Wednesday, March 9, 2016        Edition: #5643

Get Sheet-Faced Every Morning!

★ 25-year-old Emma Watson is taking a 1-year sabbatical from her acting career to concentrate entirely on promoting her organization HeForShe, which aims to raise awareness of women’s rights worldwide. Quote: “This is the most fun I’ve ever had … it just feels like I’m really doing what I’m meant to be doing.” Following her break from acting, Emma will return to the screen playing ‘Belle’ in the live-action adaptation of Disney’s “Beauty & The Beast”.
– “Esquire Magazine”
★ 60-year-old actress Geena Davis is appearing in an upcoming reboot of the horror movie classic “The Exorcist”. The Oscar-winner will top-line a ‘modern reinvention’ of author William Blatty’s 1971 novel in a FOX-TV pilot. The serialized psychological thriller follows a family’s battle with horrifying demonic possession. It’s Davis’ first smallscreen starring role since the short-lived 2005 series “Commander in Chief”, in which she played the US president.
★ Model Amber Rose (32) apparently isn’t serious about her new romance with an NBA basketball player. The ex of rappers Wiz Khalifa and Kanye West has moved on from hip hop stars to Toronto Raptor Terrence Ross (25). They’ve been dating since February but she’s in no rush for things to turn serious. An insider says: “He’s very young, so she is just having fun.” Amber has been spotted courtside at several Raptors games recently.
★ Turns out that much discussed ‘new’ nude pic of Kim Kardashian on Instagram is actually from a year ago. 35-year-old Kardashian has tweeted that she’s flattered people think she’s slimmed down so much after the birth of her 2nd child Saint West, but confesses it was taken a year and 25 lbs ago. Accompanying the typically revealing image is a caption which reads: “When you’re like I have nothing to wear LOL.”
★ TV personality  Erin Andrews will get nowhere near $55 million she was awarded in court Monday. The FOX-TV sportscaster and co-host of ABC-TV’s “Dancing With the Stars” won an unprecedented award over voyeur videos taken of her naked in a hotel room. But half is supposed to come from stalker Michael Barrett, who’s apparently broke. As for the other half, expect the 2 owners of the Nashville Marriott to appeal or at least reach a settlement before going to trial. Then, after legal costs and taxes, one estimate predicts Erin’s final take will be closer to $6 million.
★ And 59-year-old actress Kim Cattrall is laughing off a blunder made by CBS-TV’s “60 Minutes” on Sunday. In a segment on Canada’s new 44-year-old prime minister, Justin Trudeau, the venerable news magazine used a photo of his father, former Canadian leader Pierre Trudeau, standing beside a woman identified as Justin’s mother, Margaret Trudeau. Turns out it was actually a 1981 pic taken with former “Sex & The City” star Cattrall. The actress has since tweeted Trudeau saying she “couldn’t be more proud” to be his mom.

• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Lukas Nelson & The Promise Of the Real (“Wasted”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – St Lucia (“Matter”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – The Soft Moon (“Deeper”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Esperanza Spalding (“Emily’s D + Evolution”).
• “Live With Kelly & Michael” (syndicated/CTV) – Trisha Yearwood (“PrizeFighter: Hit After Hit”).
• “The Real” (syndicated) – Redfoo (“Party Rock Mansion”, out March 18th).
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Macy Gray (“The Way”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Halsey (“Badlands”). Rerun.
• “Victoria’s Secret Swim Special” (CBS) – Models talk about their swimwear campaign in St Barth’s.
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Bonnie Raitt (“Dig in Deep”).
• “The Voice” (NBC/CTV2) – A recap of the blind auditions, previously unseen moments, and a look ahead at the battle rounds.
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo) – Loretta Lynn (“Full Circle”).

