Tuesday, February 17, 2015        Edition: #5399

Sweet Sheet!

★ Alice Cooper will hit the stage with guitarist pals Joe Perry (Aerosmith) and actor Johnny Depp at this year’s “Rock In Rio” festival in Brazil. The veteran rocker will reunite his Hollywood Vampires supergroup for a set on the beach in September. They’ll perform on the same evening as Queens Of the Stone Age and System Of a Down at the annual event. This year’s edition of “Rock in Rio” runs from September 18th to 27th.
– BangShowbiz.com
★ “Game Of Thrones” star Lena Headey (‘Cersei Lannister’) has announced that she has another child on the way, but has not identified who the father is. The 42-year-old is already mother to a 5-year-old son named Wylie, whose father is her former husband, musician Peter Loughran. Rumors have been circulating about a possible romance with her “Game Of Thrones” co-star Pedro Pascal (‘Oberyn Martell’), with whom she’s been spotted hanging out.
– People.com
★ World famous tenor Placido Domingo is set to star in a revival of Woody Allen’s 1st opera, “Puccini’s Gianni Schicchi”, at the Los Angeles Opera this September. Filmmaker Allen, who will be 80 on December 1st, first staged the production at the LA Opera in 2008, adapting Puccini’s work based on a side character in “Dante’s Inferno” and transplanting the story to the modern era with references to Italian cinema and a fast-paced style reminiscent of his films.
– Telegraph.co.uk
★ And veteran actor Samuel L Jackson says he intentionally copied former world boxing champ Mike Tyson’s lisp for his role as the villain ‘Valentine’ in the new action movie “Kingsman: The Secret Service” because he wanted the character to be scary. The movie, which also stars Colin Firth and Michael Caine, opened on the weekend. Jackson quote: “I told (director) Matthew (Vaughn), ‘One of the baddest men on the planet has a lisp … Mike Tyson!”
– WENN.com

• “Countdown To the Oscars: 15 Movies That Changed American Cinema” (ABC) – A 1-hour special setting up this year’s Academy Awards, coming February 22nd.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Big Sean (“Dark Sky Paradise”, due February 24th).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Dreaming Bull (“DB EP”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/Omni1) – Twin Shadow (“Eclipse”, out March 17th).
• “MasterChef” (FOX) – The final four prepare 20 creme brulées; 2 chefs advance to the finalé.
• “Meredith Vieira Show” (syndicated) – Flo Rida (“The Perfect 10”).
• “The Real” (syndicated) – Aloe Blacc (“Lift Your Spirit”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Imagine Dragons (“Smoke + Mirrors”, out today); Taylor Swift (“1989”).
• “Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show” (USA Network/Animal Planet Canada) – Live coverage of the final day of the 139th edition of one the most prestigious canine competitions, from NYC’s Madison Square Garden.

• Coldplay – Chris Martin has signed on to curate the “Global Citizen Festival” … for the next 15 years. His duties officially kick off in September on the Great Lawn of NYC’s Central Park when he stages a massive star-studded event to raise awareness about global hunger and poverty.
• Imagine Dragons – Today they release the new album “Smoke + Mirrors”. The supporting tour hits 39 North American cities in June, July, and August. Metric and Halsey are opening acts.
• Sam Smith – The Grammy-winner has regained top spot on this week’s Official Albums Chart in Britain. “In the Lonely Hour” was released in May 2014 and has yet to drop outside the UK top 10. This is the 6th non-consecutive week that it’s been at #1.
• Taylor Swift – She’s agreed to be maid of honor at the upcoming wedding of her best friend, Britany Maack, whom she’s known since childhood. Typically for these days, they made the agreement in public via Twitter.

