Friday, July 6, 2012                  Edition: #4781


Sheeters Always Prosper!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
A lawyer for Katie Holmes has denied reports she filed an emergency motion to set up a temporary child support agreement with soon-to-be-ex Tom Cruise, saying other than her divorce filing, the only pending application is her request the ongoing legal proceedings be kept out of the public domain (she’s winning the PR war by keeping her mouth shut) . . . Meanwhile,  former Scientologist Jenna Miscavige Hill (niece of church leader David Miscavige) says Katie Holmes has reason to fear what will happen to daughter Suri (what a great movie all this would make, if the truth could ever be uncovered) . . . 33-year-old actress Claire Danes, who won a Golden Globe for “Homeland” in January, is pregnant with her 1st child via actor-husband Hugh Dancy, but a spokesman says the pregnancy ‘will not impact’ on production of Season 2 of the Showtime series, set to premiere September 30th (somewhere a screenwriter is mumbling profanities while furiously scribbling) . . . “Wall Street Journal” reports that actor Alec Baldwin, who’s lately been venting anger at the media both verbally and physically, has donated the princely sum of $1 million to the New York Philharmonic (this is known as deflecting attention) . . . Meantime, little brother Billy Baldwin says Alec could run for NYC mayor, telling CNN’s Piers Morgan his brother’s political aspirations are ‘very real’ (love to watch those press conferences) . . . And the male stripper movie “Magic Mike” is set to become a Broadway musical, Channing Tatum telling “Daily Star” it was co-star Matt Bomer who came up with the idea (producer Reid Carolin says it will be a show where ‘women can scream at the dancers and throw money’).

WEEKEND SHOW BIZ SKED:

• “American Idols Live Tour ‘12” – Tonight the 45-date Summer trek by Season 11’s top 10 finalists (including winner Phillip Phillips & runner-up Jessica Sanchez) gets underway in Detroit, Michigan.
• Essence Music Festival (New Orleans LA) – The annual 4-day weekend music fest at the Superdome includes performances by Aretha Franklin, Chaka Khan, D’Angelo, Keyshia Cole, Mary J Blige, Trey Songz, and many more.
NET: http://www.essence.com/festivals/2012/essence-music-festival/
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Tonight Linkin Park (“Living Things”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Ting Tings (“Sounds From Nowheresville”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – Tonight Tenacious D (“Rize Of the Fenix”). Rerun.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC/Global) – Host Sofia Vergara (“Modern Family”); musical guest One Direction (“Up All Night”). Rerun.
• “Today” (NBC) – This morning Flo Rida (“Wild Ones”) performs live in NYC’s Rockefeller Plaza.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Tonight Chris Robinson Brotherhood (“Big Moon Ritual”). Rerun.
• Wireless Festival (London UK) – The 3-day annual festival in Hyde Park is headlined by Deadmau5 tonight, Drake on Saturday, and Rihanna Sunday. Also appearing: Jessie J, Metric, Niki Minaj, Pitbull, and more.
NET: http://www.wirelessfestival.co.uk

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Adele – For the first time since SoundScan began tracking music 21 years ago, the record industry only has 1 album selling a million units half-way through the year, Adele’s smash hit “21”. That may be because it’s hogged the lion’s share of sales, moving 3.69 million units.
• Barenaked Ladies – Tonight they headline the “Last Summer On Earth” tour as it begins in Toledo, Ohio. Also on the bill: Blues Traveler, Cracker, and Big Head Todd & The Monsters.
• Elton John – Sunday in Sopot, Poland he’ll be honored with a ‘Medal of Gratitude’ for his contributions to the anti-Communist movement in the 1980s. He played a concert in the country in 1984 and offered support to trade union leader Lech Walesa, who later became president.
• Kanye West – He has a new management consultant, Irving Azoff, who was recently named the most powerful man in the music industry. He also just happens to be godfather to Kanye’s girlfriend, Kim Kardashian.
• Motley Crue – Tommy Lee has Facebooked fans, asking them to respect his privacy by putting away their cameras when they spot him in public. He says he’s tired of being asked to pose for pics when off-duty, saying his only responsibility as a rock star is to entertain onstage.
• Radiohead – Their tune “Everything In Its Right Place” is the soundtrack of a new Greenpeace ‘Save the Arctic’ video that shows a polar bear sifting through city trash in a desperate search for food, smelling exhaust fumes from cars, and wandering the streets alone. The sad video ends as the bear dies under a tree in a city park.
• Roger Waters – Tonight performs Pink Floyd’s “The Wall” at NYC’s Yankee Stadium. “The Wall Tour” winds up July 14th in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENING:

“Savages” ( R-Rated Crime Thriller ): In the latest from director Oliver Stone, Aaron Johnson and Taylor Kitsch play pot-growers who face off against the Mexican drug cartel that kidnapped their shared girlfriend, played by Blake Lively. Co-stars Benicio Del Toro, John Travolta, Salma Hayek. Based on the bestseller by Don Wilson.
NET: http://www.savagesfilm.com

