Tuesday, June 27, 2006        Edition: #3314
More From the Sheethouse!

TONIGHT Damon Wayans hosts the 6th annual “BET Awards” in Los Angeles, with Jamie Foxx,  Mary J Blige, Missy Elliott & Busta Rhymes leading the field of nominees (Beyoncé Knowles opens the 3-hour show and Prince closes it down) . . . TONIGHT “Superman Returns” (starring Brandon Routh, Kate Bosworth & Kevin Spacey) debuts in select theaters with a 10 pm showing, before TOMORROW’s wide opening (it’s been 19 years since 1987’s “Superman IV: The Quest for Peace”) . . . Leonardo Di Caprio’s ex-girlfriend, model Gisele Bundchen, and her surfer boyfriend Kelly Slater have ended their relationship after 8 months (an eternity in Hollywood) . . . Jennifer Lopez denies that her constant companion, “King of Queens” star Leah Remini, is trying to convert her to Scientology, insisting they’re just friends (isn’t that what Katie Holmes once said?) . . . 41-year-old Canadian-born fashion model Linda Evangelista, one of 5 once dubbed ‘supermodels’, is pregnant with her first child, reportedly via an unnamed NYC architect (apparently he had designs on her) . . . And show biz blogger TMZ has recommended several new additions to its ‘Z-List’, once Hollywood heavyweights who are now ‘VIPs’ (‘Very Insignificant People’), including producer/director David Lynch, actress-turned-tree-climber Daryl Hannah, has-been singer/actress Courtney Love, former CBC-TV news anchor Dan Rather, and getting-sued-yet-again Michael Jackson.

• Beach Boys – TODAY a new CD single marking the 40th anniversary of “Good Vibrations” is being released, featuring several versions of the iconic tune. Later THIS SUMMER Capitol/EMI will release a 40th anniversary package of their entire “Pet Sounds” album.
• Bonnie Raitt – TONIGHT she guests on “Late Night With Conan O’Brien” (NBC).
• Diana Krall – Her new album is due in SEPTEMBER and her first child with husband Elvis Costello in DECEMBER, just in time for their 3rd wedding anniversary (DECEMBER 6th).
• Katharine McPhee – TODAY the “American Idol” runner-up releases her first singles, a remake of “Over the Rainbow” and the horrific original song the show foisted on her, “My Destiny”. Still no word on why she cancelled all appearances after admitting LAST WEEK that she battled an eating disorder.
• Stevie Nicks – The former Fleetwood Mac classic rocker is donating hundreds of iPods to soldiers wounded in Iraq. They’re pre-loaded with her music along with tunes by Aerosmith and Elvis Presley. She’s a regular visitor at the National Naval Medical Center in Bethesda MD.
• Sting – He’s purchased a 5,500-sq-ft penthouse overlooking NYC’s Central Park, in the same building as Denzel Washtington pad. But alas, an extensive reno job means it won’t be ready to move into until NEXT YEAR.
• Also on CD TODAY: Bjork’s “Surrounded: Dual Disk Brick”; Dashboard Confessional’s “Dusk & Summer”; Hank Williams Jr’s “That’s How They Do It in Dixie”; India.Arie’s “Testimony: Vol 1, Life & Relationship”; Julie Roberts’s “Men & Mascara”; and Pet Shop Boys’ “Fundamental”.

