Monday, June 5, 2017               Edition #5989

Deja Moo!

★ Kathy Griffin broke down in tears during a news conference to discuss the fallout from her posing with a likeness of President Donald Trump’s severed head. Griffin addressed the backlash that followed the photo being published, telling reporters that her career is over.   She says the Trump family systematically “mobilized their armies” against her. Meantime, the only remaining venue that would allow her to perform has just pulled the plug.  Griffin’s concert at the Uptown Theatre in Napa scheduled for June 17 has been cancelled. This follows 6 other cancellations in the wake of her controversial actions last week.  The latest cancellation is especially significant because the decision was apparently made after she took the mic with her lawyer.
★ Sean Penn reportedly resolved a dispute with fellow passengers during a recent flight to New York.  He had just boarded the plane with his daughter Dylan when two male passengers  confronted him in a very “aggressive and rude manner” to get him to move his bags.  Rather than get into an argument with the men, Penn kept a cool head and simply alerted the crew about the dispute. As a result, both Sean and his daughter were bumped up from economy to first class.
(I’m not sure which is more surprising: That Penn was the peacemaker, or that he flies economy!)
★ Despite being one of the most eligible bachelors on the planet, Jon Hamm isn’t thrilled about being single.  Hamm, who split from Jennifer Westfeldt in 2015 after 18 years together, said this about bachelor life: “It’s hard to be single after being together for a long time. It’s really hard. It sucks.”
★ Tom Cruise has announced the title for the upcoming ‘Top Gun’ sequel.  In a new interview, Cruise revealed that the follow-up to his acclaimed 1986 film has been given the working title ‘Top Gun: Maverick’.  Why not ‘Top Gun 2′?  Tom says: “I didn’t want a number. You don’t need a number.” (On Cruise’s schedule for 2018: ‘Mission Impossible 6’…seriously!)
★ Lake Bell has given birth to a baby boy.  The 38 year-old and her husband Scott Campbell were married in 2013 and are already parents to 2-year-old daughter Nova.  The “Secret Lives of Pets” star debuted her baby bump in December at a dinner celebrating the opening of Campbell’s ‘Saved Tattoo’ studio in Los Angeles.

• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV):  John Lithgow, Riley Keough, Giles Martin, Thundercat featuring Michael McDonald & Kenny Loggins
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Kevin Hart, Ali Wentworth, the War on Drugs
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Kevin Kline, Sharon Horgan, Cage the Elephant, Jared Champion
• “Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Gordon Ramsay, Michael Strahan
• “Last Call with Carson Daly” (NBC/CTV):Thomas Middleditch, Night Beats, Katie Dippold ( R )
• “The Daily Show with Trevor Noah” (Comedy): Rev. Dr. William J. Barber II
• “@Midnight with Chris Hardwick” (Comedy): Jessica Lowe, Alan Yang, Jon Daly
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Scheana Marie, Shep Rose ( R )
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Tatiana Maslany, Erin Bowman
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Josh Duhamel
• “Harry” (NBC/CTV): Cuba Gooding Jr., Jill Kargman, Daniel Sunjata ( R )
• “The Real” (FOX): Renee Lawless ( R )
• “The Bachelorette” (ABC): DeMario pleads with Rachel for a second chance; eight of the bachelors mud wrestle.
• “2017 Stanley Cup Final” (NBC): Predators host the Penguins in Game 4 of the Stanley Cup Final.

