Tuesday, September 29, 2015        Edition: #5338

Get a Load of This Sheet!

★ Music streaming has just become a billion-dollar industry. Digital downloads of songs have continued to fall out of favor in the first half of the year, while free and paid music-streaming revenue kept growing, even without much of a bump from the launch of Apple Music. That’s according to mid-year sales figures released by the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA). They show that overall music industry revenue fell a half-percentage point to $3.2 billion, but streaming revenue surpassed $1 billion in the first half of the year for the first time.
– Telegraph.co.uk
★ In the murky world of branded tweets (where a celeb is paid to tweet out how much they love a product) vloggers are totally cashing in. Troye Sivan (Australian actor/singer/songwriter, social media douchebag) is one of the new breed of online influencers. If you’d like him to mention a product or a TV show his endorsement will cost you AUD $4,000 per tweet. That’s $28.57 per character.
– PopBitch.com
★ Movie star Vin Diesel has revealed he will bow out of the “Fast & Furious” franchise … after ”one final trilogy”. The 48-year-old actor/producer is currently working on finding a director for the 8th movie in the series. Writing on Facebook, Vin says: ”Universal has been so good to me and so trusting of the vision… they have been like family. I promised the studio I would deliver one last trilogy to end the saga.”
– Bang Showbiz
★ And actress Leah Remini is planning to further invoke the wrath of Scientologists by publishing a memoir about her life as a former member of the controversial church. The former “King of Queens” star quit the organization in 2013 after criticizing officials’ treatment of its followers, and has subsequently become a target of the church and its adherents. “Troublemaker: Surviving Hollywood and Scientology” is set for publication by Random House imprint Ballantine Books on November 3rd.
– WENN.com

• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Andrew McMahon (“Andrew McMahon In the Wilderness”).
• “iHeartRadio Music Festival” (CW) – The first of a 2-consecutive-night special highlighting the 5th annual event in Las Vegas NV held September 18-19. This year’s lineup includes Blake Shelton, Coldplay, Jason Derulo, Jennifer Lopez, Kanye West, Kenny Chesney, Lil Wayne, Sam Smith, The Weeknd and more.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Slightly Stoopid (“Meanwhile … Back At the Lab”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Lagwagon (“Hang”).
• “The Real” (syndicated) – The Game (“The Documentary 2”).
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – James Taylor (“Before This World”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Joe Jonas’ band DNCE (“Cake By the Ocean”).
• “The Voice” (NBC/CTV2) – More hopefuls perform for the judges as blind auditions continue.
• World of Bluegrass (Raleigh NC) – The International Bluegrass Music Association’s annual event runs through Saturday with the 2015 IBMA Awards a part of the agenda. Actor/musician Steve Martin is among this year’s recipients, garnering a ‘Distinguished Achievement Award’.

• Blake Shelton – He’s set to release the compilation album “Reloaded: 20 #1 Hits” on October 23rd.
• Chris Brown – He’s signed to become a regular in Las Vegas after landing a club residency deal for at least 6 shows at Drai’s for $50,000-a-pop. Trey Songz is also in talks to rotate gigs with Brown.
• Drake / Future – Their surprise new album “What a Time to Be Alive” tops the latest ‘Billboard 200’ album chart after having the 3rd-biggest debut week of the year.
• Florida Georgia Line – They’re signed to headline the Daytona 500 pre-show next year. They’ll take the stage prior to the 58th Daytona 500 NASCAR Sprint Cup Series race on February 21st in Daytona Beach FL.
• Kanye West – In a new interview with “Vanity Fair”, he says he’s in no hurry to finish his new album “Swish” and it could still be a year away.
• Mark Ronson – He tells “Sunday Telegraph” he made 17 different versions of his 2014 release “Uptown Funk”, featuring ”different bass lines, different hooks, different everything”. He credits Bruno Mars with shaping the final version into a mega-hit.
• Pink Floyd – Tonight “Roger Waters: The Wall Live” documentary screens in over 2,000 theaters around-the-world. The film covers his 2010-13 tour of the Pink Floyd classic album. The tour doc had its premiere at the 2014 Toronto Film Festival.
• Tyga – The rapper has asked his girl Kylie Jenner to stop posting videos of him on Snapchat. The 25-year-old expressed his unhappiness about constantly being filmed for social media, asking: ”Why do you post everything?” Ironically, his plea has been shared on Snapchat.
• The Weeknd – He’s become only the 10th artist ever to replace themselves at #1 on the ‘Billboard Hot 100’. Only The Beatles did it 3 times running.
• Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Frontwoman Karen O is a first-time mom as she & director-husband Barnaby Clay have welcomed a baby boy. Karen O has been married to Clay since 2011.