• “Annapolis” ( Drama ): James Franco & Tyrese Gibson star in this boxing tale set against the backdrop of the Annapolis Naval Academy. Basically, it’s “Rocky” meets “An Officer & a Gentleman”. Jordana Brewster & Donnie Wahlberg co-star.
• “Failure to Launch” ( Romantic Comedy ): Matthew McConaughey plays a commitment-shy 35-year-old bachelor who’s never found the need to move out of the nest, much to the frustration of his parents (Terry Bradshaw & Kathy Bates). Sarah Jessica Parker plays the ‘date bait’ tasked with luring him out of the house. Gee, guess what happens?
• “Find Me Guilty” ( Crime Comedy ): Vin Diesel plays a fun-loving, hard-partying, small-time mob lieutenant who represents himself in court. Based on the true story of Jack DiNorscio, a mobster who defended himself in court for what would be the longest Mafia trial in US history.
• “Hail! Hail! Rock ‘n Roll” ( Documentary): A look at what happened 20 years ago when a raft of rock stars (Keith Richards, Bruce Springsteen, Eric Clapton, Jerry Lee Lewis, Roy Orbison, etc) tried to help music legend Chuck Berry celebrate his 60th birthday. Directed by Taylor Hackford (“Ray”), it was originally released in movie theaters in 1987. The initial DVD/CD release is exclusive to Starbucks (remember when it was in the coffee biz?).
• “Imagine Me & You” ( Romantic Comedy ): Piper Perabo plays a radiant bride on her wedding day who falls in love – with another woman (Lena Headey) in this light-hearted Brit-com.
• “Madea’s Family Reunion” ( Dramedy ): Writer/actor/director Tyler Perry dons the muumuu once again to play the outspoken, larger-than-life family matriarch ‘Madea Simmons’, This time the pistol-packing grandma has to referee to a chaotic family reunion. A follow-up to the 2005 film “Diary of a Mad Black Woman”.
• “Ultraviolet” ( Sci-Fi Thriller ): Milla Jovovich plays a beautiful vampire in a futuristic world who must protect a boy whose blood may carry the cure for all the humans transformed into vampires by a plague. Shot entirely in China.
• Also on DVD TODAY: “Strangers with Candy: The Complete Series” (1999-2000); “Project Runway: The Complete 2nd Season”; and “Blue Collar Comedy Tour: One for the Road”.

THIS WEEK as the “Wimbledon Championships” get underway in the UK, tennis officials have outlawed skimpy outfits among female participants. Bad news for fans of former champ Maria Sharapova and her hottie Russian compatriots Elena Dementieva and Maria Kirilenko. What’s the prob? Those in charge think the strict new dress code will help redirect fan attention back to the game. (Balls to you, we say.)
– “The Sun”

A ranking of the devices that have most impacted civilization and helped shape the course of history …
10. Saw
9. Eyeglasses
8. Sword
7. Rifle
6. Scythe
5. Harness
4. Pencil
3. Compass
2. Abacus
1. Knife
(C’mon … how could you forget duct tape?)
– “Forbes”

A drink made from cannabis will soon be launched in health food stores, priced at circa $2.50 a can. ‘C-Ice Swiss Cannabis Ice Tea’ is being marketed as a health drink with the claim that it gives you a ‘fantastic natural feeling’. It does not give you a high, however, as the Swiss hemp used in it has had its narcotic properties removed. (So what you’ve really got here is a can of tea … that tastes like rope.)
– “GQ”

Roughly 1 in 7 gay men may owe his sexual orientation to the simple fact that he has older brothers, according to University of Toronto researchers. Studies have shown that each additional older brother increases the odds of homosexuality in a younger brother. The phenomenon has been dubbed the ‘Fraternal Birth Order Effect’. (So let’s talk about the Jackson family …)
– “Science Daily”

The priciest places in the world to live, as compiled annually by Mercer Human Resource Consulting …
5. London UK.
4. Hong Kong, China
3. Tokyo, Japan
2. Seoul, South Korea
1. Moscow, Russia
Most expensive Canadian cities that were included in the survey: Toronto (47), Vancouver (56), Calgary (7l), Montreal (80), and Ottawa (90). Obviously these people have never visited Fort McMurray AB.
At #10, NYC remains the most expensive city in North America. The most affordable city in the world? Asuncion, Paraguay. (Where you can buy a house for 2 snails and a bag of rocks.)
– “Globe & Mail”

Europe’s first detox clinic for video game addicts is set to open in Amsterdam, Holland. The director of Smith & Jones Addiction Consultants says games can become as addictive as gambling or drugs. The center has already treated 20 video-game addicts THIS YEAR, aged from 13-to-30. Some show withdrawal symptoms, such as shaking and sweating, when they just look at a computer. (Nervous, pale, sweaty guys … yep, sounds like game geeks.)
– AP

Italian researchers investigating the effects of cellphone emissions have found that the electromagnetic fields they generate produce an increase in excitability in the brain’s cortex. Experiments at a neurology research center in Brescia showed the effect was prominent after 45 minutes exposure to a cellphone, but was short-lasting as everything returned to normal within an hour. (Except the vehicle they ran into while gabbing on the phone.)
– ANI Health & Science

Lemurs and capuchin monkeys apparently get high on millipedes. It seems that millipedes release powerful chemicals as a defense when they’re threatened, chemicals which have the side-effect of getting monkeys stoned when they ingest them. Researchers think that’s why they pass the creepy, crawlies around like a joint. (“Hey ya big ape, don’t Bogart the ‘pede, man.”)
– “The Independent”

The latest in-flight amenity being offered to the wealthy folk who travel by private jet? Tattoos! Revolution Air has a deal with famed tattoo artist Mario Barth for clients who are interested in getting inked at 30,000 feet. Barth has illustrated the bods of such stars as Lenny Kravitz and Nikki Sixx. (“Oops, sorry about the 2 Os in ‘Bob’. Don’t you just hate turbulence?”)
– “NY Post”

The last “World Cup” final, between Brazil and Germany in 2002, was watched by a whopping 1.1 billion people.


