April 3, 2014

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Thursday, April 3, 2014        Edition: #5194

Our Sheet Don’t Stink!

★ In a upcoming Discovery channel reality show, 8  people are stranded in the wilderness for 42 days with only the clothes on their backs. But here’s the twist … it’s a live television event. Two episodes of “Survival Live” (working title) air weekly, one pre-recorded and one live. Viewers can track the survivalists’ progress via a 24/7 web platform that details their biometric data. And the onus is on each survivalist to build a social network to help them through the ordeal by getting them things such as food, clothing, or a phone call from a loved one.
– HollywoodReporter.com
★ “Alpha House”, a political comedy-drama on Amazon’s content-streaming Instant Video service is getting a 2nd season due to an overwhelming response from viewers. The series, which stars star John Goodman, along with Mark Consuelos, Clark Johnson, and Matt Malloy, has garnered thousands of 5-star reviews from users. The show is written and produced by Garry Trudeau, best known for the long-running “Doonesbury” comic strip.
– ContactMusic.com
★ And Brooklyn Beckham, 15-year-old son of David & Victoria Beckham, is following in daddy’s footsteps by making his modeling debut in the tony magazine “Man About Town”, a glossy publication targeted at ‘high-end business-engaged and culturally-orientated male urbanities’. Brooklyn appears on the cover, accompanied by the word ‘Quiche’, a reference to Chris Lilley’s Australian sitcom “Ja’Mie” in which the word means ‘a step above hot’.
– Telegraph.co.uk

• “American Idol” (FOX/CTV) – Daughtry performs; 1 contestant is voted off.
• “Arsenio Hall” (syndicated) – TI (“Trouble Man: Heavy Is the Head”).
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Lyle Lovett (“Joshua Judges Ruth”).
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Luke Bryan (“Spring Break 6 … Like We Ain’t Ever”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Schoolboy Q (“Habits & Contradictions”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Deap Vally (“Sistrionix”).
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – Roddy Hart & The Lonesome Fire (“Roddy Hart & The Lonesome Fire”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/Omni1) – Joseph Arthur (“Ballad of Boogie Christ”).
• “The Talk” (CBS) – Blake Shelton (“Based On a True Story …”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Travie McCoy (“Lazarus”).

• Amy Winehouse – Plans by a company called FilmOn to stage a world tour with the late singer appearing via hologram technology have been shelved after her father, Mitch Winehouse, deemed the proposal ‘utter rubbish’. (Amy touring as a hologram? He said “No no no.”)
• Guns ‘N Roses –  Tommy Stinson has now confirmed that Duff McKagan will rejoin the band as his replacement for upcoming shows in South America. McKagan hinted at a reunion with singer Axl Rose in a tweet on Monday, but many thought it was just an April Fools joke.
• Kanye West – He’s postponed his upcoming Australian tour so he can focus on completing his next studio album. The 7-date trek scheduled to begin in Perth on May 2nd has now been pushed back until September 5th.
• Miley Cyrus – Her infamous ‘twerking’ tops a new listing of the best all-time dance moves by recording artists, according to a new UK poll. Also near the top: Madonna’s “Vogue”-ing; Michael Jackson’s ‘Moonwalk’; and Psy’s “Gangnam Style” horse-riding dance.
• Nirvana – Courtney Love says she’s in the early stages of turning her late husband Kurt Cobain’s life story into a Broadway musical. She tells “NME” she and daughter Frances Bean Cobain have agreed to the project if they can ‘get the right people involved’.
• Red Hot Chili Peppers – Bassist and founding member Flea is set to write a memoir. No publication date has been set for the as-yet-untitled book, but a press release says it will cover his ‘young, rebellious life on the streets of LA, where he befriended Anthony Kiedis’.
• Rolling Stones – They’ll return to the stage in Norway on May 26th, their first gig since the sudden death of Mick Jagger’s partner, L’Wren Scott. 13 more shows across Europe will follow. The Stones last played together in Singapore on March 15th.
• Spice Girls –Buzz has it they could be offered a multi-million-dollar Las Vegas residency at Planet Hollywood in 2016, the 20th anniversary of their first mega-hit, “Wannabe”. Fashion maven Victoria Beckham is said to have given her blessing to let them do a deal without her.