WHY YOU SHOULD READ TO YOUR BABY:

The 21st-century kid might have access to many technological innovations but doctors at UT Southwestern Medical Center in Dallas, Texas say reading to your baby is the only tried-and-true method to help the child speak and understand language. Dr Paul Bauer says that when parents come to him with a child who has delayed language skills, the first thing he asks is how much they read to the child. He contends that helping children understand language and develop speech is often simply a matter of taking time to read to them. (Apparently [sports guy] never had bedtime stories.)
– ANI Agency

BIZARRE BODY MODIFICATION:

Is the human body just a canvas waiting to be used? People who agree to the following procedures may think so …
• Body Piercing – One of the oldest forms of body modification, once done for religious reasons.
It is not surprising to find ear, nose, and even genital piercing in mummified tombs. It’s now considered an expression of individuality and/or revolt against the norm.
• Cranial Deformation – Dates back before written history, but is still going on today in isolated areas of Africa and South America. Why? It’s thought that the elongation of the skull can directly affect your intelligence and your sensitivity to the spirit world.
• Foot Binding – The tradition of binding the feet of Chinese women likely started in the 10th century and was only outlawed in 1949. While having a ‘lotus-shaped’ foot was a source of pride, it was extremely painful throughout the woman’s life.
• Neck Rings – The Long-Neck Karen is an entire tribe of people whose women wear up to 20 neck rings (brass, Slinky-shaped coils), to create the illusion that the neck is stretched. In reality the rings are pushing the chest, ribs, and collarbones down in an unnatural fashion.
• Scarification – Supposed body beautification through the creation of scars on the body. It’s been used widely throughout history to mark people for status, accomplishments, and even as punishment.
• Tooth Sharpening – Done historically in Bali to change negative emotions, which were thought to reside in the teeth. Now being done just because some teenage simpleton wants to look like a vampire.
– ListsOPlenty.com

DAILY DOSE OF BS IN ADS:

A study to note and debunk scientific claims that the average person hears on a daily basis has found – not surprisingly – that the majority of them come from advertisers. Among them …
• A breakfast cereal claiming it can ‘reduce your cholesterol’.
• A dairy product that claims its cows ‘graze freely on lush natural pastures’.
• Email spam that claims you can develop ‘huge breasts overnight’.
• Diet supplements that claim they make you feel ‘20 years younger’.
The bottom line: Few of the scientific facts we hear each day are completely true, and many are outright lies. (When they say ‘recommended by 4-out-of-5 dentists’, did they ask more than 5?)
– PopSci.com

DID YOU KNOW?

✓ 40 people are sent to hospital ERs for dog bites … every minute.
✓ The real reason an ostrich sticks its head in the sand is to look for water.
✓ Most of us have eaten a spider in our sleep.
– MindJunker.com

BS CHRONOMETER 07.06.12


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1921 [91] Nancy Reagan, NYC, former US First Lady/Mrs Ronald Reagan (1952-2004)

1946 [66] George Walker Bush (aka ‘Dubya’), New Haven CT, 43rd US President

1946 [66] Sylvester Stallone, NYC, movie actor/director (“Rocky I-VI”, “Rambo I-III”)  UP NEXT: “The Expendables 2”, opening August 17th.

1948 [64] Peter Mansbridge, London UK, TV journalist/anchor (“The National” since 1988)/wed to actress Cynthia Dale since 1998/wed to news anchor Wendy Mesley 1989-92

1951 [61] Geoffrey Rush, Toowoomba, Australia, movie actor (“Pirates Of the Caribbean” films, “The King’s Speech”)

1975 [37] 50 Cent (Curtis Jackson), Queens NY, rapper (“Candy Shop”, “In Da Club”)/wannabe actor (“Home Of the Brave”, “Get Rich or Die Tryin’”)  BS FACTOID: He’s celebrating by making his new album “5 (Murder by Numbers)” available for download free-of-charge today.

SATURDAY –
Rock drummer Ringo Starr (All-Starr Band, The Beatles) is 72; TV actress Jorja Fox (“CSI”) is 44; Movie actress Berenice Bejo (“The Artist”) is 36.

SUNDAY –
TV actor Jeffrey Tambor (“Arrested Development”) is 68; Movie actor Kevin Bacon (“Footloose”) is 54; Country singer Toby Keith (“Made in America”) is 51; Alt-rock singer Beck (“E-Pro”) is 42;
Rock guitarist David Kennedy (Angels & Airwaves) is 36; Movie actor Jaden Smith (“The Pursuit of Happyness”) is 14.

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .

• “Calgary Stampede”, the 100th annual rodeo & 10-day festival through July 15th in Calgary, Alberta is expected to attract 1.2 million visitors. This year’s performers include AWOLNATION, The Band Perry, Beach Boys, Brad Paisley, Carly Rae Jepsen, Garth Brooks, K’naan, The Sheepdogs, and many others.
NET: http://calgarystampede.com
• “Fiesta de San Fermin” in Pamplona, Spain, infamous for its annual ‘Running Of the Bulls’. The 9-day festival was made legendary by Ernest Hemingway in his novel “The Sun Also Rises”.
NET: http://spainforvisitors.com/sections/sanfermin.htm
• “Fried Chicken Day”. Don’t know who started it; don’t know why. But then … who cares? Dig in!
• “Great International Chicken Wing Society Cookoff”, the 11th annual 3-day competition in Reno, Nevada.
• “International Kissing Day”, so presumably you can only kiss someone from another country.
• “Take Your Webmaster to Lunch Day”, to show appreciation for the specialized geek responsible for your company’s website. (What a fascinating time this will be, huh?)
• “World Wife Carrying Championships”, the 17th annual in Sonkajarvi, Finland in which men from around-the-world tote their wives (or a female friend) around an 830-ft (250-m) obstacle course in hope of winning her weight in beer. The current record is 55.5 seconds.
NET: http://www.eukonkanto.fi/en/

SATURDAY –
• “Chocolate Day”, started by the National Confectioners Association to promote what is almost every woman’s (and many a man’s) weakness. Some say chocolate from the New World (mostly Mexico) was introduced to Europe on this date in 1550.
• “Collector Car Appreciation Day”, the 3rd annual salute to automotive hobbyists that’s geared to raising awareness of automotive restoration and collection.
• “Father-Daughter Take a Walk Together Day”. If she’s a teenager, good luck! Like are you tryin’ to embarrass her or what?
• “Global Forgiveness Day”, begun in 1994 as a way for us to identify with our personal need to forgive and be forgiven. A good day to knock that chip off your shoulder and make peace with yourself and others.
NET: http://www.ceca.cc/global_forgiveness_day/
• “International Cherry Pit Spitting Contest”, the 39th annual expectorates in Eau Claire, Michigan. Entrants eat a cherry and then spit the pit as far as possible. Sounds like a good excuse for an in-studio competition!
NET: http://www.treemendus-fruit.com/album1_009.htm
• “Tell the Truth Day”, challenging each of us to go an entire day without telling a lie or saying anything misleading or dishonest. Is this possible?

SUNDAY –
• “Eat a Vegetable You’ve Never Tried Before Day”. Bamboo? Kudzu?
• “Videogames Day”, a day for kids to appreciate both the games … and the parents who buy them. Actually, one of the fastest growing segments of the videogame market is now adult women.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .

1994 [18] “Forrest Gump”, starring Tom Hanks, opens in movie theaters (goes on to earn $678 million in worldwide box office)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .

1957 [55] Liverpool teenagers John Lennon and Paul McCartney 1st meet at the  Woolton Parish Church Garden Fête, at which John and his Quarry Men skiffle group are invited to play (The Beatles ensue)

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .

1933 [79] In the 1st Major League Baseball “All-Star Game”, the American League wins 4-2 as Babe Ruth connects for the 1st “All-Star” home run (Comiskey Park, Chicago IL)

2002 [10] Serena Williams beats older sister Venus Williams to win her 1st Wimbledon women’s title and her 2nd straight Grand Slam tennis tournament

TODAY’S RECORDS . . .

1928 [84] ‘World’s Largest Recorded Hailstone’, measuring 1.5 lbs and 17 inches in diameter, falls in Potter, Nebraska

1985 [27] Tommy ‘Muscrat’ Greene of Annapolis, Maryland sets a new world record by eating 288 oysters in 1 minute, 33 seconds

COMING UP . . .

[Mon] International Town Criers Day
[Tues] Don’t Step On A Bee Day
[Tues] Pina Colada Day
[Tues] Teddy Bears Picnic Day
[Wed] Slurpee Day
This Week Is … Character Counts Week
This Month Is … Baked Bean Month

BULL’S BITS


I THINK I’M GOING TO MOW THE LAWN THIS WEEKEND BECAUSE …
• The last time it was cut, the neighbor kid did it for $5. Today, his son wants $100.
• Even my sunglasses have grass stains.
• I have to attach an orange antenna flag to the kid before he plays outside.
• Our lawn flamingo has been taken down by hungry jackals.
• Taking out the garbage requires a machete and 4-days supply of water.
• Our above-ground pool is now an in-ground pool.
• Suddenly our yard is THE hot spot to watch bison do it.

BS PHONE STARTER:

☎ What do you keep telling yourself you’re going to do that you never seem to get around to doing? (Learning a 2nd language? Cleaning out the garage? Sorting your 42,000 photos? Going on vacation? Calling your mom?)

BS RANDOM JOKE:

A recent study has found that you’re much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:

Question: THIS makes you more likely to argue with your spouse on vacation.
Answer: Dieting.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:

Bad manners are like bad teeth. Nobody knows you have them if you keep your mouth shut.


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