1959 [47] Lorrie (Loretta Lynn) Morgan, Hendersonville TN, country singer (“Out of Your Shoes”)/estranged Mrs Sammy Kershaw (her 5th husband)

1975 [31] Tobey Maguire, Santa Monica CA, movie actor (“Spider-Man 1 & 2″, “Seabiscuit”)  COMING UP: “Spider-Man 3“ in MAY 2007.

1976 [30] Leigh Nash, New Braunfels TX, pop singer (Sixpence None the Richer-“Kiss Me”)

• “Canadian Multiculturalism Day”, an opportunity to celebrate our diversity and to appreciate the contributions of the various multicultural groups and communities to Canadian society.
NET: http://www.pch.gc.ca/special/canada/11/multi_e.cfm

• “Decide To Be Married Day”, focusing on the joys of the ball-and-chain. Ask listeners for advantages to being married that you rarely hear about.

• “National HIV Testing Day”, an annual campaign by the National Association of People with AIDS to encourage at-risk individuals to receive voluntary HIV counselling and testing.
NET: http://www.napwa.org/hivtestinfo/

• “Paul Bunyan Day”, celebrating the gigantic lumberjack of American folklore. According to the story, Bunyan and his blue ox ‘Babe’ travelled around country where he became known for his logging feats.

• “Sunglasses Day”, celebrated on the anniversary of the 1942 debut of ‘Ray-Ban Sunglasses’. Shades as we know them today are a 20th-century phenomenon. In the 1930s, the military commissioned glasses that would protect pilots from sun glare. But they didn’t become a real fad until the 1960s when an ad campaign asked, “Who’s Behind those Foster Grants?”.

1929 [77] 1st ‘Color TV’ demonstrated (it only takes 40 years to catch on)

1980 [26] “O Canada” unanimously accepted by House of Commons and Senate as Canada’s national anthem, with ‘special allowance for possible changes of words’ (written by Calixa Lavallee & Adolphe-Basile Routhier, it was officially proclaimed Canada’s national anthem a few days later on July 1, 1980)

1859 [147] The melody of the world’s most-sung song “Happy Birthday to You” is composed by Louisville KY school teacher Mildred J Hill (published in 1893 as “Good Morning To All” with lyrics written by her sister Patty Smith Hill).  According to statistics, the song is sung somewhere in the world every minute of every day.

1994 [12] 1st music release on the Internet (Aerosmith-“Head First”)

2000 [06] 1st ever ‘Underwater Leg’ of an Olympic torch relay, through Australia’s Great Barrier Reef on the way to Sydney

1949 [57] ‘Largest Canadian Majority Government’ in history as Louis St Laurent’s Liberals win 191 seats to 41 for Conservatives, 13 for CCF and 10 for Social Credit

[1 week today] 4th of July (US Independence Day)
[Wed] Handshake Day
[Wed] Columnists Day
[Thurs] Camera Day
[Thurs-July 9] Montréal Jazz Festival
[Sat] Canada Day
[Sat] World Wife Carrying Championships (Sonkajarvi, Finland)
This Week Is … Assistant Principals Week
This Month Is … Fireworks Safety Month


You suffer from a condition called ‘hyperhidrosis’ [‘hi-per-hi-DRO-sis’]. What’s your problem?
a. You can’t quit sneezing, sometimes honking as often as 5 times per minute.
b. When you walk on carpet, you get shocks from static electricity that are 5-times more intense than normal.
c. You sweat 5 times more than average people. [CORRECT. Fortunately, it can be corrected with surgery.]

• “Belching Sword Swallower Accidentally Impales Audience Member!”
• “Company Offers Space Alien Invasion Insurance!
• “NASA Finds Alien ‘Port-a-Potty’ on the Moon!”
• “Senior Coughs Up Embedded Nail After 35 Years!”
• “Death by Goldfish!”

Today’s Question: On average, people are doing this 5 years earlier than they did back in 1970.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Going grey.

Credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

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