• Ariana Grande – pulled off a surprise visit to Manchester bombing victim Jaden Farrell-Mann in hospital.  The 10-year-old has been at the Royal Manchester Children’s Hospital since the attack, where she has already undergone two operations.  Grande also visited with some
other youngsters.  Jaden’s mother says her daughter was “absolutely amazed” to see Grande.
Prince William had visited earlier in the day.
• Black Eyed Peas – Fergie has confirmed she has not departed from the Black Eyed Peas, insisting she is simply focusing on her solo album.  Frontman sparked rumors Fergie had left the group when he hinted she wouldn’t be joining him, Taboo and at Ariana Grande’s big Manchester, England benefit on Sunday.  Fergie is working on a solo album.
• Chris Cornell – Christian Bale, Billy Idol, Courtney Love, Gavin Rossdale, Josh Brolin, Pharrell Williams and James Franco were among the mourners at the funeral and memorial service for the Soundgarden frontman at Hollywood Forever Cemetery in Los Angeles.  Meanwhile, the toxicology report on his body showed that in addition to the Ativan that Cornell was known to be taking, he also had several other prescription drugs in his system at the time of his death.
• Drake – his feud with Ludacris is finally at an end. In his acceptance speech at the Billboard Music Awards, Drake called out the “Vitamin D” rapper, saying he has got nothing but love for him.  Afterward, Ludacris confirmed the long-term battle is done.
• Radiohead – Tom Yorke says spirits haunted the recording of their ‘OK Computer’ album.  He says Ghosts would talk to him as he slept, and once compelled him to cut his own hair.  The band is releasing a 20th-anniversary reissue of the classic album.
• Eagles – will have even more star power when they hit the stage at the Classic West and East festivals this summer.  They have recruited Vince Gill to perform with them.  It was previously announced that the legendary band would also be joined by the late Glenn Frey’s son Deacon.
• Chris Stapleton – has issued a statement about his eight postponed shows, citing a broken bone and detached tendon in one of his index fingers as the cause. He apologized to fans and stressed that he is already on the road to recovery.
• Carrie Underwood – is incredibly supportive of her husband Mike Fisher and his NHL team, the Nashville Predators. During game 2 of the finals on Wednesday, she got more than a little passionate on Twitter when after a series of heated tweets she wrote, “Just told my manager that she might have to lock me out of my own Twitter!” The Predators disagreed, replying to her tweet with, “You keep being you, Carrie!!” (See today’s Celebirthdays)

Up until now, the article of clothing for summer that had everyone talking was the RompHim.
In May, a group of business school students announced the launch of the light and airy one-piece for guys that aimed to answer the “What should I wear?” question for men to ummm…romp around in at a summer concert or pool party.  Well, here is the competition.  Lace shorts for men are here, sort of.  An Instagram account titled ‘Sparkie Baby Official’ uploaded a photo of ‘Lacy Shorts’, pastel pink, blue, and green lace belted shorts, modeled by men wearing high white socks and sneakers. The post was accompanied with the caption; “Would you wear these, gentlemen?  Ladies,  would you like to see your boyfriend or husband rock one of these?”  They are not really a thing…yet.  Rapper Cazwell commissioned a designer to create the pastel lace shorts with matching shirts for his next single.  But after posting a photo of the outfits to Instagram, Cazwell received more than 8,300 likes – and SO many positive comments that you know some opportunistic entrepreneur will jump aboard this train and bring it to the masses….ready or not!
(Maybe for Summer 2018?)
(If nothing else, the see-thru nature of the lace fabric will force guys to up their undershorts game!)
A picture is worth a thousand words:

1.  Avoid Specials: Not only do you have to listen to your waiter for 2 minutes as he lists the evening’s delicacies, but when they list 10 specials, that’s not special at all. “Specials are there to disappear throughout the evening.” (Yesterday’s chicken dinner special is today’s chicken soup special!)
2.  Don’t Fall for Boastful Wording: Many tourist traps have the word “famous” or “iconic” on their menus.  It’s a trick chefs use to make you think their food has been vetted by someone way more important than you. Sometimes dishes labeled as award-winning really have earned an award, but more often, it’s just a gimmick. (If they’ve won award for clean restrooms, then I want to know about it!)
3.  Haggle the Cost of Wine: Ask for the ‘bin end’ list, which is a fancy way of referring to bottles with scratched labels or the restaurant’s poorest selling varieties. If you’d rather be upfront about what you’re looking to spend, just state it. (Like a kid with a mitt full of coins: “What can I get for THIS much??)
4.  A Reservation for Three Equals a Bigger Table for Two: Book your reservation for the number of people in your party plus one more. You’ll have more room to spread out instead of getting stuck in the corner like a doorstop.  (It’s ok, I’m eating for two, as usual)
(Plus, like Gordon, always make it a point to swear at the chef!)
-Woman’s Day

Some people are able to drop their head on the pillow and blissfully saw logs until the alarm goes off in the morning.  Others are not so lucky.  More than 40 percent of people report having trouble staying asleep, according to the National Sleep Foundation. Actually, sleeping right through the night is a fairly recent thing.  Before the 1800s, it was common to sleep in 2 or more shifts of ‘segmented sleep’.  These two sleeps — sometimes called first and second sleep, sometimes ‘dead sleep’ and ‘morning sleep’ — bridged an interval of ‘quiet wakefulness’ that lasted an hour or more.  During the period of nighttime wakefulness, different cultures participated in rituals — of prayer, eating lightly, lovemaking, dream interpretation, or security checks.  Somehow, probably due to the advancement in home lighting and other technology, these rituals became disrupted in the modern West.  How do you fall back to sleep when you wake in the middle of the night?  Experts suggest meditation, stretching, and breathing exercises.
(I suggest going to the bathroom!)
(I hate it most when I wake up around 3pm….because there are still 2 more hours of work!)
(Quiet wakefulness.  That’s what I’ll call it next time I’m waiting to let the dog back in at 4am!)