Out today on DVD, Netflix, Google Play and/or other video providers …
•”Entourage” ( R-Rated Comedy ): Movie star ‘Vincent Chase’, together with his posse, is back in biz with super agent-turned-studio head ‘Ari Gold’ on a risky project that will serve as his directorial debut. Based on the 2004-11 TV series. Stars Adrian Grenier, Jeremy Piven.
• “Spy” ( R-Rated Action Comedy ): Melissa McCarthy is back on the bigscreen, this time playing a desk-bound CIA analyst. When her partner (Jude Law) goes missing, she volunteers to go undercover to infiltrate the world of a deadly arms dealer and thereby prevent a global disaster. Co-stars Rose Byrne, Jason Statham.
• “Poltergeist” ( PG-13 Horror Thriller ): Legendary filmmaker Sam Raimi and director Gil Kenan reimagine and contemporize the 1982 thriller about a family whose suburban home is haunted by evil forces. They must come together to rescue their youngest daughter after the apparitions take her captive. Stars Sam Rockwell, Rosemarie DeWitt, Kennedi Clements, Saxon Sharbino.
• Also released today: “The Bear” (25th Anniversary Collector’s Edition); “Bones: The Complete 10th Season” (TV); “Grimm: Season 4” (TV); “iZombie: The Complete 1st Season” (TV); “Jane The Virgin: The Complete 1st Season” (TV); “Murder In the Park” (Documentary); “Nowitzki: The Perfect Shot” (Documentary); and “Outlander: Season 1” (TV).

A new service in Tokyo, Japan offers a handsome guy to wipe away your tears. It’s part of Hiroki Terai’s rui-katsu (‘tear-seeking’) enterprise. Terai began public crying events in 2013, inviting people to view sad movie clips and then cry together. He’s also published a book with photos of male models crying. His latest venture, Ikemeso Danshi, allows you to click through an online catalogue of gorgeous gents before choosing one to pay you an office visit. There, he’ll wipe away your tears or – if you need some help opening the floodgates – shows you some waterworks-inducing videos. The cost of this soggy catharsis – 7,900 yen, roughly $65. (That’s enough to make you weep right there.)
– DeathandTaxesMag.com

The latest annual ranking of the highest-paid people in the hip hop genre over the past year …
1. Diddy … $60 million, mostly due to his diverse investments and businesses.
2. Jay Z … $56 million.
3. Drake … $35.9 million.
4. Dr Dre … $33 million, primarily from his position at Apple Music
5. Pharrell Williams … $32 million.
– Forbes.com

Performing ordinary tasks in an unusual manner is a way to ‘cross-train your brain’ and keep mentally sharp, according to the book “Keep Your Brain Alive”. These changes to your routine are referred to as ‘Neurobic’ exercises. For instance, try wearing mittens while you drive, sniffing vanilla while at your desk at work in the morning, or eating meals with the wrong hand. These little deviations from your normal routine are all said to exercise your brain and improve your memory. (Not to mention cause people to mock you mercilessly.)
– PA News

These English-language movies were re-titled in China. But when we translate their Chinese titles back into English, things get a little weird …
✗ “Seabed General Mobilization” (“Finding Nemo”)
✗ “United States Cheat Bureau” (“American Hustle”)
✗ “Interstellar Special Ability Team” (Guardians Of the Galaxy”)
✗ “Ace Announcer” (“Anchorman”)
✗ “Touring Around On a Flying House” (“Up”)
✗ “Run! Run! Cloudzilla!” (“Twister”)
✗ “One Night, Big Belly” (“Knocked Up”)
✗ “Wretch! Let Me Chop Off Your Finger” (“The Piano”)
✗ “Mysterious Murder In Snowy Cream” (“Fargo”)
✗ “Mr Cat Poop” (“As Good As It Gets”)
– Adapted from List25.com

Selfies have killed more people than shark attacks so far in 2015.
– “The Independent”


1948 [67] Bryant Gumbel, New Orleans LA, TV personality (“Real Sports With Bryant Gumbel [HBO] since 2005, “The Early Show” [CBS] 1999-2002, “Today” [NBC] 1982-97)

1973 [42] Danick Dupelle, Montréal QC, country guitarist-vocalist (Emerson Drive-“Moments”, “Fall Into Me”)

1980 [35] Dallas Green, St Catharines ON, indie-rock singer-songwriter (City & Colour-“Thirst”, “Fragile Bird”)

• “International Coffee Day”, celebrating one of the world’s favorite beverages. It’s also intended to promote fair trade coffee and to raise awareness of the plight of coffee growers.