Out today on DVD, Netflix, Google Play and/or other video providers …
• “Birdman” ( R-Rated Dramedy ): Michael Keaton stars as a washed-up actor who once played an iconic superhero (typecasting?), attempting to recover his family, his career, and himself in the days leading up to the opening of a Broadway play. Co-stars Zach Galifianakis, Edward Norton, Emma Stone. Nominated for 9 Academy Awards.
• “Dumb & Dumber To” ( PG-13 Comedy ): Jim Carrey & Jeff Daniels return for this 2nd sequel to the Farrelly brothers’ 1994 film “Dumb & Dumber” (none of them were involved in 2003 s “Dumb & Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd”). 20 years since their first adventure, ‘Harry’ finds out he has a daughter who was adopted, and ‘Lloyd’ and ‘Harry’ set out to find her.
• “St Vincent” ( PG-13 Dramedy ): A young boy (Jaeden Lieberher) whose parents have just divorced finds an unlikely babysitter and mentor in the misanthropic, bawdy, hedonistic war veteran who lives next door, played by Bill Murray. An odd friendship soon blossoms between the improbable pair. Co-stars Melissa McCarthy, Naomi Watts, Terrence Howard.
• “The Theory of Everything” ( PG-13 Bio-Drama ): Eddie Redmayne & Felicity Jones star in this biofilm about celebrated physicist Stephen Hawking that’s inspired by his wife Jane Hawking’s memoir, “Travelling to Infinity: My Life With Stephen”. It details the relationship between the Cambridge University cosmology student and the arts student he fell in love with in the 1960s.
• Also released today: “Game of Thrones: The Complete 4th Season” (TV); “The Interview Freedom Edition” (Comedy); “Life Itself” (Documentary); “Scooby-Doo! Moon Monster Madness” (Animation); “The Sixties” (Documentary); and “Wahlburgers: The Complete 2nd Season” (Reality TV).

Think your job’s tough? A few actual occupational hazards from today and throughout history …
• Baker’s Knee – Causes the legs to bend inward toward each other, like the letter ‘K’.
• Chimneysweep’s Scrotum – A cancerous irritation caused by carcinogens, aka ‘soot-wart’.
• Clergy’s Knee – A particular form of bursitis that can be the result of too much kneeling.
• Fiddler’s Neck – Playing too much violin can cause a localized inflammation under the chin.
• Hatter’s Shakes – Caused by mercuric nitrate used in the production of 19th century felt.
• Painter’s Colic – A result of chronic constipation caused by the lead formerly used in paint.
• Student’s Elbow – An inflammation due to pressure to the arm from leaning on a desk.
• Tailor’s Bunion – Caused by working with fabric while sitting cross-legged on the floor.
• Trombonist’s Lung – From inhaling bacteria-riddled vapor from inside a brass instrument.
• Weaver’s Bottom – Sitting on hard wooden chairs all day can cause ischial bursitis in the hip.
– Adapted from MentalFloss.com

A BS compendium of recent ‘discoveries’ …
• Scientists say … that people in love are able to see the best in their partners and gloss over the somewhat negative qualities, which can actually lead to more satisfying relationships. (Similar to ‘Beer Goggles’, only longer-lasting.)
• Scientists say … the symptoms of ‘Broken Heart Syndrome’ mimic heart attacks, with chest pain and shortness of breath. (The good news is it’s temporary.)
• Scientists say …  those who eat a high-protein diet have a 40% lower risk of developing high blood pressure. That’s right, Boston University researchers have found that people who eat lots of protein actually lower their risk. (A good excuse to eat steak tonight!)
• Scientists say … sex with a younger woman may take more energy than some men have. A recent study shows that the risk of heart attack is far greater for men during extra-marital affairs. (Why isn’t there a song about this?)

Some things are done better at specific times, such as …
• Flu Shot – Early Fall. Flu season typically runs from October through March, so the best time to get the jab is September or October. The vaccination takes 2 weeks to become effective.
• Root Canal – Best time of day is 1-to-3 pm. According to European studies, local anesthesia lasts 3 times longer when given in early afternoon than when given in morning or evening.
• Skin Check – Best in Winter when skin tends to be fairest, making it easier for your dermatologist to catch unusual moles or other changes that could indicate skin cancer.
• Surgery – In the morning, when there tend to be fewer complications. ‘Adverse surgery events’ are more common between 3-and-4 pm and least common from 9 am to noon.
– Condensed from “Redbook”

• YouTube star Grumpy Cat earned more than Gwyneth Paltrow in 2014.
– “Daily Telegraph”
• People on dating sites who divide opinion with some rating them very beautiful and others rating them very ugly are far more successful than those everyone agrees are quite attractive.
– BBC News
• The popping sound popcorn makes as it is heated is due to rapidly escaping pressurized water vapor, not the kernels cracking open or ricocheting inside the pan.
– “The Guardian”


1965 [50] Michael Bay, LA CA, film director (“Transformers” films, “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” movies)

1972 [43] Taylor Hawkins, Fort Worth TX, rock drummer (Foo Fighters since 1997-“No Way Back”, “Times Like These”)

1972 [43] Billie Joe Armstrong, Oakland CA, rock singer-guitarist (Green Day-“American Idiot”, “Boulevard Of Broken Dreams”)

1981 [34] Joseph Gordon-Levitt, LA CA, movie actor-director-producer (“Lincoln”, “The Dark Knight Rises”)/former TV actor (“3rd Rock From the Sun” 1996–2001)