1956 [61] Kenny G, Seattle, WA, Saxophonist (Best-selling jazz saxophone player who has been recognized as one of the most commercially successful instrumental musicians of all time.)

1971 [46] Mark Wahlberg, Dorchester MA, movie actor (“Ted”, “The Fighter”)/TV producer (“Boardwalk Empire”, “Entourage”)/Businessman ( co-owns ‘Wahlburgers’ chain with his brothers Donnie and Paul)

1978 [39] Nick Kroll, Town Of Rye, NY, TV actor (“Kroll Show 2013-2015, movies “Sausage Party”, Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie”)

1979 [38] Pete Wentz, Wilmette IL, rock bassist-singer (Fall Out Boy-“She’s My Winona”, “This Ain’t a Scene It’s an Arms Race”)

1980 [37] Mike Fisher, Peterborough ON, NHL hockey forward (Nashville Predators)/wed to country star Carrie Underwood since 2010

1981 [36] Sebastien Lefebvre, Montréal QC, rock guitarist (Simple Plan-“Summer Paradise”, “Welcome to My Life”)

• “Thank God It’s Monday Day”,  Mondays are bad enough, but why do they have to be at the start of the week?  Some celebrate this day on the first Monday back to work after the New Year, but that is way too much to handle all at once!
• “Hot Air Balloon Day”, commemorating the 1st hot air balloon flight, by the Montgolfier Brothers in Annonay, France in 1783.
• World Environment Day”, declared annually since 1972. The 2017 theme is ‘7 Billion Dreams. 1 Planet. Consume With Care’.
• “Gingerbread Day”, gingerbread is a sweet food that typically uses honey or molasses rather than just sugar and is flavored with ginger.
• “Moonshine Day”, celebrating the history of ‘white lightning’, ‘mountain dew’, ‘hooch’, or ‘Tennessee white whiskey’, the high-proof distilled spirit generally produced illicitly, turning ordinary men (and women) into criminals and common criminals into legends.

[Tues] D-Day
[Tues] Drive-In Movie Day
[Tues] Gardening Exercise Day
[Wed] Chocolate Ice Cream Day
[Wed] Daniel Boone Day
[Wed] June Bug Day

2005 [12] “Monty Python’s Spamalot” wins 3 Tony Awards, including ‘Best Musical’

2010 [07] The UN Environment Agency appoints actor Don Cheadle a ‘Goodwill Ambassador’ at a ceremony in Rwanda to mark “World Environment Day”

2004 [13] About 40 guests watch as Jennifer Lopez weds her 3rd husband, Marc Anthony, in an intimate ceremony in the backyard of her LA home (they separate in 2011, divorce 2012)

1993 [24] Julie Krone rides 13-to-1 longshot Colonial Affair to victory in the Belmont Stakes, to become the 1st female jockey ever to win a Triple Crown horse race

2003 [14] 37-year-old Indiana native Brad Hauter arrives in NYC after riding his Yard-Man lawnmower 5,600 miles across the USA from San Francisco CA … at 10 mph


The only difference between white and brown eggs is the hen that lays them.  In particular, the color of a hen’s earlobes determines the color of her eggs.

✓ “Will I die from drinking hot sauce?”
✓ “If I sneeze with my eyes open, will they fall out?”
✓ “Can you blow out your brain through your nose?”
✓ “Can the brown parts on bananas give you cancer?”
✓ “Can you catch a cold from talking to someone with a cold on the phone?”
✓ “Can you die from not peeing for two days?”
✓ “What happens if you get a booger in your eye?”
✓ “If I swallow my tongue ring, will it affect my baby?”
✓ “What percent of your sweat is pee?”
✓ “Why do my burps taste like pickles when I didn’t eat pickles?”

Whenever I fill out an application, where it says “In case of emergency, notify:” I always put ‘Doctor’.  Because what’s my mother going to do?

☎What have you tried just one time before giving it up forever? (#1 answer in a related poll is rollerblading, followed by golf.)

Who was the legendary Benedictine monk who invented champagne?
a. Dom Perignon [CORRECT]
b. Benedictine Arnold
c. Samuel Adams
d. Perrier Jouet

Question:  An estimated 75% of people who have this say they almost never use it.  What is it?
Answer: a Pool Table!!!

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember: The Fire Department uses water.

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