboard Hot 100’ chart (from “Can’t Buy Me Love” at #1 to “Love Me Do” at #81)

[Tues] Grilled Cheese Sandwich Day
[Tues] Be Kind to Lawyers Day
[Tues] Library Workers Day
[Tues] Licorice Day
[Wed] Scrabble Day

Animal Control Appreciation Week / Dark Sky Week / Health Information Privacy & Security Week / Library Week / 9-1-1 Operators Week / Pan American Week / Spring Astronomy Week / Student Employment Week / Tattoo Week / Undergraduate Research Week / Volunteer Week / Week Of the Young Child / YoYo & Skill Toys Week


Highlight bits culled from 23 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
• His guide dog isn’t much of a skater.
• Says he wants to drink from ‘Stanky’s Cup’.
• He’s from Cuba.
• Won’t throw a check for fear of breaking his beer bottle.
• Whenever opponents challenge him to “drop ’em”, he takes down his pants.
• He has all his teeth.
– First published in “BS” 2001

✗ The bride trying to introduce people to each other while forgetting all their names.
✗ Some 2nd cousin-once-removed inviting herself. And her 3 kids. And their dog.
✗ Someone accidentally referring to the groom by the bride’s ex-boyfriend’s name.
✗ An older aunt pounding back frozen margaritas after asking, “Is it noon yet?”
✗ Any discussion of honeymoon sex.
✗ Someone asking the bride how much weight she’s planning to lose before the wedding.
✗ A half-dozen guests all getting the bride-to-be the same gift … cheapest thing on the registry.
✗ A gift of sexy lingerie from an inappropriate relative who thinks she’s at a bachelorette party.
✗ The bride getting all the ‘How Well Do You Know Each Other?’ questions wrong.
✗ The mother-of-the-bride blurting that she hopes the bride pops out some grandkids ASAP.
✗ The gift of the ‘Better Marriage’ fart-absorbing blanket.
✗ You are the bride and they make you wear that frickin’ ribbon hat.
– First published in “BS” 2014
Latest survey shows that 3-out-of-4 people make up 75% of the world’s population.

☎ Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous?

Question: According to a recent study, 20% of people who sing out loud today will do THIS.
Answer: Sing a commercial jingle.

You can never cross the ocean until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.

David Vincent Podcast, Tucson AZ; Leah Hanson @ AM800 [CKLW] Windsor ON; Jason Galbraith @ Three Is Comedy Podcast, Lancaster CA; Hayley Hammond @ More Radio, Sussex UK; Willie Edwards @ Majic 99.9 [WLXN] Lexington NC; and Dave Beany @ Westmoreland’s News Talk 1480 [WCNS] Latrobe PA.

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