1981 [34] Paris Hilton, NYC, socialite/sometime TV personality (“Paris Hilton’s My New BFF”)/movie actress (“House of Wax”)/great-granddaughter of hotel magnate Conrad Hilton

1991 [24] Ed Sheeran, Halifax UK, pop singer-songwriter-guitarist-producer (“Thinking Out Loud”, “The A Team”)

1996 [19] Sasha Pieterse, Johannesburg, South Africa, TV actress (‘Alison DiLaurentis’ on “Pretty Little Liars” since 2010)

• “Mardi Gras”/”Fat Tuesday”/”Shrove Tuesday”/”Pancake Day”/”Carnaval”, always 46 days before Easter and traditionally the final chance to indulge before the austerity of Lent. In Latin, ‘carne vale’ means ‘farewell to meat’. The day is marked by masked balls, lavish costumes, floats, parades, torchlight processions, dancing, fireworks, and feasting on all sorts of foods. Some of the biggest celebrations are in New Orleans, Louisiana; Rio de Janeiro, Brazil; and Nice, France. Many of the traditions date to the 14th century.

• “Olney Pancake Race”, when the women of Olney, England run a 415-yard course while carrying a pan of pancakes. The tradition goes back more than 500 years.
NET: http://olneypancakerace.org
For the past 65 years, a mirror event has been staged in Liberal, Kansas in which the town women compete against those in Olney UK for best time in the “International Pancake Race”.
NET: http://www.pancakeday.net

• “PTA Founders’ Day”, commemorating the parent-teacher association’s 1897 founding. It was originally known as the ‘National Congress of Mothers’.

• “World Human Spirit Day”, encouraging 2 minutes of silent meditation throughout the world – and ‘beyond’ – to focus on the true spirit that flows through everything. Wow, groovy.

2010 [05] Susan Jacks, singer of “Which Way You Goin’ Billy?” with The Poppy Family (1970), has a kidney donated to her from brother Billy, the inspiration for the #1 hit song

2003 [12] Reality TV reaches a new low as some 40 million viewers watch fake “Joe Millionaire” (in reality, 28-year old heavy equipment operator Evan Marriott) select a potential bride from 20 ‘contestants’ (model Zora Andrich) on FOX-TV

2013 [02] Danica Patrick becomes the 1st female driver in NASCAR history to win the pole position at the Daytona 500 auto race

2003 [12] Tauranga NZ man is sentenced to 200 hours of community service for speeding … without a license or registration … on a motorized barstool … semi-naked … while intoxicated … with his butt on fire

[Wed] Ash Wednesday
[Wed] NME Awards (London)
[Wed] Drink Wine Day
[Thurs] Chinese New Year
[Thurs] “‘Two-And-a-Half Men” series finalé (CBS)
[Thurs] Chocolate Mint Day
This Week Is … Kraut & Frankfurter Week
This Month Is … Celebration of Chocolate Month


✗ “So … you must have been single for a long time.”
✗ “Wow! You look way better than you do in your photos.”
✗ “You remind me of my mom.”
✗ “My ex and I used to come to this place all the time. It was our favorite!”
✗ “I would never notice you in a club, to be honest.”
✗ “I am single because it’s really hard to find someone on my level.”
✗ “I wouldn’t mind getting married next year.”
✗ “Can you imagine how beautiful our children would be?”
✗ “Is your best friend single?”
✗ “My ex was so sexy. I don’t think I’ll ever find someone that hot.”
– Adapted from List25.com

I think I’ve got furniture disease. That’s when your chest falls into your drawers.

Where did these show biz stars work before they became famous?
• Sylvester Stallone (“The Expendables”) made a living as a …
a. Personal Trainer.
b. Car Wash Attendant.
c. Lion Cage Cleaner. [CORRECT]

• Hugh Jackman (“X-Men: Days of Future Past”) was once a …
a. Ballerino.
b. Cattle Herder.
c. Birthday Party Clown [CORRECT]

• Rachel McAdams (“True Detective”) briefly had a gig as a …
a. McDonald’s Cashier [CORRECT]
b. Professional Wrestler.
c. Stripper.

• Nicole Kidman (“Paddington”) once worked as a …
a. Furniture Upholsterer.
b. Kangaroo Wrangler.
c. Massage Therapist [CORRECT]
– HardlyFamous.com

☎ What now-defunct technology did you enthusiastically embrace?

Question: The average woman does THIS 19 times before she gets married.
Answer: Kisses 19 different men.

It’s OK to ask for help.

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