“Captain America: The Winter Soldier” ( PG-13 Action Adventure ): Chris Evans returns as ‘Steve Rogers/Captain America’, who struggles to embrace his role in the modern world and battles a new threat from an old foe … the Soviet agent known as ‘Winter Soldier’ (Sebastian Stan). Co-stars Samuel L Jackson, Scarlett Johansson, Robert Redford. The flick has already experienced an impressive $75-million opening weekend overseas.
NET: http://marvel.com/captainamerica

A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “I Am Chippendales” – Ben Stiller is in talks to join the cast of this film from producer/director Alan Ball about the founding of the famous male exotic dance troupe. Stiller would play ‘Nick DeNoia’, a former choreographer who helped come up with the idea for the Chippendales troupe and played a part in taking the raunchy act global.
• Michael Glatze bio-pic – 35-year-old James Franco will play the co-founder of “Young Gay America” magazine, who made headlines after he renounced his homosexuality and turned to religion following a health scare. The low budget film is being produced by Gus Van Sant and is set to start shooting in NYC this July.
• “Rock the Kasbah”– “Hawaii Five-0” star Scott Caan looks to replace Shia LaBeouf in Barry Levinson’s all-star comedy after the troubled actor pulled out of the project. Bruce Willis, Kate Hudson, Zooey Deschanel, and Danny McBride all co-star in the tale of the musical misadventures of a has-been rock band manager (Bill Murray) in Afghanistan.
• “Trainwreck” – 28-year-old Oscar-nominee Barkhad Abdi is reportedly in talks to star in his first major film since he confronted Tom Hanks as a Somali pirate in “Captain Phillips” (2013). He would join a cast that already includes Amy Schumer, Bill Hader, and Brie Larson in this Judd Apatow comedy scheduled to hit cinemas in July 2015.

✓ When you kiss someone for the first time, you get a spike in the neurotransmitter dopamine, making you crave more. It can also make you lose sleep as well as your appetite.
✓ When you kiss someone your heart beats faster, more oxygen reaches your brain, and your pupils dilate.
✓ Endorphins released during kissing bring on waves of euphoria; kissing also triggers the release of oxytocin in your body, often called the ‘love hormone’. Over time, kissing lowers your levels of stress hormone cortisol, making you feel safe and secure.
✓ When your lips touch someone else’s, 5-out-of-12 cranial nerves are engaged.
✓ The muscle you use to pucker your lips is called the ‘orbicularis oris’.
✓ The world record for the longest kiss stands at well over 2 days.
✓ Two-thirds of people tilt their head to the right when they kiss.
✓ Most people remember their first kiss more vividly than the first time they had sex.
– Heyfeed.com

Relationship in need of some passion? Try a double date. Why? Getting acquainted with a new couple spurs passionate feelings about your own partner, according to new research at Wayne State University in Detroit MI. Earlier studies have shown that sharing time with other couples increases positive mood; this new research adds the element of passion to the mix. What’s important for relationships during a double date is the opportunity to engage in deep conversation. When you open up as a couple to another couple, it validates your feelings of passionate love toward your own partner, researchers say. (Unless the other guy is hotter than you.)
– USAToday.com

A few oddities that are currently verboten or have been in the past …
✗ Bangladesh – Plastic Bags: When it outlawed them for environmental reasons in 2002, it started a trend, with France, Tanzania, and Mexico soon following.
✗ Canada – Baby Walkers: Banned in 2004 after studies showed babies have delayed motor development when raised with walkers. Canadian babies learn to walk the old fashioned way.
✗ China – Game Consoles: Enacted in 2000 to prevent the young from ‘wasting their time and not working’.
✗ Denmark – Fortified Foods: There is a fear in some circles of consuming too many vitamins. Unfortunately, this has led to blocking sale of popular products like Ovaltine and Rice Crispies.
✗ Malaysia – Yellow Clothing: From T-shirts and wrist bands to hats and shoelaces, it became illegal to wear yellow in 2011 as it’s the theme color of a group of opposition activists.
✗ Philippines – Claire Danes: After she refereed to the capital Manila as ‘ghastly, weird, and smelling of cockroaches’, both she and all her films have been denied any further appearances.
✗ Russia – Emo Fashion: The government has dubbed the style a ‘threat to national stability’ and banned emo clothing in an attempt to bring down the high suicide rate among teens.
✗ Saudi Arabia – Valentines Day: The ban includes restrictions on anything and everything red being sold on February 14th. It has led, however, to a thriving black market.
✗ Sweden – Spanking: Forget banning school spanking; in Sweden, not even parents can spank their kids. Physical discipline is against the law.
✗ USA – Haggis: Traditional Scottish haggis is made with sheep’s lung, which has been an illegal food product in the United States for 40 years.
– List25.com