• “Make a List Of the Top 10 Happiest Days in Your Life Day”, when we’re encouraged to jot down details … while we can still remember.

• “Michaelmas”, the feast day of St Michael the Archangel, the patron saint of exorcists. It’s also known as “Goose Day” in some places, thanks to the old English proverb which says, “If you eat goose on Michaelmas Day, you will never want money all the year round.” In the Middle Ages it celebrated the end of harvest, when laborers were paid for their work with meat, ale, fish, ale, good bread … and ale.

• “Veterans of Foreign Wars Day”, honoring the 1899 establishment of the ‘VFW’ vets’ organization.

• “World Heart Day”, a chance for people across the globe to take part in the world’s biggest intervention against cardiovascular disease.
NET: http://tinyurl.com/27ozjm5

2013 [02] The highly-anticipated series finalé of “Breaking Bad” airs on AMC, drawing a record 10.3 million viewers

2001 [14] Jennifer Lopez marries her 2nd husband, Chris Judd, in Los Angeles (they separate 8 months later)

2014 [01] eBay Inc announces that it’s splitting off its PayPal unit into a separate company

2008 [07] Following the bankruptcies of Lehman Bros and Washington Mutual, the Dow Jones Industrial Average falls 777.68 points, the largest single-day point-loss in its history

[Wed] “The Walk” opens in IMAX movie theaters
[Wed] Ask a Stupid Question Day
[Wed] International Translation Day
[Wed] Women’s Health & Fitness Day
This Week Is … World Hearing Aid Awareness Week
This Month Is …. Save a Tiger Month


✓ Spend way too much time on your phone. You’d like to think that what you’re doing is important, but you’re just responding to group chats and trying to muddle through Candy Crush.
✓ Steal food. You justify it by rationalizing that if there isn’t a note claiming ownership then it’s basically fair game.
✓ Snitch. Admit it … if you catch someone you don’t really like on your team strolling in late, you will send an email informing your manager.
✓ Suck up. As soon as you find anyone superior interacting with you, you casually mention how much you like their new shoes and that you work most nights until 7 pm.
✓ Shop online. You initially started out browsing clothes, but now it’s got to the point where you have your weekly groceries delivered to the office.
✓ Daydream. Why proofread copy when instead you could be imagining what it would be like to date a celebrity?
✓ Take aimless breaks. You need to find a reason to go for a walk every 90 minutes so you’ve perfected a wide range of activities to give them validity. Oh, you’re checking the printer again?
✓ Constantly blame IT – Instead of admitting you deleted a super-important email trail in order to make space in your mailbox for notes from your bestie, you instead blame the techies.
✓ Lie. With a straight face you will tell everyone that you were late to work because an escaped octopus was sprawled out on the expressway.
✓ Panic. Externally, you remain cool as cucumber in order to convince everyone that you are capable of doing your job. Internally you are melting.
– Adapted from “Metro”

☎ The absolute best way to have coffee is …

• Does the ‘reverse side’ also have a reverse side?
• When an agnostic dies, does he go to the ‘great perhaps’?
• If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?
• Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
• Why do scientists call it ‘REsearch’ when they’re looking for something new?
• People beginning work with a new company are usually on probation for the first 3 months. Why can’t we do that with politicians?

Finally, Donald Trump’s wacky hair (aka combover) is useful for something. Left click and slide your mouse across the screen to use it as a paintbrush here …
NET: http://paintwithdonaldtrump.com/

• This sea creature’s babies are called ‘elvers’. [Eels.]
• What do you call a group of geese? [A group of geese on the ground is a ‘gaggle’, but a group of geese in the air is a ‘skein’.]
• This animal is used by police to find dead bodies in lakes, ponds, and swamps. [The snapping turtle, which eats carrion.]
• A group of these animals is called a ‘sleuth’. [Bears.]
• What do you call a female ferret? [The female ferret is referred to as a `jill’.]

My dog refuses to play fetch with my frying-pan … maybe because it’s a non-stick?

Question: The average woman will have 6 of THESE per month.
Answer: Bad hair days.

Poverty begins at home.

Monthly Planning Calendar in Tomorrow’s “BS”!

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