• AC/DC – Frontman Brian Johnson has been ordered to bow out of the band’s current “Rock or Bust World Tour” or he’ll risk total hearing loss. He’ll be sitting out the remaining 10 dates on the US leg of the trek. The gigs are being rescheduled “likely with a guest vocalist”.
• Aretha Franklin – A judge has now halted a bio-film about her from being shown, but the injunction is not intended to kill the “Amazing Grace” documentary but to save time, money, and court resources while the ‘Queen of Soul’ and producer Alan Elliot come to terms on a deal.
• Dolly Parton – She’s set to embark on her first major North American tour in over 25 years. She’s planning to play more than 60 cities throughout the US and Canada, but specific dates are yet to be announced. Her new double album “Pure & Simple’ is due this Summer.
• Gwen Stefani – The nanny at the center of her and Gavin Rossdale’s marriage split is pregnant with a 1st child, 7 months after Gwen & Gavin announced their 13-year marriage was over. Mindy Mann’s sister has spilled the beans on social media, tagging a pic of Mindy and new boyfriend Spencer Gutcheon in the accompanying snaps.
• Justin Bieber – Tonight in Seattle WA he embarks on the massive North American “Purpose Tour”. He’s performing 58 concerts in 50 cities, wrapping up at NYC’s Madison Square Garden on July 18th.
• Kelly Clarkson – After 2 painful pregnancies, the expectant mom tells Australia’s KIIS FM she’s done having kids. She’s currently in the final weeks of pregnancy with her 2nd child (a boy) with husband Brandon Blackstock.

A statistical look at who we are and the things we do …
• 90% of us own a T-shirt from a theme park or attraction.
• 68% of men would never admit to using mousse.
• 44% of men admit they have flirted with a bank teller.
• 42% of phone owners have ruined their device by putting it in the washing machine.
• 20% of us only display books because we think it makes us look smarter.
• 7% of women dry their hair before weighing themselves because they believe it makes them lighter.

Cutting-edge vocab …
• ‘Guitarpenter’ – A carpenter who makes guitars.
• ‘Makerspace’ – A workshop that offers tools, materials, and expertise for people to work on do-it-yourself projects. ‘Makerspaces’, ‘hackerspaces’, and ‘fab labs’ are popping up all over NYC.
• ‘Pluto-Populism’ – A political movement in which a wealthy individual (say, someone named Trump) offers ideas and policies that appeal to the common person.

A 22-year-old Australian tattoo artist is making headlines after offering free tattoos to people with scars from self-harm. Quote: “I want you to be able to look down at the scars that bring you pain, embarrassment, shame, and be able to put those feelings behind you and instead feel proud of the body part that now contains art and offers a new beginning.” The only problem is, Whitney Develle’s online posting has gone viral, and she’s gotten so many responses she’s  had to update her offer. She’ll now provide 50 free tattoos between March 17th and the end of the year, and offer discounts to others who want to cover their self-harm scars. (What happens when you want to cover the tattoo?)
– BuzzFeed News

Facebook is set to pay each of its UK workers … a $1.1 million bonus. It’s not for purely altruistic reasons; it’s a creative way to save big on taxes. The company is paying out circa $397 million in total, with payments parceled out between now and the end of 2018. By doing so, Facebook can count the cash as ‘taxable expenses’ and slash a large amount off the net profit it has to pay corporate tax on. While the soon-to-be millionaire staffers are celebrating the British government is likely frustrated, as just a week ago Facebook promised it would revamp its tax structure after criticism it was avoiding taxes in the UK. It’s not the only company to take advantage of the loophole, as Amazon and other multinationals have taken advantage as well. (Note to self: Speak to boss about how to avoid corporate tax …)
– NBC News

A ranking of drugs by addiction experts …
1. Heroin – Based on how it tweaks the brain’s award system (increasing dopamine levels by up to 200%), dope, junk, horse, china white, etc is deemed the most addictive.
2. Alcohol – It’s estimated that about 22% of people who imbibe will develop alcohol dependence at some point.
3. Cocaine – Abnormal activation of the brain’s reward pathways from cocaine can cause dopamine levels to spike more than 3 times normal. 21% of users develop a dependence.
4. Barbiturates (‘downers’) – Initially used to treat anxiety and to induce sleep. At low doses, barbiturates cause euphoria, but at higher doses they can be lethal.
5. Nicotine – The main addictive ingredient of tobacco. More than two-thirds of users report becoming addicted at some point during their life.