More than 30% of bank clients don’t go into branches anymore.
– Consumerist.com


1958 [56] Alec Baldwin, Massapequa NY, TV actor (“30 Rock” 2006-13)/movie actor (“Rock of Ages”, “The Departed”)

1961 [53] Eddie Murphy, Brooklyn NY, movie actor (“Dreamgirls”, “Shrek”)/former TV comedian (“Saturday Night Live” 1980-84)

1982 [32] Cobie (Jacoba) Smulders, Vancouver BC, TV actress (“How I Met Your Mother” 2005-14)/movie actress (“The Avengers”)

1985 [29] Leona Lewis, London UK, pop singer (“Run”, “Bleeding Love”)/“X Factor UK” winner (2006)

1986 [28] Amanda Bynes, Thousand Oaks CA, sometime movie actress (“Hairspray”, “Easy A”)/recently rehabbed social media pariah

• “Armenian Appreciation Day”, honoring the small country bordering the Black Sea which most recently re-gained its independence in 1991. It’s history of invasion and genocide led to a diaspora in which Armenians fled and settled around-the-world. ‘Armenian Hall of Fame’ here …
NET: http://tinyurl.com/ytrtsd

• “Chocolate Mousse Day”. Once exclusive to French restaurants, mousse became popular in North America in the 1960s.
NET: http://bit.ly/gzGi7o

• “Don’t Go to Work Unless It’s Fun Day”, an annual observance encouraging us to lighten up at the office and actually enjoy work, not just endure it. (Party in the conference room!)

• “Find a Rainbow Day”, celebrating the gift from Mother Nature that enthrals us all with magical colors that rise up from the ground and arch through the sky.
NET: http://rgraf.hubpages.com/hub/National-Find-a-Rainbow-Day

• “World Party Day” (‘P-Day’), celebrated on April 3rd since 1996 as ‘a synchronized global mass celebration of a better world and the active creation of desirable reality’. (Any excuse.)
NET: http://www.punchbowl.com/holidays/world-party-day

2009 [05] “Fast & Furious”, the 4th film in the franchise, has a record-breaking $72.5 million opening weekend (all-time highest-grossing opening of any car-themed film)

1998 [16] Michael Jackson and someone become the proud parents of MJ’s 2nd child, daughter Paris-Michael Katherine Jackson

2008 [06] Mariah Carey’s “Touch My Body” goes to #1, beating Elvis Presley’s old record of 17 chart-topping singles (only The Beatles have more with 20)

1973 [41] Motorola engineer Martin Cooper (inventor of the portable cellphone) places the 1st-ever cellular phone call to his biggest rival, the head of research at Bell Laboratories (Quote: “Neener, neener, neener!”)

2003 [11] An Oklahoma couple (aged 95 & 94) finally gets married after 77 years of living together (“Gummy, I’ve decided I wanna make you an honest woman …”)

[Fri] “Island of Lemurs: Madagascar” opens in movie theaters
[Fri] NCAA March Madness Festival begins (Dallas TX)
[Fri] World Rat Day
[Sat] International Pillow Fight Day
[Sat] Deep Dish Pizza Day
[Sun] “Games of Thrones” season debut (HBO)
[Sun] “Academy of Country Music Awards” (CBS)
This Week Is … Library Week
This Month Is … Anxiety Month


A sampling of actual excuse notes from parents to teachers …
• “Please excuse Megan for being absent. She was sick, and I had her shot.”
• “I hope you will excuse Brandon for being absent on March 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.”
• “Please excuse Joshua for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea, and his boots leak.”
• “Ryan didn’t go to school yesterday because he had two teeth taken out of his face.”
• “Please excuse Zachary for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.”
• “Amanda was absent yesterday because she had a fever and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, and her brother had a fever. I wasn’t too well either.”
• “Please excuse Kayla for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.”
• “Ashley missed school yesterday for a good reason. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.”
• “… there must be something going around. Her father even got hot last night.”

☎ If you could star in a TV show that’s already been made, which would you pick?

Russian novelist Vladimir Nabokov (“Lolita”) is credited with inventing which?
a. ‘Capri’ pants.
b. The ‘Black Russian’ cocktail.
c. The ‘smiley’. [CORRECT]
– BuzzFeed.com

Every mother hopes that her daughter will marry a better man than she did, and is convinced her son will never find a wife as good as his father.

Question: A lot of things we use once and then throw away; but most of us throw THESE away without ever using them at all.
Answer: Instructions.

At the end of the day, life should ask you: “Do you want to save any of the changes?”

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