• The plural of cow used to be ‘kine’.
• Moon jellyfish can age backwards and regenerate body parts.
– “National Geographic”


1970 [46] Shannon Leto, Bossier City LA, alt-rock drummer (30 Seconds to Mars-“This is War”, “Kings & Queens”)/brother of actor-bandmate Jared Leto

1976 [40] Ben Mulroney, Montréal QC, TV personality (“eTalk Daily” since 2002, “Canadian Idol” 2003-08)/son of former prime minister Brian Mulroney

1980 [36] Chingy (Howard Bailey Jr), St Louis MO, rapper (w/Tyrese-“Pullin’ Me Back”, “Right Thurr”)

1986 [30] Brittany Snow, Tampa FL, movie actress (“Pitch Perfect” films, “Hairspray”)  COMING UP: “Pitch Perfect 3” (2017).

1987 [29] Bow Wow (Shad Moss), Columbus OH, movie actor (“The Fast & the Furious: Tokyo Drift”, “Roll Bounce”)/rapper (w/R Kelly-“I’m a Flirt”, w/Chris Brown-“Shortie Like Mine”)

• “Amerigo Vespucci Day” [‘vuhs-POOCH-ee’], commemorating the Italian’s 1454 birth in Florence. He’s the marginally-successful explorer that a European mapmaker chose as namesake for the ‘New World’, as in ‘North Amerigo’.
✓ “No action in the National League last night but in the Vespuccian League …
✓ “Brazil is the economic engine of South Vespucci …”
✓ “Vespucci the beautiful …”
✓ “Next time you’re on the move, call North Vespuccian Van Lines …”
✓ “I’m Ryan Seacrest and this is ‘Vespuccian Idol’ …”
✓ “… has been certified platinum by the Recording Industry Association of Vespucci.”
✓ “USV! USV! …”

• “Barbie Day”, the anniversary of the day the world’s most successful doll was first unveiled in 1959 at NYC’s “International Toy Fair”. More than 900 million Barbies have been sold since.  BS FACTOID: ‘Barbie’ now has a smart home with wi-fi and voice-activated lighting, according to Tech

• “Discover What Your Name Means Day”, when we’re encouraged to look up interesting tidbits about names as part of “Celebrate Your Name Week”.

• “Get Over It Day”, whatever it is that’s put that chip on your shoulder – a perceived slight, a public embarrassment, a failed relationship. Today’s the day to get over it and get on with your life.

• “Registered Dietitian Day”, the 9th annual observance commemorating the dedication of RDs as advocates who advance our nutritional status.

2005 [11] Dan Rather signs off for the last time as anchor of “The CBS Evening News”

2004 [12] 63-year-old singer Tom Jones is banned from wearing tight leather pants by his manager-son Mark, who insists he cease being a laughing stock and “dress his age”

2007 [09] Vocalist-guitarist Brad Delp of classic rock group Boston dies in Atkinson NH of suicide at age 55

2010 [06] Lil Wayne is sentenced to a year in prison at NYC’s Rikers Island jail after pleading guilty to gun possession

1964 [52] 1st Ford ‘Mustang’ car is manufactured (goes on to become a classic collectible)

2012 [04] The world’s oldest Charles Dickens film, dating from 1901 and featuring a depiction of a “Bleak House” character, is rediscovered by the British Film Institute

[Thurs] Mario Day
[Thurs] World Kidney Day
[Fri] South by Southwest Film Festival begins (Austin TX)
[Fri] “The Brothers Grimsby”; “The Perfect Match”; “10 Cloverfield Lane” open in movie theaters
[Sat] “Kids’ Choice Awards” (Nickelodeon)
[Sun] Daylight Saving Time begins
This Week Is … Read an eBook Week
This Month Is … Chronic Fatigue Syndrome Awareness Month


• AOL online chat rooms.
• Y2K.
• Lorena Bobbitt.
• “Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?”
• Columbia House Record & Tape Club
• Mix tapes recorded from the radio.
• Only knowing what photos look like after taking them to the store to get developed.
• The sound of dial-up modems.
• Basic human decency.
– Thanks to Maggie Utgoff

What was the first song to be performed in outer space?
a. “Louie Louie”
b. “Happy Birthday” [CORRECT. Sung by Apollo IX astronauts March 8, 1969.]
c. “The Macarena”

OMG, look at you this morning! Anyone else hurt in the accident?

☎ Which number do you find least trustworthy? (We say 5 is unreliable; really shifty.)

Question: To do THIS, you need to make a 7.5 degree change.
Answer: Knock over a bowling pin.

It’s easier to do good than be good.

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